Chapter 36 ALEX
WHAT A TOTAL BUST, I thought as I sat, nursing a well-needed whisky, not for Child Protection UK, who’d had a bumper night fundraising, but for me and Nancy. Everything that could have gone wrong did, almost as if it were designed that way.
I checked my watch again, an unsettled feeling sitting heavy that wasn’t indigestion from the rich coq au vin. Where is she? Perhaps she’d left the ballroom because she felt sick and holed herself up in a cubicle. I rubbed the burn in my chest and left the rest of the glass on the bar.
A group of women were exiting the ladies’ when I reached the hall.
I enquired if they’d seen Nancy, but they shook their heads.
I pushed the door ajar and saw a Hispanic woman sitting on a stool by the hand towels, holding back tears.
I tentatively asked if she’d seen a woman of Nancy’s description.
“No he visto nada!”
I nodded, getting the gist, and popped a twenty in her bowl as my heart began to pound like a boxer on a speed bag.
I rushed back through each room, scanning for Nancy in case we’d missed each other, but I couldn’t find her.
I called her phone, but it went straight to voicemail.
I left a panicked message asking her to call me back.
Then I checked her phone’s location. It showed her outside the hotel on Park Lane.
I hurried through the foyer, stopping briefly at the cloakroom. The attendant took the ticket disinterestedly and returned with my overcoat. “Have you seen a woman pass by? Five-three, with an afro, wearing a long red dress?”
I watched the young man’s expression shift from indifference to displeasure. “Yeah, I saw her. She was crying. She collected her wrap and left.”
“How long ago?”
The attendant scrutinised me but said nothing.
I lost my temper. “What do you want, a fucking bribe?”
“No wonder she left you,” he muttered with disgust.
My knuckles cracked, but I restrained myself. I had to find her. I dashed out the entrance, aware of the attendant’s gaze impaling me from behind, and followed the GPS to a bus stop. Several people were waiting, but no Nancy. She must have turned her phone off here.
I examined the route maps of the various services on the display board (something I’d never had cause to do before) and found three went through Chelsea, stopping close to World’s End.
Before my thoughts were collected, I was running full pelt down Park Lane, hunting for the amber light of an available black cab.
The first five I passed were taken, but I spotted a free ride near Hyde Park Corner and ran to the window.
“Can you take me to World’s End Estate?”
The cabbie looked at my tuxedo and dickie bow. “Course, but you do know where that is, right?”
“Yes, yes, as quickly as you can,” I clipped, already climbing into the back.
As it was past midnight, the streets were chaotic, filled with Londoners returning home from their Friday evening.
The cab crept around Belgravia traffic, turning onto King’s Road.
I wound down the window, checking every double-decker we passed, but they were so packed there was little likelihood of spotting Nancy.
I only hoped that I could beat her home.
Whatever had upset her must have been dire for her to run off without a word.
It was a concerning trait that we needed to address. It petrified me when she ran.
The cab pulled up outside the red brick tower, and I paid the fare.
“Watch it around here, yeah?” the cabbie warned before screeching away.
I looked around, hoping to spot Nancy walking back from the surrounding streets, but she was nowhere to be seen.
I ran to the lifts, passing a group of teenagers who eyed me coolly.
The lights were on in Tracy’s flat, the front of which, I was relieved to see, bore no mark of the horrific vandalism from the night before.
I rang the video doorbell Evan had installed.
After a minute, I heard the safety chain being fixed to the door.
The latch turned, and Tracy peered out, her expression shadowed. “Alex.”
“Tracy, is Nancy here?”
“Yeah, and she’s very upset.”
I placed a hand on the door. “Let me in. I need to talk to her.”
“You’re not coming in.”
“Why not?”
Tracy held her ground, her voice remaining icy calm.
“First off, I’ve just got her in bed and settled.
She needs to rest. Second, despite saying nothing about what happened, she was clear she didn’t want to see you.
She said you’d come, but I shouldn’t let you in under any circumstances.
” Her eyes narrowed. “Why would she say that to me?”
I realised the cheerful woman I’d got to know over the last two weeks was now a wary and protective mother. Stepping back, I tried to compose myself. “I don’t know. That’s what I need to find out. Something happened this evening.”
“But she was with you the whole time.” Tracy’s temper rose. “Since you found her last night after some bastard spray-painted abuse about her right on this door. How can you not know if she was with you? What happened?”
“We got separated at the gala, but she was safe and with my family. It’s a classy event; there wouldn’t have been any trouble.”
“Oh really?” Tracy scoffed. “You’ve never been a cleaner ’round Westminster, have you? I can tell you firsthand there’re entitled men all over this city. It doesn’t matter how much is in their bank account.”
“What are you implying?”
“I’m implying that if I find out you hurt my little girl, I’ll hunt you down and—”
“I would never hurt her. She’s everything to me!”
Tracy raised her hand. “I’m gonna wait and find out what Nancy has to say after she’s slept and recovered, and I don’t want to see you here again until she invites you. Do you understand?”
“Tracy, this is ridiculous!” I lunged forward. “I haven’t done anything! I only want to know she’s okay!”
Her eyes became slits. “You never raise your voice to me, you hear? And in answer to your question, no, she isn’t okay. Now. Go. Home.”
My blood pumped hot in my neck. Fear mixed with fury.
I knew I had the strength to kick the door free from the chain and force myself in, and the brute within, fuelled by anger and possessiveness, seriously thought about it, but reason and honour won out.
I stepped back and drew a deep, shaky breath.
“Goodnight, Tracy. I’m glad Nancy’s safe with you.
” Then I turned for the stairs, hearing the latch click behind me.
I walked along the Thames away from the city, as rain began pattering down in large, wet droplets, slowly soaking through my overcoat down to my Oxfords.
The uncomfortable feeling was welcome and matched my dark mood.
I put one wet foot in front of the other and ran back through the evening, trying to figure out what the hell had happened.
Nancy’s nerves were palpable at the start of the night, but she seemed okay when we spoke to the ‘pair of jeans’, even though they were a deathly bore.
My previous girlfriends would have been happy to hang off my arm like an ornament as I conducted business, but Nancy must have been bored senseless.
I hadn’t realised how long we’d prattled on until I turned to find her gone.
Concerned, I’d excused myself to check the bar, narrowly avoiding a run-in with the dreadful ‘twit twins’.
After a frustrating search, I found Nancy chatting with Mother, whom William had already introduced.
That got my back up. William knew I’d wanted to handle her carefully when presenting Nancy, given the state she was often in these days.
It wasn’t his place…especially when they looked so stunning next to one another.
I’d been petty because of it, ordering William to remove his arm.
But things had calmed down after, and Nancy seemed in good spirits.
She’d kissed me so passionately after my speech, I was lost for words.
Then dinner was served, and Catherine and Mother drew me into a ‘chat’ that swiftly became an interrogation about Nancy and Mimi.
As dinner drew on, Catherine became spiteful as she often did after a few drinks, and I decided it was best for us to leave, but I found Nancy had gone off with William once again.
The invasive questioning, alongside my proprietorial streak, had me raging with jealousy as he enjoyed Nancy’s company in my absence.
Seeing them laughing in each other’s arms, William taking their picture in the casino—where I had wanted to take her after this awful week—sent me over the edge.
I’d never blown up at him like that, and the memory left me ashamed.
William may not have borne my burdens as heir, but I’d never felt bitter about it like Father and Uncle George.
Our companionship through a rough childhood had kept us afloat, and god knew William had his own demons to live with.
I was his big brother, the one who always had his back.
Yet I’d treated him like a competitor. It was below the belt.
As the rain drummed the river beside the gloomy path, I thought back to the ballroom where the night had started and ended.
I’d asked Nancy to dance before we left.
It was silly, perhaps, but I adored dancing with her.
Face to face, body to body. It would always be the precursor to our first time together—to the first time I had trusted someone enough to leave myself open and vulnerable.
But as we danced, Nancy changed in front of me.
She was distracted, looking around at the drunken trust fund pillocks who had little respect for anything.
Perhaps that had upset her. I had to admit that high society could be boorish and arrogant.
It was why I stayed away from most of the events I was invited to.
But the Child Protection gala was different. It was personal.
Even so, Nancy wasn’t crying when she left the ballroom.
Her distress happened after she went to the ladies’…
Dear god, I thought, was Tracy right? Was Nancy assaulted?
Was that why she was in such a state? Did someone touch her—hurt her?
I wavered, as the rain beat my face, replacing the tears I’d never managed to shed.
Go on, cry, you pathetic coward, my father sneered.
My hands fisted at my sides. I wanted to return to the flat that moment and extract the beast’s name so I could unleash every violence on him. But Tracy’s words ricocheted around my head.
She said you’d come, but I shouldn’t let you in under any circumstances.
Whatever happened to Nancy at the gala, she blamed me. Was it someone I knew who’d assaulted her? Or was it because I hadn’t been there when she needed me most? Was it because I’d led her right into danger?
Since the press had been so ruthless, I’d decided it was best Nancy didn’t attend, but when Mimi had goaded me after dinner, I’d snapped.
There was no way I was hiding our relationship any longer.
The world needed to accept it! Yet my change of heart had put her directly in harm’s way.
It was my job to protect her—my duty. Whatever happened to her in that bathroom was my fault.
I’d failed Nancy just hours after she’d handed me her trust. It was unforgivable.
I lifted my head, cursing my misjudgement, and realised I’d reached another bridge. With no idea how long I’d been walking westward, I climbed to the road and found I’d reached Kew. I knelt against a stone wall, feeling exhausted, and let my head fall into my hands.
A couple with a raised umbrella bustled by in the dull lamplight, dropping a coin at my feet. It jingled on the ground, the King’s stately profile shining up at me. My back straightened.
“Sir? Are you ready to leave?” I looked up to see Evan staring back at me through the car window.
Much to his surprise, I rose and sat soaking beside him rather than in the back. “Yes, home, Evan. I’ve royally cocked up.”
“Sir, if you don’t mind me enquiring, is Ms Cooper well?”
“She’s safe. I don’t know if she’s well, but I’ll make it right no matter what it takes.” I looked over at Evan. “You like her, don’t you?”
Evan’s eyes remained fixed on the road. “I do, sir; she’s got class. Much like you, Lord Toverton.”
I paused, taking in the rare moment of sentiment from my otherwise reticent bodyguard. “Thank you, Evan. That means a lot. Now, I need to prove it.”
“Very good, sir.”