29. Gabriella
29
Gabriella
“ G abriella!” Dimitri shouts, but I’m already through the front door and rushing outside. “Stop!”
I don’t know where I’m going, but anywhere is better than here right now. The door to the cabin swings open and then slams shut behind me. I can feel him following after me. He’s always had this kind of gravity about him that draws me in, and now I know why.He was trained to be that way. Trained to be charismatic enough to gain someone’s trust. Just like he did to me. Everything I know about him is a lie.
“Leave me alone, Dimitri!” I yell. “You fucking lied to me.”
“I never lied to you,” he answers.
Anger surges through me, and I stop on a dime, swinging around to face him. He’s so close, he has to stop suddenly or risk running into me. There’s a visible struggle on his face as he wrestles with the urge to reach out for me before he ultimately decides against it.
“You’re lying right now,” I hiss at him. “Lying about not lying!”
“Gabriella, please come back inside so I can explain. It’s not what you think.”
“So you’re not an FBI agent?”
He sighs. “No, that bit is true.”
I forcefully push him back, watching the shock register on his face when he loses his balance and stumbles backwards.
“Leave me alone,” I order before spinning back around on my heel and resuming my walk to nowhere.?
“Gabriella, where are you going to go?” he asks.?
“Away from you.”
“There’s nothing but woods for miles.”
“Then I guess I’m walking for miles.”
“It’s too dangerous,” he continues. “There are snakes and gators and bears out there. Not to mention it’s dark.”
“All of that sounds better than staying here with you.”Not really, but I just need to think without him lingering nearby, distracting me.
“Gabriella, do not go into those woods.”
“What are you going to do, agent? Arrest me?”
“Don’t tempt me,” he growls back.
My mind replays the memory of when we used handcuffs one night. I remember thinking they looked a little too authentic to be a bedroom prop. Instead of anger, the memory sends a rush of excitement through my body. God, what is wrong with me?
I throw him one last glance before I dart into the dark forest and ignore his shout of protest. He’s right—it’s absolutely dangerous to be running through the woods at night without proper clothing or protection with a sprained wrist while also pregnant. Let’s not forget that. The reminder is enough for me to slow down to a brisk walk, holding my good arm out as a pathetic excuse for a barrier as I stomp my way through the underbrush. The movement and sounds should be enough to keep anything dangerous from me. Except Dimitri. I can hear him following behind me and he’s gaining ground.
“I said leave me alone, Dimitri.”
“Do you even know where you’re going?”
“Away from you.” If I stay going in this direction, I should eventually reach the road we turned off of. After that, I’ll walk to the closest house and call my brothers. And after that? Well…I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it.
“Gabriella, enough of this. You could hurt your injured arm even more or something worse might happen.”
“Like staying with you is any better? You’re an FBI agent, Dimitri. You’re the very definition of dangerous,” I argue back.
“Never to you. I would never hurt you.”
“Oh yeah? Well, you’re hurting me now.”
My ankle snags on a rock and I curse out loud as I stumble, barely catching myself in time before I fall on my face.
“Gabriella! For fuck’s sake.”
Growling under my breath, I push forward. The brush grows thicker and slows my progress, just enough for Dimitri to catch up with me. His hand latches around my upper arm and swings me around to face him.
The moon is full in the cloudless night sky high above. Its rays of light filtering in through the tree canopy provide just enough for me to make out his face, and see the torment and emotional rage in his eyes. Almost like he’s the one hurt, the one lied to and betrayed.
“Just let me explain,” he pleads.
“How long?” I ask instead.
“What?”
“How long have you been spying on my family?”
He frowns, his face torn between which lie to tell me.
“I swear to all things holy, Dimitri. If you lie to me again, you will never see me again.”
My threat seems to do the trick because the hesitation disappears from his face as he sighs. “I’ve lost track of the time, but it’s been a couple of years now.”
“Why?” The pain of hearing the truth out loud hurts more than I thought it would.
“At first it was just to uncover the truth about the High Table, but then it became something more when we tracked the human trafficking auctions to Miami.”
The words spill from his mouth so easily and so flawlessly, almost like a burden is being lifted from his shoulders that it can’t be anything but the truth. Doesn’t make it any easier to hear, though.
“Would you have ever told me?”
The hesitation returns to his face, not because he’s about to lie, but because he knows the truth is going to hurt.?
“I don't know.”
I twist my arm free and step back. The sad part is he allows me. Bowing my head, a rush of hot tears fills my eyes before they fall like twin scalding rivers down my cheeks.
“Were you just going to leave one day, then? Disappear after tearing my family apart and sending them to jail?”
“Yes, but—”
My head snaps up, and I level him with a cruel gaze.“You fucking bastard,” I cry before I shove at him. When he barely moves, it only fuels my anger. “If that’s true, why couldn’t you just leave me alone after the miscarriage? Why did you have to start things up between us again? How could you be so fucking cruel? Was I just another whore for you to stick your cock into? Why bother starting things between us at all?”
Like a statue, Dimitri stands completely frozen, his face devoid of expression and his eyes as cold as ice as I fire off question after question.How can he act like this doesn’t hurt him too? Why doesn’t he care?
“Answer me!” I shout, shoving at him again. I do it over and over until my hands transform into fists and then I’m slamming them against his chest. My vision blurs as my racing heart pounds in my ears. My chest tightens, and it grows difficult to breathe. I’m panicking, falling headfirst into a dark maze of despair, with no way out. “Why tell me now? Why couldn’t you just leave me alone? Why?” My words come out choked and a second later, all strength leaves my legs. I collapse forward into him and his arms instinctively come up to circle around my waist.
We fall to our knees together on the damp forest floor. As I sob uncontrollably, he doesn’t release me, but runs one hand up and down my back in a soothing manner, pressing the other tightly to my back, keeping me glued to him.
As the sound of my sobs fades away, his voice breaks the silence with a mixture of vulnerability and sadness. “Because I fell in love.”
I pull back and raise my face to stare up at him. Our eyes meet and I only see genuine pain in the icy depths. Pain from a truth so profound he feels stripped raw.
"What?" I whisper. “You love me?”
Dimitri nods, his eyes never leaving mine. “So much so that I am here on my knees begging you to please stop running and just listen to me, because I think you love me, too. At least I thought you did before last night.”
I do love him. I don’t know why. I definitely shouldn’t given his confession but I can’t explain it. It’s like the stupid fairy tale loving romantic little girl living in my heart has taken control of my mind and has put her foot down demanding we listen to him. Because he loves me and I love him and love deserves to be given a chance.? The thought reminds me of the twins growing inside me. Our babies. His babies that he doesn’t even know about yet. And it seems only fair, only right that if he’s going to bare it all, then so should I. It could change everything between us.
“Okay, I’ll listen,” I concede. “But you need to know something first. Since we’re being honest and all that now.”?
He ignores my little jab. “What is it?”
Here goes nothing. “I’m pregnant.”
Now it’s Dimitri’s turn to appear both shaken and confused. “Wh-what?”
“Pregnant. Me.”
“Are you certain?”
“Very.”
His eyes flick down to my stomach. “Is it…is the baby okay?”
“Babies,” I correct him, secretly enjoying how his eyes go wide in disbelief at the news.?
“Babies,” he repeats. “As in more than one?”
“Twins and yes, they’re okay.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Do I really need to explain the birds and the bees to you?”
“No. I meant how long? How far along are you?”
“Not long. I think they were conceived at the end of November or early December.” It’s hard to say for certain. We weren’t exactly celibate when we started to see one another again.
?Dimitri stands, bringing me with him. “Come on. Let’s get back to the house.”
He takes my hand, and I follow him back through the woods toward the house. I told Dimitri the babies are okay, but concern about them still eats at me. Especially when the lights of the cabin become visible through the treeline, revealing how far I ran. The exertion and additional stress couldn’t have been very safe for them.
Dimitri must be thinking along the same wavelength. “Do you promise not to run off again?”
“Do you have any more surprises?” I mock, earning me a pointed look over his shoulder. “Well?”
“No, angel.” His tone is open and raw and honest. “Just answers.”
“Okay. I won't run.”
He leads me into the cabin and then the couch, helping me sit down like I’m already nine months pregnant. The gesture is unnecessary…but sweet. It’s not until he returns with a basin of water and some washcloths that I suggest a bath instead.
As Dimitri guides me through the house, my eyes eagerly scan the walls for anything personal, but there’s nothing there beyond a few paintings of random nature scenes. Still, there’s enough to spark my curiosity and desire to explore more.?
Dimitri opens the door to a large bedroom—the master, I wager—and disappears through a side door. A moment later, the sound of rushing water meets my ears. The room smells like him, a unique scent of sandalwood and cedar blend I love. Otherwise, the room looks like something straight out of a Home and Garden magazine showcase. Just like the living room, the space is void of anything remotely personal. There’s a giant bed, twin nightstands, a dresser, and a rug. That’s it.
“Gabriella?” Dimitri reappears in the doorway. “Tub’s ready.”
I follow him into a dimly lit, spacious bathroom. The room is filled with the soothing scent of lavender, which emanates from the tub filled with bubbles in the corner beneath frosted windows.
“I’m going to go get you a change of clothes and a towel,” he says before disappearing through a doorway on the other side of the room.
As he does, I strip off my dirty clothes, leaving them in a small pile on the tile floor, before climbing into the tub. The water is the perfect temperature and instantly soothes my tired and sore muscles. Not being able to fully submerge my arm is frustrating, but the comfort the rest of my body feels makes it worthwhile. With a sigh, I lean my head back against the tub’s edge and close my eyes.
“Comfortable?” Dimitri peers down at me with a small smile while he places a fluffy white towel and a small pile of clothes on the edge of the tub.?
“I am. Thank you for drawing this up. It's really nice.”
“Anytime.”
“So…do you have a secret family? Wife and kids?"
He quirks a brow in my direction as he sits on the ledge. “Starting with the inquisition already?”
I narrow my eyes as I remind him, “You said you’d be honest with me and answer my questions.”
“Yes, I did.” He reaches behind me, producing a washcloth before handing it to me. “I don't have a secret family. No wife, no kids," his eyes drop to the bubbles covering my body, "yet. No sisters or brothers. I never knew my dad and my mom passed away from cancer when I was seventeen.”
I wanted the truth, not realizing that it could be unpleasant to hear.
“I’m sorry about your mom.” I couldn’t imagine losing mine and so young, too. “What happened after?”
“Stayed with a friend’s family until I could join the Marines. Did my time until I was in one too many blasts and retired to the Bureau.”?
“How long have you been with them?”
“Before I was sent undercover?” He thinks for a long moment before he finally answers. “Three years.”
I lather up the washcloth and run it over my neck. “Why you?”
“I spoke the best Russian.”
Pausing, I glance at him with surprise. “Seriously? Because you spoke Russian the best?”
He shrugs. “My field experience probably helped.”
I groan in frustration when I try to run the washcloth down my side. Dimitri notices and holds his hand out. “Allow me?”
Without even thinking, my hand instinctively moves to place the washcloth in his, as if it’s second nature to me. When I realize what I’ve done, I meet his eyes and tell him firmly, “Don’t get any funny ideas.”
His smirk, the type that makes my stomach flutter with butterflies, spreads across his face. “My ideas are anything but funny. I can assure you, angel.”
Heat spreads down my body, pooling between my legs. Damn hormones and raging emotions. Clearing my throat, I shift in the tub as I stammer, “Yeah…well…your ideas got us into this mess, so…”
“Fair point,” he concedes. “Lean forward, but be careful to keep your arm out of the water.”
I do as he says, unable to fight back the moan that slips from my lips when he runs the warm, soapy cloth down my back.?
Dimitri pauses, and his voice drops an octave as he warns, “Angel, keep that up, and I can’t be held responsible for what I do next.”
I bite my lip and stay silent. My body wants to betray my mind and I can’t let it. Not until I know everything. "Is this why we couldn't be together?"
"Yes."
"And why you didn't fight to stay after the miscarriage?"
His hand falters before he continues again in soothing circles down my back. "I thought it was best for both of us, but I regret it every day."
Me too. "So then why did you block me?"
This time he stops all together and I peer over my shoulder at him. He stares at me in confusion. "What? I never blocked you."
"I tried calling you the next day and it went straight to voicemail. Like I had been blocked." I don't mean to sound accusing but it still kind of stings.
He looks away and furrows his brow as if he's thinking hard. And then all at once, he blinks several times and his mouth parts like he just remembered something. "Oh, no. I never blocked you. After I left the hospital, I was so angry, not at you, but at the world and I crashed my bike—" I gasp but he waves my concern away and continues, "I wasn't hurt, but I remember my phone broke into pieces. When I got a new one turned on, I never saw a missed call."
"Oh." Shame and embarrassment falls over me as I realize I never gave him the benefit of doubt. I never bothered to think there could have been a reason for it other than being blocked. "I guess I should have left a voicemail."
He huffs under his breath and gives me one of those sweet smiles I like to think he reserves just for me. "Yes, that would have been a good idea." He twirls his finger in a circle, directing me to turn back around.
I do what he says and a second later, he continues washing my back. There's no use crying over spilled tea or wondering what could have happened if I had left a voicemail. All we have now is the present and the two little futures nestled inside my womb. “You said you fell in love with me."
"I do love you."
"And because you love me, you decided to tell me now?"
“Yes.”
“So what was your plan then, after you told me?”
He moves his hand to running the washcloth over my shoulders. I can reach there but I don't bother telling him. “I hadn’t gotten that far to be honest.”
I turn my head. “Really?”
“Yeah, it's not the best of plans, I admit.”
“Not at all.”
His lips twitch. “To be honest, I panicked when you overheard us at the Playground and then after the car accident…I just couldn’t lose you. Not until you heard the truth and could decide after you knew everything.”
I spin in the tub to face him. His hand drops and his eyes immediately go to my chest, covered in bubbles.
“My eyes are up here,” I tell him, gesturing to my face. “It’s a pretty big risk to take, Dimitri, telling me. I could go to my father.”?
As he raises his gaze to me, his eyes mirror the mysterious depths of the deep blue ocean. “Will you?”
Will I? I should.I really should.
“Before you answer, let me say one thing. I never expected to meet you, Gabriella. I definitely never expected to fall in love either. But I’m glad I did because regardless of the outcome, I’m just happy I got to know you, a true angel living in the dark, and that’s all that matters to me.”
As he speaks, his words carry a weight of vulnerability and such raw and genuine emotion that makes it impossible for me to resist the urge to rise on my knees, firmly take hold of his face and share a deep kiss.
“I won’t tell him,” I whisper against his lips. “Because we're going to tell him together.”