Chapter One
Arianna
Six Months Later
“Fuck, Ari. Stop being a little bitch.” I curse myself as I stare at the front entrance to the building.
I swore to myself when I got out of the hospital that I wouldn’t hang my head in shame.
Coach fired me after being brutally raped and beaten.
No one believed me that I wasn’t the one who took the acid.
They didn’t give a shit. They were more concerned with the fact that I was in there after hours and that they had to pay for biohazard cleanup.
I was high out of my goddamn mind on top of all my injuries, and the moment I woke up and could speak, they fired me.
There are a lot of missing details, but I remember enough to make sense of it.
To know that this time I need to just shut the fuck up.
I turned two players in for sexually assaulting a girl in the locker room, and they didn’t like that.
Conrad Booth and Ethan McConnell are their star players as the center and the goalie, and clearly, they can do no wrong.
I thought I was doing the right thing by speaking up, but it was the biggest mistake of my life.
My next biggest mistake was deciding not to tell anyone who did it.
I was high and hallucinating, so it’s not like my words were reliable.
I spent weeks in the hospital and the last six months in physical therapy.
I was finally discharged from care, and now I am cleared to return to work.
I have my limitations, but I’m just a personal assistant, not a player.
I have to force myself to go into this fucking building and get my shit that they have been holding onto for the last six months first, though.
“Hey, Ari,” a hesitant voice says from behind me.
I beg myself not to tear up as I turn to face Logan.
Literally every other player but Conrad and Ethan is great.
They all came to visit when I was in the hospital and checked in with me via text daily, but this is the first time I have seen them in person.
I have a gnarly scar across my forehead that fades into my hairline. I am extremely happy they were able to avoid shaving my head, so the scar in the back of my head is hidden by my hair.
I suffered from a traumatic brain injury from the attack.
The blunt force trauma to the back of my head and even the hits to my face caused a brain contusion, brain swelling, and a moderately severe brain bleed.
I obviously had a concussion, but it could have been much worse if my brain had shifted around too much in my skull and had torn nerve fibers.
I might not be here if they had hit me even one more time.
I narrowly avoided brain surgery but managed with minimal long-term effects.
They tell me I am lucky to have survived, but they aren’t the ones who deal with the nightmares of being attacked by demons.
The one surgery I couldn’t avoid was repairing the perineal and rectal tearing.
My cervix was also damaged, but healed in time.
Turns out if you get fucked with hockey sticks, it rips you open. Who knew?
While they did that repair and stapled my scalp back together, they did the best they could with my hand.
One of the sick fuckers bit my goddamn pinky off.
Who in the fuck does that? I remember it happening, but it still blows my mind.
They picked the least useful finger to bite off, so it doesn’t affect me day to day, but still. What the fuck?
Long term, I have migraines and dizzy spells that will take me down fast if I push myself too hard.
I am learning my limits and also paying attention to my body so that I know when I need to relax.
The nerve pain hits me every so often, but it generally coincides with my migraines.
Physical therapy helped me significantly to help me stop pissing on myself.
I think that was the most embarrassing part of it all.
I sustained so much damage that my bladder said, “fuck you,” and I simply couldn’t hold it.
In the beginning, just existing was hard.
I had to relearn how to do a lot, but I was fucking determined to get as close to normal again.
“Hey, Logan,” I say timidly.
“Coming to get your things?” he asks.
“Yeah, I just… I haven’t been in here since that night, and… I’m just being dumb,” I say dismissively.
“Not dumb at all,” he says, waving to someone. “I’ll walk with you.”
“Ari!” Tate says as he jogs over and wraps me in a tight hug. I don’t expect it at first, so I freeze for a moment, eventually relaxing.
“Hey, Tate,” I say, quietly.
“I missed you. The new assistant is a bitch,” he says.
“Because they make you follow the rules?” I ask, and he grins.
“Did you find another team? Someone said you got another PA job,” Tate asks.
“Yeah. I am going to Detroit,” I say.
“Oof. The rival? That’s cold,” Logan teases.
“Well, that’s what happens when you fire someone because they were violently raped,” I say with a shrug. “Sorry, I know you don’t want to hear...”
“Don’t apologize. You have every right to say what happened to you,” Logan interrupts. “And when I find out who did it, they are fucking dead.”
“Logan.” I sigh.
“Sorry, Ari. That’s what happens when someone fucks with our girl,” Tate says. “Come on. The others will want to see you, too.”
I look at the front doors and sigh again. “Okay,” I answer timidly. Logan and Tate hook their arms with mine and walk in with me. We go the long way around to the locker rooms, intentionally keeping me away from the rink.
“Lady in the house,” Tate calls out as we walk in. My office was just past the coach’s office before you got into the actual dressing area. When we come around the corner, Beckett leaps over a bench to pick me up in a hug and spin me around.
“Put me down!” I laugh.
“Fuck, I have missed you, girl,” Beckett says as he grabs my face and sloppily kisses my forehead.
“Gross, Beck,” I say as I wipe his slobber off my skin.
“Miss Ari,” Jaxon says with a sweet smile.
He is the one I am the closest to. These four really are amazing.
I was afraid I’d lose them, or they’d disappear as everyone else did, but they were so fucking patient with me when I said I wasn’t ready to see them in person.
I’ve never had a problem with my appearance until I got my face bashed in and ended up with a nasty scar on my forehead.
“Hey, Jax,” I say, returning his smile. They really do know how to cheer me up, and they don’t even realize how much it means to me.
When Logan shifts over a step, I see them watching me from the bench. Conrad and Ethan have a blank look on their faces, trying to figure out if I remember. They fully intended to kill me that night, so I am sure seeing me standing here feels like I am threatening them.
“How have you been?” Jax asks me.
“Really good,” I say. “I start my new job tonight.”
“See? I told you things would work out,” Jax says.
“Yeah, and if we knew who hurt her, we could make things even better,” Tate growls.
“Detectives still don’t have any leads?” Beckett asks.
“No,” I say, making sure not to look at Conrad or Ethan even for a moment.
I don’t want them thinking I remember, or they really will kill me.
I know I should speak up, but I am terrified of what might happen.
I am honestly surprised I can even be in the same room with them, but I find safety in knowing that these four men would not let anyone hurt me.
“I don’t remember everything, and what I do remember is wildly unhelpful. ”
“Where is your new job?” Coach Sutter asks from behind us. I roll my eyes before turning to face him.
“The Detroit Reapers,” I say simply.
“And they know you do drugs?” he asks coldly.
“They know that I was drugged, raped, beaten, and left for dead. They know that I was fired for being assaulted at my workplace after my sexist, victim-shaming, piece of shit boss decided to take the side of whoever it is that hurt me,” I say with venom in my tone. “Where is my stuff?”
“In the closet by the showers,” he says. “For the record, the only reason I didn’t throw it away was that the police told me I couldn’t.”
“For the record, the only reason I haven’t sued you and everyone else responsible for firing me yet is because they are still investigating my rape and attempted murder,” I say.
“It’s funny; the first time in six months that the cameras weren’t working just so happened to be the same day that I almost died.
Hope they advised you to get a lawyer, too. ”
“I was already cleared, and you know that, Arianna,” he says, frowning. “Now, I know you are upset you lost your job, but…”
“You think I wanted to come back here?” I ask. “Are you that fucking stupid? Fired or not, I never would have returned to the place I almost died. I am upset because you are a soulless piece of shit. No fucking wonder your kids don’t talk to you anymore.”
“As bitchy as always,” Conrad says from behind me. “Some things never change.”
“Good to see you, Arianna,” Coach Sutter says. “Glad you are doing better.”
“Yeah, whatever,” I mutter. I turn around and come face-to-face with Conrad and Ethan. For just a moment, I can see that familiar evil look in their eyes.
“No hug for us?”
“I didn’t like you six months ago, and I still don’t now,” I say simply. “Move.”
“Always so sassy.” Ethan grins.
“Yeah, well, apparently not even getting my head bashed in will get rid of my attitude,” I say. I am quickly losing my courage as they stare at me, still looking for any sign that I know it was them. “Tate, can you help me with the boxes?”
“I sure can,” he says happily. “Beck, come help us.”
“Leaving already?” Logan asks.