Chapter 24 Ryder
RYDER
“Find Elowen,” I roared, “and bring her to the royal common room now!”
Hunt moved down the corridor quickly. Thankfully, he’d held back any smart remarks if he had them. I wasn’t in the mood to deal with him or anyone else. What happened could never occur again—would never occur again. I’d lost every bit of control and turned into my father in an instant.
My boots smacked against the stone as I made my way through the halls. Anger and remorse battled with each heartbeat, no other feeling existing between the two extremes. Rage had won at the workshop and was still attempting to control my every thought and move.
The room shrank around me while I paced. There had to be an explanation for the hatred I felt toward Audryn. Logically, I knew she’d done nothing so egregious to deserve my wrath, but somewhere deep down, it didn’t matter; I’d needed to punish her.
The door creaked open less than five minutes later, and I spun on the inky-haired woman. “What did you do to me?” I demanded.
She sauntered into the room and casually sat in the chair at the head of the table. My father’s chair. My chair.
“Answer me,” I demanded once more. “What did you do? I just lost my shit on Audryn for no fucking reason. And in front of others.”
“There’s always a cost, Prince.” The woman smirked. “You accepted the terms and now you pay.”
I stomped toward her, where she remained seated and unflinching. She was fearless.
“Take a breath and sit.” She kicked a chair out with her foot, causing it to teeter and nearly topple over.
Tentatively, I grabbed the wood and sat.
Not only was I in the wrong seat at the table, but I was also too close to the woman who’d caused so much angst in my life in such a short amount of time.
She needed to fix whatever she broke or I’d sentence her to death.
Using Macabre magic was grounds for execution without a trial; fuck my father’s stay on executions.
I was the fucking prince and would proceed how I saw fit.
“Undo what you did,” I ordered. “Fix it now!”
“Do you not feel the bond you so badly wanted?” The woman’s brow furrowed. “Are you not connected to Audryn? Does she not seem to feel the bond as well?”
“All I felt today was pure hatred. It took everything in me not to kill her. I wanted nothing more than to put my boot on her neck and crush the access to her lungs,” I sneered. “I nearly couldn’t stop myself.”
The admission should have been the end of me, yet rage still thrummed hot, wiping out all lingering remorse. If I saw Audryn again, I might just fulfill my desire.
A moment later, shame crashed over me as the revelation made its impact.
How had I gone from being so certain I cared for her, to barely managing not to kill her?
Seeing Orlan placing the pendant around her neck had ignited a fire within me I couldn’t extinguish. Each of her words stoked the flames.
“I warned you, concessions were required for a love so great to be mired,” Elowen continued. “A mated bond is not something to take in jest. For if you bend it, you will be left with unrest.”
“Speak real fucking words!” I hit the table with a fist. I was tired of her antics.
“A bond is greater than almost any love. Forcing it to flex to your desire will indeed give you the love you seek, but love can live alongside hatred. Only you can mitigate the feelings you experience.”
“So I’ll hate my wife?”
Elowen’s mouth ticked up. “Do we not all hate our spouses at times? You must learn to control your anger if either of you will survive the bent connection.”
“That wasn’t what I asked for.” I pressed. “You didn’t tell me what it would take. If I had known—”
“Then what?” the woman cut in. “You’d have married Audryn without a mating bond?” She scoffed. “Your throne would be your sister’s, and you’d be sitting in the shadows watching her make the decisions for Rivale.”
My head tilted to the ceiling. As much as I’d like to say I would’ve chosen differently, I wouldn’t have. I would’ve killed anyone who impeded the throne, and apparently that included Audryn.
“That’s what I thought. Knowing what you know now, you’d still choose the same fate.” Elowen sat back in her chair, arrogance seeping from her pores. “Though the bond is there for both of you to grab, do be wary. Your dearest may refuse, and that won’t be temporary.”
I drew back. “What do you mean? You said it was a true mating bond.”
“Anyone can refuse a mating bond, whether given from the Divine or Macabre itself.” Her brow twitched. “You cannot force someone to accept, though you can guide them.”
“How do I get her to accept it?” Worry poured into every crevice of my mind.
“Shall I instruct you how to properly bed a woman too?” She lifted an eyebrow and shrugged. “I suppose you begin with an apology and keep her close. Prove your love to her.”
My heart raced at the thought of admitting my wrongdoing. If I retracted my statements, Audryn might return to her defiant behavior. Though I had overreacted, I still needed her to fall in step. But if I refused to make amends, it could cost me the crown.
“Such decisions,” Elowen tsked. She started for the door, rubbing her fingers over my shoulder and across my back as she passed.
“I don’t want to be like my father,” I mumbled.
She turned. “Oh, but you see, Prince,”—she smirked—“you already are.”
With the click of the door, I was left ruminating on what I'd become and who I’d hoped to be. And as time passed and anger waned, contrition filled the gaps.
On wobbling legs, I made my way down the halls, temper dissipating with each step until it was gone entirely.
Roark stood stationed at the end of the corridor, and I realized I’d forgotten to ask him about Allura’s tea.
But it no longer seemed to matter. Even if I discovered Audryn was to blame for the wrongdoing or had given the buttercups to Maris, I no longer cared.
“Fisher.” I dipped my chin in his direction before turning to Audryn’s door. I went to knock but paused, my hand lingering on the wood. What was I going to say? There was no excuse for the way I behaved, but I couldn’t leave the situation as it was.
At first, I knocked lightly on the door. No answer. After several more attempts, I pushed the door open and stepped in cautiously. I’d half expected her to be sobbing on the bed, but the room was empty.
Her beige dress hung over a chair, dust covering the entire bottom. My stomach sank, reliving what I’d done. I gathered the fabric and took it to Fisher, ordering it to be laundered.
A large stack of books sat on one side of the bed and two open books lay face down on a nearby table. My hand ran over the open items; she wasn’t only brushing up on Rivale’s history, but Kuroden’s as well. I smiled to myself; I was lucky to have such a woman.
Even as my guest, she was researching the kingdom of the king I'd been hosting. She was sure to succeed when it was her job to host as the queen. I hadn’t yet told her that her suggestion with the bitumen worked and that the repairs on the castle were forthcoming.
Audryn was smarter than she looked and wasn’t only the lowly market girl everyone saw her as.
Perhaps she’d like to visit her home to show everyone she’d claimed a prince to call her own.
Water sloshed onto the bathing room floor, drawing my attention. I took a seat on the sofa near the window and waited. When she walked through the door, my heart swelled with nothing but pride and love.
Her hair was sopping wet and hung over her shoulders. Her face was still red, no doubt from the pain I caused. My eyes scanned over her body, her skin damp with beads of water crawling down and the large towel covering more than I preferred.
I followed the line across her chest and down her arm, where my gaze stalled. Four small bruises had developed on her forearm. They were faint, but were there for all to see what damage I’d caused.
“Audryn.” I jumped to my feet and crossed the room in only two strides. I went to touch her, but she pulled back; she fucking pulled away from me. “I’m not going to hurt you.” Despite trying to assure her, my words fell short.
“What are you doing here?” Her eyes jumped around my face. “I was taking a bath as you requested. Am I late for dinner?”
“No. Dinner is cancelled.” I stepped forward, watching as she held her breath and waited. I found myself once again a boy watching my mother tense from my father’s presence, but I stood in his place.
Abruptly, I fell to my knees at her feet, wrapping my arms around her legs and pressing into her damp skin.
“I lost my temper earlier. There are no words adequate enough to justify my actions.” My head remained down.
Groveling at her feet wasn’t something I’d even considered, but the adoration I felt for her was about to burst me open.
She stood silently.
“I don’t want to be like my father.” My eyes burned. “I’ve worked so damn hard not to be like him, yet here I am, on my knees in front of you and begging for forgiveness for my actions. Actions my father himself would have committed—had committed against my mother.”
Passing seconds felt like hours. There were no words to guarantee my clemency, but damn would I speak every word possible just to try.
“What can I do to make it up to you?” I begged. If she wanted every jewel in Rivale, it was hers. If she needed to buy a gown every day for the rest of her life and drain the coffers, I’d let it happen. There was nothing I wouldn’t do to earn her forgiveness.
A tingle soared through my body as Audryn’s hand combed through my hair with her gentle fingers.
Turning my head, I planted small kisses on her leg before switching to the other. She remained silent while I lapped up droplets of water left over from her bath with my tongue. Regret remained at the forefront as I moved up her thigh where the towel met her skin.
“Ryder.” She let out an exhale. “Prince Sutton.”
“Ryder,” I corrected as I pulled the towel up, exposing one more inch of her milky thighs. I wrapped my mouth around her, sucking in her skin and lingering before ascending again.
“I don’t think we should do this,” she said in a near whisper.
I moved up once more, my eyes nearly level with what I desired. “You don’t need to do anything,” I mumbled against her. “I’ll do all the work, I want to taste you.”
Slowly, I tilted my eyes up and waited for her permission to continue; she looked to the wall, but said nothing. Though I might have had difficulty controlling my anger, I’d never proceed with a woman against her will. I was better than that.
I stood, letting my fingers glide over her bare legs and against her towel-covered abdomen as I rose to my feet. “I’ll never hurt you again,” I promised. “Never.”
I tilted her chin to me and placed a gentle kiss on her lips before consuming her mouth with mine.
The wound I’d caused still lingered, but she gave in and our tongues danced once more.
Wrapping my arms around her, I picked her up and carried her to the bed.
She let out a breath as I set her down gingerly and laid my body into hers.
“Do you want me to stop?” I pulled back, eyes scanning and awaiting her permission. With the smallest shake of her head, I moved to her neck and sprinkled kisses down to her collarbone.
I parted the towel, exposing the glorious pink and perky nipples waiting for me.
Carefully, I lapped my tongue around one while caressing the other with the thumb and forefinger of my free hand.
I moved to give the other breast the attention it deserved and progressed down to her navel, encircling my tongue around it.
Time passed as I poured myself into her, worshipping every inch before making my way down to the apex of her thighs.
Kneeling on the floor beside the bed, I pulled her body to the edge. We didn’t need to go to dinner; I’d found my meal, and it was the most delicious dish on the menu.
“Ryder?” Audryn pushed onto her elbows.
“Shhh, unless you want me to stop, and then I will.” I watched as she inhaled and fell back onto the bed.
Slowly, I parted her and found the tender spot waiting for me.
Pressing my mouth into her, I began flattening my tongue against her body while pressing in and swirling around the sensitive area.
Her body flexed and twisted as I worked to warm her from the inside out.
When she was on the edge, I stopped and placed two fingers inside of her, palm up for good measure.
I went back to work, beckoning her arousal with my fingers and pulling her desire with my mouth.
She could take all night, and I’d stay on my knees for her as I waited for her to find her pleasure.
But a moment later, she was crashing, tipping over the edge and shattering into dozens of tiny pieces around me.
She was lust and love and everything in between. Emotions jumped from my chest as I helped her through the wave of bliss I’d created. It was all I’d ever wanted, and I’d give it to her again and again for the rest of our lives.
When her body relaxed, I slowly trailed kisses up from her center to her mouth.
She met my lips with her own, eyes glazed and contented.
Happiness sat on her face, but unease lingered below the surface.
We’d get back to where we were before that day; I’d put in the work and be sure not to lose my temper again, regardless of the change the bond created in me.
“Would you like to see your father?” I offered, “I want to speak with him.”
Regardless of my title, asking her father’s permission before I made her my betrothed was the proper thing to do.
Orlan was nearly done with the ring, and though I hadn't been able to look it over earlier, I’d wrap a piece of ribbon around her finger if that’s what it took to make her my betrothed.
There was nothing more I wanted than for all to see that she was mine.
“I’d love that.” Audryn’s eyes beamed.