Chapter 2 #2
“Two days ago,” I whispered, startled that I’d even spoken a word.
Bodhi cursed again. “With the way that your eyes are tracking, Kiera, I think you need to see a doctor.”
I closed my mouth, my heart racing. No. Someone would find out. They always found out.
His hold tightened a fraction before relaxing. Why did that calm me? “You don’t have to leave. You can stay. Okay? I’m not going to make you leave. I think you have a concussion. Which is why you’re tracking so slowly.”
“I’m fine.”
“Just don’t lie to me. Okay? You can say what you need to, you can yell at me, curse at me, but don’t lie.”
Tears threatened, and I had no idea why. I didn’t know this man. All I wanted to do was hide underneath that blanket, and yet I knew it wasn’t going to help. “I think it’s a mild concussion. I still drove here.”
“And that was stupid.” The words sounded as if they had been wrenched from his throat.
Anger that I hadn’t felt in far too long surged forth, and I pulled my chin back from his hold. “It was what I needed to do. Teagan said I could stay here for a week, but I’m sorry for stepping onto your property. I didn’t know that you didn’t know.”
“Teagan left me a voicemail, and I should have listened to it. I don’t care that you’re here. Now that I know. I’m going to get Kellan to come up here, though. Okay? I know he’s not working, and probably with the kids, but you need to see someone.”
With the way that he choked on the word kids, I had to wonder if maybe Bodhi didn’t even like them. But then again, it wasn’t my place to ask. Or deal with.
I just wanted to go home.
And I kept telling myself that, even though I knew I didn’t have one. This was a mess of my own making, and I needed to figure out how to fix it. Yet, in that moment, not having to do it alone felt like a miracle.
That’s how I knew I needed to take a step back.
“Don’t go.”
“I don’t want to take your time. Or your friend’s time.”
“You asked Teagan to stay…that means you reached out for help. So just stay. I don’t use this cabin anyway. Rest, breathe, and maybe tell me what the fuck happened.”
I once again flinched at his tone, but it didn’t scare me this time. It was just a little shocking. I cursed more than anyone that I knew, and yet hearing Bodhi continually doing so while so close to my face felt almost protective. That concussion must have hit harder than I thought.
“Okay. I just…don’t know what needs to happen next. And I hate not knowing what to do.”
“In that part we’re alike. I’ll get Kellan up here to check you out. He’s a friend. And our town doctor. Meaning anything you say will stay with him.” He paused. “Just tell me what happened.”
“I just made a mistake.”
“Don’t. You don’t get to put this on you. Because I’m pretty sure you didn’t beat the shit out of yourself.”
My mouth dropped, eyes widened. “Seriously? Who taught you bedside manners?”
Bodhi looked at me then, before he laughed, though there wasn’t much humor in it.
“If you only knew, girl.”
“I’m not that much younger than you, Bodhi. You don’t get to play the old man card.”
“I don’t think you know exactly how old I am,” he growled before shaking his head. “Just let me know one thing.”
I met his gaze, knowing I had to be grateful, yet terrified of what he would ask. “Okay.”
“Are you safe here? Will whoever did this follow you here?”
I held my breath, trying to formulate an answer, before my shoulders finally sagged. “I don’t know. I don’t think he’ll follow me here.”
“Who is he?”
I swallowed hard, and I looked down at my hands. “My ex. Jeremiah. We broke up over a year ago, but he didn’t really believe me.”
“I take it Teagan gave you the security code?” he asked after a few moments of silence, and I looked up at him, surprised that was what he had said of all things.
“Yes.”
“Okay, then. Keep the alarm going, and I have cameras all over the property.”
“Then how did you not know I was here?” I asked, confused.
He ran his hand through his hair, his biceps flexing as he did so. “Because Teagan must have given you the main security code, that wouldn’t alert me completely. I’m going to have to have a talk with my sister about that.”
“Don’t be mad at her. I asked for help, and she gave it, and I’m sorry.”
“I’m not mad at her, Kiera,” Bodhi whispered, his voice so kind that it made me want to cry.
“You sure sound like it.”
“I’m always angry, so I always sound like it,” he said honestly, and that confused me even more. “You’ll be safe here. Safe as I can make it.”
“Thank you.” I paused. “I don’t like asking for help.”
“You’re not the only one. But just breathe for a minute. Okay? That’s all I can do for now.”
“Thank you,” I murmured.
“Don’t thank me. Now put this ice on your face, and I’m going to go make you something to eat.
You’re far too pale.” He studied my face a little bit longer before pulling out his phone and heading toward the other end of the kitchen.
He pulled out a pan, and then bread and cheese from the fridge, and I had to wonder if he had known that was there, or if he had just guessed that Teagan would’ve filled up the fridge with a few things.
I did not understand the Ashfords. I never had.
But Bodhi? He confused me more than the rest. I watched as he moved around the kitchen with such efficiency that it surprised me.
He pulled up his sleeves, and I saw the ink there, as well as the burn scars.
So many burns. I held back a gasp, wondering why I truly couldn’t notice them before.
Then again, he always wore long Henleys or flannels when I was around.
But this was the first time I’d seen him in a warm environment.
Whatever had happened to him must have hurt because his burn scars were thick and yet fully healed.
I wanted to reach out, just to make sure he was okay, but that was stupid. So stupid. I wasn’t a safe space, and it was just now dawning on me that perhaps I never had been. And it scared me that perhaps Bodhi had never been able to have a space of his own.
And for some reason, the idea that this grumpy, asshole of a man wanted to keep me safe without saying the words let me relax for the first time in too long.
I wouldn’t stay in Ashford Creek for long. I couldn’t. It wouldn’t be safe for long, and I needed to face the real world soon. The paparazzi would find me. They always did. And when that time came, the world would know that I had failed.
That I was weak.
That I was exactly what they had called me when I had first joined the band.
A female drummer. A girl.
With the wrong voice.
And then Bodhi Ashford put a grilled cheese with tomato in front of me, and an ice water, and didn’t say a word. He just glared at me until I picked up the sandwich with one hand and took a bite.
Flavor burst on my tongue, and for some reason, in that moment, I finally felt safe to do the one thing I hadn’t. Tears fell once again, my shoulders shook, and Bodhi just stood there, staring at me, arms folded over his chest, and glared.
I let myself cry.
Because in that moment. I was safe.