34. Chapter 34 Staley
Chapter 34 Staley
B efore we leave for the ceremony, Noah pulls me aside and gives me a rare vinyl copy of the Romeo + Juliet soundtrack as my graduation gift. When he says, “You are your father’s favorite thing, Staley, and he is proud of you,” I sob off all the mascara Maeve lent me for today. Noah and I are crying messes, but we’re messy together, at least.
When you love someone with dementia, speaking about their cognition as it used to be is a dreadful reminder of what one no longer has, and yet, Noah’s words are a gift to me because I know them to be true in my heart and soul. After all, I am proud of myself too.
Graduation is a bittersweet day. We know having Dad in a large crowd will only overwhelm him, and Leslie offers to stay behind and sends the next best person in his place—Noah. The flash of his outdated camera with honest-to-goodness film in it—the kind that needs developing—brings me to a squint at every single click, but the amount of pride and joy exuding from his smile reminds me of when I was young. When I didn’t know that I had two parents who loved me as if I was their best thing.
It’s a warm spring day as I receive a degree I have no use for. It turns out that falling in love and being loved puts big life decisions into perspective.
“Theo, don’t stand there. Get in the group picture, you too, Maeve.” Noah bosses us into posing for pictures. It’s not graduation day for Maeve, but it wouldn’t be the same without her after how much of a staple she’s become in my life. Theo threatens to make my collection of The X Files DVDs disappear if I keep hogging his full-of-life best friend from him.
If anyone had asked me months ago if I’d have a full-fledged, hot-as-hell, wordsmith boyfriend and three new best friends, I would have called them a liar-liar-pants-on-fire. But as often as I have Theo pinch me, I’ve yet to wake from what I consider a dream come true.
Theo locks his fingers through mine because he knows I miss Dad on such a big day. How I wish I could have it all. Right as this thought hits me smack dab in my frontal lobe, Maeve crushes me from behind with a life-altering hug, the kind that reminds me how to breathe and lean on someone else occasionally. Gabby links her arm with mine and looks up to me with her electric pink eyeliner on full display. Today, she and I are nearly the same height because of the chunk level of her shoes, which have at least four or five inches on them.
“Okay, on the count of three, everybody smile like you mean it.”
Noah counts us down, and we give our best version of our delighted selves until Gabby tackles us to the ground and shouts, “Cuddle puddle!”
We shriek and collapse against one another. We’re all arms and laughter, and it’s when the chaos fades that I realize this whole time I thought I’d never be complete again. If not for Noah stepping up and helping multiple days of the week, I couldn’t have explored being this head over heels in love with Theo and my friends as I am now.
Theo ratted me out to our friend Harrison and laid out my entire chaotic life to him, from the expensive medications and the home nurses to the numerous cuddle clients I had every week. Harrison Phillips’s handsome generosity is responsible for all of us breathing much easier these days. Harrison knows I would never take a dime from him, but I did accept his help facilitating support with paying for Dad’s medicine and home care.
Noah was our missing piece all along. With him easing back into life with us, my stress is better managed, and I have time to enjoy living. Noah helped Dad start a garden and grow flowers, a calming activity he looks forward to every morning.
“Alright, you crazy kids. Go be young and enjoy the night. Don’t get arrested, though, because I won’t bail you out.” At this cheesy dad joke, Noah dials Leslie to let her know he’s on his way home and to tell Russell.
Theo and I are still lying in the middle of the carpeted grass when he rolls into me.
“P-penny for your thoughts.”
This is what I love about Theodore Sullivan: He always wants to know what’s on my mind, the good and the bad. I’ll never tire of his sparkly smile, full eyelashes, or dirty mouth. He is my Theo and my Luca, all wrapped up into one, and I don’t have to wonder what I did to deserve such a man because I know now I get to have this.
“I keep thinking about how much you’ve stepped into by being part of my world. It’s a lot.”
Theo brushes the tassel from my cap away from my face and sweeps his thumb across my glossy lips.
“It m-might be a lot, but I don’t want any less than what’s right here. I’m a m-man who will never tire of the s-sun. I love all of you, Staley.”
His promise differs from a Shakespearean sonnet or a ballad stanza by Dickinson. It’s Theo, and every word from his mouth is poetry to me.