Chapter 5
FIVE
JESSICA
Iwouldn’t say Kane was exactly my boyfriend, but let’s pretend for argument’s sake that he was.
Let’s pretend the nights we shared actually meant something beyond just sex.
Well, if that were true, guess what’s worse than seeing your ‘boyfriend’ with another girl?
Checking your phone every hour only to be hit with a fresh wave of disappointment when you realize he hasn’t reached out.
Not once. Not even a sorry. And that hurts me even more, because I shouldn’t want him to contact me. Not after he cheated.
Kane’s not sorry. He doesn’t care. The fact is, he never cared.
As expected, he led me on, made me fall for him despite my better judgment, then moved on to someone else. So, what am I supposed to do now? Carry on as if nothing happened? Is that it?
Trust me, I’d love to do that. However, I’m not bulletproof, despite what everyone around me seems to think. Life has been pretty tough lately, so yeah, I hate to admit that he hurt me.
Part of me thought I could finally have something good in my life, but as usual, the joke was on me. When isn’t it?
I shoulder my bag and switch off the light on my nightstand. For the first few days, I could barely get out of bed and stayed home with a stomach bug. It seemed easier that way, but no matter how tempting it is to ignore life, I can’t hide away forever.
Hell, I have to face the world sooner or later, so I might as well do it today. Rain has messaged the group chat to say she’s waiting for me and Summer outside.
I turn to see Chris leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed over his broad chest, watching me closely.
He’s dressed for work in his coveralls, the fabric dark enough to hide most stains, though the seams are permanently shadowed.
The uniform is clean in the only way a mechanic’s can be.
Washed, yes, but oil has long claimed the cuffs and collar.
“What’s up with you?”
I throw some of the dirty clothes on the floor into the overflowing hamper, then snatch my cell from the desk. “I don’t have time for this.”
Chris blocks the doorway when I try to move past. “I wasn’t asking.”
I glare at him, and he matches the hard stare with his own. Sometimes, I wish my brother weren’t so perceptive. My life would be much easier if he fell in love with a girl and spent every waking hour at her place instead of bothering me all the time.
“Did Ravencourt do something to upset you?” He tilts his head slightly, his searching eyes flicking between mine with an unrelenting intensity that would make Summer spill her deepest secrets, but I’m not her, and I don’t have time for this.
“Rain is waiting.”
Chris stares at me long and hard before shouting for Summer, who stumbles out of her bedroom looking flustered in a cute pale blue summer dress, with one sandal on and the other still in her hand.
“What?” she asks, putting it on.
“Let Rain know I’m driving Jessica today.” The finality in my brother’s low tone makes me want to argue just for the sake of it, but I settle for biting my tongue instead.
This isn’t the first time he’s taken it upon himself to stick his nose in my business. Usually, it would be enough to spark a heated argument between us, but I don’t have the fight in me today.
He cares, and that’s more than can be said for most people in my life.
Summer looks uncertainly between us, and I offer a reassuring smile, which she takes as her cue to leave. She’s had to endure our fighting one too many times lately, over the smallest of things.
When the front door shuts, Chris gives me an expectant look, as if I’ll divulge my innermost feelings just because he demands it.
“Well,” I say impatiently, gesturing for him to move. “Are you driving me or what?”
He studies me for a beat without remarking on my snappy attitude, then leans in close. “Did Ravencourt hurt you?”
I can smell the grease and oil on his coveralls, mixed with his cologne and the scent of peppermint shampoo in his towel-dried hair.
“No, he didn’t hurt me.”
Yes, I’m lying. Sue me.
I’d rather drink boiling tar than admit to my brother that he was right all along.
He’s already insufferable as it is without the truth coming out, and it’s safe to say he wouldn’t be able to keep his smugness in check if he found out about the breakup.
That doesn’t mean, however, that he won’t beat him up, because he definitely will. There’s no doubt about that.
My brother, in some twisted quest for justice, would happily rearrange Kane’s face and make an enemy of the most powerful family in town. I can’t just stand by and let that happen. I won’t.
And it’s not because I worry about Kane. Trust me, I don’t. We all know he can handle himself.
My brother, on the other hand, needs to be careful about who he provokes. The founding families are dangerous. Everyone knows that.
“Jessica,” he warns, but I’m finished here.
I cross my arms, mirroring his stance, and he steps back with a heavy sigh. “Let’s go.”
The drive to college is quiet. Chris, lost in his own thoughts, drives with one hand, his elbow resting on the door panel and his head in his hand. To the outside world, he looks relaxed and at ease, maybe even bored, but I can see how tense he actually is.
I stare blankly at the passing streets outside, wondering how I’ll find enough energy to care about anything.
My studies, the housework that keeps piling up, money.
We have no food left at home. I need to go grocery shopping later.
“Look,” my brother starts, shifting his weight, “if you wanna talk, I’m here.”
“I don’t.”
What could we possibly talk about?
He looks at me, and I shake my head with a tired sigh. “Talk, that is. I don’t wanna talk.”
Chris rubs his hair vigorously in an aggravated move that reveals his frustration, then slows down as we approach a set of lights. “You’ve been acting weird this past week.”
“I’ve been sick.”
“You always were crap at lying.”
“You always pushed when it wasn’t welcome.”
He snorts, half amused, half annoyed. “Because you’re like a vault.”
“I wonder where I got that from.” The words slip from my lips in a murmur as we watch strangers cross the sidewalk, rushing to their destinations.
“I’m worried about you, sis,” he says softly, revealing a gentler side I mostly associate with young Chris before life hardened him. “I heard you cry the other night.”
I instantly stiffen.
Just then, the lights turn green, and Chris hits the gas, driving with an ease that reminds me of Kane, only his Bugatti is way more expensive than this rust bucket.
“Wanna tell me why?” he asks, ignoring his phone when it starts ringing on the center console.
“Not really.”
“Dammit, Jessica.” He takes another turn too fast, and I brace my hand against the glovebox. “Don’t think I don’t know this is about Ravencourt. This is a small town, remember? People gossip.”
Of course they do. It’s not like they have anything better to do.
Glancing in the side mirror, I narrow my eyes when I spot a silver Honda a few cars back. I’ve seen it around quite a bit lately.
My brother shifts his gaze between me and the road.
“Jessica, are you listening?”
I tear my attention away from the side mirror. “Hmm?”
“Unfuckingbelievable,” Chris mutters, shaking his head.
He wants to say more, but we’re pulling into the college parking lot, and I twist in the seat to watch the silver Honda pass by and disappear down the road.
I can’t shake the feeling that I’m being watched.
It might be my imagination, of course, but something tells me it’s not.
After Chris parks, he watches the college through the windshield with a disapproving look, as if he thinks Kane will be waiting for me somewhere.
He already knows Kane doesn’t go to college here in the Falls. Why would he? This place is beneath Kane and his pressed underwear.
Still, he glares at the tiny brick building as if Kane is inside right now, just waiting to ambush me.
Shaking off the strange feeling from seeing that silver car again, I scoff and grab my bag from the footwell.
Chris’s imploring stare burns into me as I open the door.
“This conversation isn’t over, sis.”
The promise behind his words follows me out, and I turn to see him reverse out of the space before he drives away, his brake lights flashing briefly as he joins the traffic on the main road.
“Yes, it is,” I say quietly.