Chapter 3 #2
“Well, look at you,” a sly voice whispered from my side.
I turned to see Nathan and shifted my head. “I don’t want any trouble today. I’m not in the mood.”
And I needed to get back to Kiera. I didn’t have enough food for her, and there was no way that I was letting her come into town.
At least not yet. Honestly, with Briar and Gabriel here, the town would be able to focus on their celebrity and then turn ranks so they could protect them from any onlookers.
Maybe they’d figure out how to do so for Kiera, but she didn’t need the attention of paparazzi or the public.
Not on everything she had done. Not on everything else that was happening to her at the moment.
“Hey, asshole. Did you hear me?”
I turned and frowned at Nathan. “It didn’t seem like you had much to say. At least nothing worthwhile. Didn’t feel like answering.”
The dumbass glared at me, but immediately stopped when not only Jessup, but his two sons stood behind the counter, tapping their fingers on the granite.
I didn’t like being taken care of like this or having backups that could get hurt. But my brothers and best friends would always do the same for me, even on my darkest days. And sometimes I needed to remember that.
Without another word, I paid and pushed past Nathan.
The man didn’t move a step. Instead, creating a wall that I had effectively smashed into. And when Nathan shoved his shoulder into mine, I ignored it.
I moved two steps toward the door, and then Nathan was on me, pulling at my shoulder. “Fuck you. We know you’re a murderer. You had to have something to do with it. How dare you walk around town without shame? You let Courtney die.”
Anger wrapped with shame as I sucked in a breath. “You’re going to want to keep your hands off of me and my wife’s name from your mouth.”
“You didn’t deserve Courtney. You never did.” He shoved me, putting two punches to my kidneys, and I let out a grunt. I shouldn’t have turned my back to him but honestly, I hadn’t thought he’d hit me. That was my mistake.
I whirled, dropping my bag of tools, and without thinking, let my fist smash into Nathan’s face.
Nathan whirled back, and I kept going, soul-tired, weary, and exhausted from trying to be a better person.
I was tired of holding back, of not fighting.
I was tired of letting Nathan and his ilk take the lead because I was the one who tried to have the upper hand.
Well fuck that. I moved forward again, even as Nathan took a swing. I ducked it, and went to punch back, when somebody held me. One of the sons restrained Nathan, too, and I looked over my shoulder to see it was Thatcher gripping my shoulders, throwing a muscled arm over my chest.
My friend. The man who hated himself as much as he thought I hated him. How could I hate him when I could only hate myself?
My friend let out a deep breath. “Don’t do this. You know he’ll sue.”
“I don’t really fucking care right now,” I growled, hands shaking.
Thatcher pulled me farther from him, even as Nathan began to cry out, words and threats that had no meaning anymore.
I pushed Thatcher slightly, turning away.
He just stared at me as if I had kicked him in the gut, and I despised myself.
Because I didn’t blame Thatcher for anything.
I couldn’t. But a small part of me wanted to.
For him being too late. And for me not being enough.
“I’m fine.” A lie. Always a lie.
“One day I’ll hold him down for you,” Thatcher said honestly. “But not here. Not today. You know better than that, Bodhi.”
And I wanted my lips to tilt up, but instead I shook my head. “Don’t bother.”
Thatcher sighed, and I moved away, ignoring the crowd that we had amassed in that short period of time.
I tossed my bag into the truck, and then walked to the grocery store, ignoring the whispers, the stares. I shouldn’t have punched Nathan. I should have let him take me, do what he wanted. And then people would stop talking. Though I knew that was a lie too.
With a sigh, I picked up a few things that Kiera might like, although I didn’t know her enough to figure it out. And then I made my way back to my truck, knowing I was done with town for a while. Frankly, I had been here for too long as it was.
Nobody said Courtney’s name anymore. My hands tightened on the steering wheel, and I swallowed back the bile that threatened.
Nobody said my wife’s name. I didn’t even anymore.
Back when we had been in high school, Courtney had been everything.
She had just been Court. A blonde hair, blue-eyed beauty who had somehow let me love her.
It had made no sense to me. How could she love a dumb jock and jerk like me?
But she had. And we’d had the perfect family.
In middle school and high school, however, Nathan had such a crush on Court.
That had been awkward to say the least. Court and I had dated for all four years of high school, and every prom Nathan would ask her out.
And I had been forced to be the bigger man by not punching his lights out.
Court had wanted to handle it, so I had let her. Because I loved her.
And Nathan had never understood that. He called me weak even though he was the one who was trying to steal my girl. He was just lucky I had only knocked him out once.
Maybe twice.
Of course, Callum had taken care of the third time, but that was for another reason.
With a sigh, I pulled onto my property, went through all the alarms and locks, and parked in front of my house.
I pulled out all three bags, set one of them in my workshop, that I’d deal with later, and then went to the cabin.
I knocked on the door, noticing the lights were on, but couldn’t hear music—thank God.
When Kiera opened the door, I swallowed hard, wondering what the hell I was doing. She wore another sundress, her hair flowing in waves around her face, her bare face at that, and other than the piercings and tattoos, wore nothing else.
I could see every bruise, every cut, and I wanted to find that man and end him.
But then I would just be the monster they said I was.
“Here,” I said, handing over two bags.
She blinked at me and then smiled softly before taking them.
“Thank you. Though I don’t know what to do with the fact that you continue to take care of me. I was going to ask if I could order something for delivery, but then I didn’t know if you do that. And well…I’ll just thank you.”
“I can get some things delivered out here, but not everything. You got everything else you need?” I asked, my voice rough.
I did not want this woman. And yet when she bent down ever so slightly to set something down, my dick noticed, and I cursed myself.
After so many years, you would think I would have figured out how to ignore a woman like this, and yet, I couldn’t. Not with her.
What the hell was wrong with me?
“How much do I owe you?”
“Don’t do that,” I snapped.
“What?”
“Just rest. Heal. Do whatever the fuck you want. But you’re not going to pay for anything.”
Her eyes widened. “What’s the matter?” she asked, and then her gaze went to my hand, and my knuckles that weren’t bloody, but marked ever so slightly. “Bodhi. What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
“Don’t lie. Please, please just don’t lie.”
“Nothing you need to be concerned about. Everything’s fine. Just let me know if you need anything else.”
“I need you to tell me what’s wrong.” She met my gaze then, her chin raised. So defiant. That fire that had been missing these past couple of days.
“That I can’t give you.” And so much more. And with that, I turned on my heel and closed the door, hoping like hell she locked it behind me. I worked in my workshop until I tired myself out, thinking about what I would do.
I did not want Kiera West. There was no way that my body would want her. I refused to be with anyone. That was my penance.
But the part of me that I had long since buried, the part of me that cared about anyone, wanted to see Kiera smile again.