Chapter 20
Wolfe
“Where Possibilities Break”
Imaterialized in my office, barely containing the rage roiling within me.
The walls shook as my shadows flicked out around me, spilling remnants of what I was desperately trying to hold back.
Everyone had looked at me like I’d lost my mind. I’d known that would happen. It was expected.
So was Elariya’s reaction.
I never believed she’d be on board with practically becoming my prisoner again, especially not with her family still sitting in the line of fire.
Fuck. I’d wrestled with the decision since my heart-to-heart with Kaem. But the more I turned over his counsel—that a king did what he needed to do to protect his kingdom—the more keeping Elariya here felt right.
I’d come close to agreeing with Alaric and the others, but my gut and my heart told me otherwise.
I wouldn’t deny it. I was biased. I was selfish. I wanted Elariya here with me. And I knew what I did seemed like an asshole move, given her family situation. But I had to believe I’d find a way.
I had to believe I’d find some way—fast—that protected them and still kept Elariya here.
And if I couldn’t find a sane path, I’d bring war to Thayden’s doorstep. I wouldn’t care that he might have been an important lead in getting closer to my enemies.
Until then, I would keep Elariya.
I drew in a sharp breath, trying to still my thoughts.
Just now, when I held her, I’d shown too much emotion. Too much of the pain inside.
I’d borrowed words she didn’t remember, telling her it hurt less. She’d uttered those same words to me weeks ago, before I took the plunge to be with her. Back then, her eyes were alive with the growing feelings I’d fought so hard to ignore.
Now the cruel void I’d been seeing since her reset was eating me alive.
She was the one stuck in a memory loop. She was the one who had to restart her life over and over again with every new moon. But I was the one standing in the nothingness.
So, I meant what I said. I’d rather have her hate me than look at me as if I meant nothing to her at all.
The fucking nothingness in her eyes cut deeper than the sword wedged into my heart in Morg?ven.
Still bracing myself, I moved toward my desk. Before I reached it, Arielle stepped out of a portal, her hands balled at her sides, her body shaking with rage.
“You bastard. You did it to me again.” She shook her head at me.
I wished I could’ve said I didn’t know what she meant. But I did.
“I did what needed to be done,” I replied.
“You asshole. You made me look like the bad guy. You left Elariya on the ship with me, knowing all along what you’d planned.”
Yeah. She was right.
The moment I’d sensed we were approaching the space between realms, I’d summoned everyone except her and told them about the meeting. Then I’d asked Kaem to deliver the message, to bring Arielle and Elariya back here to Vyrenth Hollow.
I hadn’t wanted to argue on the ship, and I hadn’t wanted to see Elariya first. It would’ve made it harder. So, I’d left her with someone who could make her feel safe and comfortable, preparing her for the moment the shit hit the fan.
Arielle stepped closer. “You made me your royal advisor, and you call me part of this Veythral, yet you don’t share important information with me.”
“Arielle—”
She held up a hand. “No, Wolfe. If you bore any love for me, you would have told me where your heart lay.”
“I excluded you because you wouldn’t have agreed.” I exhaled hard. “You would’ve known straightaway that I was going to keep Elariya.” The guys knew, too. They just didn’t say anything. They waited for confirmation. But they knew.
Arielle pressed a hand to her heart. “Wolfe, I have so few friends. The other mages loathe me because I’m advanced beyond my years and I work with you.
I’ve known Elariya for a little over a month, and she’s probably the best friend I’ve ever had.
” Her voice cracked. “And you… you just made me look like someone who couldn’t be trusted. Again.”
“That was not my intention.”
“I promised her she could go home, and she believed me. She put her trust in me with no memory of who I was,” she stuttered. “How will she see me now?”
I’d be a bastard if I didn’t agree with her. I felt the pain in her words, and worse, her disappointment in me.
“I went to hell and back to find you, and you treat me like shit,” she snapped. “You have no idea how worried I was when I thought you were dead, yet I held on to hope that we’d find you. We did, and all you can do is become this asshole dictator who tells us to leave if we don’t agree with you.”
The door opened, cutting off any further conversation.
Bastian entered—always following Arielle. She looked back at him, the scowl on her face deepening.
“Did you know about this?” she demanded. “Did you know he was going to keep her?”
“I did. But not because he told me,” Bastian replied, his gaze flicking between us.
He went to put an arm around her, but she flinched and moved away, disappointment flickering across her face, at him too.
“Love,” Bastian said, using a gentle tone I’d only ever heard him use with her, “let’s go back downstairs and give Wolfe some space. He’s still healing.”
“No.” Arielle waved a fist at him. “You always do this to me. You always let him get away with everything. Even when you know I’m right.”
“Sweetheart, we are bound to follow Wolfe.” Bastian’s voice stayed calm. “I assume you still want to follow him because you’re still here.”
Arielle scowled, her eyes blazing. “And if I changed my mind and left now—”
“I would leave with you,” Bastian said before she could even finish.
I wasn’t surprised by his words, but it still knocked me off balance. I’d known him for as long as I’d been alive. He’d been more than my best friend; he’d been my brother.
“So, if we leave now, Wolfe loses two more members of his family,” Bastian continued. “The mage he thinks of as a sister and his second-in-command. If anything were to happen to him and Alaric, Galaythia would fall.”
Time slowed to a crawl as I waited for her response. Was I about to lose them both?
When she looked back at me, I saw it in her eyes, something I’d never seen before: a shimmering cloud of indecision. It told me that even if she stayed, I was still on the brink of losing her.
“I’m staying.” Her voice quivered. “But so help me, if anything happens to Elariya’s family, I will hate you forever, Wolfe Nightblade.”
I pressed a hand to my heart and dipped my head.
“Namaroli,” I said, using the mage endearment for my chosen one.
Among the mages, it was a rare honor—especially coming from a member of the Royal House.
Her eyes welled with tears, my intention hitting the mark.
“Do you truly believe that Elariya should go home?”
Her breath caught, and she lifted a shoulder in a helpless shrug. “I don’t know what to think anymore. I feel like I’m out of my depth and everything feels wrong.”
“It feels wrong because we’re stuck. And we’ve never been stuck before. One ill-favored decision could tip the scales the wrong way. Then all would be lost. If nothing else, I owe it to the kingdom to keep Elariya.”
“I agree, but you also want her here because you love her.”
“Yes. Yes, I do.” I would never lie or pretend otherwise. I looked at Bastian, whose gaze was still fixed on me. “You would have made the same decision if you were me. Don’t even dare try to deny it.”
“I wasn’t about to.”
“Good, because if this had been about Arielle, you wouldn’t let her go anywhere.
” My throat tightened as I swallowed. “You wouldn’t allow her to go and marry someone else because it opened a way into the enemy’s mind, or for any reason.
And you’d know the safest place she could ever be is with you. ”
Arielle trembled. She looked at the Fae warrior, who had only just opened up about his feelings for her weeks ago, and waited for his answer.
Though, neither of us truly needed it.
He’d just openly defied me, defied duty and everything he had bound himself to for her.
So, when he nodded, relief cut through me. Someone supported me.
“I would have done the very same thing,” Bastian agreed. He wasn’t looking at me. He was looking at Arielle.
This time, when he reached for her, she didn’t pull away. He touched her cheek, and she leaned into his touch.
“Go back downstairs. I’ll find you,” he said softly.
She held his gaze for a heartbeat, then turned and walked out the door.
When it clicked shut, Bastian looked back at me.
We stared at each other for a long moment before he spoke.
“I’m bound to you by blood, but…I will always choose her.” The strain in his eyes told me how difficult it was for him to admit that, even knowing what the oaths demanded of him.
“You don’t have to explain anything to me. I would expect no less of you when it comes to her.”
He dipped his head, resolute in his agreement.
I leaned against the edge of my desk, feeling a slight drop in my energy. A reminder that I wasn’t fully myself yet. “When did you know? That I was going to keep Elariya.”
“The instant we put the idea in your head.” A warm, understanding smile tugged at his lips. “You forget how well I know you.”
“I haven’t forgotten. I just…wanted to know. I’m sure Alaric will not be as understanding.”
Garrick had agreed with me all along, so I wasn’t worried about him. That aside, I knew he’d follow me blindly.
“No. Alaric will definitely not be as understanding. Your absence was an eye opener for all of us but especially for him. He saw things for what they were and had to put everything in perspective to lead us.”
I sighed, my gaze drifting to the floor. “Maybe he should still be leading you.”
“You know that’s not what I mean.” Bastian stepped closer, the floorboard creaking under his weight.
“I know what you mean. But perhaps I’m compromised because I have more than an interest in keeping Elariya here.”
“She is your reason. So, you did what you thought was right,” Bastian said quietly.
“I understand that. The Gods know I would’ve done the same for Arielle.
But be warned: make sure you know what you’re doing.
Everything comes with a price, friend. You can keep your girl safe and still lose her.
If that happens, it won’t be Thayden who takes her from you or anybody else. It’ll be you.”
The words hit deep, settling the cold truth in my chest.
I breathed out a ragged sigh and nodded. “I hear you.”
“You have my loyalty and blade. I will do my best to help you.”
I dipped my head. He did the same and left.
Finally alone, I was left to my thoughts and the weight of everything pressing down on my shoulders.
I moved over to my chair and sat. There I mulled over everything.
I thought about how I could protect Elariya’s family and end Thayden’s miserable life while finding out who’d helped him get to me.
I thought about how I’d do all of that while figuring out what the fuck was going on here in the kingdom with the dark forces, my uncle, and the fucking rebels.
I thought about the ring and how it felt even more impossible to find.
Then I thought about Elariya. Elariya and me.
That’s where I stopped.
I couldn’t see past the block in my mind.
Nor could I see how we could possibly have the happy ending she deserved.
I left the office long after night had fallen and went outside.
There I sensed her presence. I followed it to the rose garden. And that’s where I found her.
Sitting under the willow tree, she hugged her knees to her chest and gazed up at the moon.
She’d changed into one of the simple gowns from the manor. The neckline slipped off one shoulder, exposing skin that caught the moonlight like porcelain. Her blood-red hair hung in loose waves, darker in the night, stirring softly with the breeze.
Her face showed utter distress, like someone who had been slowly, thoroughly undone.
I cloaked myself in shadow and drew closer, close enough that I was a breath away from her.
Weeks ago, she was able to sense me. She couldn’t now.
Her magic was whole—possibly stronger than it had ever been even though she was still a novice. But she couldn’t sense me.
I realized it wasn’t just the magic that drew us together.
It was simply us.
A tear streamed down her cheek. I wanted to wipe it away. I wanted to assure her that I’d fix all our problems. But I couldn’t do either of those things.
How could I when I was the problem?
Fate was cruel to monsters like me. Those who walk in the shadows were never meant to find happiness.
In my desperation to protect her, I was already pushing her away.
What if the choice I’d forced on her hammered the final nail in the coffin of whatever remained between us?
The very thing I was trying to prevent—losing Elariya—might be exactly what my actions would cause.
And still…
I wanted to fight for her. Fight to keep her.
Fight to make her mine again.
My mage.