Chapter 18 Jade
Chapter Eighteen
JADE
Should I set the knives out, or should I be worried about him using them to finally end this between us for good?
I stare at them in the drawer. The meeting with my family last weekend didn’t go too bad. Sure, there was a fight, and I still don’t have the best feeling about it all, but they got along as much as could be expected, and Ezra looked happy to be with his cousins again.
But there was something else in his eyes when we were leaving. Something that makes me think maybe he’s still playing me. I wouldn’t put it past him.
The Rinaldos know how to manipulate people for their benefit. Ezra grew up with them. And he stalked me. He spent months talking with me in chatrooms and gaining my trust.
But now that I’ve met him, now that I’ve spent time with him, I still don’t know if I can trust him. Not fully.
There’s something unpredictable in him, just like there’s something unpredictable in me.
It’s terrifying and appealing at the same time.
The front door opens, the alarm system beeping to let me know someone’s inside.
The familiar scent of Ezra’s cologne wafts down the hall as I pull two knives out of the drawer and take them to the table. After all, if he really wanted to kill me, he could do it with his bare hands.
It’d be all too easy to scoop out my eyeballs with a spoon, even. Or take a fork to my neck. Stab me in the carotid and watch me bleed out all over the dinner I’ve spent hours preparing.
But if he was really going to kill me, I don’t think he’d be pushing me to follow my dreams.
Maybe it’s time to start trusting him a little more.
“Smells good in here.” Ezra dumps the biohazard that is the contents of his gym bag into the washing machine and turns it on.
He shuts the little closet door to block out the sound and turns to me.
“Thanks. We learned to make it in class the other day, so I wanted to try it here.”
He looks at the steak resting on the cutting board, inching closer to the kitchen, strands of his damp hair falling into his face. “Steak and mashed potatoes?”
“Steak au poivre and herbed mashed potatoes, and then there are some lemon asparagus on the side.” I grab the oven mitts, opening up the oven.
“Did you poison it?” His tone is only half-joking as he looks at me. “I mean, the night with your family wasn’t the worst, and I didn’t kill your brothers.”
I swallow hard, wondering why we both have murder on the mind. It has to be a sign that something is wrong with us, even if neither of us wants to admit it.
There’s something here, and though I’ve been trying to trick myself into thinking it could work, it probably can’t.
There’s too much standing in our way. Too many things he’s done that I shouldn’t be willing to ignore.
I pull the asparagus out of the oven, setting it to the side and tossing off a mitt. Snatching up the wooden spoon, I stir the sauce in the pan.
“You’re starting to worry me.” He puts his hands on my hips, the planes of his body pressed against my back, the curve of his cock digging into my ass.
I lean back into him, even though I know it’s a bad idea.
I shouldn’t be getting more attached to him. I should be distancing myself.
Ezra’s warm breath ghosts over my neck, sending a shiver down my spine. “Did you poison me, love?”
“No.” I lick the spoon to prove a point. “Why would I?”
“Because we both know that, sooner or later, this is going to have to end.”
“And you think it’s going to end one way or another?” I move out of his grip, grabbing down the plates and dishing up the food.
He hums and goes to light the candles in the center of the table. “It’s going to have to, eventually. We’re either going to try to kill each other, or something else is going to happen. Noah is going to know I was meeting with your family. There will be punishment for that. If he doesn’t kill me.”
“Do you worry about him killing you?” I put the loaded plates on the table before taking my seat.
Ezra sits down and slices into the steak, swirling it through the sauce. “Not really. Probably should be. I know he’s got no qualms about it. Doesn’t matter, though. Everyone ends up dead one day or another.”
My stomach ties itself into a knot, my appetite disappearing. “Yeah, but that doesn’t mean you have to speed it up. I shouldn’t have brought you to meet my family. I may not like you that much, but I don’t want to see you dead yet either.”
The corner of his mouth twitches, his gaze locking with mine. “Because you don’t want anyone else to do the job?”
“Exactly,” I force out, though I know I shouldn’t have to force myself.
After all he’s done, I should want to kill him. There’s a part of me that does. It’s not like I didn’t think about dosing the sauce with antifreeze or asking Ellie what medications she had access to that could kill a man.
Joshua wouldn’t have hesitated to give me enough coke to kill a horse.
I have every opportunity in the world, and I’m not taking it. I think that says a little something about how deeply fucked up I am inside.
Or maybe how good it feels to be with someone who finally sees me for who I am. Someone who, in a weird way, wants what’s best for me. I think.
“Do you ever think about the future?” I stab a piece of asparagus, popping it in my mouth.
Ezra motions to the food in front of him, half his plate already gone. “This is really good.”
“Thank you.” I force myself to eat a couple of pieces of steak. “Seriously, though, do you think about the future?”
He finishes his food, his gaze searching mine. “Doesn’t seem to be much point in thinking beyond a few weeks from now. Don’t know what’s going to happen or what kind of mood Noah is going to be in.”
“And you don’t think you should plan for that?”
He shrugs and leans back in his chair. “Do you plan for all the ways your family’s activities could get you killed? Or do you go about living your life and just hope it doesn’t happen?”
“Well, I guess I hope it doesn’t happen.
” I bite my lower lip for a second before sighing.
“I don’t know, to be honest. Anytime I ever thought about the future, it’s been in relation to what my family is going to need from me and when.
I haven’t had much time to think about what life would look like if I actually followed my passions. ”
“You’re doing that now.” He gets up from the table, taking his plate into the kitchen and rinsing it off before rolling up his sleeves and getting to work on the rest of the dishes. “You might not want to think about it, but with everything changing, maybe it’s time you start.”
“Maybe you’re right.” I pick at a little more of my dinner. “You have a fight tonight, don’t you?”
“Yeah.” He hums to himself, shifting his weight from one foot to the other as he scrubs the dishes. “And you’re going to be here, studying, and not distracting me, right?”
I take my plate into the kitchen, packing away the leftovers. “I’m a distraction?”
He gives me a smile that has me considering asking him to bend me over the counter. “You’re the biggest distraction I have.”
Leaning against the counter, I cross my arms, eyeing the way the muscles in his forearms move as he finishes washing the last of the dishes. “I don’t think I’m that much of a distraction. You seem to be functioning just fine right now.”
The look in his eyes has arousal pooling between my thighs.
He dries off his hands, tossing the towel to the side. Ezra leans close to me, bracing himself against the counter on either side of my body.
My chest brushes against his as I take a deep breath. “You’re going to be late for your fight if you keep looking at me like that.”
“Good.” His lips graze my jaw, the word nothing more than a husky whisper.
A shiver rolls down my spine as one of his hands traces its way down my waist, hooking into the waistband of my jeans.
A small gasp leaves me as he pulls me away from the counter and into his body.
His cock swells, pressing into me.
I moan as his lips close over mine.
Teeth sink into my bottom lip, biting down hard before his tongue soothes away the sting.
I run my hands up his muscled chest, loving the way he sighs into my mouth.
The edge of the counter digs into the base of my spine as he leans closer, bending me slightly backward.
My hands link together behind his neck, holding on while he hauls my pants down my legs.
I pull back from him enough to take my shirt off and toss it to the side.
His eyes drop to my breasts, his mouth following the path of his gaze.
He teases me through the thin fabric, biting one nipple and then the other.
My thighs are slick as his fingers sink between my legs, circling around my clit.
“You’re already soaked.” He groans and grabs me by the hips, picking me up and putting me on the edge of the counter.
I lean back on my forearms, looking up at him as he turns and opens the fridge, pulling out a can of whipped cream.
I frown. “What do you think you’re doing?”
Ezra traces a line of whipped cream down my pussy before he crouches and licks it up. “Having my favorite dessert.”
My head tips back as he draws lines up my inner thighs, taking his time licking them away too. The sensation of the cold cream followed by his tongue is enough to have me grinding, trying to get his tongue exactly where I need it.
With a smirk, he puts a dollop of cream on my clit. “What do you want?”
I moan as he sucks off the cream. “Please.”
“Not good enough.” He sets the whipped cream to the side, grabbing a knife from the block and slicing through the center of my bra.
The fabric falls away as my heart slams into my ribs.
I try to press my thighs together to help with my aching pussy, but his waist is in the way.
Ezra leans over me, covering my nipples in whipped cream, taking his time swirling his tongue and sucking on the sensitive buds.
“I’m going to come.” I lock my ankles behind his legs, rocking into him even though he’s still fully clothed.