Chapter 10 Daphne
DAPHNE
Last night, I shut my eyes and drifted to sleep only once.
It seemed that, within minutes, I dreamed I was locked inside a room, unable to get out.
Except, unlike at the apartment in New York, I wasn’t alone in this one.
Ryder was there with me. I shook myself awake, but after that, I was too afraid to close my eyes again.
Rather than risk sleeping, I got my tablet out and read a book until sunrise, then made coffee and waited for my parents to get up. In Australia, they were early risers. Who knew what timetable they might be on only one day after arriving in the States.
“Something smells good,” my father said when he joined me in the kitchen a few minutes after the coffee finished brewing.
We sat in the breakfast nook, and he asked me about Cru. At first, I tried to play it off as nothing, but he saw through it.
I told him about the conversation we’d had and that Cru said there was too much at stake for us to experiment by adding romance to the mix. Those weren’t his exact words, but I knew that’s what he meant.
“We need time to let things happen naturally between us, Dad,” I’d said. “If we force it, there’s far more to lose than a romance. I might lose my job and, worse, one of the most important friendships of my life.”
“He’s a good man, Daph,” he responded. “Most wouldn’t care enough to handle it the way he is.”
“Beau wouldn’t have.”
He nodded and rested his chin on his hand. “You and Beau had your time. If it was meant to be, you’d be with him.”
I told him I agreed, and while everyone assumed I was devastated by his relationship with Sam, I wasn’t. In fact, I was relieved. I wouldn’t have turned my back on him after his mother’s death—it hadn’t even been a month yet since it happened—but I was glad he’d reached out to Sam instead.
I think Cru was right when he said I’d sensed he was in the cottage two nights ago. I couldn’t say whether the reason I felt so safe with him was because he’d rescued me or because I’d felt that way for years.
He was always there for me when Beau wasn’t.
Even when he and I were on again rather than off.
I hoped things were different between him and Sam—that he loved her enough to take care of her instead of expecting she’d always be the one to see to his every need.
I didn’t know Sam well, but based on the little I did, I couldn’t see her being Beau’s doormat.
Cru had always put me first, and after being stepped on so many times by Beau’s metaphoric dirty shoes cleaned off on my rough exterior, I wondered if Cru felt the same way about me now.
Did he look at me and wonder if I’d ever put him first?
Had I ever? I was ashamed to think that, if I had, it wasn’t as often as I should have.
“They’re in,” I said when he set his mobile down.
“My ma and Bit are too.”
“This will be such fun. Do you have any ideas about what we should serve?”
“I haven’t thought about it yet. Do you?” he asked.
“What would you think about sushi tacos? If raw fish is an issue, we could cook some of it. I was thinking salmon, tuna, and yellowtail. We could also substitute one of these for lobster. I’d make different salsas or sauces for each and use both raw and toasted nori.”
Cru’s eyes opened wide. “That sounds amazing. Are you sure it isn’t too much work?”
“Hardly any at all, actually. It’s just a matter of cutting up the fish, then making the salsa or sauce. Toasting the nori only takes a few seconds if we do it on the stove.” I walked over to the cooktop and removed the griddle, exposing the grill side.
“I’m in. Just tell me how I can help.”
“I’ll need a ride to the market,” I said, winking.
Rather than go north once we reached the coast, Cru went south, in the direction of San Luis Obispo. A few miles into the drive, he pulled off the highway onto a dirt road.
“Where are we going?” I asked.
“To the best wholesale fish supplier on the coast.”
“I never knew this was here,” I said when he parked in front of what looked like a shack.
Inside, though, was nothing like I’d imagined. While not on the same grand scale as the Sydney Fish Market, this was equally impressive. I took my time perusing the options.
“What do you think?” Cru asked.
I chuckled. “I could shop here every day. Everything looks so fresh.”
“Not far down the road is another wholesale market that sells produce, and next door to that is a bakery.”
“I can’t believe Beau never brought me here.” I regretted the words as soon as I said them, but Cru didn’t appear fazed.
“He doesn’t know about it.”
“I’m surprised.”
Cru chuckled. “I kept it a secret since I wanted to be the one who brought you here first.”
I studied him when a man behind the counter initiated a conversation.
Cru was hot as fuck, but he never acted like he knew he was.
His arms strained against the fabric of his shirt in the same way his powerful thighs filled out his jeans.
That, along with the mental picture I had of his hardness from yesterday morning, had me squeezing my legs together.
As if he sensed my gaze, Cru turned his head. His eyes met mine, then traveled to my hardened nipples that had nothing to do with the temperature inside the fish market. I didn’t bother trying to mask my attraction—the desire I felt was far too powerful to hide.
“Hey, Daph. Come meet Captain Bob.”
The man’s skin was tan and weathered, but his hair had no gray, making it difficult to guess his age. “If I were ten years younger, you’d have competition for this beautiful woman.”
“I’ve got plenty of it now,” said Cru, putting his arm around my shoulders in the way he might if we were more than just friends, and I loved it so much I beamed up at him.
“Do you want to choose or let the captain?” he asked.
“If you don’t mind,” I said to the man who studied us.
“My pleasure. Cru said you want tuna, yellowtail, and salmon. He also said you’d be open to lobster in place of the sockeye.”
“Yes, please.”
Cru removed his arm but remained close as we waited.
I brushed his hand with mine, wishing he’d hold it, but he didn’t.
As much as I yearned for him in this setting—a smelly, damp market with concrete floors—how would it be when we worked in the vineyards and the winery?
The latter was equally damp and smelly, just of grapes rather than fish.
And what about when we were home after a long day of work, making the evening meal together after we’d both changed out of our work clothes and were fresh out of the shower? In the summer, I knew he’d wear shorts once we were home, like I probably would.
Cru leaned down so his mouth was near my ear. “What are you thinking about?” he whispered.
“Summer.”
His head cocked.
“Don’t ask,” I whispered back.
His eyes blazed, and he nodded once. “I won’t. At least not yet.” His smirk told me he saw this as an opportunity to get back at me for teasingly torturing him the morning at the cottage and later in the lingerie store. Honestly, I couldn’t wait to see what he’d do.
As it turned out, he didn’t do anything, at least not on our way to the produce market, bakery, or kitchen supply store.
I sat on pins and needles the entire return trip to Los Caballeros, then again after we took our purchases in and put them away.
In fact, he hardly said one word to me. I was beginning to realize I didn’t know Cru half as well as I thought I did.
Maybe his teasing and flirting, in all the years our paths crossed, he’d done because he knew I wouldn’t take him seriously since I was with Beau. Now that he wasn’t a barrier between us, Cru realized I might take his playful banter to mean more than it did.
The other thing that bothered me was how everyone assumed he and I were together. Didn’t anyone think I was capable of being on my own? Did I always have to be linked to a man? Men certainly weren’t defined by whoever they were dating or married to.
I prepped three kinds of salsa plus two types of sauce.
Captain Bob had cooked the lobster tails while we waited and chopped it, the tuna, and yellowtail in the way I’d told him I’d serve it.
The salad was prepped, and the dessert we’d purchased at the bakery would only need to be cut later.
Besides plating and serving, I’d still have to air fry both the raw and toasted nori, but I wouldn’t do that until we were almost ready to eat.
“Anything I can do?” Cru asked when he returned from the caves where he’d chosen a few wine options.
“Everything is set. I was wondering, do you still keep horses on the estate?”
“We have a full stable.”
“Would it be possible for me to ride?” I asked.
“Of course. I’ll change, and we can go,” he offered.
“You don’t have to join me if you don’t want to.”
His eyes scrunched. “I’d like to.”
“Very well, then. I’ll change and meet you outside in a few minutes.”
“Daph?” he said as I walked away.
“Yes?”
“Is everything okay?”
I turned around and put one hand on my hip. “Everything is okay. I’m okay. There’s no need to keep asking.”
“Gotcha.”
“How about you, Cru? Is everything okay?”
He smirked. “Yes, Daphne.”
“Good.” I spun around and raced up the stairs, realizing Cru was absolutely right in saying there was too much at risk for me to keep flirting with him. He and I were meant to be friends, but clearly, not lovers. It had only taken three days to come to that realization.
“I can tack my own horse,” I said when Cru brought one out of the stall, then proceeded to brush him.
“I don’t mind.” He ran his hand over the animal’s withers.
“What’s his name?”
“This here is Goose.”
I slowly approached, letting him make eye contact with me, then held out my hand to touch the bridge of his nose. When he didn’t flinch, I stroked the same area, stepping closer every few seconds. When he bumped me with his head, I wrapped one arm around him and stroked his mane.
“He likes you,” said Cru.