Chapter 4
Elariya
“The Stranger Cloaked in Shadows”
Grandmother spent the last two days looking for the wraith. Thankfully she found no trace of it lingering in Gryffyn Forest. Or the mortal realm.
After, low-key, using her magic to scan every inch of the realm, she assured us it was no longer here. But we knew that didn’t mean it wouldn’t return. Nor that our troubles were over.
It had been the longest two days of my life. Time had stood on the edge with me, prolonging each second so it felt like years had passed.
In the same breath, time seemed to have sped up in all the wrong ways and now, tonight, was the eve of Thayden’s visit. He’d be here by tomorrow with his entourage of family and courtiers in preparation for our engagement celebration.
Ugh, I couldn’t believe the time had come so soon. The thought of seeing him and putting on that act like I was fine with being with him made my stomach curdle like spoiled milk.
On top of everything that was happening, I didn’t know what to expect.
In the real world, Thayden had visited months ago and was in Stormfell often, but in my world, I didn’t have any memories of seeing him since I was fifteen.
Conundrum was too meager a word to call this situation. It was more like a catastrophe. And I felt like I was going along for a wild ride on the edge of a mountain with my hands tied behind my back.
Emabelle, in her good-natured way, had suggested an evening out at the Gilded Stag, our local tavern and comfort hangout. She’d thought we both needed some air and that I needed to get out of the manor to take my mind off what was going on.
Mother agreed, provided Borsari, my father’s senior guard, accompanied us.
We’d been here for close to an hour now. Emabelle and I had grabbed a table to ourselves while Borsari kept a close eye on us from the bar.
The Gilded Stag might not have been my first choice as I wasn’t in the mood to be around noisy people, but I had to admit it was a welcomed break.
And it was better than being home.
Grandmother and Mother were still giving me the unbearable silent treatment that made me feel so much worse.
The scathing look Mother gave me just before we left was still burning my skin and Grandmother’s silence still cut deep. She hadn’t even looked at me when I told her I was leaving.
I’d hurt them, but I was aware Grandmother was especially disappointed because I’d gone behind her back and read her grimoire. I knew she blamed herself for what I’d done. She’d always been such a huge magical influence in my life. Even before the curse.
Mixed beings like me, born in the mortal lands, are supposed to have their magic bound until they turn twenty-one. Then they have the choice of either living in the magical realm where they kept their powers, or staying in the mortal realm, where they'd need to strip their powers completely.
Mother had wanted to strip my magic from birth because she would never allow me to live in the magical realm on my own.
Grandmother argued against it, year in year out, insisting it was wrong to take away a vital piece of me.
She wanted me to have the option to make the choice.
She knew me, knew I’d never give my powers up willingly—regardless of how long I stayed in the mortal realm. No doubt she’d changed her mind now.
She and Mother were probably planning to strip my powers before the wedding.
I feared that discussion and I wasn’t in the mood to fight about everything else, so I chose to come here with Emabelle and pretend my life wasn’t falling apart.
The tavern buzzed with low chatter and the clinking of mugs. The warmth of the hearth and cheerful ambiance battled the crisp night chill seeping through cracks in the misty gray walls, as if the room itself wanted to convince me I wasn’t unraveling. I could almost relax here. Almost.
Emabelle offered me a hopeful smile and nudged the plate closer, sending the scent of spiced pumpkin pie curling into the air. “Come on, eat up. You’ll feel a lot better.”
I’d had very little appetite over the last few days, possibly another side effect of portaling, or it could just be my intense worrying, but I humored her by cutting off a small piece and taking a bite.
Instantly, the sweet, decadent taste of pumpkin and spices melted on my tongue, tantalizing my taste buds in a way that could make a girl forget she had the weight of the world pressing on her shoulders.
Gods be good, if only my problems could be fixed with a slice of pumpkin pie. I’d eat a hundred.
“Wow, this is absolutely delicious.” I smiled back at her, savoring the scrumptious flavor as it continued to intrigue my senses.
“It always is.” Emabelle giggled and poured me a mug of mulberry ale from the large stoneware jug she’d insisted on us getting to share. “Now, have some of this. It will hit the spot.”
Again, I did as requested, and she was right. The tangy, flavorful ale took the raw edge off the angst that was still gripping at my insides. A pleasant buzz bloomed over the sullen overcast of my mind, and the mulberries amplified the sweetness of the pie.
“Feel a little better?” Emabelle gave me that reassuring look she’d been casting my way since the argument.
“Yeah.” I nodded, appreciating her efforts to take care of me.
“I wish I could do more for you.”
“You’ve done enough.”
“With sweet pie and ale?” She chuckled, waving a hand over the remaining pie.
“It did hit the spot.”
She had done enough, even with the small things like this outing tonight. It helped in some way. I couldn’t ask for more.
We’d always been as close as sisters could be. She came to live with us when she was five after her parents died at sea. My family welcomed her as their own. That's why she called my grandmother hers too.
Things would change now that we were both of marrying age.
I would go first. Then she would follow in the new year when my mother arranged her marriage.
Although I was sure we’d visit each other as often as we could, it was scary to think of what the world would be like without us seeing each other every day, but that was the new life we had ahead of us. It would just be so much worse for me.
“You’ll be okay tomorrow. I mean when Thayden gets here. I’m actually looking forward to his visit. If nothing else, it’ll take the heat off the stress at home.”
“I suppose that’s one good thing.”
Her smile thinned. “I’m sorry. That was selfish of me. I know you’re freaking out about him.”
“I understood what you meant.”
“Oh, good. It’s just that your mother is more relaxed when Thayden and Mattieu are around and people like Chancellor Blackthornetend to leave us alone. Their presence will help take the pressure off everything and may even get Blackthorne off our backs.”
Even I had to agree. Thayden was a knight who’d served King Varis for years. Mattieu, Thayden’s father, was a High Lord in Zyvaris. Everyone including Blackthorne and Friar Jameson revered them.
“I just have to get my head around everything else.” I bit the inside of my lip, trying to tune out the gravity of what awaited me.
“And you will. You’re determined like that.”
“I’m not so sure being determined will be enough to help me.” I took another swig of ale. “I mean, what am I actually going to do, Emabelle?”
She sighed, resting her hands in her lap. “I don’t know what to tell you.”
I wouldn’t know what to say to me, either, if I were her.
“It’s okay. If things were supposed to be different, the spell would have worked.
” I lowered my voice even though we had the added privacy of being seated at the back of the tavern, where there weren’t many people.
Couldn’t be too careful, though. Blackthorne had his spies everywhere.
“You’ll never know that for sure.”
“No, I won’t. But I felt it should have worked. I did everything right. There was even a moment when the spell looked like it was working, then the wraith attacked like a freaking wildcard with a vengeance.”
“You’re lucky you didn’t get killed,” she scoffed with a deep frown. “What you did was so damn reckless, Elariya. And you went out all by yourself.”
“Would you have gone with me?” I gave her a deadpan stare, knowing the answer.
“Of course not, but I wished I had the chance to talk you out of it.”
“I wouldn’t have given you that chance.”
“Please tell me you aren’t thinking of doing something crazy.”
“No.” The hollowness in my voice came from deep within. No one had to worry about me doing anything crazy. Despite the desire I had to get my life and my father back, I knew I’d done enough damage. I wasn’t looking to do any more.
“Promise me you won’t, Elariya.” Emabelle cocked her head and gave me a piercing, pleading stare. “That wraith thing could come back if it thinks you took something.”
Little thief…
Those crippling words were still ringing through my soul like a never-ending echo.
Little thief, little thief, little thief…
On and on and on the words went, and I almost couldn’t wait for the curse to kick in again so I could forget.
To add to the shit, there was more to worry about when it came to magic. “You don’t have to worry about me doing anything.” My voice dropped a beat lower. “I can’t feel my magic anymore.”
Emabelle’s eyes rounded to murky wide pools of confusion. “What do you mean, you can’t feel it?”
“I haven’t since I woke up. It’s like it’s … gone.” There hadn’t even been a spark.
I used to be able to levitate small objects and make flowers bloom. Nothing impressive, but I could manage the basics. I couldn’t do either of those things now.
That’s why I was so worried Grandmother would strip my powers. If she did, there’d be no hope of my magic returning.
“I don’t think you can just lose it.”
“I didn’t think so either but maybe I burned myself out from portaling.”
“Maybe.”
To me, magic felt like the very air around us. I could sense its particles floating, shimmering just beyond sight. Grandmother said it was different for everyone. For her, it had a taste.