17. Lily
Lily
17
“The cut looks great,” I tell Evie, gently running my fingers over the healing gash on her forehead. “Keep it covered for the next few days to be safe.”
“You’re positive it won’t scar?” Evie asks with hesitation in her voice.
“I’m sure. How’s your wrist?”
She holds up her brace-covered wrist. “Sore but I haven’t had to take painkillers today.”
“That’s good.”
“Speaking of, how are you feeling?” Rose asks as she multitasks, feeding Liam with one hand and cutting Christmas shapes out of cookie dough with the other.
My eyes shift to where Mei is busy combining ingredients for more dough with Alice at the counter. Raphael’s words about making good memories to replace the bad echo in my mind. A smile spreads across my face as I watch her create new and happy memories.
I turn back to Rose and Evie. “I’m fine. It was barely a fever.”
“That’s not what your nurse said.” Rose winks.
Evie grabs a bottle of orange liquid and pours a glass for herself. “And what a handsome nurse you had, too.” She pours another glass and pushes it toward me.
Picking up the glass, I sniff the drink and recognize the sweet and crisp scents of orange and champagne. I can’t even remember the last time I had alcohol, let alone a mimosa. Whenever Xiao forced me to drink, it was always straight tequila or vodka. Anything that rendered my senses useless and left me defenseless for him and his men to take advantage.
I start with a gentle sip, and when the flavor explodes on my tongue, I take another larger sip. Then I force myself to set it down because if I’m not careful, the alcohol will go straight to my head.
“Careful, Evie,” Rose warns her best friend with a laugh. “You don’t want Enzo hearing you say such things.”
Evie leans back in her chair and smiles coyly. “Maybe I do. Jealous sex is almost as good as angry sex.”
“Who’s having sex now?” A beautiful woman with tan skin, hazel eyes, and thick dark hair piled high in a messy bun asks as she enters the open kitchen. She’s the type of gorgeous that even dressed in scrubs with little to no makeup on, she just draws your eye immediately.
“Gabriella,” Alice greets the woman. So this is the elusive little sister. “Are you all done for the holidays, my dear?”
“Yes, I’m all yours, Mom.”
“Excellent. Have you met Lily and her daughter, Mei?”
Gabriella turns to me with a bright smile. “No, but I’ve been really looking forward to meeting you. I hope you’re feeling better.”
“I am. Thank you for your help. Raphael told me you’re about to graduate as a nurse practitioner?”
“That’s right.”
“Do you know what specialty you want to go into?”
“I was thinking pediatrics.” Her eyes drift between the kids, her features softening as she watches them. “I want to help give them a voice. Protect them. You know?”
“That’s honorable.” I admire.
Evie offers a glass of mimosa to Gabriella, who shakes her head. The Brit narrows her eyes and says, “What are you, pregnant?”
“Who’s pregnant?” Alice asks abruptly, the one word snagged her attention in an instant.
“No one, Mom,” Gabriella calls over her shoulder. She turns back to Evie and says, “I’m just exhausted and don’t need any alcohol helping that along.”
Evie shrugs and then tops her glass off with the amount she poured for Gabriella.
“Hi! I’m Mei, and you’re really pretty,” my daughter announces as she literally pops up next to the table.
Gabriella smiles at Mei, leaning down to get eye level with her. “Well, hello there, Mei. I’m Gabriella, Raphael and Michael’s little sister, and thank you for the compliment. You are very gorgeous yourself.”
“Thanks! Bye!” she chirps and runs off back to the counter where Alice waits. From the looks of it, my daughter has been taking advantage of the free cookies and is now on a sugar high. Which means she’s going to crash and crash hard soon. Hopefully, by then, I’ll know where we’re staying too.
“Oh, my gosh…I love her,” Gabriella gushes, watching her bounce away. “You’d never know, looking at her…”
“That she’s Xiao’s daughter?” I finish her thought.
Gabriella looks at me, horrified. “Oh no. I didn’t mean it like that.”
I know she didn’t, but that doesn’t make it any less true. “It’s okay. He’s just her sperm donor.”
Rose snorts, still finding the line funny even though she’s heard it before.
“Well, look, he only makes up half of who she is. And she has a fierce mama bear protecting the other half of her.”
“Thanks, Gabriella.”
“A bangin’-hot mama,” Evie compliments with a heavy English accent. I have an idea. The boys will be gone all day, and I’ve been dying for a spa day. I’m talking about hair, nails, facials…the whole nine yards. We need it, ladies.”
Rose sighs, picking Liam up to burp the baby over her shoulder. “I guess it would be nice.”
Gabriella shrugs and looks around with a half smile. “I’m not against it. I’ve had a hard few days at the hospital.”
The offer is tempting, but I can’t shake my hesitation to get close to any of them while Xiao remains a threat. His presence is like a dark cloud hanging over my excitement. And I want to get close to them. I really do. But if I do... if I open that door and let them in, the thought of losing them and being dragged back into that unbearable hell feels like a death sentence. Not just for me but for Mei, too.
“What do you say, Lily?” Rose asks, wiggling her eyebrows at me.
I gaze around the room, catching on each of their expectant faces. Even Alice meets my eyes with an encouraging smile. Raphael’s words echo through my mind, reminding me I’m safe here. Reminding me to fight for the girl buried beneath the lingering pain and layers of scars. And the only way I can do that is to stop living in the past and focus on the future. One day, one step, one new memory at a time.
“Well, I have had a rough six years,” I say, enjoying how each of their faces falls in surprise before I crack a smile and laugh. “Do you think there’s a facial that can erase that amount of time?”
“…and so the girl opened the window and stared out at the grand forest like she’s done so many times before. Only now was she about to see it from below. She gathered her long lock of golden hair and threw it out the window and over a hook before watching it fall to the green ground below. She climbed up on the railing, took one giant breath, and jumped—”
“Like this, Mommy?” Mei asks, demonstrating the book scene as best she can. She takes a deep breath and jumps on the bed, collapsing in a fit of laughter next to me.
“Just like that! Good job.” I praise her. She often likes to act out scenes from her stories, and I encourage her imagination. “Now get back here, wiggle worm, and listen to the rest.”
Mei settles in for the rest of her story, and before the secret princess even reaches the castle, my own little princess is fast asleep. I make sure she’s tucked in and kiss her forehead, whispering sweet dreams before sliding off the bed. My bruised ribs feel better each day and only twinge painfully when I twist a certain way.
I turn to the door and nearly have a heart attack, slamming my hand over my mouth to buffer the scream from escaping. Raphael leans against the doorjamb with one shoulder, his arms crossed over his chest. He runs his eyes over my body in a lazy motion with a teasing half smile.
I take him in too, blaming the ache it causes between my legs on the ridiculous amount of drinks this afternoon into dinner.
“I like the new haircut,” he admires as I walk closer.
I shift my hair to the side, exposing the light pink highlights underneath. “Really? I don’t know about the color. Gabriella suggested it, and then Rose insisted, and then Evie guilt-tripped me, and then…” I sigh hard, looking down at the color. “And then they got Mei involved. And how can I say no to my daughter? She even got a haircut and has some cute pink extensions.”
“I think it looks great.” Raphael’s deep timbre sends a shiver down my spine, forcing me to look up into his face. His eyes blaze in the shadows his hair creates around his face. I watch him lift his hand in my periphery but don’t break contact with his eyes as it draws closer. His hand brushes down my hair, snagging a lock of the pink strands around his fingers. The hitch of my breath turns his eyes from a bright hazel to a dark amber. He gazes at me with a distant look as if grappling with his thoughts, uncertain of his next step or words to utter.
“Thank you.” My whispered gratitude breaks the moment between us.
Raphael drops his hand and steps back, clearing his throat as he does.
An awkward moment of silence envelops us. Raphael looks like he’s about to turn and leave, and the stupid part of my heart still alive after years of abuse forces my mouth open.
“Your clothes are different, and your hair is wet,” I observe and take a step closer, grabbing the door handle as I do. Mei has just fallen asleep, and I don’t want our conversation to wake her.
His lips bloom into a small smile as he steps back to give me room to close the bedroom door.
“Follow me.” He heads down the hall, and I follow without question.
Raphael leads me to an outdoor seating area, where the glow of a gas fireplace fills the air with a comforting warmth against the chilly night air.
“Well?”
“Well, what?” He repeats, and if I didn’t know any better, I’d say his tone is borderline playful.
“Your clothes and hair. Are you going to answer me?”
“You didn’t ask a question.”
I open my mouth, ready to argue…but pause because he’s right. Raphael meets my glower look with a wink, and now I know he’s being playful on purpose.
“Fine. Why are your clothes different and your hair wet?”
“I took a shower.” He answers like it should have been obvious.
“You took…a shower,” I repeat. “Why?”
Raphael chuckles low, and the vibrating sound reignites that foreign ache in me. “You’re very curious tonight.”
“I’m a doctor. It’s what I do.”
Raphael laughs again and reaches behind him. “I enjoy hearing you say you’re a doctor.”
I do too. It’s a truth I’ve long since buried under years of abusing my license, abusing what medicine stands for. It got to a point where I started to consider myself as someone with a knowledge of medicine, and that’s it. Because I didn’t deserve to carry the title.
Raphael brings his hand back, holding a wrapped box I don’t remember seeing before. He sets it in front of me, and I glance down at the black wrapping paper and cute bright red bow in the corner.
“What is this?”
“What does it look like?” Again with that playful tone.
“A gift.”
“Ding, ding,” he singsongs.
“But Christmas is in a couple of days. Don’t you want to wait?”
“You’re stalling.” He calls me out. “Besides, it’s not really a gift you should open around others.”
I frown and narrow my eyes at his cryptic clue. “Why?”
“Just open it.”
I pull the bow off and playfully stick it to the top of my head. Whoever wrapped it did a wonderful job. The corners are even and tight and better than anything I’ve ever wrapped before. The perfection and attention to detail almost makes me feel guilty about ripping into it, but I’m too curious to wait.
The wrapping paper falls away to reveal a simple white box with a lid. Pulling it off, I find a layer of tissue beneath it. I lift it away to see…
“Is–is that—” I pause because maybe the dark is playing tricks on me. But no…what lies on the tissue is very real. “Is that a...dick in a box?”