Chapter 24 Roman
ROMAN
Ihear the car pull up and I’m already walking to the foyer.
In the hour since Ares called, I’ve had a few drinks to settle my anger. It’s not really working. I’m still furious.
The door opens and she walks in with Ares right behind her. She’s looking down at the floor, unable to meet my gaze. It’s as guilty of a posture as I’ve ever seen in my life.
I can’t believe it’s her. She’s been the one ratting me out to the Feds. This whole time, none of it meant anything. She was just playing me to sell me out.
“Leave us,” I tell Ares. Without a word, he does as he’s told and walks back through the front door. I just glare at her, waiting for her to speak. To make some plea for her innocence. She doesn’t. She just stands there looking at the floor like a scolded child.
“Where were you?” I ask.
She takes a breath and says, “You know where I was.”
“I want to hear you tell me. Where were you, Ember?”
She takes the longest time to speak. Every second that passes, my fury rises within me. Finally, she speaks slowly like she’s defusing a bomb, “Whatever you’re thinking… I promise you, I never betrayed you.”
“‘Promise me’? Promise? Do you even fucking know what that word means?”
“Roman—”
“You were meeting with a Fed, Ember!” I shout. “A fucking federal agent! All this time, I thought that you were coming around to me. That we were falling—” I stop myself. No. I’m not uttering that word. Not here. Not to her. “I thought what we had was real.”
“It is.”
“It’s not! Not when you turn your back on everything I am and go running to rat me out to Rastelli. Just tell me one thing. How the hell did you even know about the meeting with Abate? I never discussed it with you. How did you hear about it?”
She looks up at me with fearful, watery blue eyes.
“ANSWER ME!”
She jumps and flinches away from me. Fat tears roll down her face. “I didn’t tell her about that. I didn’t tell her anything.”
“That’s not what I asked—”
“I know what you mean,” she says, her voice raising in volume. “I never told Rastelli about the meeting or anything about you or the Bratva. I didn’t rat.”
“You’re a fucking liar,” I say.
“I am not lying to you, Roman. I swear—”
“Ares saw you meeting with her in a diner,” I growl at her. “You’re not even denying that you’ve been talking to her. You really want me to believe that you’re not a krysa?”
“She wanted me to rat, okay?” Tears start streaming down her face.
“And a couple of months ago… A couple of months ago, I thought that I might. That it was the right thing to do. I didn’t want to be the manager of a fucking Bratva bar, Roman!
I’ve never dreamed of being a part of this shit! You pulled me into it!”
“You didn’t exactly resist me very hard, Ember. Don’t act like I just waved my magic golden dick and you had no choice but to follow. You came to me willingly.”
“I know!” she shouts, her voice a heartbreaking cry. “It didn’t start out that way, though. I… I never thought…” She stops and wipes one wet cheek with the back of her hand. “When things started getting serious between us, I told her I was done. I wasn’t going to be her fucking snitch anymore.”
“Is that right?”
“Yes!” She barks it at me, her eyes wide and ravenous.
The fire behind them is enticing and damned sexy.
No wonder I started falling for her. “I told her I wanted out and in return, she raided the club. And today, all I could think about was how doing that caused all this and I felt guilty, all right? I only went to meet her to tell her to back the fuck off.”
She’s so passionate in her words that I almost believe her. I take a step back from her and say, “Get your shit and get the fuck out of my house.”
She freezes, flabbergasted. Before she can say any more, I add, “I don’t want to hear your excuses or your lies. You’re lucky I’m telling you to leave instead of having you executed. Get out. Now.”
I turn and walk away. Back to my study and my drink. If I never see her again, it’ll be too soon.
I’m not in the study more than a few moments when I hear the door open behind me. I turn to see her standing there. “You deaf?” I ask her. “I told you—”
“I heard you,” she says, walking up to me. “I’m not going that easily, Roman. You’re going to listen to me.”
“I don’t have to listen to you. Do you understand?”
“You could have me killed, yes. I get that. In fact, that’s the one thing I’ve always understood about this relationship. You’re a monster. You’re the big, bad wolf. Got it.”
She walks right up to me, getting in my face. “All this talk about my being a rat and you forgot one very important thing. I would never betray a man that I love. Never.”
I blink in confusion. Love? I move away from her to my drink caddy. “You don’t love me.”
“Why else would I even be here right now? With you growling threats at me, I’m certainly not here for my health.”
I ignore her, picking up a fresh glass for my liquor. She walks up to me, her eyes darting frantically from my face to my hands as I make another drink.
“How many have you had already?”
“That is none of your business. Not anymore.”
“Are you drunk?”
I slam the glass down on the caddy and it rattles in a dozen clinking tones like a swinging chandelier. “What’s it to you?” I ask her. She pauses, but the determination is still hard in her eyes.
“Listen to me, Roman. I’m not the rat in your midst. Someone told Rastelli about the meeting with Abate, but it wasn’t me.”
“You are really pushing me, Ember.”
“Good! Maybe if I push hard enough, you’ll start to hear me. I am not your enemy. I would never hurt you like that. I meant what I said, Roman. I am in love with you. I would never—”
“Don’t say that again,” I snarl at her. “You don’t have any idea what it means to love a man like me. You don’t have what it takes to stand by me when everything in the outside world tells you otherwise. You don’t have the stomach for it.”
That hurt her and, in turn, hurts me. I know I’ve just crossed a line. Her bottom lip trembles, then stiffens as she regains her composure. “You’re so full of shit, Roman.”
I roll my eyes at her. “Whatever.”
“And you’re deflecting. You wouldn’t waste your breath on me if you thought any of that was true. I’d be dead already if you really believed that.” She pauses, looking at my face, the corners of her mouth twitching. “In fact, I think you might actually love me back.”
“I think you’re delusional.”
“Fine. Say it to my face, then. Tell me you don’t love me. That all this was just a fling and you’re trying to save my life out of the ‘kindness’ of your heart. Do that, and I’ll leave. I’ll walk out without another fucking word.”
I scoff at her. “You’re trying to goad me.”
“I’m trying to get through to you. Tell me you don’t love me.”
The way she’s looking at me, daring me… I take a drink from my glass and set it down. “Get out.”
“No.”
“Ember.”
“I just gave you the easiest way to make me leave and you can’t do it, can you?”
I look her in her eyes and the ice in them melts something inside me. I cannot stand that I’m hurting her. I can’t stand that I have to push her away. I can’t take it that love or whatever this is just isn’t enough in the end.
“I’m not going to tell you again.” I set my drink down and approach her. She crosses her arms defiantly.
“Make me leave, Roman.”
Standing this close to her, feeling the aura of her strength mixed in with that sweet smell of her skin, it’s mixing things up inside me.
I’m still angry with her. I’m furious, actually. I’m also really turned on right now. Sexy doesn’t begin to describe her right now. I want her submission as much as I want her dominance. I’m hungry for every part of her body right now.
She sees it. She tilts her head slightly at me and in a low, sensual tone she says, “I said, make me.”
I grab her by the arm and turn her around, pulling her close to me while I pin her arms behind her back.
She gasps in surprise as I lean into her hair, indulging in her sweet scent.
In her ear, I growl, “Always the fucking brat. What’s it going to take for you to understand that no one demands anything of me? ”
Breathlessly, she responds. “Just tell me you don’t love me.”
“I shouldn’t have to tell you anything.” I bite her earlobe. Her breath catches as she bites her lip. “You should know better by now, milaya.”
I switch to holding her wrists with one hand while I move the other around her waist and undo the zipper of her jeans.
“You are such a little bratty thing,” I whisper as I slide my hand down her panties.
My fingers run through the soft down of her pubic hair and down between her legs.
My fingers find the lips of her soaking wet pussy and I stroke her slowly.
“Of course you’re soaking wet,” I whisper into her ear. “You get off on being a brat, don’t you?”
She doesn’t respond, so I tighten my grip on her wrist. She whimpers, “Yes.”
I stop stroking her pussy and say, “You’re not new to this. Yes… what?”
“Yes, Sir,” she whispers. She moves her hips so that my hand slips out of her panties a little. I pull her wrist upward. She moans out in pain. I push my hand back down into her panties, rolling her clit under my fingertips.
Ember’s breath quickens and she’s trying not to moan. Trying her best not to enjoy this.
“Don’t act ashamed now.” I nuzzle my face into the crook her neck, kissing her skin. “Let me hear you. You want me to fuck this pussy?”
“Yes, Sir,” she repeats, her voice breathy and desperate.
“That’s my little girl.” I slide my fingers inside her and bite her neck. Her walls tighten around my fingers as a moan lifts from her mouth. “You would love it if I fucked you right here, huh? Ripped these jeans off you, fucked that perfect little pussy. Answer me, Ember.”
“I would love it, Daddy.”
I smile against her neck. My dick presses through my pants against her ass, rock hard and practically bursting through.
I rub myself against her ass while I finger her.
She leans into me, biting her lip in an effort to suppress her moans.
I slide my fingers up to her clit and roll the pad of my fingers around and around it.
“That feel good to you?”
“It feels so fucking good, Sir.”
“I should make you come like this. Have you creaming all over my hand and then throw you out on your ass.”
A ripple of a chuckle from her. “You still haven’t said it. I’m not leaving until you do.”
Wow. I pause and look at her profile. She’s side-eyeing me. Still daring me.
“I’ll fuck you until you’re crying out my name. I will make you come over and over again, and when you think you can’t take any more, I’ll make you come harder than you ever have in your life. And when you’re all used up, I will throw you out of this house without a thought. You understand that?”
“All that when you can just admit that you love me? I don’t think— Fuck!”
I press on her clit hard and her knees almost buckle. “You are forgetting yourself yet again. Let me remind you.”
I release her, just long enough to pull down her jeans, then I press her against the wall and unzip my pants. Once my cock is free, I grab her by the hips. “Spread your legs for me, baby.”
She does, and I start rubbing my dick between her thighs, pressing the head between her lips and slipping up and down through her pussy juices.
“Beg for it,” I growl. “I want to hear you begging me for this cock.”
It takes her a moment. She leans into my hands as she gets more and more wet. Finally, she moans, “Fuck me. Please give it to me.”
“Want me to fuck you hard?”
“God, yes. Please, Daddy. I’ll be your good girl from now on.”
“Promise?”
“Yes.”
I slide myself inside her, thrusting hard. The wash of sensation comes over me, her tight pussy grabbing hold of my cock and wrench a moan out of me. “You’re so… fucking… tight…”
The way I’m fucking her, the sound my thighs make as they slap the back of hers, her gasping moans as her nails dig into the wood of my study walls. Nothing on earth could be better than her right now. I have to slow down to keep from coming too fast.
My hands move up her and under her shirt, grabbing both her tits and squeezing them. Her rhythmic moans start to shake as I move slower, more methodical.
She straightens, wrapping an arm around my neck and squeezing her pussy around me. Her mouth finds mine and she kisses me, her hungry mouth pulling me in.
“I love you, Roman,” she moans. “God, I fucking love you.”
Her words, the way she feels, I’m lost. I am so lost in her. “Ember…”
“Say it, Daddy,” she moans. “Tell your little girl you love her.”
“I do love you.” It comes out effortlessly. I do love her. I think I have for a long time. I grab her hips again and push her forward, fucking her hard. I need to end this. I… have to end this…
She comes before me. Her body shivers under my grip as she calls out my name. I come hard, filling her up with every thrust.
I pull away from her, my own body still vibrating. She wastes no time and turns around, getting on her knees in front of me. I watch as she licks me clean, her tongue moving over my tongue to lap away the mix of our sex. When she takes me in her mouth, I get start getting hard again.
Those eyes looking up at me. That beautiful fucking face…
“Stop,” I say.
She keeps going, taking me deeper. I grab her head and pull myself out of her mouth. “I said stop.”
I step away from her and curiously, my eyes start to burn. I have to turn my back to her as I zip myself up. “Get your clothes on, get your things, and leave.”
She doesn’t say anything at first. Maybe she thought the sex would change things… or my admission… I don’t know. Finally, I hear her say my name. “Roman…”
“It’s not enough.” My voice cracks a little. Fuck. This is not how this happens. This woman will not break me. “You have to go, Ember.”
Nothing. No sound, no words. Just the feeling of her eyes on my back.
“Please.” The word comes out soft, but firm.
I hear her move at that. She doesn’t say anything as she gets her clothes back on. Nor does she speak when she walks out the door.
Once she’s gone, I go back to my abandoned drink and I tell myself that it’s better this way. It has to happen like this.