The Hunter
My eyes narrowed at the princess, every alarm bell ringing through my body. “How much blood loss?”
Her face twisted in an apologetic grimace, and that was all I needed to know.
I sighed, running a hand down my face. “How do you know this? Tell me specifics.”
“I was watching from the hall when Calista was raging to our captain of the guards that a commander wasn’t answering her summons,” Eira said, wringing her hands together.
“She ordered the guards to find him at any cost. Turned out, he was in the infirmary. He had been attacked by a gang of bandits, and they’d cut off his arm. He died later that day.”
Perfect. So the only successful instance of resisting Calista’s power had been enough blood loss to kill a man. I swallowed hard, my mind straining to find a solution to this that didn’t involve me dying.
A necromancer holds the threads of life in their hands, whether it’s to preserve a life or to end it.
Lavinia’s words rang in my head. Though I loathed the healer for her betrayal, I knew she’d spoken the truth.
I had the power of life and death in my hands.
But my magic was still new to me. I couldn’t even wield it properly when I was at full strength, let alone suffering from blood loss. How could I be certain I could survive?
Eira crossed her arms over her chest. “I see that calculating mind of yours working hard. What are you thinking right now?”
I huffed a dry laugh. “I’m thinking I’m either going to die from blood loss or from the fae bargain claiming me. The odds are pretty bleak.”
Eira placed a hand on my arm, her blue eyes earnest. “I’ll keep you alive as best I can. We can take this slow. A little blood at a time. I’m sure that every drop you lose weakens her power bit by bit.”
My nostrils flared, agitation rising up inside me. I was so damn helpless. I was a liability, and I would be slowing Eira down. She had plans to put in motion, and now I was standing in the way. My chest tightened with apprehension. “Eira, if I’m injured, I can’t protect you.”
She blinked, her expression startled. “You don’t need to. Our bargain only stated you couldn’t harm me.”
I made a noise of frustration and placed my hands on her waist, pulling her closer.
Her eyes widened slightly. “I don’t think you understand,” I said in a low voice.
“I don’t care what Calista has ordered me to do.
I can’t see you hurt. It would be far worse for me to have to watch you suffer than to endure whatever horrors Calista has in store for me. ”
Eira’s breath hitched, and she moistened her lips. My gaze darted down to her mouth—a mouth I knew tasted as soft and smooth as rose petals. “I—I don’t think you mean that.”
My brows knitted together. “Why not?”
She gave a short exhale, her expression full of incredulity. She let a hand fall on her thigh. “Are you serious? You called me delusional earlier. Forgive me for not believing that you care about me all that much.”
My eyes closed as shame crept into my chest. She was right. She had every reason to despise me. Hell, I even despised myself. A lump formed in my throat, and I found it difficult to swallow. “I… regret the words I said to you earlier,” I said in a strained voice. “I’m sorry.”
“Does that mean you believe me now?”
A dull throb began to pound through my skull, making it hard to concentrate. Blood and ice, I couldn’t think right now. I couldn’t find the right words to say. Anytime I spoke, I only made things worse.
All I did was hurt her over and over again. It was all I was capable of doing.
Pain. My job, my life, was only meant to inflict pain.
I inhaled deeply, my insides quivering from the intensity of my thoughts. I had to make her understand that I was on her side… but I was also conflicted. About my life. My purpose. Everything.
Slowly, my eyes opened to find hers full of hope and vulnerability. She was worried I would dismiss her claims again and call her insane.
Delusional. I’d actually said that.
I was such an asshole.
“I don’t know,” I said at last. When her expression fell, I slid my knuckle under her chin, forcing her to meet my eyes. “Please let me finish.”
She took a shuddering breath and nodded, urging me to continue.
“You have to understand that I’ve been working for Calista for over a decade.
That’s more than ten years of my life I’ve devoted to killing in her name.
For the good of our court. For the good of my people.
Or… so I thought.” My hands began to shake, so I dropped my arms to my sides, clutching my fingers into tight fists.
“If what you say is true, then that means that everything I’ve done, all the lives I’ve taken…
the blood that’s on my hands, it… it…” I broke off with an anguished groan, running my hands through my hair.
My head was spinning. My thoughts were flitting about so quickly I couldn’t make sense of them.
Calista, a Demon Fae.
Could Eira’s claim be true? If it was… Gods, it would change everything.
Every contract. Every mission. Every bargain.
A lie. A deception.
All those people I killed. All those lives I ruined.
It was all for nothing. A waste. An abomination.
I was a cold-blooded killer. Not for the good of my court, but for a pretender who didn’t belong on the throne.
For someone who used me as her puppet to eliminate threats to her rule.
I had always disliked the way Calista had ruled, but I had never considered it my place to question it.
I had somehow convinced myself that it was for the best.
I sagged backward against the brick wall, my chest wound up so tightly that I couldn’t breathe. Eira’s warm hands pressed against my cheeks. I stared down at her, struggling to see straight, to think clearly…
Then, those ice-blue eyes were holding mine. Grounding me. Anchoring me. Keeping me still. I gazed into them, drowning in them, and my heart rate slowed. The raging inferno of my thoughts quieted. There was only her and those frosty eyes. Eyes I would gladly fall into and never come out of.
My breathing reached a steady, even pace. Her gaze continued to pin me in place.
When all was quiet within me, I said softly, “It is easier for me to dismiss your claim because then it won’t completely unravel my life and my past sins.
Even if, deep down, I know what you say is the truth, right now…
I can’t accept it. Not yet. Not until my mind—my heart—can fully process the crimes I have committed on behalf of an imposter.
” My voice broke on the last sentence, and the lump in my throat tightened.
My eyes stung, and my chest constricted again.
But I forced myself to look into the icy depths of those eyes, to let her soothe the heat roiling in my gut. I didn’t deserve it. But I was still grateful for it.
I hadn’t realized a tear had streaked down my cheek until Eira caught it with her thumb and smoothed it away.
Her own eyes were moist as she said to me, “I understand. But you aren’t a monster, Theron.
I never thought you were. And even if you do accept my truth, it doesn’t make you evil for what you did. You were only trying to free yourself.”
I shook my head and sniffed, dropping my gaze. “It’s not good enough.”
For years, I had only thought of myself and my freedom. Meanwhile, humans like Eira, along with the unseelie, were being persecuted and hunted on Calista’s orders.
I had known about their suffering. And I’d done nothing.
I might not have had a choice in my assignments. But I was still afforded freedoms. As a member of the court, there were ways I could have helped. I could have quietly defied Calista, finding ways around our bargains.
I could have done so much more.
A sudden, searing pain shot through my head, setting me ablaze. Fire burned in my veins. I crumpled, and Eira and the alley disappeared from view. Blackness swallowed me whole as Calista’s face appeared in my mind.
Kill her, she commanded. You must kill the princess.
“Eira,” I groaned, my voice sounding far away. I was fading. Soon, Calista would claim me. But I had one ounce of clarity left. I had to make it count. “Eira, cut me.”