12. Lucy
CHAPTER 12
Lucy
“I—I don’t know how to pull them back,” I whispered, too scared to move and make everything so much worse than I already had. “I’ve never had to…no one—this has never happened to me before.”
Liam took a deep breath, clearly struggling, but it seemed like something in him settled as he processed my words. “Okay…I can work with that if you let me help you.”
My panic spiked as I tried not to think about what the fuck that might mean.
Liam clenched his jaw. “I may be a legacy alpha, Lucy, but I can only do so much with you filling this whole fucking room with your pheromones. Please…just this once, trust me.”
Did I really have a choice? I had no idea how to reel in my own pheromones. Even when I let them out at home, they barely changed Frankie’s scent. My presence had always been an illusion, or maybe just a phantom.
But Liam’s entire body was rigid as he fought against his instincts, and I knew exactly what I was seeing.
He found my pheromones pleasing.
Jesus fucking Christ, I couldn’t think about that, or this would end in blood because Liam looked like he was fucking starving .
“I’m scared,” I admitted, letting out a shuddering breath, but I didn’t try to pull away from him again. “I don’t know what to do.”
His grip on my face eased ever so slightly, and his eyes went from red lightning to molten lava. “I know, but it’ll be okay. You’ll be fine, I promise.”
Why did I want to believe him so badly? His voice was soothing and the vibration of it penetrated my skin until my bones hummed with the sound of him. Tears nearly spilled down my face as I fought against the part of me that felt so weak .
I was not weak – I was more than this need for an alpha I didn’t even know.
“What are you feeling?” Liam asked, his voice losing some of the growl as he sat on the floor, one leg on either side of me, but careful not to make contact.
For some reason, that empathetic consideration eased some of the tension in my body and I decided to try it his way.
“It’s hard to breathe,” I admitted, flinching when he released my face completely.
Oh, god, had I done something wrong? Was he going to do something else – something worse?
Then his hand settled on the side of my neck, almost cool against the heat of my skin, but it was gentle – barely there.
“You definitely have a fever,” Liam muttered, his eyes inspecting me from head to toe. “Anything else?”
I was speechless when he released my wrists, sliding his thumb up the inside of my forearm to push my sleeve up to my elbow. His eyes met mine when I didn’t answer right away and I didn’t understand what I was seeing.
He didn’t look like he was about to lose control anymore and I realized I didn’t hate the way it felt to be touched by him.
“Answer me, Lucy. ”
Liam pulled me closer, his intense focus hypnotizing me. I didn’t even notice what he was doing until my bare forearm was resting on his shoulder. The weird haze in my head made me slow, and I couldn’t react even when I watched him pull the adhesive away from his neck.
“This is a bad idea,” Cas muttered, making me jump.
Oh, god, I’d completely forgotten he’d been in the room with us. What the hell was wrong with me? Why was I losing my mind? Why now? What the hell was I going to do about this insane fucking situation?
“Ignore him,” Liam murmured, dropping the adhesive to the floor before pressing my wrist to his neck. “Just focus on me, okay?”
Was it safe to be around Cassius right now, or was Liam the only one who could detect my pheromones?
“Lucy, look at me.”
It was impossible to deny that soft command and I looked up into those garnet eyes, holding my breath as I waited to see what would happen.
“What do you need?” His voice was fucking mesmerizing .
I had no idea what I needed, and I tried to tell him that, but my lips couldn’t form the words.
Dropping my gaze to his neck, I tried to figure out what he was doing – what I was feeling…
My fingers curled around the back of his neck, holding onto him against my will, and I realized I was leaning forward as if I had every intention of climbing into his lap. Pulling back was a knee-jerk reaction, but Cassius was ready for it. The hard chest against my back made me stiffen and Liam smiled lazily, his garnet eyes practically liquid metal now with the way they glimmered at me.
“Just breathe,” Cassius whispered into my ear, the gravel in his voice making me shiver. “The more you resist, the more it’s going to hurt.”
That’s when I finally noticed it – the scent of sweet oranges wrapping around me. It overpowered the vanilla, but the sandalwood tickled my nose, pleasant and deep enough I could feel the weight of it settle on my eyelids, making them feel heavy.
A second later, green apples and cedar with a tiny hint of moss mixed with Liam’s.
They complemented each other so well instead of clashing like they probably should, considering how different they were, but I liked the depth and complexity. I liked the weight of it against my chest, pressing down like it was going to suffocate me, but with their pheromones wrapped around me it felt easier to breathe.
“There you go,” Liam murmured, his hand settling on my waist. “Just keep breathing. We’ll figure this out and you’ll be okay.”
Would I?
He slid his hand around to my lower back and pulled me closer. I watched him drape my other arm around his neck, eyes on mine the whole time, gauging my reaction to each and every shift and change.
“What do you need, Lucy?” Liam repeated, the words soft against my skin as he leaned back, effortlessly pulling me into his lap.
My legs draped over his thigh before I knew it and my arms were all the way around his neck. He was so fucking big, surrounding me with that strong body of his. Where he wasn’t touching me, I could feel the scorching heat coming off of Cassius.
“I don’t know what I need,” I admitted, giving in to the need to hold on tight to someone. “I don’t even know what’s wrong with me.”
“We should take her to the hospital,” Cassius muttered.
“There isn’t an omega-exclusive hospital close enough and I’m not taking her to one crawling with alphas with her scent this strong. ”
Liam’s deep growl made me remember I was alone with two unfamiliar alphas, and I had no idea where Frankie was.
“I don’t need a hospital.” I rested my head on Liam’s shoulder, so I didn’t have to see just how fucking intense he looked. “I’ll be fine as soon as Frankie comes back.”
“What does she do for you when this happens?” Liam asked as he held me.
She did exactly what he was doing, wrapping her citrusy scent around me as she held me close enough my heart started beating in time with hers…
Maybe it wasn’t my heat, but a stress cold. That was totally possible, right? It was statistically more likely than going into heat so suddenly.
Even if it was the first time I was reacting to an alpha’s pheromones.
This was just me being completely blindsided by the intensity of their scent. I had a sensitive nose, and this reaction wasn’t unusual for normal omegas, but I’d never been this sensitive before…
I’d never been this fragile .
My heart started racing again and it made me so dizzy I nearly threw up from the sensation of the room spinning around and around.
God, I couldn’t do this today. I couldn’t afford to let this happen.
I needed to go somewhere safe, but nowhere was safe. I’d never had a nest…I was completely useless as an omega.
“There’s no point going to a hospital. They’ll just tell me I’m defective – poking and prodding and touching .” Instead of trying to run and hide like I normally would, I held him tight, turning my head to press my face into his neck. “They always look at me like I’m disgusting… useless . Please don’t take me there.”
Liam’s growl was nearly subsonic and for whatever stupid fucking reason, I tensed, holding on tighter instead of running away like I definitely should have.
“You’re not defective, Lucy.”
“I am,” I whispered, breathing in that citrusy scent before I started to panic all over again. “The omega specialist told me so. She said…”
What the fuck was I doing, spilling all my secrets to him?
“What did she say?”
It was Cassius who asked that question as he settled his hand on my thigh.
That scorching heat of his seeped into my flesh and my body relaxed just a little even though I knew this was bad. Either one of them could end up being the murderer. On top of that, Liam Valor was a fucking client. How was I supposed to come back from this?
Even knowing that, all I could do was hide in Liam’s arms with my face pressed to the curve of his neck, holding onto him so tightly the bones in my fingers creaked with the strain.
“ Lucy .”
Cassius sounded like the fucking god of war every time he spoke, terrifying me and… thrilling me with the danger of it.
“She told me my omega pheromones are so muted they barely even register. That it was impossible for anyone to scent them, and if they did it would be too light to attract an alpha.”
Jesus, why was I telling them this? But I couldn’t fucking stop.
“It’s why I’m so tall and sturdy – why I didn’t become some small, delicate creature,” I confessed, bracing myself for their sudden understanding. “That's why no one can tell what I am. I don’t even have enough omega pheromones to go into heat. My first heat cycle was when I was thirteen but I’ve only had five.”
“Five?” Liam asked, his grip on me just as tight as my own.
It was weirdly reassuring.
“What does that quack know?” Cas growled. “Your pheromones are way too fucking intense. I have no idea how we’re going to get you out of here without making every alpha in a five-mile radius lose their goddamn minds.”
“We’ll stay here until she calms down,” Liam countered. “All night if we have to.”
“And if she doesn’t?”
“Then you’ll get some suppressants, and we’ll take her home after they kick in.” Liam sounded so fucking matter of fact about it, like none of this bothered him.
I had so many questions, but I was too tired to open my mouth and ask any of them. I’d done what they’d wanted and told them what that stupid bitch had said – what every doctor had told me since with varying degrees of empathy and kindness.
“We’re going to sit here like this until Frankie gets back,” Liam reassured me, his breath ruffling my hair. “Cas and I won’t let anything happen to you until then.”
I found that hard to believe when they seemed to be the only two alphas in the world who found my scent appealing.
“You’re lucky he’s a legacy alpha.” The sudden softness in Cassius’s voice surprised me, but not as much as his touch did. “Liam happens to have god-like control over his instincts. Even a scent like yours won’t make him take advantage of you.”
Gentle hands pulled my hair out of the bun. Cassius even slid his fingers through the strands to untangle my hair before taking my earrings off with such deftness I barely even noticed until the weight of them was gone.
“Are these magic-eight-balls?”
“All signs point to yes,” I whispered, smiling slightly when Cassius growled in irritation, but even that dangerous sound didn’t feel like a threat with Liam holding me like this.
I refused to think too much about why that would be when the pressure behind my eyes was finally easing. I could breathe, and my fever was a bit more bearable.
“Was it those alphas?” Cassius asked .
Liam stood, and I clung to him, suddenly nervous all over again. “What alphas?”
“Get it together, Liam. I was there with her the whole time.”
“What. Alphas .”
This time I couldn’t bite back the small whimper and Liam’s pheromones exploded outward, drenching anything and everything. They were so heavy it was like breathing through water.
“Two cops,” Cassius gritted out. “Tried to get her to leave the morgue by force.”
Was Liam’s scent affecting the other alpha?
I peeked at Cassius, surprised to see he seemed unbothered for the most part despite the density of Liam’s pheromones. He looked down at me with those bright blue eyes and his dark hair falling in his face. It made me feel like prey all over again.
“She didn’t react to their pheromones at all, even when the beta started choking so badly he had to leave. She seemed fine when we left, but it’s possible she had a latent reaction.”
“I trust you showed them what it might feel like to drown in an alpha’s pheromones?” Liam asked, suddenly moving again.
“I did,” Cassius confirmed. “I’m going to go check on James.”
Being talked about like I wasn’t there was fucking annoying, but I was too tired to say anything about it.
Liam sat down on the couch, still holding me close enough I could feel his steady heart beating against my body. It was a soothing rhythm that invited my own heart to follow suit, and shockingly it did.
It happened even faster than when Frankie held me like this.
That didn’t necessarily mean anything though. Liam was just a powerful alpha who knew how to take care of an omega. Frankie had only ever had me to practice her skills with – a defective omega.
I was finally comfortable and warm, but not too hot. Arms were around me and a scent that reminded me of rain filled the room .
Rainy days always reminded me of citrus.
Liam Valor smelled like spicy, sweet oranges and I’d never felt quite this calm before – almost like someone had slipped me a very strong benzodiazepine.
There was the soft pitter-patter of rain against the glass and the scent of spicy oranges and apples all around me, easing some of the tightness in my skin. My body was still too warm, but it no longer felt like I was melting.
Why this was working so well…
I could worry about that later. All I cared about right now was that Liam had been right. I was okay, and whatever weird shit my body was doing now, it didn’t seem to be my heat cycle which I was eternally grateful for.
The last thing I needed right now was that horrible shit making it impossible to work.
“How are you feeling, Lucy?”
It felt as though he’d spoken directly into my mind, and yet he sounded so far away.
“Better.” I gave in to the weird urge to press my face into his neck and sighed, feeling so sleepy I could barely remember what we were talking about. “Do you think it’ll rain tomorrow?”
“Maybe. Why do you ask?”
“I like rainy days. They’re my favorite.”
“Are they?”
“Mhm. It smells good.”
The weight of pheromones were like a warm blanket and I couldn’t help snuggling in closer.
“Lucy?”
“Hm?”
“I’m not going anywhere.”
“I know.”
“I don’t think you do.” The sound of Liam’s soft chuckle made me smile for some reason. “But that’s okay. I’m in no rush. ”
How many years had it been since I’d felt like this?
All this time I’d been surviving, and it wasn’t until an alpha I didn’t even know put his arms around me that I realized just how much pain I carried, wearing it like I wore my favorite coat – barely even noticing how heavy it was.
Until it was gone.