Chapter 40 #2
“They denied me leave, so I had no time to grieve. I compartmentalised the best I could, did what I could to keep my mother safe, but I distanced myself from her and my new replacement sister. When you’ve seen everything that you love ripped away…
I guess it’s natural to avoid having to deal with that shit all over again.
My mother ended up meeting another man, having another girl.
” John’s fists tighten as he laughs bitterly.
“I was livid. You have to understand, our remaining females couldn’t produce girls.
The birth of a female was rare. No amount of scientific or magical intervention worked, nothing.
We were cursed—it seemed as if even Mother Nature herself wanted us to go extinct.
” John coughs again and his entire body shudders. I keep my eyes on my task.
“Yet there was my mother, popping out girls for fun, for all to see. Couldn’t she see the world as I did?
Understand the dangers? Fuck, it’s not like any of the other girls lived.
It’s not like she enhanced or saved a dying race.
I knew…I fucking knew they’d die anyway, Emma.
Born to die. It was senseless. Selfishly, I couldn’t take it.
I avoided the problem…to my shame. If I didn’t care about the two girls, it wouldn’t matter when they died in the end.
“With my mother having a new pack, a new mate, I was relieved to finally be able to wash my hands completely of them. My mother’s new pack could deal with the problem.
I was done. Then as you know, it all went to shit.
When they were taken, it hit me, how much I had failed them.
To find them was an impossible task, the proverbial needle in the haystack.
The possibilities of who could have taken them were endless.
Because of our status as protectors, my team and I were assigned to the task.
We chased our own tails until a call came in, a shifter claiming that he had eyes on a young female.
” John sags further into the chains and bitterness flashes across his face.
“Seeing her wolf form in your arms, I lost what little control I had. I could tell that you were a demon and I convinced myself it was all a trick. There is no excuse for what I did to you, and I will be sorry for the rest of my life.” That might not be very long if I don’t hurry.
“No wonder you rejected me.” John lets out a bitter laugh.
“I can’t keep the women in my life safe.
That’s why I let you go…I am a selfish bastard and I still couldn’t leave completely.
Seeing you safe and helping you…I told myself it was enough.
It was what I deserved. All the strength that I possess, the shifter magic, the fire magic, being a trained combatant… it doesn’t do shit.”
With his words, I’m done for…I silently cry. I tuck my head down and hide my face so he can’t see me.
“I’m an evil man. Even after you rescued her, my little sister…
I…I let her go. I couldn’t bear to even look at her.
She survived, and I hated her. I hated her for it.
I still wanted Nessa, Clare, and Gwen, not her.
I wanted my mother, not the useless, weak shadow of a wolf.
My fear and hate blinded me…yes, fear and panic rot. I am the most rotten of us all.”
My tears drop onto my hands. I can’t stop them from falling, and every tear is for John.
“Please, Emma, tell my sister I was wrong. Tell her I love her and that I am proud of her. I’ve tried, but…her mate said he’d rip my head off if I attempted to talk to her before she was ready. Now it’s too late, but she might listen to you.”
If I could swap places with him, I’d do it in a heartbeat.
This is horrible. I hate how useless I feel.
On the day I admit my love for him I have to see him like this, hear his confession.
I can feel his energy slowly ebbing away, a wisp of pattering raindrops compared to its usual crashing wave. It’s not bloody fair.
“You will tell her yourself. I promise I will speak to her, and we will have… urm…dinner.”
My guilt thrums through me. I did this…I need to get him out of here and somewhere safe. My determination feeds energy into my magic, spurring it on, and the cuff clicks open and releases its grip on his legs. I sob in relief, then cringe as I gently peel the spikes away from his legs.
One down.
Now that I know what I’m doing, I send my magic to each lock simultaneously instead of slogging my way up his body. We haven’t got long before the guards get brave enough and storm in here.
Finally, the locks on the evil silver cuffs pop open, and they tear away from his blackened skin with a squelch. At the sound, I cough and heave. Oh, God. My chest painfully tightens as John’s blood rains down on the floor around us, but he is stoic and doesn’t make a sound. Be just as brave, Emma.
I kick the cuffs away from him. His entire body sags and his legs wobble underneath him as he struggles to stay upright.
I use my body weight to hold him up against the wall so he doesn’t fall.
“Sit down on the floor and get your breath back.” He nods and I help guide his huge, muscly frame down onto the concrete floor.
John flops back against the wall. I cup the back of his head to make sure he doesn’t bang it.
His breathing is shallow, and where John’s skin is not black, it’s overly pale.
He is still bleeding. “I got you,” I whisper.
“Remember our conversation in the rain? When the fae assassins almost killed me.” John nods.
I wipe the black blood from his lips with a trembling hand.
“At the time, you told me I had to fight; I had to promise that I would never give up. Don’t make a hypocrite out of yourself, John Hesketh,” I say with a growl.
“You are not dying today, I will not let you.”
“You can’t fucking forgive me for what I did.”
“Too late. I already have.”
It’s then that I hear the footsteps.
The vampires are coming.
I step in front of John, blocking the door from him. If the vampires want to throw potions at my hellhound, they will have to get through me first.