Chapter 20 Zayden
ZAYDEN
MY EYES STING WITH a mixture of sweat and exhaustion.
Coach Kennedy has just put us through one of the most gruelling training sessions we’ve had all season. This coming weekend we are playing the Stingrays, one of our biggest rivals, and although we beat them last time, Coach doesn’t want to take any chances.
Sweat clings to my skin and my feet feel heavy as I drag myself to the side of the field where the others are lining up.
After sprints and burpees, I’m struggling to catch my breath.
Each inhale of oxygen just doesn’t feel like it’s enough.
I think I’ve been getting too relaxed with my diet since being with Nora.
I get swept up in the dates and wanting to cook for her.
I like getting her to try different things and she loves my cooking.
It’s a win-win. I’m such a food lover, putting me on a restricted diet is hell.
Coach will kill me if he realises how off track I am with my diet. I spent so much time conditioning myself when it came to diet and self-control, but my priorities have been slipping lately. My mind has been preoccupied with one thing and one thing only: Nora Robertson.
‘Again,’ Coach says.
There’s a shaky inhale around me as the other boys accept his words.
He must be stressed about this game, because he hasn’t worked us this hard all season.
My muscles scream and protest as I force myself to run forward.
This is the last thing I want to be doing right now.
I’d much rather be at home, my arms wrapped around Nora, watching a movie.
I mentally slap myself. I need to focus.
This is exactly what Coach meant about distractions.
I’ve been working hard, though, and my grades are better.
Nora is incredibly patient with me and explains the work in a way that I understand.
I grind my molars when I hear Coach’s whistle. I’m so sick of hearing that damn thing. The fatigue is getting to me, making me irritated and sloppy with my movements.
After the longest thirty minutes of my life, I stumble into the locker room, feeling a little light-headed.
The air-conditioner cools my heated skin.
My shirt clings to me like a second skin and I peel it off, eyeing the mud and grass stains marking it.
Dropping into the seat, I dig my elbows into my thighs and hang my head, still catching my breath.
The boys around me do much the same, which makes me feel better.
Mason is the first to get to his feet, followed closely by Parker.
Parker is always in a hurry to leave and doesn’t always make it to practice.
I don’t know what sort of agreement he has with the Coach, but he certainly gets away with things no one else does.
I’ve tried to make conversation with him, I like getting to know everyone on the team, but he is always in such a rush that it makes it feel like he doesn’t have the time for anyone else.
Everyone shrugs the weird behaviour off because he’s the best player on the team besides Mason, and he also has a ‘don’t fuck with me’ look in his eyes that just makes you naturally steer clear.
Recently though, we have been playing so brilliantly together, it’s really bothering me that I don’t know anything about him.
The sound of boots being kicked off, water bottle lids being capped and uncapped and the low breathing of others fills the room. There is usually chatter and banter, but the room is quiet tonight; everyone is too tired to talk.
After showering and dressing, Mason and I head towards his truck.
‘I seriously debated faking an injury to get out of that practice,’ I mutter, combing my fingers through my damp hair, my skin still feeling too hot compared to the cool night breeze.
‘I did think you were running funny,’ Mason jokes. ‘Least you weren’t dry heaving like Andy. Thought he was going to choke out a hairball.’
‘He did have a weird resemblance to that cat that used to always be in our backyard,’ I muse, and we both chuckle at that. ‘Seriously though, what was up Coach’s ass today? Nothing was good enough, apparently.’
‘Dunno,’ Mason shrugs. ‘He was relentless. There’s being tough, and then there’s being unreasonable.’
‘I noticed he kept calling out to you, like you were responsible for the lagger. You were the only one keeping up with his commands.’
‘So it wasn’t just me?’ Mason asks, side-eyeing me. ‘Felt like he was all over me today, and I couldn’t work out why he was giving us all such a hard time.’
‘Like, I get it, we are playing a tough team on Friday, but killing us before we get to the game isn’t exactly a genius tactic.’
Mason is quiet for a moment. ‘Yeah. Well, as long as we play like we usually do, we will knock them dead. Prove to Coach that no matter what, we are always going to be the best on the team.’
We reach the truck and we bump fists. ‘Damn right we are.’
The house is quiet when we get home.
There’s a stillness in the air, like no one is home, but I know both girls are. There is usually the TV on or music playing, but it’s quiet. A few candles flicker in the darkness.
‘Seeya tomorrow,’ Mason says, taking the stairs two at a time.
I head up the stairs to my room, and a smile stretches across my face when I see Nora in bed. She’s sitting in her spot, the blankets pulled up, with the lamp on. A book sits in her lap, and that makes me realise why it’s so quiet. Both girls were probably reading.
‘Sorry I’m so late,’ I say to her, fighting off a yawn. ‘Coach was on my ass today. I mean, everyone’s ass. I’m fucking wrecked.’ I pause, noticing her face. Something is wrong. Slowly, I walk over to the bed and sink down onto it. ‘What’s wrong?’
She inhales shakily. ‘Something happened while you were out.’
‘What?’ I ask in panic, reaching for her hand.
She tells me everything from start to finish. My mouth falls open the more she talks as I try to keep up.
‘Holy shit,’ I breathe. ‘That is scary. I’m glad you got out of it okay. I’m sorry I wasn’t there.’
‘It’s fine,’ she says, although she looks anything but fine. ‘You have a life too. Mine just seems to be in shambles whenever I go back to that stupid apartment.’
‘At least it’s done now; you don’t have to go back. We can make a report to the police if you want to, or tell the office. Anything to ensure she doesn’t come near you on campus. I can escort you everywhere if it’s necessary. Whatever you want to do.’
‘I love you.’ She smiles, sliding her fingers between mine. ‘You’re such a wonderful, supportive person. I’m truly so lucky to have met you.’
I capture her face between my hands and kiss her. ‘I love you, too.’
Exhaling, she shifts so that she is lying on my chest. I wrap my arms around her, tugging her close.
‘How are you feeling?’ I ask softly.
‘I just keep repeating what she said over and over again. When I close my eyes, I see all the photos of me. She must have followed me for years, and I had no idea.’
‘That is honestly terrifying. You seem to be handling this so much better than me. I would be losing my shit.’
She smiles weakly. ‘I’m really scared, Zayden. I don’t feel safe leaving the house.’
Anger spurs inside me at the girl who has done this. So many feelings war inside my chest. Anger, hopelessness, frustration … I pull Nora into me, even though it’s impossible to get any closer.
‘You’re safe with me, Vixen. I promise.’
‘I just feel … stupid,’ she confesses, lower lip trembling. ‘I’m embarrassed that I trusted this person. You see warnings for online relationships all the time, how you can’t trust people and the internet is a dangerous place, but he – she, I mean – seemed so genuine. I’m fucking humiliated.’
‘Hey,’ I say gently, shifting her so that she is forced to look at me.
‘Don’t do that. Don’t be so hard on yourself.
This person lied to you and manipulated you.
Their life is sad, pathetic and miserable.
You need to remind yourself that you did nothing wrong, you shouldn’t be embarrassed, and remember, you are much better off than them.
You have so many good things going for you.
It’s okay to feel hurt and betrayed – because you are – but do not let her have this power over you. ’
She slowly nods, another tear running down her cheek.
‘Besides, you have me, and I’m going to be here for you no matter what. Okay?’ I say, swiping at her tears.
She leans into my hand, her eyes fluttering closed. ‘Okay.’
The next morning, I’m up early – for once in my life – and cooking breakfast for everyone.
Nora appears first, showered and dressed for the day.
We had woken earlier this morning and spoke for a bit before she fell back to sleep.
She looks more like herself than she did last night.
Her hair is piled into a messy bun, and she looks beautiful in a shirt tucked into high-waisted shorts, a Taylor Swift cardigan hanging off one shoulder.
I love that she is here with me every night and every morning.
It feels like we are doing life together.
It might have happened quickly, but I honestly can’t picture my day-to-day life without her being here now.
It feels so natural always being together.
It’s never felt like this with anyone before.
Anya often used to tell me ‘when you know, you know’ and I didn’t understand what she meant by that until now.
I could see what she and Mason had, I yearned for something similar, and now I’m pinching myself because I’m finally experiencing the same thing.
Turning the pan off, I pull out the bacon and begin piling it onto the plate.
‘Thanks for making breakfast,’ she murmurs, eyeing the piles of food I’ve produced. ‘I realise I didn’t eat anything last night. I’m starving.’
‘Lucky there’s plenty here, then. Dig in.’
‘This smells delicious,’ she states. ‘You’re a good cook, Biker Boy.’
‘Not just a pretty face.’ I wink.
The front door swings open, and Mason and Anya appear in their running clothes. Clear sheens of sweat line both their foreheads, and their chests rise and fall.
‘Are you trying to kill me?’ Anya wheezes, glowering at Mason.
‘You were the one who suggested sprints.’ He shrugs.
Anya kicks off her shoes and Mason neatly removes his and automatically tidies hers up.
He can’t help himself. I wonder how many hours he has spent cleaning up after the two of us.
Me more so than Anya. ‘Don’t talk the talk if you can’t walk the walk. ’
‘If I drop dead, tell the world I was trying to keep up with this freak,’ she says dramatically. She perks up as she approaches us, her eyes zeroing in on me. ‘Something smells fantastic.’
‘Eggs and bacon over here,’ I say, pointing to the left. ‘Fruit this side.’
Mason grins at me, impressed. He has always been known as the cook and although he loves it, I think he’s appreciated someone else stepping up and helping out. Anya has tried to learn more about cooking. She’s not too bad, I just like to bully her any chance I get. I call it keeping her humble.
We gather around the table. Nora, Anya and Cami are all meeting up later today.
I’m guessing she is going to fill them in about what happened yesterday.
I still can’t quite believe it. It sounds like the plot of a drama movie, not our reality.
I’m angry that I had to do that stupid extra practice instead of be there for her.
The morning sun streaks across the table. Nora dishes out the plates. Our plates and cups are all mismatched and belong to different sets. They look completely unconventional, but kind of cool at the same time.
Mason makes coffee and brings it to the table, and Anya plops down onto a seat, immediately reaching for the peanut butter.
‘I outran this competitive dude this morning,’ Anya says, looking proud of herself. ‘Absolutely smoked him, and he was on a skateboard!’
‘I’d like to point out the kid was probably eight years old,’ Mason interjects, rolling his eyes.
‘So? Still beat his ass.’
Nora releases an unladylike snort. Mason raises a brow. ‘You also yelled out “take that!” as you went past. His mum was not impressed.’
‘Well, that’s what he gets for trying to race me,’ she huffs.
‘Yeah, you’re real tough, sis,’ I say sarcastically.
Within ten minutes, most of the food has disappeared and the coffee mugs are empty. Anya leans back in her seat, patting her belly.
‘Wow, I think I just ate enough for two. I just put back on anything I lost during that run this morning.’
‘Remind me why you’re suddenly training for a marathon?’ I ask.
‘Maybe because I am.’
‘Wait what?’ I look over at her. ‘Like, a full marathon?’
‘There’s a 15 km race in a few weeks that Mase and I have entered.’
‘That’s awesome!’ Nora says. ‘I tried to start running but realised it’s not for me. I find it so damn hard.’
‘I did, too, but I’m getting better and quicker.’
‘You are,’ Mason agreed. ‘You’re doing great.’
She beams under his praise.
‘Good for you, little sis,’ I say, feeling quite proud of her.
Considering what feels like not too long ago she turned up to my house lost and broken hearted, she has come a long way and it’s so nice seeing her happy.
I’ve enjoyed having her here. I missed her when she was back home and I moved away for university.
We have always been close, and it felt weird not having her and Mason around, since he was off gallivanting around different countries.
Anya glances down at her watch. ‘We better go get ready, Nora.’
‘Copy that,’ she replies.
We all get up and gather everything from the table. Anya and Mason playfully barge us out of the way and begin cleaning up.
‘You’re dismissed,’ Mason says.
‘I’m not gonna complain,’ I reply.
Once we are back in my room, I can’t keep my hands to myself. I pull Nora close to me, my eyes walking down her body.
‘You look beautiful today. Like every other day.’
Not giving her a chance to reply, I dive towards her mouth. I suck on her lower lip, loving the deep moan that leaves her. I’ve learnt that she enjoys it when I do that.
‘You drive me so damn crazy,’ I groan.
She smiles, lips swollen as she gazes up at me. ‘You drive me crazy, too.’
‘I’ve been wanting to be inside you since the moment I saw you this morning,’ I admit in a soft breath between deepening kisses.
‘Oh yeah?’ She smirks. ‘I have to go. Got things to do, people to see …’
‘You mean people to do?’ I suggest. ‘As in, me, right now?’
She giggles and I push her softly back onto the mattress, stepping between her legs.
‘I suppose we can be five minutes late …’ she trails off, running her hands up my chest.
‘Vixen,’ I drawl, pulling her shirt over her head. ‘With the things I have planned for you, it’s going to be a lot longer than five minutes.’
And then my mouth crashes in to hers once more.