32. Lily
Lily
32
The second I’m alone, I’m off the bed, straightening my clothes and looking for a way out. I try the door, hoping like a fool that he left it unlocked, but of course he didn’t. Wouldn’t want his prized possession to escape.
I spin around, examining every surface of the room for anything I can use as a weapon, but the room is as empty as a cell. Besides a bed, there’s a nightstand and a built-in desk in the corner and the tiny-ass windows that I’d be lucky to get a leg through, even if they could open.
I’m crawling under the bed in search of something I can use from the frame when there’s a knock on the door. I freeze, my head snapping in the direction, and wait. I wait for it to open and for Xiao to storm in, intent on finishing what he started, but it remains closed.
Maybe if I stay quiet, they’ll go away.
But then a second knock echoes.
“Miss?” It’s a woman’s voice. “May I come in?”
“Please go away,” I say loud enough for her to hear. “I’d like to be left alone.”
“I-I know, but…” she stammers, fear evident in her tone, which tells me exactly what I already know. She’s as much of a prisoner as I am. “I need to get you ready.”
“Ready for what?”
“Dinner.”
I consider my options for a long moment. I could just refuse, but Xiao would no doubt send a guard, or worse…he would come get me himself. Backed into a corner, I wiggle my way out from under the bed and open the door.
A young Chinese girl stands on the other side, holding a garment bag in one hand and a metal case in the other. Behind her is a guard who looks at me with a stern expression, reminding me again that escape is impossible. So I step aside to let the girl in before slamming the door in the guard’s smug fucking face, enjoying it immensely when I hear him curse behind the closed door.
The girl sets her items down on the bed and looks back at me. With a tentative smile, she says, “My name is Sasha.”
“Lily.”
“I know,” she answers in a mousey tone.
“Do you know where my daughter is?”
Sasha shakes her head. “I haven’t seen her.”
“But she’s on board?”
“I believe so. But I’m really not sure. They don’t tell me anything except what to do.”
Knowing Xiao, he’ll use Mei as a bargaining chip against me, a way to control me like he’s done before. If I play along and do what he says, then I’ll get to see my daughter.
Sasha leads me across the hall to a bathroom, where she stands and waits for me to shower. Being under the water reminds me too much of Raphael, and the memories are painfully sweet.
Will he come after us? Does he even know where we are? What if Emilia concocts some bullshit story about me? Something like, I ran away to return willingly to Xiao. And what if Raphael believes her? Silly thought, I know, because he would never believe a single word out of her mouth…but the doubt still lingers. Mostly because if he believes her, then that means he won’t be coming for me and Mei.
After a quick shower, Sasha helps me into a skintight little red number that barely covers my ass and chest. Just how Xiao likes it. If he wasn’t so insanely jealous, I’d be naked all the time.
Sasha applies a stupid amount of makeup, another favorite of Xiao, avoiding my split lip as best she can and covering the blooming bruises on my cheek. After she blows out my hair and leaves it to hang in blond waves down my back, she steps back to admire my reflection in the mirror.
“You look beautiful.”
I don’t even bother looking and instead stand to slip on the heels she brought. “Thank you for your help.”
Outside, a guard waits to take me to wherever Xiao waits. As I slip by Sasha, she squeezes my hand as if to give me strength. Or maybe she does it for herself. Either way, I squeeze back.
The guard leads me to the upper deck. The sun is just beginning to set over the open water as Miami fades further from view. It’s a beautiful sight, and in any other situation, one might call this the start of a romantic and wonderful night. But to me, it feels like every mile we sail away is another knot on the noose around my neck.
“Mommy!”
My head whips around fast enough to cause whiplash. Mei sits at a cloth-covered table with a big smile on her face. She jumps down and rushes over to me. The white dress she wears flutters around her ankles, giving glimpses of her shiny black slippers. There’s a matching white headband holding her hair back.
When she collides with my legs, I bend down to physically put hands on her to make sure she’s really here.
“Hi, princess.”
“Doesn’t Mommy look pretty, Mei?”
I look up and see Xiao walking toward us. He’s wearing a dress shirt that matches my red dress with a black suit jacket over it. It’s like the sick bastard is trying to make this into some kind of romantic family date night.
“Yes!” Mei agrees.
Xiao reaches out and grabs my arm, giving me a silent command to stay still as he leans in to kiss me. He doesn’t care that my lip is busted and bruised. He kisses me hard anyhow. Unlike Raphael, who kisses me like he’s treasuring every brush of our lips.
“Come and sit down, baby,” Xiao suggests in a tone that warns me not to ignore him.
His hand slips from my arm to my hand as he pulls me toward the table. Xiao gestures to the seat next to him, and I sit tensely, keeping my back ramrod straight and every muscle rigid and ready to move.
“Our daughter was just about to tell me about your time with Raphael DiAngelo after he took you two from me.”
I swallow hard, my eyes dropping to the table. It’s been decorated for a five-course meal, and I eye the knife set to the right of the plate, wondering if I can somehow take it without Xiao noticing. But then that leaves the next problem of where the hell do I hide it?
Under the table, Xiao sets his hand heavy on my thigh and grips me hard enough to leave a bruise. He knows what I’m thinking, and this is his way of saying I can just forget it.
“Go on, baby girl,” Xiao says to Mei with a fake smile I can see through.
It doesn’t matter what she says, Xiao will somehow find something to latch on to and twist it into something terrible. Like, for example, Raphael made us breakfast, which is innocent and nothing to dissect, but to Xiao, he’ll assume it means that we enjoy his cooking more than Xiao’s personal chef. Which is true, but nothing to get mad about.
“Did he buy you toys?”
Mei nods. “And books for Mommy to read.”
Xiao’s hand tightens on my thigh, his nails biting into my flesh. “That’s nice. Did Raphael read to you too?”
Mei nods again.
“Did you have fun?”
Mei glances at me before lowering her eyes to her hands. No child should have to go through this kind of interrogation. No child should have to lie intentionally to avoid angering her parent. Especially a man who is supposed to be her father. A father is someone who protects their child. Not torment.
“Well, did you?”
Mei shakes her head. “Not really.”
I know she’s lying. So does Xiao.
“He didn’t take you to his parents for Christmas? You didn’t make cookies with him or go to the beach and make sandcastles?”
My head snaps to Xiao. How does he know about any of that? His questions are too precise to be mere guesses. Cookies maybe, but the afternoon we spent at the beach after Dominic’s death? That’s too specific.
The weather that day was unusually warm. Almost like Mother Nature was urging us to leave the chilly, depressive house to indulge in the sun and remember we’re alive. With Dominic’s funeral the next day, it felt like the right thing to do.
“Look, Mommy!” Mei cries out, pulling my attention from the ocean waves. “I made a castle like a princess.”
In no way does her “castle” resemble one, but to her, it does, and I will never smother my daughter’s imagination. I walk over to kneel beside her in the sand and smile widely at her masterpiece. “It’s beautiful, sweetheart! I love it.”
“Maybe Raphael can make it real?” Mei asks. At hearing his name, Raphael glances over. “Like how the fairy made the pumpkin real for Cinderella?”
I smother a laugh because in her own way, she’s just compared Raphael to Cinderella’s fairy godmother. Raphael catches me and narrows his eyes at me playfully.
“Why don’t you ask him, sweetie?”
Mei practically jumps to her feet and rushes over to Raphael. He catches her at the last minute when she stumbles and gently sets her down on the sand beside him. “Can you, Raphael?”
Raphael meets my eyes over my daughter’s head, and I smile gently at him. I always wanted a true and loving father figure for Mei, and in such a short amount of time, Raphael was on the verge of becoming that. Something her real father could never accomplish in the four years of her life.
“Show me what you’ve built first, and we’ll go from there. How does that sound?”
Mei smiles big. “Okay!”
For a few short hours, we enjoyed the break from reality, where we imagined a beautiful castle with a moat, flying horses, and talking candlesticks.
“Did you even miss your Bàba?” Xiao asks like the narcissist asshole he is.
Mei’s on the verge of crying. She doesn’t want to lie to her father because he’ll know she is and get furious. But if she tells him the truth, he’ll also get mad. It’s a double-edged sword either way.
“Of course she did,” I answer for her, trying to redirect Xiao’s building anger to me. “We both did.”
Xiao swings his black eyes on me. With a sneer, he hisses, “Don’t fucking lie to me, woman. The only reason you’re still breathing is because that Italian bastard seems to be entranced with your worthless and used-up body. If it wasn’t for that, you would already be six feet under.”
Mei squeaks at the violence in her father’s tone and starts to cry. I try to move to comfort her, but Xiao grabs my arm in a viselike grip, stopping me.
“Please, Xiao, she’s crying,” I beg.
“Mei is no longer your concern. She is my daughter. You will never see her again. And in time, you will become nothing but a distant memory to her.”
“Xiao, you can’t, please—”
“From the moment you went with DiAngelo, you signed your death warrant.”
Ice shoots down my spine.
“When the bastard comes for you, and he will, I will smile at him while I put a bullet between your eyes before doing the same to him.”
“Bàba, no!” Mei shouts before she jumps off her chair and hurries to my side.
A guard approaches and tries to tear her off me, but I latch on because I know if he takes her, I’ll never see her again.
“Let go, Mei,” Xiao orders. “This instant. Let go of her.”
“No!” Mei cries, gripping harder. “Mommy, please don’t go.”
Another guard grabs my hand wrapped around Mei and forces my fingers back, nearly breaking them before I’m forced to let go. Mei slips from my hold. The guard holds her against his chest to avoid her frantic kicks and flailing arms.
“Please, Xiao! Don’t do this!”
“Mommy! Mommy!” Mei screams as Xiao orders the guard to take her away.
Time slows.
With Xiao’s attention on the guard, my eyes fall to the knife on the table. Through tears, the silver glistens like a sword from one of Mei’s books. I hoped a hero would save us. But maybe there is a hero. Maybe I’ve been the hero all along. And sometimes the heroes don’t live. Sometimes they take the villain down with them.
Without a second thought, I grab the knife and lunge for Xiao. My first stab makes contact with his upper back. He cries out, reaching back in instinct to grab for the knife. But in my frenzy, I’m faster. I pull the knife out and stab him again in the same general area. Hot blood gushes from the wounds, covering us both, but I don’t care. I’m about to stab a third time when arms wrap around my middle and pull me off Xiao.
“No!” I scream, kicking and trying to stab the person holding me. A guard wrenches the knife free from my hand and tosses it to the side. “I need to kill him! Let me go!”
Xiao turns toward me, his face bloody and furious. “You bitch! I was going to wait to kill you, but you’re more trouble than that’s worth. I’ll just dump your severed head on Raphael’s front porch.”
He holds his hand out, and a guard places a pistol in his palm. Adrenaline pumps through my body, but everything freezes when I see the gun.
The instinct to flight takes over, and I thrash in the guard’s arms.
My fear of leaving Mei alone with Xiao threatens. I failed her as a mother. I failed to protect her.
I was so close to a happy ever after. But at least for a moment…I got to feel what it’s like to be loved. To be treasured and cherished.
Xiao cocks his gun back.
And then the air is pierced by the deafening sound of a bullet being fired.