Chapter 1 – Sydney #2
“I’m coming.” It takes me an embarrassingly long time to shuffle to the door and unlatch the deadbolt.
Jade’s eyes widen at the sight of me when I ease the door open.
“Oh,” she says, taking a step back and blinking hard at my appearance. Her eyes roll over my body, from my split lip to the blanket wrapped around me, and then down to my bare feet. “Oh, Syd, you did some damage to yourself, didn’t you?”
I wince, reaching up to touch my frizzy curls. They feel flat on one side, unmanageably wide on the other. “Is it that bad?”
“Well, it’s not exactly good.” She brushes past me into the apartment, scooting around the couch and dropping her hangover haul on the coffee table. I shuffle along behind her, dragging my blanket behind me like a cape.
It’s even brighter in my living room than it was in the bathroom.
There was a time when I loved how much natural light this apartment gets, loved that it was sunny and bright all day.
But today the sunlight feels like it might kill me.
I collapse onto the couch with a groan and curl into a ball, praying for some clouds to block out the sun.
“How did you know I needed help?” I ask.
“You can thank your quiet doctor for that,” Jade answers, pulling a bagel sandwich out of the bag.
The smell of food nearly sends me running back to the bathroom, my stomach rioting at the idea of eating, but I know from far too many hangovers that it’s the only thing that’ll cure me right now.
“Care to explain why a shockingly disheveled Sebastian was waiting outside the café when I tried to open up this morning, begging me to check up on you?”
I make a small pathetic noise and pull the blanket over my head, hiding my face. I don’t want to explain. I don’t want to think about him, or any of them, right now.
“Come on, Sydney, you smell like a winery, and you look like death.” Jade nudges my cocooned legs with the food until I finally emerge and take it from her. “What the hell happened?”
I force myself to sit up and take a tentative bite of the bagel. I let it sit in my stomach for a few seconds before I trust myself to speak. “Well, I’m officially single again.”
Jade’s face falls. “Oh, shit.” She drops heavily onto the couch next to me. “Why? Everything seemed so great with them!”
“Oh, so Seb didn’t tell you that too? Now that the two of you are such good friends and all?” It’s hard to sound angry when I’m actively trying to keep from vomiting. The words come out bratty and childish, my sarcasm flat.
“Oh, please.” Jade clicks her tongue. “Don’t do that. Green is a terrible color on you. You know you’re my best and only friend, Syd. I wouldn’t be bringing my patented hangover cure to anyone else.”
I grumble an apology into my food.
“Forgiven.” Jade crosses her arms over her chest, leaning back against the couch cushions. “So. Are you going to tell me what happened, or do I need to schedule a playdate with Seb so he can tell me while we braid each other’s hair?”
I let out a laugh and regret it immediately when my stomach somersaults in protest. But the bagel is doing an excellent job of soaking up whatever alcohol remains in my body, and I’m starting to feel almost human again. I take another bite.
“I had a… moment with Seb yesterday,” I admit. Jade inhales sharply. “It kind of freaked me out, and I ended up at Alec’s apartment.”
“Wait, what kind of moment are we talking about here? Your usual bickering or a sexy moment?” Jade asks, wriggling her eyebrows.
She’s been hinting that there’s something between him and me for a while, and I was so insistent she was wrong.
Great. Now I’m going to have to deal with her gloating about it.
“What do you think?” I ask with a side-eye glance.
“HA! I told you. I knew there was something there! You little vixen!” Jade squeals gleefully.
“We’re all very impressed with your gift of foresight, but at the moment I am, in fact, still single, so maybe calm down the excitement,” I remind her.
“You’re right, you’re right, sorry. Tell me what happened after.”
“Funny story,” I say with a caustic laugh. “But it turns out Alec has a wife!”
The moment the words are out of my mouth, a tight lump forms in my throat. The corners of my eyes prickle, and I swallow hard, fighting against the swell of tears.
Jade doesn’t say anything. There’s a heavy, awful silence from her. It goes on so long that I glance over at her, seeing the shock on her face, her jaw gaping. And then…
“You have got to be FUCKING KIDDING ME!” Jade’s scream echoes through my living room. And through my skull.
I wince, dropping my bagel to cover my ears. “Inside voices, Jade! Please!”
Jade grabs a pillow off the couch and buries her face in it to scream. And even though the sound is muffled by the stuffing, it still reverberates painfully around in my skull, making me groan.
“Have mercy on my hangover, please,” I beg with a whimper. “Are you trying to kill me?”
“I’ll tell you who I’m about to kill…” Jade snarls, twisting the pillow violently in her hands.
“Yeah, I’d be happy to help you with that,” I say with a dry laugh. Even though I’m only kidding, deep down, I know we wouldn’t hesitate to kill for one another. And if I’m honest, a little spark lights up inside me at the idea of inflicting a bit of vengeful pain.
“It gets worse. I didn’t find out until after the mind-blowing sex,” I tell her. “Just to really twist the knife. I opened a drawer, and boom! There it was: his wedding ring and a picture of his wife. And let me tell you, she’s stunning. Like, movie star stunning. Disgustingly pretty.”
Jade shakes her head. “Syd, I’m so sorry… I don’t even know what to say. I’m furious. I knew they were into some shady business shit, but I did not expect this.”
Neither did I. I take a big breath.
“I mean, that’s a part of it, too, isn’t it?
I went into this so blindly, trusting they were telling me the truth about themselves.
Even when you warned me about them! I feel like such an idiot.
” I cover my face with my hands, sighing.
“Was I just a joke to them? Just some side action they were toying with? I want to believe some of it was real, but how can I trust any of it now?”
“Hey, look at me.” I don’t. I drop my hands and glance at her out of the corner of my eye, picking up my bagel and curling my body over it. “You’re not an idiot. People breaking your trust is on them, not on you.”
“What’s that saying? Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me?” I laugh, but there’s no humor in it. Only an anger so acidic it burns.
I bring the bagel to my lips again but can’t bring myself to take another bite. Jade leans over the table and opens the bottle of ginger ale, pressing it into my hand.
“Drink,” she orders.
I do. It’s cold and crisp, and sweet enough the sugar coats my tongue.
Jade lets out a long breath and rubs a hand over her face.
“Look, I’m not going to lie. You’ve had a shit run of men lately.
But it doesn’t change the fact that you’re wonderful, Syd.
And I wouldn’t change a single thing about you.
” Her eyes are so sincere when she says it, there’s no doubt in my mind she means it.
“Thanks.” I give her a small smile. “I don’t deserve you, you know?”
“No one does,” Jade says sagely. “I’m perfect.”
“You really are. I love you.”
“To the moon and back,” Jade answers. Then she shoots me a considering look. “I think at least one of them cares about you, though. I don’t think your usually stoic doc is the type to show up outside of our shop like that if he doesn’t care just a little. Maybe it’s not all bad.”
“Please tell me he isn’t still downstairs,” I say, my stomach sinking. I don’t think I can face him right now. Not after everything that happened.
“No, he left. He just told me I should check on you, something about you maybe getting a bit too drunk last night?” Jade eyes the half-empty bottle of wine, uncorked on my coffee table, and then stares pointedly at the empty bottles next to it.
“Ash must have told him. He called me last night,” I admit. I set down my half-eaten bagel, frustration welling up inside of me. Of course. I should have expected they’d share everything with each other.
“What did he have to say for himself?” Jade asks.
“I wasn’t exactly in a listening mood,” I say, pressing the palms of my hands to my eyes and rubbing furiously. “I can’t trust a goddamn thing he says. Anything any of them say.”
Because it wasn’t just Alec. They were all lying to me. Letting me make a fool of myself by falling for them without letting me glimpse even a fraction of their real lives.
We’re dangerous men, Sydney, the memory of Sebastian’s voice mocks me.
Jade glances up at the clock and groans.
“I have to head downstairs and open the shop.” She frowns at me, taking in my disheveled and, I’m sure, pathetic appearance.
“Why don’t you take the day off? I don’t think it’ll be too crazy today, and I doubt you’ll be much help today, anyway. Not in the state you’re in.”
She’s right. And even though my guilt immediately kicks in, I know better than to argue. “Thanks. I’m sorry I’m such a mess.”
“You’re my mess. And you’ll be okay. You’re going to get through this,” Jade promises. “Make sure you eat every last bite of that bagel, okay?”
She gives me a long hug before she leaves.
After the door closes behind her, I fetch my cell phone and turn it back on, the screen immediately filling with missed calls and messages from Ash.
And one message from Alec.
I don’t bother reading it. I furiously swipe the message away, refusing to give him the satisfaction of lying to me again.
Tell it to your wife.