Chapter 5 #2
Damned if he wasn’t confused by the sudden whiplash. “Is that what you think? I’m helping you because I think you can’t help yourself? That couldn’t be further from the truth. You’re one of the most capable people I’ve ever met.”
“You don’t know me.” She folded her arms across her chest, hugging her elbows.
The kiss had burned into his brain, branding him. He was invested whether he wanted to be or not. Emotion said he wanted nothing more than to be able to help Cassie. Logic warned she would never allow it. She was too headstrong to let herself depend on anyone else.
“Then tell me who you are,” he said.
“I would only disappoint you, Hudson.” She released a breath that caused her shoulders to deflate.
“You couldn’t.”
She shot him a glare that challenged him. “See? I already told you. You have no idea what a mess you’d be getting into by hanging around with me.”
“For your information, I don’t go around kissing people I barely know, so what happened in this kitchen is special to me,” he said, figuring honesty might not help the situation, but it sure as hell couldn’t hurt.
“I haven’t wanted to kiss anyone the same way I wanted to kiss you in longer than I care to say or remember.
But that kiss didn’t give me any rights. I’m clear on that.”
Her knuckles turned white from gripping the bullnose edge even tighter. Was he making progress or pushing her further away?
The fact that she wasn’t walking out made him believe the former rather than the latter. Knowing when to push and when to pull back had never been his strong suit, so he went on pure instinct.
“And just to make sure we’re on the same page, I’m not asking for anything from you.” He leaned against the counter. “I’m here to help in any way that makes sense for you. If you have an ex out there, stalking you—”
“You have no idea.” The panic in her eyes said he’d touched on the correct subject.
“I’m not afraid of anyone,” he said.
Her gaze darted to the door. “I should go.”
“I won’t stop you.” He grabbed his shirt off the back of the couch and then shrugged it on. He tucked his wallet in his back pocket and grabbed the keys off the hook in the kitchen. His truck had been returned last night while she’d slept. “You want to go back to the campsite?”
There was enough daylight to find the exact spot, but probably not much more. He’d held up dinner as long as possible in case she woke up hungry.
Cassie shifted her weight from one foot to the other and bit down on her bottom lip.
He didn’t need to be an expert at reading body language to tell that she hesitated making a decision.
The fact she was concerned about his safety touched his heart on many levels, but he was a grown-ass man capable of making his own determination as to who was a threat.
The news was filled with jealous lovers or husbands, abusive men trying to control their partners.
Hudson had experienced a bully and a coward firsthand in Beaumont.
Anyone who hits someone smaller or weaker than themselves couldn’t be classified any other way.
He should have stood up to Beaumont, but didn’t.
Instead, he’d done like the others and hightailed it out of town within hours of being handed their high school diploma.
Hell, he hadn’t waited around for graduation day, figuring his piece of paper could be mailed to the house just as easily.
Since Cassie still hadn’t taken a step, he saw another window to talk sense into her.
“This ranch is off the radar, and especially this cabin.” He wanted to give her logical reasons to stay instead of saying he didn’t want her to leave, especially after the kiss they’d shared.
“I have secrets, Hudson. You don’t want to get mixed up with me.”
“With all due respect, I’d like the opportunity to make that decision for myself.
” He stood there. She stood rooted. Neither made a move.
Again, he saw it as a good sign to keep going.
“I’ve been beaten and burned when I was a kid.
Physical pain, scars, those aren’t the things that last.” He paused for a beat. “You know what lasts?”
She gave a small headshake.
“The feeling of being defenseless, of being helpless. The anger that comes with not standing up for yourself. The shame.”
“You were a kid, Hudson. It’s not the same thing.”
“Abuse is still abuse, and it messes with your mind.” He’d struck a nerve when he’d said the word, shame. She’d squinted like she’d taken a physical blow. “Makes you feel small and insignificant.”
She bit that bottom lip again.
“When it happens from a young age, it’s like the elephant training story. The trainer uses a whip on you when you’re young, and you grow up afraid of the whip. It doesn’t matter that you eventually tower over the person holding the whip. The sight of it makes you shake with fear.”
A long, thoughtful pause was followed by, “You’re right.”
Those words carried the kind of weight that suggested she knew firsthand. Would she tell him more? Or close up again?