32. A Confession
A Confession
Remme
T oday is the day - I will finally confess my feelings to Scarlet. The time for discreet flirtations and stolen moments is over. I must know if what burns between us could truly ignite into something more.
Butterflies swarm my stomach at the thought. I, a cursed king, as nervous as a green squire! Yet the thought of laying my guarded heart bare makes me more anxious than facing an army ever could.
A soft chuckle draws my gaze to Sophia sitting by the hearth, mischief dancing in her eyes. "Who would believe it? The fearsome King Remme, conqueror of realms, felled by something as simple as young love."
I shoot her a wry glance, my pacing finally stilling. "It is far from simple, as you well know. You always see straight to the heart of things, don't you my friend?"
Her amusement fades, keen intellect weighing my words. "I see the loneliness etched beneath your strength, Remme. But this path is tangled with thorns. She is still only a participant in your tournament who is probably susceptible to your curse."
I shake my head firmly. "The trials will conclude soon and I will finally master my powers. I think I’ve figured out who it is, but am waiting for the last trial to verify. Once no more risk of harm remains, we can explore what lies between us." I meet Sophia's skeptical gaze. "I will not lose this chance at happiness. Not when I have already lost so much."
Sophia sighs, rising to stand near me. "Your curse makes any relationship dangerous. If you touch her..."
Pain lances through me at the thought. "I know," I say hoarsely. "But I am experienced in control. Simply having her near, eases the isolation like nothing else."
Sophia searches my face with those piercing eyes that see far more than most. I open my heart to her, unwilling to hide even the most vulnerable parts.
At last she nods slowly. "Your feelings run deep. Who am I to discourage you from pursuing a balm to long-borne wounds?" Her expression turns solemn. "But promise you will take care. Scarlet may become hurt in all this, and not just physically."
I clasp Sophia's hand, immensely grateful for her wisdom and honesty. "You are a true friend for speaking so plainly. I know there are many risks, but turning away from love does not guarantee safety. I must try, Sophia. She deserves that much."
Sophia's gaze softens. "As you say. I wish you every happiness, if it is meant to be." Her lips quirk wryly. "But you had better prepare an especially moving speech to win her heart."
I chuckle as nerves resurface. "I intend to. Speaking of which, I have final preparations to make." I glance out the window at the sinking sun. "Scarlet will arrive soon. Will you ensure we are not disturbed?"
Sophia inclines her head. "Of course. I will keep watch outside." Her expression grows serious once more. "And Remme...be cautious. Follow your heart, but keep your wits about you."
I smile softly, infinitely grateful for her protective presence. "Always, dear Sophia." With an encouraging squeeze of her shoulder, I sweep from the study, buzzing with anxious energy. The time has come. Tonight, I bare the fullness of my heart. May the fates be kind.
I descend through empty castle corridors to the lovers' garden kept locked and overgrown since my curse began. Tonight, I have transformed it into a haven worthy of Scarlet. Candles adorn the vine-wrapped gazebo in a warm glow. Plum blossoms and hyacinth perfume the air with sweetness. A spread of delicate fruits, cheeses and wine awaits atop embroidered linen.
Most importantly, the space is utterly private. No curious eyes or listening ears can intrude upon what will be the most vulnerable conversation of my life. Here, surrounded by beauty cultivated through neglect and time, I will finally voice the depth of longing in my soul.
At the stroke of moonrise, a hesitant footfall reaches me. I turn, breath catching as Scarlet's figure materializes on the garden path. She is resplendent in a flowing gown the deep crimson of pomegranate seeds, hair spilling loosely over her shoulders. The candlelight softens her features, wide eyes darting nervously to take in the intimate setting.
I step forward, pulse thundering. "Scarlet, thank you for coming. Please, make yourself comfortable." I gesture to the cushioned chairs and try not to reveal how desperately her answer hangs on the air between us.
She perches tentatively across from me, spine stiff as a caged bird poised to take flight. I ache to put her at ease, but first, I must speak my vulnerable truth. Clearing my throat, I begin the speech I prepared with such care:
"From the first moment we spoke, you stirred something in me I thought lost forever. At the time, I told myself it was mere curiosity at your audacity." I smile sadly. "But my heart knew better. Our every encounter kindled a growing spark, even through trials and mistrust."
I meet her eyes then, willing her to see the earnestness of my words. "You are unlike any I have ever known, Scarlet. Bold, principled, compassionate...you challenge me in ways no one else dares."
Scarlet's eyes shimmer in the candlelight. "Your Majesty, I'm flattered, but..."
Gently, I reach across the table to clasp her hand with my glove. "Please, let me finish. There is more I must say."
She watches me warily and I notice her flinch slightly, but she remains silent. I forge on through the reckless thrumming of my pulse.
"I know you still see little more than a king. But you have awakened something good in me, Scarlet. I wish to become a man deserving of your affections, a man freed of his past."
I slide from my chair to kneel before her, hesitant hope rising within me. "What I ask is simply a chance. Continue competing in the trials, remain here at the palace where I may court you properly." My voice drops to a fervent whisper. "Let me prove myself worthy of your love, for you have long ago won mine."
For a moment Scarlet simply stares, eyes shimmering with emotion. When she finds her voice, it wavers with uncertainty. “Your majesty...you honor me deeply. Truly. But this…I can’t."
Agony spears through me at her words. I cling tighter to her soft hand, desperate not to lose this lifeline. "Why? If you feel anything for me at all, please do not turn away without giving us a chance."
Scarlet's breath shudders out as she gently pulls her hand from mine. “Too many things are stacked against us. I need to focus on the trials. The cost of losing… you don’t understand. I need to focus.." Her eyes radiate sadness and something more complex I cannot name. "I am promised to another. And you...your duties must come first, as a king."
I rock back on my heels, shaken to my core. How can she speak so dispassionately of destiny and duty at a moment like this?
"Duty be damned," I retort hoarsely. "I have been king for a decade. With you by my side, we can help bring the people peace. We can create a better world for them. I know that you care for the people as well." I search her face beseechingly. "Scarlet, if you feel anything at all for me still, do not let your fear of shadows rob us of light."
Scarlet stands abruptly, chin trembling with emotion. "My king...you move me more than you know. But some risks are too profound. I am sorry."
With that, she sweeps from the garden, leaving the fragrant air cold and lifeless in her wake. I lean back heavily in the chair, breathless with grief. It feels as though she took a piece of my soul when she walked away.
Could I have misjudged her feelings so terribly? My mind races through the times we’ve been together and what I’ve seen from her so far. The unreasonable anger and protectiveness that I already felt for her after seeing her apply for the trials. Our moment under the stars baring our souls to each other. Her teasing and the tension between us as I tested her in the carraige. The queen of cups she playfully dealt me in her 'reading', hinting at introspection and unexpected new love. Seeing her broken and almost lost after the last trial had decided it for me.
So how, after all that, could doubt now crush the budding flower of hope between us? What could hold her back, if her heart yearned for me as mine does for her?
The lingering image of sorrow in her eyes haunts me. She hides something beneath the surface, some unspoken fear or burden. I wish she had opened herself to me, so we might face it together. But the fates haven’t decided it’s time, it seems.
Perhaps the differences in our stations still weigh too heavily. I see only the fierce, radiant woman, but she remains conscious of the weight of being king. Or maybe her family obligations truly do bind her too tightly. What right do I have to ask her to turn away from duty, however much it pains us both? I would help her though. There is nothing that I wouldn’t fix for her if she only asked.
But surely our connection deserves a chance to blossom before being severed so abruptly! There must be some way to bridge this vast divide separating us. I refuse to surrender so easily.
Heart aching but resolve hardened, I rise slowly and make my way back through the now oppressive gloom of the castle. The coming days may be bleak, but while breath remains in me, I will keep fighting for the woman who stirs my dormant soul. The fates have sown bitter trials before me, but with Scarlet's light still beckoning in the distance, I will endure.
Sophia's knowing eyes find mine as I pass her in the hall on my way back to my rooms. My frantic heart still yearns to chase after the golden-haired woman haunting my steps. But tonight, rest will not come easily under the stars now grown cold and remote.