Chapter Sixteen #2
“I saw you the day before yesterday with Joel.”
She looked even more confused. “Yes, I had lunch with him and his wife, Rebecca.”
“I didn’t see her. I just saw you run into his arms and...”
“And?” she asked.
He stood abruptly, walked to the window, stared out, and shoved his hands deep into the pockets of his dress pants.
“He was perfect. He was whole, and I felt you deserved a whole man.”
He waited for a long moment.
“I don’t know what I dislike the most. You're not trusting me or thinking you know what I need better than I do.”
“I don’t know what’s been going through my head for the last few weeks. It started when you came to my building, and every man turned to watch you. You are so incredibly beautiful. I can’t understand why you’re with me sometimes.”
“You know something, I never really saw the scars, and not once did I think they took away from how handsome you were. You beat every man because not one of them compared to you in my head.”
He came back and sat on the side of the bed, and before he could talk, the door opened, and the doctor and nurse came in.
“Oh, good. How are you feeling?” the doctor asked as she read the monitors.
“Should she be awake after the sedative?” Kaleb asked.
Jessica turned to them. “Yes. It was a very mild one. It would have just taken the edge off and not really put her to sleep. The trauma and shock did that.”
Jessica looked into Myla’s eyes. “Do you have a headache?”
“A very mild one.”
“Good. I’m glad it’s not worse. You have a mild concussion—nothing to worry about. You might have a slight headache for a few days, but a Tylenol will take care of that. Your blood pressure is good. Now tell me if anything else hurts?”
Myla raised her hands.
“My palms hurt a bit.”
“You scraped them up, but I washed them and made sure there was no debris in the wounds.”
“I mostly just ache.”
Myla tried to concentrate on what the doctor was saying as she watched the nurse take out the IV and then move everything out of the way from the bed.
“That’s understandable. You’re going to be sore for a few days. Just take it easy and rest. May I have the psychologist come down and talk with you?”
Myla shook her head. “It’s not necessary. I have a friend who deals with this kind of thing. This has happened before, so she knows my whole story.”
“Good enough. I have nothing to keep you here. You have someone to take care of you so I can discharge you and you can go home to your bed.”
She gripped the blanket that lay across her waist. “I would feel better at home. Thank you for everything. I know it wasn’t easy to care for me right after.”
The doctor lay her hand on Myla’s forearm. “You were just fine. Give yourself a break. You’ve been through a horrible experience. The fact I don’t need to have you fully sedated tells me how strong you are.”
She tried to smile. “I hope so.”
“I’ll have the nurse bring in some scrubs for you to go home in.”
“Thank you again, Doctor,” Myla said.
The room got quiet once again. The nurse had turned off the monitors, so there wasn’t even a beeping sound to break the silence.
Myla looked at Kaleb as he stood with his hands in his pockets and stared at her. “You wouldn’t happen to know where my purse is, would you?”
He nodded and got into the closet. “They only found one of your shoes and this.”
“My clothes?”
“The police have them for evidence.”
She nodded and then rummaged through her purse.
“What are you looking for, Baby?”
“My phone, I want to call Kelly to come get me.”
Kaleb’s eyebrows snapped together. “Wait, why would you do that?”
She stopped to look up at him. “Because I’ve imposed on you enough.”
He ran a frustrated hand through his hair. “Listen, I know we have a lot to talk about...”
She shook her head. “Not really. I can’t see anything changing between us. You’re not going to trust that it’s you I want to be with, and I won’t be able to trust you won’t run scared again.”
He sat next to her hip and laid a hand over her purse so she’d stop looking. “I screwed up. I know that, and I have a lot to make up for.”
“Tell me this. If I hadn’t been...” She paused and swallowed. “Going through this, would you have come back?”
She nodded sadly when he stayed quiet. That was her answer. “I’ve got enough to deal with at the moment. I don’t want to have to worry about you, too. I just can’t.”
He grasped her hand. “You didn’t let me answer.”
“You were quiet so long I thought that was your answer.”
“No, I’m just trying to find the words I need.
I was dying inside just thinking about you leaving, and then when I broke it off to protect myself, it felt like my heart was ripped in two.
You are the little I’ve been looking for my whole life.
I was going to come to you and ask for forgiveness, but this happened. ”
She studied his expression and saw hope and remorse, but mainly she saw he was telling the truth. She still didn’t know if she had it in her. The pain, when she lost him, was so overwhelming it had taken over her life. “I just don’t know.”
He gently set his hand on her arm. “Give me another chance. Please, Baby. I know I was a dumbass, but I learned my lesson.”
Myla studied his expression. She sighed. If they planned to have a relationship, they both had to learn forgiveness for better or worse.
She nodded. “I’ll let you back in my life, but if you ever leave again, that’s it. I can’t do this again. It felt like my heart was torn out of my chest.”
He slowly wrapped his arms around her and pulled her against his chest. He set his chin gently on the top of her head and closed his eyes.
“I won’t let you down again.” He leaned back and tipped her face up with a finger under her chin. He bent and pressed his lips against hers tenderly. He didn’t want to overwhelm her, scare her, or hurt her lip. He relaxed when he felt her hand grasp his shirt to hold him to her.
She leaned back when he lifted his head. “Take me home,” she said, and let her fingers caress his scarred cheek.
“You got it. But I’m taking you to my home, and I’m hoping you stay.”
“What do you mean, stay?”
“I mean, live. I want to be able to hold you every night and keep you safe. I can’t do that if you’re across town.”
She drew in a shaky breath. She went from losing him to moving in with him within a few days. She needed to take some time to make a decision, but she had to deal with the trauma of the attack first. She didn’t want to make the wrong decision.
“I’ll stay with you for now, but I don’t know if I’ll keep living with you. I want to take this slow, so we don’t mess it up again.”
He nodded and pushed her hair away from her face.
“I understand. Let’s worry about it later. I just want to get you home and into bed where you can rest.”
The nurse came in and dropped off the scrubs and discharge papers.
Within thirty minutes, they were walking out to Kaleb’s car with his arm around her waist. He got her settled in the passenger seat and then started for his house. At a stoplight, he looked at her and reached for her hand. “Please tell me if there is anything I do that scares you.”
She nodded.
“Promise me, Baby.”
She turned her head as it rested against the headrest to look at him. “I promise.”
He nodded, turned his attention back to the road.
His thoughts skittered around his head as he concentrated on driving. He knew they had a long way to go, but he’d do whatever it took to get them back on track. He’d heard that littles were more sensitive than normal women, so it might take more to get her to trust him again.
Kaleb planned on getting in touch with a few of his friends who have littles and get advice on how to proceed so he didn’t mess up again.
He’d found his little, now he was determined to keep her. There was no other option.