Chapter 12 #4
I looked between the two of them, one holding me like I was everything worth fighting for, the other reminding me I was never fighting alone.
Since Elias was able to pull some strings with his lieutenant, I was able to see the judge fairly quickly for an emergency temporary restraining order hearing.
The courtroom smelled like polished wood, old secrets, and nerves dressed in business casual.
The pew-like benches looked holy like the ones in an old school Baptist church, but felt like judgment day punishment: rigid, narrow, and unforgiving.
Golden scales etched into the wall above the judge’s bench glinted under flickering fluorescent lights, as if they were judgmental halos, buzzing, blinking, condemning, rolling their eyes, mocking the idea of justice.
The court bailiff called my name aloud.
Jonay Jacobson v. Kameron Sweets.
Temporary Restraining Order Hearing.
The words hit like a spotlight on shame, like I’d been called to testify against my own scars.
Elias rose before I could move, smooth but ready. He adjusted his badge beneath his jacket, the shift quiet but thunderous, like a warning: Don’t try me today.
His fingertips brushed mine, warm and steady, sunlight breaking through clouds. Not pushy, just present.
“You don’t have to be strong by yourself no more,” he said low, voice thick with gravel and grace. That man could make a whisper sound like a sermon.
I nodded, chin barely dipping, but inside, my spirit was clawing at the walls of my chest, screaming I’m not okay.
I was terrified, but not of Kam. He could rot in the shadows he created.
No, I feared what choosing me might cost. Of what I might lose in the process of trying to save my own damn life.
Kam sat two rows ahead, dressed like a lie. Wrinkled outlet store suit, collar crooked, sunglasses on like he couldn’t face the light of what he’d done. That same nasty smirk from The Nook curled his lips, fake confidence painted over cowardice. He looked like he thought he was still in control.
Elias shifted beside me, muscles tight, breath shallow, clutching his water bottle hard as hell. He didn’t say anything, but his energy changed—the calm before a hurricane. His hand hovered behind me, not touching, but near enough to feel, a protective field made of restraint and rage.
Then, from my left, I heard Leila mutter under her breath, low and lethal, “Yeah, that nigga sweet alright… dick-in-the-ass-loving ass, cheating ass, woman-hating ass bitch.”
Elias choked mid-sip, water catching in his throat as he coughed into his fist, trying not to laugh aloud.
I nearly broke character, trying to hold my snort in.
That tension in my chest cracked just a little, just enough to let the light in.
Leila arched a brow and gave me the side-eye like, ‘You’re welcome’.
“He’s lucky I’m in uniform,” Elias muttered next, finally composed, voice low and sharp, and it shot a chill down my spine. Not because I was scared, but because I knew that wasn’t just a comment. That was a promise to behave… for now.
Then the judge called us up… I stood, my knees trembling under the weight of my own fear.
My breath caught in my throat, shallow and uneven.
My skin prickled like the AC was blowing straight through my bones.
Elias’s hand ghosted over my lower back again, not pushing me forward, but letting me know he’d catch me if I fell.
“Get your crown straight, baby,” he murmured, his lips close to my ear. “This your moment. Not his.”
I inhaled slowly, smelling the faint mix of cologne and sweat on Elias, spiced woods and warm amber, clean laundry folded into strength. He always smelled like safety, even in chaos.
The judge’s voice pulled me out of the moment. “Miss Jacobson,” she said, not even glancing up, “you’re requesting a permanent protective order?”
“Yes, your honor.” My voice cracked just slightly, a fracture from the past few days.
“Your statement says you’re a detention deputy for Self Ridge County Sheriff’s Office?”
I hesitated.
And that was the moment it hit me. This wasn’t just about Kam and me. This courtroom, this statement, this filing; it might cost me everything I’d worked for.
I cleared my throat. “Yes, ma’am.”
She looked up now, brows raised. “You understand filing this order could result in your involvement in a departmental internal review, correct? You’re aware of possible employment repercussions?”
My voice caught in my chest like a sob I wasn’t ready to release. “Yes.”
And just like that, the floor under my feet tilted because, while I was trying to save my peace, the badge I wore, the job I bled for, might treat my pain like a liability. They might not care that I was the victim. Just that I brought attention.
As the judge reviewed my statement, my ears filled with white noise.
I watched the words she read like they weren’t mine.
Like they belonged to some other woman with the same name.
The one who got dragged by her wrist and slammed against a shelf in a grocery store.
Who flinched when someone moved too fast behind her.
Who kissed a man that wasn’t her abuser and still cried later because her body didn’t know the difference yet.
Kam’s attorney stood, oily voice slipping through the room like a rat. “Your honor, we object to the restraining order on grounds of hearsay and lack of physical evidence—”
“That’s a lie!” I snapped before I could stop myself, voice sharp enough to slice the silence clean in half.
The judge raised a hand. “Miss Jacobson. Please remain composed.”
Elias placed a hand on the small of my back again. Not to calm me, just to anchor me. The heat of his palm seeped into my skin like sunlight through a window I hadn’t realized I needed.
The judge turned back to Kam’s lawyer. “There are medical records, witness statements from multiple bystanders, and a responding officer’s report. Your objection is noted. Overruled.”
I exhaled for the first time in minutes.
She tapped her gavel once. “Restraining order granted. Mr. Sweets is to have no contact, direct or indirect. Any violation will result in immediate arrest.”
Kam’s smirk finally faded. He stood too fast, tried to speak, but the bailiff shut that down with a stern warning and a firm hand on his shoulder.
The judge dismissed us, and I turned to Elias like my knees might give out.
“You did it,” he whispered. “You did more than survive. You reclaimed your name, your voice, your story.”
We walked out in silence, his arm firm around me again. The courtroom behind us disappeared, but the thoughts in my head stayed loud.
We got back to his truck, and I just… froze.
The sky was dull gray, overcast and sticky, like the clouds were grieving too.
“Get in, baby,” Elias said, opening the passenger door for me like he always did, like it was second nature to protect me even when I didn’t ask for it.
But I didn’t move.
“What’s wrong?” His voice dropped low. Not scared. Not impatient. Just open.
“What if I lose my job?” I asked quietly, not looking at him. “What if Internal Affairs pulls my file? What if someone says I’m a liability? That I got involved with a detective and brought drama to the department?”
He sighed and closed the passenger door slowly. He walked around and stood in front of me, hands in his pockets like he was holding back fire.
“You think I give a damn about that badge if it means losing you?” he asked, voice a mixture of anger and ache. “You think I won’t walk out of that precinct today if they so much as breathe sideways at you?”
I looked up at him, lips trembling. “It’s not just you. It’s EJ, too. What if I put you in danger? What if they come after your job? What if I’m the reason y’all lose your stability?”
His jaw flexed. “We’ll rebuild from nothing before I let you walk away from me ’cause of fear. You hear me?”
I tried to blink away the tears, but they came anyway. “You deserve peace, Elias. I’m not trying to be no storm.”
“Baby, you are my peace,” he said, stepping closer.
“You think I don’t know how to handle storms?
I was born in chaos. Raised in fire. I’m not scared of what love costs.
I’m scared of what it costs not to have it.
” He cupped my face, thumbs brushing beneath my eyes like he was catching my tears before they fell too far.
“I done buried a woman I love before. Stood over a casket and wished I could rewind time. I’ll be damned if I let fear bury another good thing.
If they come for your job, I’ll go to war.
If they come for mine, I’ll stand on business.
” He leaned in, forehead to mine. “If it’s me, you, and EJ against the world…
then the world just gon’ have to get jumped. ”
I choked out a watery laugh, and he kissed it away. His lips were soft but strong, full of a promise that didn’t need ink or a witness.
Later that night, I sat on his couch with my knees tucked under me, a blanket around my shoulders, and EJ nestled on the other side of me watching cartoons with crumbs on his shirt. Elias was in the kitchen making tea and still glancing over at me like I might disappear if he blinked too long.
Leila texted,
You good, sis? I got memes and Hennessy if not.
Then Jason:
He better not be touching my sister like that clown. I’m just saying. I like that dude but I got a shovel.
I smiled, tucked my phone away, and looked back at Elias.
He walked over, handed me my mug, and slid down beside me. His arm went around me like second nature. I leaned into it like it was home.
“You still think you dangerous to me?” he asked, voice soft.
“Yes,” I whispered. “But I think I might be worth fighting for.”
“You always have been, Deputy Gorgeous.”
And in that moment—messy, complicated, heart-bruised and healing—I believed him.