Chapter 13 #2
“Every debt you two have owed one another has been paid in blood tenfold,” Matysh says, looking between them both with a stern look in his eyes.
“We won't talk about this anymore at this table.
My vse dostatochno poteryali (We've all lost enough).
My vse dostatochno pozhertvovali (We've all sacrificed enough). Eat dinner and be merry.”
The words seem to fall flat.
Matysh's eyes hit me again, and I feel a pang of sorrow in my chest. I'm his sacrifice. It isn't news to me, but hearing it from his lips like that creates a dull ache I can't ignore.
Dimitri grits his teeth and turns his eyes away from my father. Dinner resumes moments later and we all sit in uncomfortable silence as the next course is brought out. This one is a whole baked sturgeon with fresh lemon. It smells delicious and Matysh stands up to slice each of us a portion.
How nice.
The only noise comes from our thanks to Matysh for serving us. It's strange, uncomfortable. Everybody just eats the food and, after a few minutes of not talking, I kick Matysh under the table. He glares at me.
I raise my eyebrows to silently ask him if it's time for our announcement, and he clears his throat, commanding attention from everyone sitting around us.
“We wanted all of you here today because we have something to say,” Matysh begins. He gestures to me.
“I'm pregnant,” I say, flashing all of them a soft smile. I couldn’t have said it fast enough.
I just needed the silence to end.
The first acknowledgment I see is from Polina because she smiles and jumps to her feet, walking around the table to wrap me in her arms. “I’m so happy for you two. That is wonderful news.”
“That’s great,” my father says, smiling and then looking at Matysh. I can’t interpret the expression or the silent conversation going on between them…
But there’s something.
And as for Dimitri? He doesn't react at all. His face is a hard, uncracked shell.
While everyone else is practically shaking with excitement, Dimitri stands up and looks at Matysh. “Can I speak with you in your office?”
Silence falls over the room once again as Matysh leaves with his father. A pit forms in my stomach, wondering what they're talking about. And if it involves me.
“A baby,” my father says as if in wonder as he leans back in his chair, taking a long swig of his drink. “So it begins, our families being tied together by blood. How wonderful.”
I listen to Polina making small talk with my dad about them both being grandparents. I look between my food and the door, waiting for Matysh and Dimitri to come back at any moment.
Maybe he doesn’t want us to have the baby.
And when they don't come back after about five minutes, I excuse myself to go to the bathroom. I need to know what’s going on.
Despite what Matysh thinks, anything that has to do with the family does involve me.
Standing in the hallway outside of Matysh's office, I see a shadow moving under the door as someone paces back and forth. In Dimitri’s condition, I don’t imagine it's him. That means Matysh must be frustrated enough about something that he's pacing back and forth.
I quietly inch closer to try to hear what they're saying. Both of them are speaking in purposefully hushed voices, so it's hard to decipher. I have to press my ear to the door to make out any words.
“…do this to your brother!” Dimitri says on the other end. Even only catching the tail end of the sentence I know what this is about.
“How dare you bring him up right now!” Matysh replies, his voice seething with anger. “You know why I had to do this. I didn't do this because I wanted to betray my own blood. Ya sdelal eto dlya sem'i (I did this for the family).”
“What you've done is doom us,” Dimitri snaps back. I hear a hand slapping against the desk but I don't know whose it is. “You cannot trust that man. You should have come to me before going through with this. I let them marry for love. You might be the Pahkan but you've undermined years of my—”
“You're not in control anymore,” Matysh interrupts, his voice sharp. “You can barely stand on your own. Mama has to help you piss, and I was supposed to come to you?”
A stunned silence follows. I can almost hear Dimitri’s slow, angered breathing through the door.
“You forget who built this empire,” Dimitri whispers, barely audible to me.
“I haven’t forgotten, otets (Father). But you built it with blood. I’ll rule it with power. There’s a difference.” Matysh's response is cold, calculated. And it sends a shiver down my spine.
All this time, I've known I was just a bargaining chip for him. But hearing how he views this relationship as nothing more than another rung on a ladder…hurts. Even if it shouldn’t.
“Power?” Dimitri spits the word like poison on his tongue. “You think fucking that snake’s daughter makes you powerful? Boris is just waiting for you to make a mistake so he can snap out of the grass and swallow you whole.”
“Then let him wait,” Matysh says. “Because the next man who underestimates me won’t live to regret it.”
I clamp my hand over my mouth, trying not to make too much noise. But holy fucking shit. He is a monster.
“You’d threaten your own father?” Dimitri finally says, voice trembling with disbelief.
“I don’t threaten family,” Matysh quietly replies, his voice calm. “But I warn them. Don’t question my decisions again.”
Footsteps approach the door before I can move out of the way, and when it swings open, there’s Matysh. He pulls the door open and freezes when he sees me standing in front of him, tears pooling in my eyes ready to spill down my cheeks.
“You shouldn't be here,” he grits out, his voice low as he grabs my arm and drags me away from his office.
I let him drag me all the way to the bedroom, but as soon as the door shuts, I turn around and push my hands against his chest as hard as I can.
“Get away from me,” I spit at Matysh. I see a flicker of something in his eyes, but I don’t know what it is.
“Catarina, calm down,” Matysh says, reaching his arms out to grab me as I try to turn around to storm away. “How much did you hear?”
“Enough.” I shake my head at him in disgust. “Enough to know exactly what I am to you. But good god, to hear it like that… I really am nothing. I’m not even a fucking person!”
“Catarina, that’s not true,” Matysh counters, taking a cautious step toward me like I'm a scared cat in a corner.
“No. I'm just leverage. A pretty little truce offering.”
“You're my wife.”
“You say that like it should mean something,” I scoff. “You talked about my father like he was disposable, like the deal means nothing. How am I supposed to trust you? What happens to me when I'm not convenient anymore?” My voice cracks.
Matysh takes another step forward and I back up, pressing my spine against the wall with nowhere else to go.
“You have no idea what you are to me,” Matysh whispers, moving even closer as I clench my jaw and glare at him.
“Then tell me,” I demand. “Because last I checked I’m just your fucking baby factory.”
He pauses, eyes locked on mine. “You are mine. That is what you are.”
“Right,” I snap back at him, shaking my head. “Just nothing more than a fucking prized possession. That’s all my worth to you.”
“You have worth to me.” The words are few, but coming from him, they mean something.
“Fine,” I whisper.
“You shouldn’t doubt me,” Matysh growls. “I’ll make you regret that.”
I hold my breath, my heart racing. “Is that a threat?” I breathe out.
“Obeshchaniye (A promise).”