Chapter 84 Christianna
Chapter eighty-four
Christianna
Upon entering the house, I am greeted by the warm, comforting scents of Cajun cooking. Meg barely restrains herself from pouncing on me.
I return the embrace, as she holds me tight, only breaking when the guys move past us.
“Tell David dinner smells delicious, and we will be in shortly. I need to wash up and talk to Erik and Remy before we come in.”
Meg nods and gives an uncertain smile to Remy before heading back to the kitchen.
Erik has moved to stand behind Remy. I hear the soft scrape of dog bowls in the butler’s pantry.
“I need to wash up,” I say. “Do you want to come upstairs while I do? I want to finish what I started to tell you.”
“If you’re comfortable,” Remy murmurs, falling into step behind me.
I have not done a very good job of finishing moving in. We have the essentials. Nothing more. I close my eyes briefly as we enter my bedroom, then head for the bathroom to wash my hands.
When I return, both of them are sitting at the end of the oversized bed.
I stop near the wall.
“This isn’t easy.” I force my hands still and make myself look at them. “You have both been incredibly kind and patient. I want you to know I’m not broken, and I don’t need a white knight.”
My smile is small, sad. “I’m a survivor, and I come with some baggage. Before I consider a relationship, I need to prove to myself that I can stand on my own two feet. If later you are willing to deal with my bullshit, great. But right now, I need to be focused on me.”
Erik watches me carefully. “This is the no you were referring to earlier?”
I nod.
“Can we still compose together?” he asks. “This is as much yours as mine. It would not be sensible to leave it behind.”
My heart constricts. “Yes. We can still compose together.”
Remy studies me. “Tell me how you want this to go. Do you want us to stop coming over?”
“I like having you come over,” I say. “I am not ready for you to stay here, despite the convenience. I think weekends to myself. I will work with you, and you are welcome here. We can play it by ear.”