Chapter 19
Skipping town was the first thought on my mind.
There’s a bag packed, waiting on my bed and everything.
I don’t know where I’ll go, there’s not a single corner of this state where my father won't be able to find me. And when he shows up, realizes there’s no band and that it’s just me in a corner with a playlist for tonight’s ball—well, I don’t really want to think about it.
Because while my father may not like to acknowledge me, this is one fuck up I’m sure he’ll make a scene about.
I reached out to every event planner in Northern California for resources.
I combed through social media, looking for anything remotely resembling a band for tonight, and came up empty.
Not even a Tesla cover band was available.
I was ready to swallow my pride and beg Nolan to pay some exorbitant fee for a last minute DJ but there was no point because no one was available.
It’s like the universe was toying with me. How many parties and events could there possibly be tonight that everyone is booked? At least if my father murders me, it will be in a lavish event space and I’ll look phenomenal.
For a moment while getting ready, I contemplated not even putting on the dress Nolan bought.
As if denying myself the simple pleasure of wearing it makes up for my colossal screw up.
There were a few drab looking black dresses hanging in the back of my closet I could have worn instead, but for some reason my heart ached while looking at the deep red gown laid out on my bed. In the end, the organ in my chest won.
Of course it fits like a glove. Of course after slipping into my heels and lining my lips with a matching shade of red, I looked at myself and felt beautiful. And of course Nolan was the first person I thought of once I was ready.
And I hated how much I wanted to show him.
Because soon Nolan will walk through the ballroom doors, along with half the town, and we won’t be anything to each other.
Despite anything we might have said the other night.
Meaningless words whispered in a moment that faded away with the stars.
A fluke in time because when I woke in the morning, he was gone.
I’m wallowing in my own self pity, walking around the table, adjusting silverware that was already straight, when a voice comes from behind me.
“Excuse me, Ma’am, do you know where we’re supposed to set up?”
Guests aren’t meant to show up for another thirty minutes and as far as I know, all the vendors are accounted for.
Cupid is so small that I genuinely know what everyone looks like and even if I didn't, the man standing before me is someone I would remember. With his ice blonde hair tousled with lazy precision and haunting blue eyes. This sudden stranger appears to have walked off a runway, straight into this ballroom and I can’t for the life of me figure out why.
“I’m sorry, but we’re not expecting any more vendors. What are you here for?”
The mystery man twists to the side, looking around the room as if it’s obvious why he’s here. Only then do I register the guitar strapped to his back. He looks back to me, apprehension splashed across his face. “I’m Ryker, my band just needs to know where to set up.”
Thank Cupid, it’s a Valentine’s Day miracle.
My brain rattles as I sputter and shake my head looking for something to say. “I don’t know—I—how—”
“We just need to know where to set up, Ma’am.”
Three more men walk into the room, all with instruments strapped to them or equipment being rolled on a cart.
I have no idea where they came from but I’m not stupid enough to turn them away.
I gesture toward the stage, and in record time they’re set up, and different chords are ringing throughout the room as they run a sound check.
Even though I’m smiling ear to ear so hard my cheeks hurt, I feel as if I might actually cry.
“Have I told you how much I love your smile,” a familiar timbre says from behind me.
My body flushes, his presence pulling a reaction from me before I can even turn to look at him.
When I swirl around, the satin train of my dress spinning out with me, I’m almost knocked off my heels at the sight of him.
Nolan’s suit is darker than a velvety midnight sky, his piercing blue eyes the only color on him. Tiny crinkles deepen around his eyes as his lips unfurl in a slow smile as he drags his gaze down my body. “You look beautiful, Harper.”
Before I can answer, another voice cuts through. “Hey, Nolan, right?” Ryker calls out as he jumps off the stage and struts over to us. Nolan pulls me back and tucks me into his side, resting a heavy hand on my hip. A small move with an inescapable message; I’m his.
The two men shake hands and I’m left a bit bewildered.
“Thank you so much for giving us a chance, we really appreciate it.”
“No problem, Maxine said you're good and that’s all we needed to know. This is Harper, she’s the Director of Recreations in Cupid and put on this whole event.” Ryker quickly shakes my hand and I barely get out a ‘thank you’ before he’s heading back to the stage to finish setting up.
I turn to Nolan. “How—”
“There’s yet to be a problem Maxine can’t solve. I drove out to see her yesterday and begged for help.”
“But why?”
His next statement came quickly but not a word was rushed. It was a steady proclamation, the kind that sticks with you years down the road. The moment you know changes everything. “There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you, Harper.”
Reality slips away at his words.
My entire life, I’ve weaved in and out of people’s lives, stealing glimpses of what it’s like to be wanted and keeping them for myself.
Tucking little pieces of what it's like to have somebody into my back pocket because I never knew when it would be my turn. I’ve spent so long trying to do everything myself with no one to lean on and here he was, helping me when I didn’t even ask.
Offering me the soft landing I’ve been dreaming of.
A lifetime spent wondering why no one was on my side, and with his one simple statement, Nolan unties all of my self doubt, letting it fall from my shoulders like a discarded cloak.
One sentence from him and I want to spill my heart's secrets and bargain with the devil to let me keep him.
“I don’t know what to say,” I say, my voice, breathless. Behind me a faint chatter grows louder as guests start to wander in. The lights dim, signaling the night is about to begin but all I want is more time in this small snow globe of a moment.
“Harper, I—”
“Nolan.” My father's voice booms across the ballroom and the moment slips away.
Before Nolan turns to him, his fingertips sweep down my forearm. “I should go. ”
I nod, and then he’s gone.
My feet ache, my cheeks burn from smiling, and my heart is so full I can barely stand it. Every minute that’s passed since Nolan walked away has been flawless. Each person I’ve talked raved; about the decor, the band, and of course the amount of money we’ve raised for the town.
The band, who I now know is called Gravestone Odyssey, is incredible. From what I’ve picked up they’re a rock back from a few towns over, who normally perform their own songs that have a lot more screaming in them. Which I’m sure is great, but I’m thankful they’ve stuck to covers for the night.
Nolan has been elusive; I’ve caught glimpses of him throughout the night and each time I do, his eyes are already on me.
I’m dying to know what he was going to say before my father arrived.
I’m trailing along the border of the dance floor when the music switches and a softer melody streams out of the speakers.
I’m watching all the couples slow down, women draping their arms around necks and men slipping arms around waists when suddenly a hand slips into mine and I’m being pulled out onto the floor.
My gasp lets out into a soft breath when I register Nolan’s hand in mine. “What are we doing, Nolan?” I lean in to whisper, letting my hand fall from his grasp. Or at least I tried to.
He holds me tighter. The room spins as I’m twirled around and brought closer into his chest. “Dancing,” he answers.
My eyes dart around but no one seems to notice or care. “But, people will see.”
“That’s never been an issue for me.” His voice is tender and the words are more genuine than I’ve ever heard.
Relaxing into his arms is a move that requires no thought, a muscle movement developed over only two weeks.
A movement heavy with realization of finding a safe place to fall and all the regret of knowing I won’t have it for long.
But I think I’m okay with it, because this is what I wanted out of this whole glorious mess; to feel wanted.
With the warmth of Nolan’s hands sinking through the fabric of my dress and his cheek pressing gently against the top of my head I have everything I could possibly want.
The lead singer croons the words of a Cigarettes After Sex song in turn with hollow snare drum taps and deep reverberating bass guitar. I’m lulled into a hazy state I never want to come out of. “This is nice.” My voice, as dreamy as my thoughts.
Nolan’s chest expands under my face as I press further into him. “I could stay here forever, Sweet Girl.” His lips press against my hair as he murmurs the words but there’s no mistaking what he said.
When his throat bobs with a thick swallow, and his body stills under my touch, I zip up my feelings that were oozing out moments ago. This is not the stature of a man who is about to give me good news. Despite his sentiment.
“Harper, I’m twenty two years older than you,” he says as if it’s a way to explain away what’s about to happen.
I breathe out. “I know.”
“I’m your boss.”
“I know.” My heart turns to lead in my chest.
We stop dancing and he gazes down at me but there's no remorse in his eyes. “And I’ve been your dad’s friend for years.”