Chapter 27 #3
Imani studied him for another moment. “You’re very good at telling me what you don’t expect from me.”
Ellisar’s brow drew together, but he didn’t respond.
“What do you want?” she asked, her voice quiet.
He crossed to the edge of the bed and sat, loosening the high fastening at his throat as though the formal clothes had finally become intolerable.
Without the court watching him, some of the High Sentinel disappeared.
His shoulders dropped. He rubbed his face with both hands, then stared at the stone floor between his boots.
“I already told you that I want a home,” he said. Ellisar gave a faint, embarrassed huff when she continued staring. “Not a palace. I have spent enough of my life in fortresses.”
“You live in one.”
“Against my better judgment.”
A laugh threatened at the back of her throat, but she swallowed it.
He unbuttoned his shirt a bit, loosening the collar.
“I used to think I would eventually stop being useful enough for someone to send me somewhere dangerous. I would find a house where I could hear nothing more threatening than people arguing in the kitchen. There would be too many books, because apparently I keep buying them despite having nowhere permanent to put them. Someone would complain about my boots being left by the door.”
Imani could picture it far too easily. “You leave your boots by the door?” she asked.
“Constantly.”
“Appalling.”
“I have hidden it well.”
The corner of his mouth lifted, but the humor faded quickly.
“But mostly I want people there,” he continued. “A family. Friends who came in without waiting to be announced. A place where no one needed me to be High Sentinel before breakfast.” His fingers linked loosely between his knees. “Nothing particularly grand.”
Her chest clenched. “And now you’re king.”
“Yes.” His dry expression returned. “A catastrophic failure of planning.”
This time she did laugh, and the sound made him smile before his eyes dropped again.
“I’m telling you because you keep looking at me as though agreeing to this meant I arrived without wants of my own.
” He looked back at her. “I have them. I want more than an alliance eventually. I would like to know you when neither of us is performing for a room. I would like you to know me. If affection grows from that, I won’t pretend I don’t want it. ”
A vulnerable look crossed his face, and Imani knew he rarely let anyone see it.
“But wanting something does not make it mine,” he said. “That distinction matters to me.”
A lump formed in Imani’s throat, and she tried to swallow it away. “So, the house?” she asked.
“Still under consideration.”
“No fortress?”
“Absolutely not.”
“What if I like fortresses?”
Ellisar sighed. “Then apparently mating is a compromise.”
They both stared at each other for a few moments.
“I don’t know what will happen when I see him again,” she said, wringing her hands together.
“I don’t expect you to know.”
“You’re remarkably calm about such a thing.”
“I am not calm about it,” he scoffed. “I simply refuse to make my fear your cage.” Ellisar dragged a hand through his hair again, then met her stare. “I’m not asking you to love me more than him. I’m not even asking you to love me yet.”
“Then what are you asking?”
“For you to stand exactly where you are,” he said. “You made this decision. Not because you had to, but because you believed it was the right one.” A beat. “That’s enough.”
Imani studied him, searching the hard angles for a hidden trap. Was there something hidden beneath his words to poison the simplicity of his offer?
She found nothing.
Which terrified her more than anything. He wasn’t trying to pull her into his orbit; he was simply offering to stand beside her in hers. A sudden, hot sting pricked her eyes, which she blinked away furiously.
But the emotions cracked the door open for Kiran. His presence slithered into the edges of her awareness, a dark stain her new bond hadn’t washed away.
With a trembling breath, she thought about how there was no way this story could end well. Indeed, no scenario allowed Ellisar and Kiran to coexist peacefully without a violent clash.
She broke eye contact with Ellisar just long enough to hide her fear. When she looked back, the softness was gone, replaced by a ruler’s steel. “If Kiran moves against Essenheim, we won’t have room for understanding and reason… You know his reputation isn’t unearned.”
Ellisar’s face stayed impassive, but his eyes narrowed to slits. “I know.” His tone held only the lethal calm of a man prepared for war.
Imani allowed the silence to linger again, but its character had shifted. The oppressive uncertainty had faded, replaced by a tentative partnership—imperfect, challenging, yet undeniably genuine.
“We should leave soon,” she said, swallowing despite the lump still in her throat. “If we’re going to be seen, it needs to be before the parley.”
Ellisar inclined his head. “Agreed.”
As they turned toward the door, they moved in unison. Imani rested a hand flat against her chest, drawing a gentle breath as, for the very first time, the alluring pull of Kiran’s bond finally eased.