Chapter 35
Jealousy and Revelations
K aan
An hour later, we're safely ensconced in a private dining chamber, far from prying demonic eyes and Erlik's twisted hospitality. The room is surprisingly pleasant—warm stone walls, flickering candles, and furniture that doesn't appear to be made from the bones of the damned.
Demon servants glide in with platters of food that actually look normal—roasted meat, fresh bread, fruits that aren't screaming when you bite them. The wine they pour is deep red and smells like it came from actual grapes rather than liquefied emotions.
"Finally," Banu sighs, slumping into her chair with obvious relief. "Though after watching demons play 'creative soul destruction,' I'm not sure I can stomach anything. Even bread feels morally questionable right now."
Emir examines his wine glass with military caution before taking a tentative sip. His eyebrows rise in surprise. "It's actually good."
"Don't sound so shocked," I say, settling beside Nesilhan and immediately feeling some of the tension leave my shoulders. "Even demons appreciate quality wine."
"Speak for yourself," Nesilhan mutters, taking a sip of water and making a face. "Even the water here tastes like it could strip paint."
"It's a good thing you're not drinking," Banu grins, already on her second glass.
"You're such a lightweight. Remember that time we got completely smashed with those Light Court soldiers?
You tried to drink Captain Matthias under the table and ended up singing battle hymns while standing on a chair. "
"I did not," Nesilhan protests, but she's smiling now, the first real smile I've seen since we arrived.
"You absolutely did. Then you challenged him to an arm-wrestling match and lost spectacularly." Banu pauses, wine making her bold. "Though he was very gentlemanly about it. Very... attentive."
Something cold settles in my chest at the way she says 'attentive.' "Captain who? What captain? There was a captain?"
"Matthias," Banu continues innocently, clearly not noticing the way my shadows are starting to coil. "Tall, blond, devastatingly handsome in that noble knight sort of way. Amazing smile. Built like a god of war but with the manners of a courtier."
"Banu," Nesilhan warns, but there's laughter in her voice.
"What? I'm just saying, you two had quite the.
.. connection that night. Very intense conversation by the fire.
Very close seating arrangements." Banu takes a long sip of wine, clearly enjoying herself.
"He couldn't take his eyes off you. Kept staring like you were the most fascinating thing he'd ever seen.
Very dreamy sighs whenever you laughed."
My wine glass creaks ominously in my grip. "How... close?"
"Oh, very close," Banu says with obvious delight. "Whispering secrets, sharing drinks from the same cup, that thing where he kept brushing imaginary lint off her shoulder—" Banu's eyes gleam as she watches my reaction. "Oh, and the way he'd lean in close when she spoke."
"There was actual lint," Nesilhan interrupts, but she's grinning now.
"Was there?" Banu asks innocently. "Because from where I was sitting, it looked like our dear captain was just looking for excuses to touch you."
The temperature in the room drops several degrees as my control starts to slip. If he fucking touched her, I'm going to leave right now just so I can track him down and end him. "And did he? Touch you?"
"Define 'touch,'" Nesilhan says, clearly enjoying my discomfort far too much.
"Nesilhan."
"He was very proper," she assures me, though her eyes are dancing with mischief. "Mostly."
"Mostly?"
"Well, there was that moment when he helped her up from her chair," Banu continues helpfully. "Very gallant. Very... lingering. His hands definitely stayed on her waist longer than strictly necessary."
"How much longer?" I ask with deadly calm. "Are we talking seconds? Minutes? Should I be planning a funeral?"
"And then she threw up in the garden, and I held her hair," Banu finishes with a grin. "Romance at its finest."
Emir is trying very hard not to laugh. "You threw up?"
"I was nervous about something," Nesilhan admits. "Can't remember what now."
"Probably the way Captain Perfect kept looking at you like you were the answer to his prayers," Banu suggests. "Very smoldering. Very, 'I would die for you, my lady.'"
"Captain fucking Perfect?" I repeat, my voice taking on a dangerous edge.
"That's what all the serving girls called him," Banu explains cheerfully. "Perfect manners, perfect face, perfect everything. Half the court was in love with him."
"Including you?" I ask Nesilhan with deceptive casualness.
"Oh, she was definitely smitten," Banu answers before Nesilhan can respond. "Kept asking about him for weeks. And those midnight walks in the garden? Very romantic."
"Banu!" Nesilhan protests, laughing despite herself.
"What happened to this captain?" I ask, and my shadows are definitely moving now, creeping across the floor like hunting predators.
"He got married," Nesilhan says quickly. "To a lovely girl from his hometown. They have three children now and raise horses."
"Fucking horses," I mutter. But some of the tension leaves my shoulders.
"Very domestic," Banu agrees. "Though I heard he named his eldest daughter Nesilah. Just a coincidence, I'm sure."
The wine glass shatters in my hand as my control finally snaps. My shadows surge forward like living things, drawn to violence, eager to hunt down a man who's been dead in my mind for the past five minutes.
"Banu," Emir warns, clearly recognizing the signs of an impending explosion.
"What? It's not like it means anything. So what if he carried a torch for our girl here for years? So what if he still gets that wistful look whenever someone mentions her name? So what if his wife looks suspiciously like a blonde version of?—"
"Banu!" Nesilhan and Emir say at the same time.
"I'm just saying," Banu continues blithely, apparently having lost all sense of self-preservation along with her sobriety, "it's very romantic. Star-crossed lovers, separated by fate, forever wondering what might have been?—"
I stand up so fast my chair topples backward. Darkness pours off me in waves, and several of the candles flicker ominously.
"Kaan," Nesilhan says, trying very hard not to smile as she reaches for my hand. "Sit down before you murder the furniture."
"Does he still— I mean, when he looks at his wife, does he— fuck, what I'm trying to ask is—" I drag my hands through my hair, completely losing my composure.
"Still what?"
"Love you."
The question hangs in the air like a challenge. Nesilhan studies my face for a long moment, then smiles with the kind of gentle affection that makes my heart do stupid things.
"Probably," she admits. "The same way, I probably still have some fondness for him. But, Kaan?" She rises and cups my face in her hands. "I chose you. I'm choosing you. I will always choose you, even when you're being a jealous, possessive nightmare."
"I'm not?—"
"You shattered a wine glass with your bare hands because another man named his daughter after me."
"That doesn't mean?—"
"Your shadows are currently strangling the curtains," Emir observes with perfect calm, though the corner of his mouth twitches.
I glance around and notice that yes, my shadows have indeed wrapped themselves around various pieces of furniture and are squeezing with obvious intent to murder.
"They're just... expressing themselves."
"They're having a tantrum," Nesilhan corrects, but she's still smiling. "Just like their master."
"I don't have tantrums. I have strategic emotional responses that occasionally involve property damage."
"You're having one right now."
"This is a perfectly reasonable response to discovering that some perfect golden boy spent years pining after my wife."
"See?" Banu says cheerfully to Emir. "I told you this would be hilarious."
I glance between them, realization finally dawning. "You did this on purpose. You planned this. Both of you."
"Maybe a little," Banu admits without a trace of shame. "You should see your face right now. It's like someone told you they were going to replace all your torture devices with flower arrangements."
"I'm going to kill him," I mutter, darkness still writhing around my feet.
"Who? Matthias?" Nesilhan asks with amusement.
"Yes. No. Maybe." I run my hands through my hair. "Did he really name his daughter after you?"
"Probably not. Banu might have made that up."
"I definitely made that up," Banu confirms cheerfully.
I stare at her as the full scope of her manipulation hits me. "You made it up?"
My shadows strike for her just as Banu shoots toward the ceiling, wings beating frantically as she dissolves into laughter.
"The daughter thing, yes. The rest of it? Oh, that was all true. He was absolutely besotted with her. Used to practice what he'd say if he ever got up the courage to court her properly."
"And you encouraged this torture because...?"
"Because watching you get jealous over a man who's been happily married for years and probably hasn't thought about Nesilhan in decades is the most entertainment I've had since..." She pauses, suddenly looking mischievous. "Well, since I successfully seduced a certain general."
Emir chokes on his wine. "Banu."
"What? It's true." She grins wickedly. "Though I have to say, the legendary general was surprisingly easy to seduce. One strategic weapons rack encounter and he was completely?—"
"We are not discussing this," Emir interrupts firmly, his face reddening.
"Oh, but we should!" Banu continues with obvious delight. "Nesilhan, you should have seen him. All that military discipline just... gone. Completely undone by a fairy half his size."
I stare at my general in disbelief. "My legendary general, terror of battlefields, the man who once stared down a demon lord without blinking—got seduced by a fairy in an armory?"
"It wasn't seduction," Emir protests. "It was... tactical maneuvering."
"Against a weapons rack," Banu adds helpfully.
"You WHAT?!" Nesilhan nearly chokes on her water, staring between them with wide eyes. "You slept with Emir?!"
"Repeatedly," Banu confirms cheerfully. "Though our first time was indeed against that weapons rack. Very romantic, actually. All that steel and leather, the scent of oil and metal polish?—"
"I'm going to check on security arrangements," Emir announces, standing abruptly with the dignity of a man trying to salvage what's left of his reputation.
"Running away won't change the fact that you're completely gone for her," I observe, enjoying his discomfort after the torture he just watched me endure.
"At least I don't throw things when someone mentions my past," Emir retorts. "Remember last month when the council rejected your proposal? You put three holes in the wall and sulked for a week."
"That was a strategic wall perforation."
"You threw a chair through a window."
"Strategic defenestration."
"And Kaan?" Emir adds with the satisfied air of a man getting his revenge. "Next time you want to discuss my personal life, remember I have centuries of your embarrassing moments to share."
He leaves with perfect military bearing, though I catch him glancing back at Banu with an expression that suggests his "security check" won't take very long.
The moment the door closes, Nesilhan leans forward with obvious interest. "All lright, now that he's gone—details. How was it?"
The way Nesilhan leans forward with that interested gleam in her eyes makes something dark and possessive coil in my chest. My shadows start moving restlessly as I watch her focus so intently on someone else's intimate details.
"No," I say, my voice dropping to that dangerous tone that sends smart people reaching for protective wards". "Absolutely fucking not."
"Come on," Nesilhan wheedles, completely oblivious to the way darkness is starting to pool around my feet. "I'm curious!"
That does it. I stand abruptly, chair scraping against stone, and before she can protest, I'm pulling her up and against me, one arm wrapping around her waist with possessive intent.
"You want to be curious about someone's bedroom activities?" I murmur against her ear, low enough that Banu can't hear, but she definitely catches the hunting edge. "How about I give you something worth being curious about instead?"
"Kaan—" she starts, but there's heat in her voice now, not protest.
"We're leaving," I announce to Banu, my hand sliding possessively down Nesilhan's spine. "My wife seems to have forgotten who she belongs to. Time for a fucking reminder."
Banu fans herself dramatically with her napkin, eyes sparkling with mischief. "Well, that got heated quickly." She stands, swaying slightly from the wine. "I think I'll go find our dear general. All this talk of weapons racks and possession has made me rather... breathless."
She heads toward the door with a knowing smirk.
As I pull Nesilhan toward the door, her laughter mixing with my growled promises of what's waiting for her, I catch sight of Banu practically floating toward wherever Emir is conducting his "security check."
Outside these walls, demons plot and Erlik schemes. Soon we'll face whatever fresh hell he's prepared for us.
But for now? For now, it's just us. Jealousy and possession, fairy seduction and general scandals, the kind of raw, messy, perfectly imperfect chaos that somehow makes us a family.
Even in hell, we've managed to find something worth fighting for.
And I'm about to show my wife exactly what that means.
At least until it's time for the purification ritual.