CHAPTER 11 #2
As we watched the bird circle over the field in search of prey, the silence became weighted.
So many unspoken things. So much hurt, pain, and anger simmered between us.
If there was ever going to be an opportunity to clear the air, it would be now.
I’d tried to do just that two years ago but had epically failed.
Now that he wasn’t actively trying to kill me, now that no one was around to overhear, I could try again.
For her sake, I needed to.
My heart started to pound, the swirling nerves in my stomach making me feel sick. I opened my mouth anyway, determined to spit out what needed to be said.
“What happened this morning in the bathroom?”
Caught off guard by his question, I swallowed too fast and choked. He dropped his chin to watch me, and I felt heat rush to my face. Great. How much did he already know?
“Nothing,” I quickly replied, hoping my embarrassment wasn’t visible.
He studied me for a painfully long moment before looking out over the field and saying, “You won’t survive this place without allies.”
“So I’ve heard.”
“You also won’t survive if you’re not willing to defend yourself.”
That one gave me pause. I opened my mouth but nothing came out.
“Your demonstration was all flight and no fight. You hid and made yourself look small.”
Ouch.
“You’re not eating enough. You’re not taking up enough space. Continue as you are, and you’ll fail within the week.”
I snapped my gaze to the side of his face. “And what do you care?”
“I don’t. But your failure will reflect poorly on my leadership skills.”
Double ouch but not surprising to hear. Facing forward again, I muttered, “At least you’ll win your bet.”
It was his turn to give me a sharp look.
“Didn’t think I noticed that?” I dryly said. “Everyone here might hate me, but I still pay attention. So what did you bet? That Blaze would kill me before the day was over? Well, he had his chance and failed. Too bad for you that Professor Seacrest intervened.”
He stared at me for another beat, then looked away with a slight head shake.
“Not so observant after all.” Before I could wonder about that statement, he continued, “Forget the bets. You need to be focused on the only thing that matters: staying alive. The odds are already stacked against you considering all the enemies you’ve made in less than two days, so if you don’t have what it takes to survive here, then leave. ”
I blinked. “Leave? Right now?”
“Yes.”
I didn’t say anything for a long moment, trying to digest what he’d said.
On one hand, everything he’d said about me was true.
If I didn’t adopt a cutthroat attitude, I wasn’t going to last much longer.
But on the other hand, this conversation felt way too much like reverse psychology, like he was trying to convince me that leaving was my idea.
Nope. I was not falling for that bull. If he wanted me gone so my impending failure couldn’t tarnish his perfect reputation, then he’d completely forgotten who I was.
Who my family was. We’d already been forced out of the community, already done our time in obscurity.
No way was I leaving here for Thorne’s sake. Especially not for him.
He didn’t want me here? Didn’t want me making him look bad? Tough. I was done feeling guilty for invading his personal space. I deserved to be here, and I wouldn’t let a Hudson bully me into thinking otherwise.
Which was why I raised my chin and firmly replied, “Not a chance in hell.”
Anger practically pulsed from him. Even with my gaze straight ahead, I could see the muscle furiously ticking in his jaw. Oh, well. This wasn’t the first or last time I’d make him angry.
“Fine. It’s your funeral,” he quietly seethed through clenched teeth, making goosebumps erupt over my flesh. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
Okay, I was a bit freaked out now. Or a lot.
When he raised two fingers to his mouth and let an ear-piercing whistle rip through the air, I couldn’t help but flinch.
Immediately, his hawk familiar dropped from the sky and dove like a missile toward us.
He looked like a feathered bullet aimed for my heart, and as he came in hot, it took all of my willpower not to duck behind Thorne for protection.
A split second away from reaching us, the bird thrust out his wings, taloned feet extended. A gust of wind from the flapping wings slapped my face, but I forced my hands to remain at my sides, even when those wicked talons flexed wide, more than capable of gouging my vulnerable eyes out.
Just when I thought a collision was inevitable, Thorne thrust his arm out, and the bird wrapped those deadly taloned feet around it. A tip of one wing struck my cheek before he neatly tucked them both in and climbed up to Thorne’s shoulder.
A bit dazed, I didn’t move a muscle as Thorne whirled and headed back down the stone pathway, not bothering to check if I followed.
With our chat officially over, I stayed where I was even after he was long gone.
I kept my eyes on the distant treeline, his final words ringing in my ears like a death knell.
“It’s your funeral.”
Your funeral.
Funeral.
Funeral.
Funeral.
* * *
Conjuring and Spellwork were my only two classes for the day, but by the time dinner rolled around, I barely had enough energy to snag some food before it was all gone.
At least I’d managed to score some meat this time.
The conversation I’d had with Thorne might have unnerved me, but it had also lit a fire under my butt.
I couldn’t allow myself to waste away from lack of food.
Now that I’d been given a taste of what this school would demand from me on a daily basis, I understood just how important it was to keep my energy up.
These classes weren’t all listening and taking notes.
They were advanced, requiring magical demonstrations more than anything.
It felt like I’d been thrown into the deep end and expected to already know how to swim.
Even though I’d been thoroughly taught all the magical subjects by my parents and Gran over the past decade, this place made me feel like a novice.
What’s worse, none of the other students looked like they were about to fall asleep in their seats from the strenuous day. Annoyed at how low my stamina was, I ate every last scrap of food on my plate, washed it down with a large glass of water, then stood up, ready to call it an early night.
As usual, I’d sat alone in my corner of the dining hall.
Thorne and his friends were across the room at their special table, but if they’d noticed me, I didn’t know.
I was too busy studiously ignoring them.
After what Thorne had said to me, I hoped they kept their distance for as long as possible.
I’d rather not have a mentor at all than deal with constant threats and insults.
I doubted he’d teach me anything useful anyway, not when he so clearly wanted me to leave.
But as I prepared to exit the dining hall, I didn’t fail to notice the heads that turned my way.
Word had spread of my shadewalking demonstration, and reactions were mixed about me not being a complete dud.
Still, not a single soul had approached me all evening.
If I wanted allies, it looked like I’d have to do all the legwork.
Problem was, I still didn’t know who I could trust. If I picked the wrong person, my chances of survival would plummet even more.
For now, I decided that fending for myself was better than letting my guard down around someone who could later stab me in the back. Allies were important, but so was using common sense.
When I approached where Blaze and Alma sat, I felt my muscles tense.
Although I hadn’t meant to, I’d deeply embarrassed them both during our Conjuring demonstrations.
Fewer students had been clamoring for their attention at dinner, especially Alma.
It didn’t help that neither of their mentors had approached them yet, just one more thing the student body had been gossiping about this evening.
Apparently, the only pairing that had met today was me and Thorne.
The other first years were obviously salty about that fact, still grumbling that our pairing was unfair, not to mention obscene.
I’d felt both Alma and Blaze’s eyes on me while I was eating, their ire felt from several feet away.
So as I came even with them, I wasn’t the least bit surprised when I heard Blaze say, “I’m not done with you yet, stray. ”
I could have kept walking. I should have kept walking.
But as I recalled Thorne’s harsh, albeit true words about defending myself, I paused long enough to reply back, “I’m not done with you yet either.”
At the promise, the threat in my tone, a few of the students within hearing range guffawed.
I kept going, half-expecting Blaze to jump up in fury and lob a fireball at my back.
Despite how exposed I felt in that moment, I forced myself to remain calm—at least on the outside.
Without my consent, my gaze flicked to where Thorne sat and caught him watching me.
I couldn’t read his expression, but when our eyes met, I made a point to look away again in a clear snub.
Whispers followed in my wake, but I kept my head high and my gait even, determined to leave this room with dignity.
Today had been utterly exhausting, but I wasn’t going to show it.
By the time I reached Jade Wing, I couldn’t wait to collapse on the rickety bed in my drafty tower.
Even with the constant chill and moaning wind coming from the broken window, I already knew I’d sleep like the dead again.
But when I finally dragged myself up the five flights of stairs and opened the door, something triggered my instincts.
I immediately went on high alert, certain someone was waiting inside the room, ready to attack me.
I thought about running the other way but only for a second.
This was my room, as pathetic as it might be.
Whoever was in it needed to leave, and it was my job to make them, even if that meant defending myself. Even if that meant . . .
Even if that meant hurting them.
Nausea swirled in my gut, but I forced myself to shove open the door and storm inside anyway. In a flash, I conjured a swirling ball of dark violet magic to my fingertips and shouted, “Who’s in here?”
My eyes darted from shadow to shadow, searching for the intruder.
I held the orb higher, my heart pounding out of control.
Nothing happened. The air was cold but still.
Not even a wisp of breeze from the window stirred it.
Slowly turning in a circle, I carefully catalogued everything in the room, and that’s when I finally saw it.
I froze, my insides turning to ice when I read the message on the floor-length mirror.
Leave or die.
The letters were a deep red and still wet, grotesquely bleeding down the reflective glass like . . . like blood. Except that it wasn’t like blood, I realized with rising horror.
It was blood.