Chapter 4 - Mason
I'm a fucking idiot.
What the hell was I thinking, using the master key to let myself into the cottage and making breakfast like some kind of—what?
Thoughtful host? Good Samaritan? I see Lily standing in the bedroom doorway, pepper spray clutched in her hand, eyes wide with fear and confusion, and I realize exactly how badly I've fucked up.
I should've knocked. Should've called first. Should've done literally anything other than break into the place where she's sleeping with her kid and start cooking bacon like a goddamn creep.
"Fuck." The word comes out harsh. "I'm sorry. I should've… Christ, I should've knocked."
Her fingers are still around the pepper spray. She's wearing Sierra's robe, and I can see her pulse racing in her throat. The same fear I saw last night when I approached her car, except now it's justified because I actually did something threatening.
"I thought it'd be a nice gesture," I continue, knowing how stupid that sounds even as I say it. "Making breakfast. Having coffee ready. But I wasn't thinking about how it'd look from your perspective. How it'd feel to wake up and hear someone in the kitchen."
I was in the military. If I woke up to unexpected noises, I'd be grabbing my gun before my brain fully processed consciousness.
The number of times I've come awake with my fist already swinging, my body in fight mode before my mind catches up, and I'm expecting her to just be okay with a strange man in her temporary home?
Fuck. I really am an idiot.
"It's been a long time since I talked to a woman," I admit, setting down the spatula and holding up my hands.
Same gesture as last night. Non-threatening.
Harmless. "Long time since I tried to be a gentleman.
Clearly, I forgot the basics. Like not scaring the shit out of someone who's already vulnerable. "
Lily's grip on the pepper spray loosens slightly, but she doesn't put it down. Smart. She shouldn't.
"You have a key?" Her voice is tight.
"Master key. All of us do, in case of emergencies." I pull it from my pocket and set it on the counter, sliding it toward her. "But I shouldn't have used it without asking. That was wrong. I'm sorry."
She stares at the key, then at me, then back at the key. I can see her trying to decide if I'm genuinely apologizing or just saying what she wants to hear. If I'm actually safe or just better at hiding the danger.
The robe shifts as she moves, and I catch a glimpse of the curve of her breast. Full and soft and absolutely bare underneath that thin terry cloth.
No bra. Probably no panties either. Just Lily's naked body wrapped in Sierra's too-small robe, and my cock immediately takes interest despite the completely inappropriate timing.
I force my eyes back to her face, but it's too late. She caught me looking.
Her cheeks flush, and she glances down at herself, seeming to realize for the first time exactly how much of her body is visible. The robe gapes at the chest, shows the upper swell of her breasts. Clings to her wide hips and thick thighs in a way that makes my mouth water.
"I should—" She backs toward the bedroom. "Let me just… I'll get dressed."
She disappears before I can respond, and I hear her moving around in the bedroom. Quiet murmurs to her daughter. The rustle of fabric.
I turn back to the stove and flip the bacon, trying to ignore the fact that my cock is half-hard and my brain is full of images I have no business entertaining. Lily's curves. Her full breasts. The way that robe barely contained her body. What she'd look like without any barriers at all.
I need to stop it. She's a single mom who slept in her car last night. She's vulnerable and exhausted and the last thing she needs is me eye-fucking her over breakfast.
When she returns, she's wearing the same clothes from yesterday. Purple cardigan and tight jeans that hug her thick thighs. She's put herself back together as best she can, but I can still see the exhaustion in her eyes. The wariness.
"I made enough for three," I say, gesturing to the plates I've set out. "If your daughter's hungry."
"Rosie's still sleeping." Lily hovers in the doorway like she's not sure if she should come closer. "She'll be up soon, though."
"Coffee's fresh." I pour a cup and set it on the counter, stepping back to give her space. "Made it strong, but there's cream and sugar if you want it."
She edges into the kitchen, keeping the counter between us, and picks up the coffee mug. Takes a sip and closes her eyes like it's the best thing she's tasted in weeks. Maybe it is.
"Thank you." Her voice is softer now. Less afraid, more resigned. "For the coffee. And the breakfast. And for not being a serial killer."
"Day's still young." The joke falls flat, and I wince. "Sorry. Bad sense of humor."
"It's fine." She takes another sip of coffee, studying me over the rim. "So, are you going to tell me why you really brought me here? What you actually want?"
Direct. I like that about her, even if the question makes my jaw tighten.
"I told you the truth last night." I plate the bacon and eggs, sliding one toward her. "There's a kid involved. It's cold. I had an empty cottage. Simple as that."
"Nothing's ever that simple."
"Maybe not." I lean against the opposite counter, maintaining distance. "But sometimes it is. Sometimes someone just needs help, and you happen to be in a position to give it."
She doesn't look convinced, but she picks up a fork and starts eating. Small bites at first, like she's testing whether the food is safe, then larger ones as hunger takes over. I watch her eat. Probably creepy, but I can't help it, and wonder when the last time was that she had a real meal.
"What are you doing in Blackwater Falls?" I ask when she's halfway through the plate. "You mentioned looking for work last night, but this town isn't exactly a job market hotspot."
Lily sets down her fork and meets my eyes. For a moment, I think she's not going to answer. Then she sighs, her shoulders slumping.
"I'm trying to survive," she says bluntly. "I've been going from town to town for six months, taking whatever work I can find. But nobody wants to hire a single mom who has to bring her kid to work. Nobody wants the liability or the complication."
"That's fucked up."
"That's reality." She picks up her coffee again, cradling it between her hands. "But I heard about Sarah at the Blackwater Falls Saloon. Heard she's hiring and that she offers nighttime daycare. That's... that's perfect for someone like me."
Sarah. I know Sarah, everyone in Blackwater Falls knows Sarah. She's run the saloon for twenty years, and she's good people. Fair. Honest. Doesn't put up with shit from anyone.
"I know Sarah," I tell Lily. "I can take you there today. Put in a good word for you, if you want."
Lily's eyes widen slightly. "You'd do that?"
"Why not?" I shrug. "Sarah trusts my judgment. If I vouch for you, she'll at least give you a fair shot."
"But you don't know me." Lily's voice cracks slightly. "You don't know if I'm a good worker or if I'll show up on time or if I'll steal from the register. You don't know anything about me except that I was desperate enough to follow a stranger to a ranch in the middle of nowhere."
"I know you're a good mother," I say quietly. "I know you're willing to sleep in your car to keep your kid safe. I know you're not afraid to work hard because you drove all this way looking for a job. That's enough for me."
She stares at me like I've said something in a foreign language. Like kindness is so unexpected that she doesn't know how to process it.
"Why?" she finally asks. "Why are you being nice to me? Be honest with me, please. I don’t understand."
Because you're gorgeous and I haven't been able to stop thinking about you since you walked into Murphy's.
Because there's something about you that makes me want to protect you, even though I barely know you.
Because I know what it's like to be desperate and alone and I remember what it meant when Frank offered me a place to stay, no questions asked.
"Because Frank taught us to help people who need it," I say instead. "And because it's the right thing to do."
Lily's eyes get bright, like she might cry, but she blinks rapidly and turns away. "I need to check on Rosie."
She disappears into the bedroom, and I hear her talking softly to her daughter. The kid's voice, high and sweet, asking where they are. Lily's patient explanation about the nice man who's letting them stay here.
Nice man. If she only knew the thoughts I've been having about her body.
The way I imagined bending her over this kitchen counter while I was cooking bacon.
The way I want to peel that cardigan off her shoulders and find out if her breasts are as soft as they look.
I'm not a nice man. I'm a fucked-up ex-military guy with PTSD and anger issues and a terror of becoming his father.
But for some reason, Lily makes me want to be better.
She emerges a few minutes later with Rosie on her hip. The kid is adorable. Dark curls like her mother, big eyes, clutching that ratty stuffed elephant. She looks at me with curiosity rather than fear.
"This is Mason," Lily tells her daughter. "Can you say hi to Mason?"
"Hi," Rosie says shyly, then buries her face in Lily's neck.
Mother and daughter. Safe and warm in the cottage I gave them. This is what I always wanted. A family. A woman who looks at me like I matter. A kid who might call me dad someday. But I can't have that. I'm too broken. Too damaged. Too afraid I'll hurt them.
"Hi, Rosie." I keep my voice gentle. "You hungry? I made eggs."
Rosie peeks out at me, considering. Then she nods.
"Okay." Lily sets her down in one of the chairs and cuts up the eggs into small pieces, blowing on them to cool them down. The practiced motions of a mother who's done this a thousand times.
I watch them eat together, Lily breaking off pieces of bacon for Rosie, wiping her face with a napkin.
"So," Lily says after Rosie's eaten most of her eggs. "Sarah's saloon. You really think she'll hire me?"
"I think she'll give you a shot." I refill her coffee. "Especially if I tell her you're staying at the ranch. That'll give you some credibility."
"And you don't mind me staying?" She glances around the cottage. "Wade and Sierra won't be upset that you let a stranger move into their place?"
"Wade and Sierra will understand." I lean against the counter. "They're good people. Like Frank was. We all are, despite what you might think about six men living together on a ranch."
A small smile tugs at her lips. The first genuine smile I've seen from her.
"I didn't think anything." But her tone suggests otherwise.
"You absolutely did." I grin. "But that's okay. Most people do. Six guys inheriting a ranch together sounds like the setup for either a cult or a really niche porno."
She giggles, and the sound does something to my heart. Makes that tightness worse. It makes me want to hear it again.
"Which is it?" she asks, her eyes sparkling with amusement.
"Neither. Just six fucked-up guys who got lucky enough to find a man who gave a shit about us." I pick up my own coffee. "Frank saved all of us. Gave us a home when we had nothing. Now we're trying to honor that by making the ranch work."
"That's..." Lily's expression softens. "That's really beautiful."
"Don't tell my brothers I said any of that." I finish my coffee. "I have a reputation to maintain. They'll never let me live it down."
She smiles again, and I'm struck by how much younger she looks when she's not exhausted and afraid. She can't be more than mid-twenties, but she carries herself like someone much older. Someone who's seen too much, survived too much.
"So," I say, setting down my mug. "You want to meet Sarah today? See if we can get you that job?"
Lily looks at Rosie, who's happily demolishing the last of her eggs, then back at me.
"Yeah," she smiles. "I'd like that."