Chapter Fourteen #2
I manage a weak smile. "Giving orders to death now, are we? Bold strategy."
The fever spikes again, shadows writhing across my skin. Through the pain, I'm vaguely aware of Nesilhan's voice, not cold or distant as usual, but urgent, almost pleading as she works to counter the curse.
When I wake again, the room is bathed in soft dawn light, and my mind is clearer than it has been in days. The fever has broken completely, leaving behind a bone-deep weariness but blessedly little pain. My shadows respond normally to my thoughts, sliding along the walls in familiar patterns.
Nesilhan is asleep in the chair beside my bed, her body curled into an uncomfortable position that cannot possibly be restful. I find myself watching the steady rise and fall of her chest, a strange tightness in my own at the realization that she truly has not left my side throughout this ordeal.
As if sensing my attention, her eyes flutter open, immediately alert despite her exhaustion. She straightens, pushing hair from her face in a gesture that's oddly endearing.
"You're not dead," she observes, her voice rough with sleep.
"Keen observation," I reply. "Your healing skills are clearly matched by your perceptiveness."
She ignores my sarcasm, leaning forward to press her palm to my forehead. The touch is clinical but not cold. "The fever's gone. How do you feel?"
"Like I've been trampled by a herd of shadow beasts, but otherwise remarkably alive." I sit up, pleased to find that the room remains stationary rather than spinning wildly. "Your potions worked."
As I move to stand, testing my strength, a glimmer of silver light catches my attention from the corner of the room. At first, I think it's a trick of the morning sun on glass, but then it moves—a distinctly humanoid shape that flickers in and out of visibility .
"What is that?" I demand, shadows instinctively gathering despite my weakness.
She follows my gaze, her face draining of color when she sees what I'm looking at. "What is what?"
"Don't play innocent," I growl, squinting at the shimmering figure that's becoming more distinct by the second. "That... thing in the corner."
"He can see me," a female voice announces with cheerful curiosity. "How fascinating! The curse temporarily opened his perception to see beings from other realms, but when it fully clears, so will those memories."
The figure materializes fully—a small woman with wildly shifting silver-blonde hair and oversized eyes that gleam with mischief. Translucent wings shimmer behind her, casting prismatic patterns on the wall where they catch the light.
"Banu!" Nesilhan hisses, panic evident in her voice. "What are you doing here?"
"Checking on you, obviously," the woman—Banu—replies with a dismissive wave.
Her presence filling the room despite her smaller stature.
"You've been here for days. I was starting to think you'd eloped with Shadow Boy here and were enjoying a very extended honeymoon.
All those moans coming from this room... "
She winks suggestively.
"He can see you," Nesilhan repeats, making frantic shooing motions. "He shouldn't be able to see you!"
"Oh, that." Banu steps closer, examining me with unabashed interest. "Shadow magic.
Opens the perception. Temporary side effect.
" She circles me with graceful steps, then flicks my ear painfully.
"My, he's even prettier up close. I can see why you've been so distracted lately, Nesi. Those cheekbones could cut glass."
Despite my weakness, I find myself oddly energized by this surreal conversation. "Thanks," I say dryly, hoping she will be invisible again. "I'm also charming and incredibly powerful, when not recently cursed. Would you like to find out what my shadows can do to fairy wings?"
"Ooh, threatening me already!" Banu cackles, darting just out of reach.
"Charming indeed. Tell me, Shadow Boy, is it true what they say about men with big shadow magic?
That it's all compensating for... smaller attributes?
" She makes a measuring gesture with her thumb and forefinger, barely an inch apart.
Nesilhan makes a strangled noise. "Banu, I swear—"
"What?" Banu asks innocently. "I'm only getting to know your husband. After all, if you're going to be riding his—"
"He's not supposed to see you!" Nesilhan cuts her off, cheeks flaming. "The blood bond—"
"Relax," Banu interrupts. "He won't remember any of this anyway.
The fever and the curse will wipe his memory of anything.
.. unusual." She turns to me with a wicked grin.
"That means me, by the way. I'm the unusual thing.
Though from what I've observed, you're into some pretty unusual things yourself, Shadow Boy.
Those shadows of yours get very... creative in the bedroom, don't they? "
"Depends on my partner," I reply, recovering enough to play along. "Care for a demonstration? I've always wondered if fairies taste like honey or more like those annoying little insects they resemble."
"In your dreams, Shadow Boy," Banu snorts.
"Though I'm flattered by your interest, my tastes run more toward beings who don't brood constantly and kill people for fun.
Besides, your wife here would get jealous, and trust me—you don't want to see her jealous.
Remember that maid who flirted with her first boyfriend? Still missing three fingers."
"Banu!" Nesilhan looks ready to combust.
"I'd like to know," I interrupt, genuinely amused despite my exhaustion, "If Nesilhan always talks to thin air, or if I'm witnessing a special occasion."
Banu cackles. "Oh, constantly. Long, detailed conversations.
Sometimes she argues with you. She makes a terrible impression, by the way.
" The fairy deepens her voice comically.
"'I am Kaan, I brood magnificently and make poor life choices!
Worship my mighty shadows while I dramatically sweep my cape and glower seductively! '"
Nesilhan makes a strangled noise.
"That's actually not bad," I admit, grinning. "Though I prefer to think of myself as contemplative rather than brooding. And my cape-sweeping is an art form, thank you very much."
"She also practices other things," Banu continues wickedly. "Like what she'd like to do to you in bed—both the murdering kind and the considerably more entertaining kind. She's quite creative with those light daggers of hers. Did you know they can be shaped into—"
"That's enough!" Nesilhan lunges for the fairy, who darts easily out of reach.
"Fine, fine. I'll behave." Banu stands closer to the bedpost. "You're no fun when you're worried. Though I must say, your concern for the big, bad Shadow Boy is adorable. 'Oh, please don't die, Kaan. Who would I stare longingly at during council meetings?'"
"I'm not worried," Nesilhan says automatically.
"Please," Banu scoffs. "You haven't slept properly in six days, and you've been mixing potions until your fingers are raw.
If that's not worry, I don't know what is.
" She leans toward me conspiratorially. "She threw a water pitcher at Emir when he tried to bring in the court healers.
It was magnificent. Hit him right in the… "
"Six days?" I interrupt, looking at Nesilhan with newfound appreciation. "You've been fighting this curse for six days?"
She avoids my gaze. "As I said before, self-preservation."
"So you claim," I reply softly. "Yet there was nothing self- preserving about keeping my shadow lords away. If anything, their power might have eased your burden."
"Or killed us both if their magic triggered a reaction with the curse," she counters, but there's a flush creeping up her neck that suggests there might be more to it.
Banu makes an exaggerated gagging noise.
"And that's my cue to leave before this gets sickeningly sweet.
You two and your mutual denial is exhausting.
" She walks closer to Nesilhan's shoulder and whispers loudly enough for me to hear: "Remember what I told you about the potion.
You've only got three days before it wears off completely, and his pretty head will be all up in your thoughts again. "
Nesilhan tenses, glancing at me with something like panic. Interesting. Very interesting.
"Goodbye, Shadow Boy," Banu calls, fluttering toward the wall. "Try not to die. Nesil would be terribly put out, and she's already a nightmare when she's grumpy. Though between us, I think you'd find her even more attractive when she's stabbing you. You have that look about you."
With that, the fairy zips across the room and disappears through what appears to be a solid wall.
"So," I say into the silence that follows, "do I have a fever-induced hallucination to thank for the most entertainment I've had in days, or did I just meet your fairy friend?"
Nesilhan sighs deeply, her fingers twisting the ring on her forefinger that she has worn since she arrived at my court. When she becomes aware of what she is doing, she stops. "Banu was right about one thing. You won't remember any of this tomorrow."
"That seems convenient," I observe, though I can already feel a strange haziness creeping back into my thoughts, the brief clarity fading.
"Though it is a shame. I quite like her.
Almost as much as I like the idea of you practicing arguments with me when I am not around.
" I lean forward slightly, enjoying the way her breath catches.
"And what is that about longing stares in council meetings? "
"You're still delirious," she says firmly, but the flush spreading across her cheeks tells a different story.
The room begins to spin again, and I make my way back to the bed just as I find it increasingly difficult to keep my eyes open. The last thing I see before darkness claims me is Nesilhan's face, worry and something softer mingling in her expression.
My last conscious thought is that I hope I will remember this—not the pain or the shadows, but Nesilhan's unwavering presence and the strange, wonderful moment when the veil between worlds has thinned enough for me to glimpse something magical.
As consciousness slips away, I think I hear Nesilhan's voice, unexpectedly gentle: "Rest now. I'll be here when you wake."
And for once in my life, I believe a promise.