Chapter 23 #2
“I am sure it is weighing on her mind though. The things I said to her about seelie. I did not hold back my feelings about them in our time together, and I fear now that my blatant hatred of them will make her believe something impossible—that I hate her too.” I twisted the glass in my fingers.
“I am sure she believes I do, or that my feelings for her have changed, and I have no way of telling her that I do not care that she is seelie. I have no way of telling her that I love her and that nothing could alter this feeling that burns so brightly inside me. I told her once that my heart was not fickle… but she has been through so much, and I fear she is out there… I do not want her out there believing I might reject her as her fated one once did.”
My fingers tightened against the glass.
“I am not a fool like that wolf,” I growled and the shadows in the room flickered, growing restless as my heart tightened but warmed at the same time. “I know what I have, and I will fight to keep it. I will fight to keep her. No… I would fight for my court… but for her, I would go to war.”
Rhyn stared at me in silence, the crackling of the fire the only sound in the heavy air that seemed to press down on me as I thought about my little wolf, as my need to reach her made me as restless as my shadows.
“I am glad to hear that,” he said and turned his own glass in his fingers as he lifted it before the fire and gazed through the amber liquid at the flames. “Your tale mirrors mine… but let your version not be a tragedy and a warning as mine was.”
Rhyn had never talked of what had happened to his mate, not to me.
I had heard the stories of course, the whispered tales of how he had met and lost his fated female, and read the versions that had been recorded in the history books.
But I had the feeling that those stories were but a hollow version of the truth, lacking the colour and life and beauty, and great sorrow, of what he had been through.
What they had both been through.
The corners of his lips lifted into the barest hint of a sombre smile as frost glittered on his fingers and spread to the glass, forming beautiful patterns on it as it froze the contents.
The pain that shone in his eyes as he looked at the swirling waves of those frost patterns had me praying I never came to know what he suffered.
I wanted only happiness for myself and Saphira, but I imagined that Rhyn had only ever wanted happiness for himself and his mate too, but fate had been cruel to him.
I hoped it was not cruel to me.
“Relations between the seelie and unseelie were not as strained when I met her. They would come to my waters to fish sometimes, or even to visit the smaller islands off the coast of the Evening Star Court.” He lowered the glass but continued to stare into the flames, lost in them.
Or lost in his memories. Memories that he looked as if he was trying to find the warm and good in, but was only finding cold and darkness now.
“She was on a vessel and a great storm blew it off course, and it struck a reef near the north-eastern shores of my court. Many aboard it were washed ashore, their bodies strewn across the sands for the birds to pick at. Fishermen found them some days later, and most were dead… but few clung to life with a tenacious fervour that the Great Mother must have admired. They were taken to the nearby village, and there I rode to meet with them.”
His eyes dropped to the glass on his lap.
That faint smile blooming with warmth.
With love that touched his frosted eyes.
“There I met her.”
“The tales say she was a great beauty.” I hoped the words would keep that warmth glowing within him and would transport him back to those better days, when his life had been something different—something warmer and brighter, and rare.
Few unseelie found their fated ones.
Each was a gift from the Great Mother.
Rhyn nodded and his smile widened.
“Very much so. I had never beheld a more beautiful female. I knew from the moment I set eyes on her that I was done for… and when she looked at me… when she looked at me, I was undone. I knew in every thundering beat of my heart that she was mine.” He sighed and tipped his head back, letting it rest on the rear of his armchair as he stared at the ceiling.
“I visited her often while she convalesced near the village, enjoying the fields of blooms upon the rolling foothills of the mountains. She had looked so at home there. A rare flower. I courted her in secret, but when her family discovered what had happened to her and came for her, and saw we were in love… they made an example of her.”
The air in the room grew frigid, my breath misting before my face as his free hand tightened over the arm of his chair, those swirling patterns of frost shimmering on his pale skin.
“I did not know she was royal, one of the young daughters of the Evening Star King. He took her from me, though she did not want to go. She reached for me every moment he hauled her onto that boat, dragging her away from me, his men holding me back so I could not stop him. Before I could mount a rescue attempt, I received word…” He swallowed hard, throat working with it, and tears slipped down his temples as he closed his eyes, turning to icy diamonds.
“Her father murdered her to make an example of her… executing her before her people and their high king as a warning to all about what would happen if a seelie chose to follow their fated bond to an unseelie.”
Hail and snow pelted the windows, wind rattling the panes, and an icy wind blasted down the chimney, the roaring fire unable to warm it before it whipped through the room.
Rhyn’s jaw tightened.
“Do not say more, old friend,” I said, needing him to hear my voice and know he was not alone.
I knew the rest.
The pain he had experienced when she had been killed—when their bond had been broken—had turned his once-green court into a frozen wasteland in a heartbeat and had taken many lives, sundering his heart and his court in more ways than one.
Since then, his heart had been encased in ice, together with this land.
I found hope in his story, belief that a seelie could love an unseelie, but I also found a warning that our love could end in tragedy if political forces intervened, and I feared that was exactly what would happen to us, whether it was the Summer Court opposing us being together, or Ereborne.
I was not sure I could be as strong as Rhyn.
If Saphira was taken from me, I would destroy this realm, not just my court.
Rhyn had lost everything, but I still had a chance to prevent that from happening to me. I had a chance to change our fate and twist it towards one that would end with us together.
The Winter King lowered his head, gaze hollow as he looked at me. “Do not let them take her from you. That is my biggest regret. I let them take her from me.”
“No one will take Saphira from me.” I made those words my dark vow. “She might be in their hands, but she is still mine, and I am still hers… and I know she will not let them. She will not let them take her from me. She will fight. I will fight. And I will not fail her.”
Not as Rhyn had failed his mate.
“My little wolf is strong and she knows her heart, and she knows mine. She knows I will change the very fabric of this world to make her mine, and that is what I shall do.”
“I am glad to hear that.” Rhyn refilled his glass, causing the frozen liquid to break apart into ice cubes. “Whatever happens, know the Winter Court stands with you. Perhaps together we can reshape this land.”
“Thank you.” Words that did not seem adequate for what I felt as I raised my glass to him. “I owe you a great debt.”
“Oh, do not think I will not call it in. Did I mention Fallow needs a wife?” He grinned at me, but it was strained and lacked any real warmth.
“I am sure he can find one for himself.” I sipped my drink.
He chuckled, but it lacked warmth, and then eyed his glass before lifting his gaze to me again. “You mentioned wanting help with something else?”
I nodded. “I have seen the great fields of glasshouses you use to feed your court, and with the increasing burden upon the farms near Wraith Wood and Belkarthen now I have ceased trade with other courts, I thought perhaps you might be able to help me establish new farms in the fields and valleys near Falkyr.”