Chapter Twelve #4
“Yeah, oh, shit!” I paced the length of the room, pleased for once that it wasn’t overrun with a dozen panting wolves reeking of sweat and fleas.
That is, of course, because I snapped them all out of the room the second I stepped inside of it—which set the furry fuck off complaining again. I swore, how Charlotte could stand his nonstop whining, I’d never know.
“What does this mean?”
Tristan flashed me a look over the mirror’s frame. “Seriously, Belphe, don’t pretend like you need me to be your mortal whisperer. You know exactly what Charlotte means. You know exactly what you’ve done.”
I roared up on him, snarl bleeding from my lips—
—and dropped to my knees. “I know. Oh, fuck, I know what I’ve d-done.
” I clutched my head, digging the heels of my palms into my eyes.
“But, gods, what do I do? Everything I did was to protect Charlotte, but she can’t even look at me now.
She shaved off her hair because I touched it!
” I choked—the band wrenched around my chest squeezing tighter. “Fuck. What do I do?”
“Whoa, man...” There was a thump from the oversized fat-ass dropping down in front of me. “Are you like... crying?” Tristan seized my hair and yanked me up, confirming it with his own eyes. “Ugh. Pathetic.”
Wham!
I socked him right in the mouth, tearstained fist and all.
“Ow.” Tristan cracked his jaw, wincing. He spat a glob of blood at my feet. “But I’ll give you that one. I deserved it.”
“It wasn’t supposed to be like this.” I didn’t recognize the wretched, pitiful sound coming from my throat. “All I wanted was to have her. To own her and keep her and fuck her and tempt a god into giving me a womb so I could have her half-bred babies.”
“Yikes.”
“But now it’s all so fucked up.” Visions of a wild-eyed Charlotte slicing her lips haunted my mind...
but not as screamingly loud as her declaring that she’d never love me.
“What am I supposed to do? All these weird thoughts keep going through my head, and I’m feeling all this stuff I don’t understand.
“Like, when she cries, I don’t want to point and laugh or hit her with something heavy, I just keep wanting to hold her in my arms as I set fire to any and everything that’s stolen her smile.
And once when she was walking through the halls, that shit Dirk stuck out his foot and tried to trip her, and I ripped it off his leg and stuffed it in his mouth so fast, she didn’t even know what happened by the time he started screaming.
But when my favorite nanny unknowingly walked backward off a cliff and fell into a lake of lava, all I did was laugh my ass off. ”
“Course you did. Sounds hilarious.”
“It was.”
I tossed my head as more strange liquid fell from my eyes.
“I don’t know what she’s done to me. I keep looking at her and thinking I could have sex with her and only her every day for the rest of my life, and never tire of her or want anyone else, but that can’t be right, can it?
” I burst out. “Monogamy? Who the fuck does that!”
“No one I know,” Tristan mused. He fell back against the dresser, gazing at the same expression on Charlotte’s face that’s been plaguing me ever since I saw it.
“But here I am thinking the same thoughts. Even though it’s my duty to repopulate the pack with as many strong alpha sons and daughters as possible, the thought of smashing anyone’s ass that isn’t Charlie’s makes me puke.
Is this that love stuff that Charlie was going on about? ”
I nodded gravely. “It’s gotta be. Charlotte said when you’re cursed by love, you want to do crazy shit like sacrifice your own wants and needs to make the other person happy.”
“Wait. Even if it makes you unhappy?!”
“Even then.”
“Whoa, that’s a head-fucker,” he breathed, head clunking against his dresser.
“So me wanting to throw away everything I’ve fought and killed to achieve, just in the hopes that Charlie will let me remain at her side...
is a symptom of the curse.” Tristan growled, rubbing the back of his neck. “This shit’s unreal.”
I scoffed, glaring at him. “You think you’re tripping? I’m the one who has to wake up tomorrow morning without her.”
Tristan glared right back. “Are you serious? Dumbass! Thanks to you and your phone tricks, so do I!”
Oh, yeah, that. I forgot. “This isn’t about you,” I gritted. “I’ve lived two hundred and twelve years without her, and two months with her, and there’s no contest for which time of my afterlife was most worth living. So tell me how to get her back. How do I make her smile again?”
Tristan’s gaze was serious. “Belphe. You already know the answer to this one.”
My face hardened to stone—tears evaporating. “And you know why it’s not an option, No-Name, so stop fucking around.”
He sighed like I was stomping on his nerves. “Fine. If you’re choosing the hard way, there’s only one thing you can do now.” Despite the topic, a grin stole over his punchable face. “It’s a good thing you’re not the prince of pride, because this is the part where you grovel.”