Chapter 25 – Bellamy
BELLAMY
My eyes open, and the night air outside my window is still dark. I feel unsettled. There is a rustling in me, and I need to work it out.
Sebastian and I had no further talk of marriage or babies—babies!
Gah!—and after the children openly accepted me as their father’s girlfriend—cue total freak-out—we spent the rest of the night together, having dinner and playing games.
He even kissed my cheek in front of them, and Phaedra got a look in her eyes that told me she didn’t mind it one bit.
The only thing weighing me down now is my father.
I’m not sure what’s best for him or for me at this point.
I haven’t accepted what’s happening to him, but I also can’t imagine not being with him during it.
Do I move him in here as Sebastian offered?
Is that safe for him? Is it even practical?
I don’t know. I just know I have to do more for him than I’m doing now.
Then there’s also this Christmas ball and all that comes with announcing to the global community that I’m dating the king of Messalina. It feels as if everything is coming at me all at once, and while most of it is a dream come true, the uncertainty is what’s plaguing my mind.
Climbing out of bed, I throw on my yoga wear and fly down the stairs to the gym.
No one is here yet. Not Sebastian or even Althea, and I can’t deny being relieved by that.
I think I need a few moments alone to really sort through everything in my head.
I push my body on the treadmill and then lift weights.
By the time Althea arrives, I’m a sweaty, exhausted heap of a woman.
“Sorry,” I murmur, feeling bad I didn’t wait for her to get started.
She smirks, standing by the door, but then her eyes narrow in on my neck, and her lips part in a silent gasp.
Shit. I can’t believe I forgot to cover that.
What was a small red mark yesterday from Sebastian’s belt has morphed into a bruise today.
My hand slaps over my neck, but it’s too late.
She’s in front of me, prying my fingers away and touching the purple skin gently with her fingers.
“He did this to you?”
“It’s fine. It doesn’t hurt.”
“Tell me at once if my nephew is hurting you.”
I sigh, my head falling forward. I can only imagine how this looks to her. “Althea, it’s not like that. He’s not abusing me,” I promise. “He’s an incredible man.”
“But…” Her voice trails off, uncertainty splashed across her face. “He does this to you on purpose?”
I blush ten thousand shades of pink, red, fuchsia, and everything in between, ridiculously mortified. “Yes.”
She tilts my chin this way and that, examining me closer before meeting my eyes. “His passion for you is no secret, but I worry. Women get themselves into bad situations and mistake or tolerate cruelty for love.”
“That’s not what this is. I assure you.”
Her head bobs as she digests what I’m saying. “You like this, then? I’m not judging. I’m trying to understand so, well, I understand.”
“Yes,” I manage. “I like it. If I didn’t or I wasn’t comfortable, he wouldn’t do it. He was…marking me as his, I guess.”
She curses in French. “You’re telling me the truth? Because if he’s hurting you against your permission, king or no king, he’s still my nephew and I can punish him accordingly.”
I rein in my smirk at the imagery with that. “It’s consensual.”
“Daccord. Okay. Fine. I won’t ask any further questions because, frankly, I’m terrified of knowing the answers.
” She gives an exaggerated shudder. “But for now, you must rush back upstairs and cover that neck either with clothing or makeup before the children or the prime minister see it. The country already believes Sebastian to be a beast and these markings will only prove that.”
“True. Thank you.”
I move to leave, desperate to flee from this awkward moment, when she reaches out and grasps my wrist, stopping me.
“You can talk to me,” she says, her expression sincere.
“You can talk to me about anything. I know what it’s like to be alone and not have many people in your life.
My sister was all I had for a very long time and now…
well, she’s not who she once was. She has no time or patience for anyone, too stuck in her grief.
But I’m here for you, Bellamy. Whether this thing with Sebastian is for now or forever, I’m here for you. ”
I blow out an uneven breath, my heart clogging my throat as tears threaten like weapons.
“Thank you,” I choke out and hug her. She’s my person in a way, and I hope she knows I am that for her, too.
Something I tell her in earnest, so I’m positive she does.
We hold each other for another moment, and she gives me a playful shove toward the door.
“Now go. Please. That neck…mon dieu.”
I snicker and leave her in the gym, racing quickly along the first floor of the palace, through the sweeping room where I broke the bust those months ago, and over toward the side stairs that lead up to the bedrooms. Only I don’t make it to the stairs.
I hardly make it through the huge sweeping room before someone calls my name.
The last person on the planet I want to see right now.
Samil.
“Bellamy,” he croons, marching with heavy, determined steps in my direction after entering the palace. “Just the woman I was hoping to run into.”
He’s alone. None of the other members of his cabinet or parliament are with him. Not even his handler is here. He wasn’t set to arrive until around ten, and it’s not even seven.
What the hell is he up to?
“Good morning. I’m sorry, I can’t stop to talk now.” I head for the stairs as a nauseating wave of panic hits me.
“Bellamy, wait,” he cries, quickening his steps. “Why are you running from me?”
Shit. “I’m not,” I call back to him, hoping my tone isn’t as strained as I think it sounds. “I’m late to get the children ready for the day.”
“No, you’re running,” he accuses, and rightly, because I am.
I have no doubt how guilty and foolish it makes me appear.
“Stop!” He catches up to me, jogging the last few steps, and his hand latches onto my forearm, pulling me to a standstill.
“I haven’t seen you in months now and I thought we were friends. Why do you not wish to speak to me?”
I tilt my chin down and away from him, hoping he doesn’t see the mark. Why didn’t I put on a turtleneck or cover it with makeup? Why was I so anxious to get down to the gym? Now look.
“That’s not the case at all,” I tell him, compelling a smile. “Truly, I’m running late.”
“Only your pulse is racing.” His fingers press in on my wrist, proving his point. “And there is fear in your eyes, Bella.” He tilts my chin up until I’m forced to meet his eyes. “I am not the one you should be afraid of.”
I shake my head, growing tired and frustrated. I yank my arm away from his grasp. “I’m not afraid, Samil. Now, please, if you’ll excuse—”
He doesn’t let me go. Instead, he regrabs my arm, firmer this time, and forcefully drags me to an alcove between the main room and the entrance, just off another parlor. Aggressively, he shoves me into the corner of the wall and gets right up in my face.
“You’re hurting me,” I accuse, narrowing my eyes at him. “I haven’t given you permission to touch me. You’re out of line.”
“Out of line,” he repeats, testing the words only to smile at them as if they amuse him.
His body is still. Too still. The stillness of a predator about to spring on his prey.
The only things moving are his eyes as they rove around my face.
It’s the most unsettling thing I’ve ever encountered.
He’s not the same sort of hunter as Sebastian, and I have no desire to be his next meal.
My impatience to flee him takes over, and I shove at him, but to no avail.
“What are you doing? Let me go.”
I know there are cameras everywhere. Sebastian told me. But right now it’s just the two of us alone, and I doubt there are cameras trained on this tiny alcove he has us in.
Realization dawns on his face, the tense energy between us cresting and breaking. He sighs, releasing my arm but not my body from the alcove.
“I’m trying to speak to you, and you can’t get away from me fast enough,” he says, his voice calmer now, almost dejected. He tsks, shaking his head in dismay. “You’re why I came early.”
“Me? Why?”
“Because I haven’t stopped thinking about you since we first met. You’re special to me.”
I puff out a breath. “Somehow I don’t think that’s the case.”
Samil squints, his eyes searching mine, and he says, “You don’t like me and there is only one explanation for it. What poisonous lies did he fill you with about me?”
“I don’t know what you’re—”
He cuts me off by pressing me deeper into the wall, almost to the point of pain as my back digs into the stone.
“Don’t lie to me,” he snarls, the rest of his polish and finesse gone.
“I know he told you something. Don’t think for a second I don’t see the pretty mark he left on your neck.
I know what you’re doing with him, and I can see what he’s doing with you, even if he denies it. ”
“Samil, please give me my space.”
“You’re a shameful little toy to him. Nothing more. He lies about you to everyone. And yet you give him your body. Why?”
His words slice, but they don’t cut through me. I remain silent, and he holds my unrelenting gaze for another second, only to nod in understanding. He moves back a step even as his hands press into the wall on either side of me, bracketing me in. He’s not letting me escape.
“He told you I loved Nora. Didn’t he?”
“Yes,” I admit.
He bobs his head, his expression broken. “I did love her. I still love her. I’ll always love her. He knew how I felt about Nora, and he took her from me. He was my friend, and he didn’t care about how I felt.”
I don’t know what to say to that, so I stand here in silence.
“He owes me, Bella. He owes me greatly.”