Chapter 9 Silent Stacks #4
“No,” I say. “It’s not a big deal. I just need to get through graduation and I’ll be fine.”
“Chloe... if we hadn’t come up, they one hundred percent would have raped you. You also know that guys like that will see it as a challenge and keep coming after you,” Dillon says.
“Yeah. Some people just don’t take no for an answer,” I say bitterly. I immediately regret saying that because they wanted to take me to dinner. They weren’t trying to hurt me. Did they go about it the wrong way? Absolutely, but they didn’t mean any harm.
“Chloe, honey... I promised your father when he was dying that I would treat you the same way I would my own daughter. Now... I don’t have kids, but I know damn well your father wouldn’t give you a choice, would he?” Aaron asks.
“No,” I say with a sigh.
“What would he tell you?”
“That my safety is more important than my pride,” I say. “That’s what he said when he made me quit softball because none of the coaches or the school would make accommodations so that I wouldn’t have to travel with them.”
“Okay then,” he says. “You have three weeks left in this semester and I’ll move you into the apartment over Christmas break.
Until then, I don’t care if I have to walk you to and from each class and the dining hall.
I will make sure you are safe. As far as the guys, I will check the cameras.
If I catch it on camera, they will automatically be expelled. ”
“Oh, so they can come after me for getting them kicked out months before graduation?” I ask.
“They can be mad in jail because that’s where the footage will go,” he says.
“Oh, because that went swimmingly for me last time,” I snap.
“You have Connor and Dillon here as witnesses, plus cameras,” Aaron says.
“We will walk with her until she can get off campus,” Dillon says. “Even after, we will make sure she gets around okay.”
“Thank you, guys. She cleans the library every morning during the week so I can come hang out with her then.”
“We are up there most mornings anyway. We can go help her so she’s not alone in there.” Connor says.
“Well, that settles that,” Aaron says. “Chloe... let them help, okay?”
“I feel like I don’t really have a choice,” I deadpan.
“No, you don’t,” Aaron says. “You kids be good.”
“We will,” Dillon says. He stands and opens the door for Aaron only to see someone standing there with a pizza.
“Enjoy your food,” Aaron says. “And Chloe?”
“Yeah?” I sigh.
“Next time you lie to me and tell me everything is okay when it’s not... I’ll call your mom. Okay?”
“Okay,” I say.
Dillon brings the pizza in and sets it on my desk before sitting next to me.
I groan dramatically, lay back on my bed, and then drape my arm over my eyes.
Dillon and Connor both lie down next to me and prop up on their elbow to look at me.
I can feel them staring at me. It doesn’t make me nervous the way it does when Max or Elias did it.
I know, now, that I am safe with them. Their presence is comforting and welcome, if I'm being honest with myself.
“Why are you two staring at me?” I ask.
“Just curious what you are thinking about,” Connor says as he pulls my arm off of my face.
“Well,” I say. “This is the first time I have ever let anyone but Aaron in my dorm.”
“Not even your mom?” Dillon asks.
“My mom sort of lost her marbles after dad died,” I say.
“She is in a mental health facility after she attempted suicide. She tried to hang herself, but the rope snapped. She has issues with her long term memory but she can remember a few days at a time. I call her every few days so she doesn’t forget who I am.
She knows I’m in college, but she can’t really remember anything beyond that. ”
“Fuck, that’s awful,” Connor says.
“I think she was always unwell. Dad was just the person who grounded her and kept her from giving up. When he died... I basically lost both of them. She doesn’t even remember that he’s dead half of the time.”
“What would happen if he told your mom?” Dillon asks.
“She would call me,” I sigh. “She remembers some big things like when I was born, her and Dad getting married, and when she came up to the hospital after I was raped. I had pretty extensive bruising and I think it traumatized Mom and Dad to see me like that. If he were to call her and tell her that someone tried to hurt me and I was trying to lie about it, she would guilt me into opening up. She knows she has memory issues because she writes everything down that she can.”
“Why doesn’t she write down things about you so she can recall them?” Connor asks.
“Because she’s reminded that she’s missing all of these milestones with me, and it sets her back a lot. If she tries to remind herself about Dad, it triggers a whole mess of emotions. It’s easier on her and the staff that she just doesn’t remember,” I explain.
“Your Dad went fast, didn’t he?” Dillon asks.
“Yeah. He went from having a slight headache for a week to being cremated in two months. One day he and I were playing catch and the next he was diagnosed with stage four Glioblastoma. Once the symptoms started, they piled on so fast that he couldn’t keep up in order to even begin trying to fight it.
It’s the most aggressive type of cancer and they gave him a year at best, but we got nine weeks, two days, and six hours.
The day I graduated high school was the last day I spent with him awake and out of the hospital.
I think his body held on for as long as it could so he could see me graduate and become an adult,” I explain.
“He died, Mom tried to kill herself the night of the funeral, I got a last-minute scholarship with Aaron’s help, and I started here in the fall.
I lost every single friend from high school when he died and obviously, I don’t have any friends here. ”
“That’s...” Dillion starts to say.
“A lot. I know. Sorry I just dumped that on you guys,” I say as I go to sit up. He pulls me back down and turns my face toward him.
“I was going to say that it’s unfair that you had to endure all of that,” Dillon says. “You didn’t deserve the bullshit we did to you.”
“I know,” I say. “I also know that you didn’t mean harm. I think you saw it as innocent fun until you knew the facts about my life. That put it all into perspective and you realize you were douche bags to me.”
“What can we do to make it up to you?” he asks.
“Be honest with me, for starters,” I say. “What is your goal?”
“Honestly?” Connor asks. I turn to him and nod. He glances up at Dillion for a moment before looking back at me.
“We want to be with you,” he says. “In any way you’ll let us have you. You are sassy and have never taken our shit. I guess it’s the whole want what you can’t have thing, but you are different with us than when we’ve seen others fuck with you,” he says.
“First, it’s because you two never take it to an extreme. You annoy the hell out of me, but you’ve never hurt me. Not like them at least,” I say. “I won’t lie... it’s super fucking hurtful that you two kept calling me charity.”
“I know... and we want to make it up to you,” Connor says. “All we are asking for is a shot to prove to you that we are more than the childishness that we have shown you.”
“In an ideal world, what way would you have me?” I ask.
“I won’t bullshit you, Chloe. If given the chance, we’d fuck you until you couldn’t remember your name,” Connor says. “But I want that long term. I want us to be able to do that every single day if we wanted.”
“Why?” I ask.
“I... have no idea. I don’t know what it is about you, but you are not like the other girls here.
You aren’t looking for dollar signs or really anything.
You do what needs to be done and the more I learn about you the more I crave to be close to you,” Connor says.
“I know Dillon is on the same page with me.”
“Very much so,” Dillon says.
“So here is where I stand,” I say. “I trust you two in the sense that I know you won’t hurt me. It took me a second to get here, but the fact that I am laying on my bed with the two of you and I’m not panicked says a lot.”
“I’m glad you trust us,” Connor says.
“I’m trying to not be a perv,” Dillon admits and I laugh.
“Go ahead. What do you want to ask?” I ask.
“Do you have a CNC kink?” he asks. “Also, is it bad that I want you, to want us to chase you?”
“It’s not bad unless you don’t want it to be consensual,” I say. “But to answer your question... Yes. I do.”
“What does that look like for you?” he asks.
“Well... I have only had sex once in the last four years, and even before that it was only a few times. I will be honest and say that I am inexperienced, but I know enough from my last... encounter what I am okay with and what I’m not,” I say.
“The only hard limit I have found, and I have zero interest in trying is fisting or fluid that isn’t come.
I am okay with impact play so long as it doesn’t leave permanent marks or bruises. ”
“So, this guy you slept with. Who was he?” Dillon asks.
“Someone old enough to be my father,” I laugh. “He was nice, and he explained everything as we got to it. I... gave him a fake number. I think he knew I would do that though. He didn’t push for much information because he knew I was in a bad place, and I wanted it to be a one-time thing.”
“So, are you talking like... overpower you and use you as we see fit?” Connor asks.
“Yeah. I’d have a safe word. If I use it, we stop instantly.
Otherwise, you’d keep my boundaries in mind,” I say.
“Some will not even accept a no and you’d have to actually say the safe word to end it.
If I said no or showed anything viewed as real resistance, it’s just a matter of asking me for the safe word so I had a chance to really consider if that’s what I meant. ”
“You keep talking like that, I am going to think you want us to,” Connor says seriously.