CHAPTER 20 #3
No. I wouldn’t. I already knew that. But as he slid his finger out again, only to add a second finger this time, stretching my entrance in a way I’d never felt before, something akin to fear fluttered in my chest.
Won’t be the same, won’t be the same.
His fingers pushed and pushed, stretching me more and more.
My wetness helped, but it still burned, still hurt.
It was a hurt I wanted to feel, though, and that terrified me most of all.
By the time both fingers were all the way inside me, I was a trembling mess.
Sweat had begun to bead my brow and trickle down my spine, and I was leaning more and more heavily on Thorne.
He’d placed his free hand flat on the desk, which brought our bodies even closer together.
My breaths were rapid, but so were his, the intimate moment affecting him as well.
He only waited a moment for me to adjust, then slowly began to thrust those two fingers in and out of me.
Almost immediately, a pleasurable tension started building where his fingers rubbed against my walls, filling me with an ache greater than the one he’d given me this morning.
This ache was fuller, deeper, reaching into parts of me I hadn’t known existed.
Unable to help myself, I arched into him with a low moan, sliding my hands up to twine around his neck. I ached to be closer, closer. “What are you doing to me?”
“Ruining you,” he breathed, curling both fingers until a pitiful whimper left me. “Ruining you like you have ruined me.”
The confession should have alarmed me, but all I felt was more arousal, excitement.
If being ruined felt this good, then I wanted to be ruined.
He added his thumb to the mix, pressing on my clit again while his two middle fingers pumped in and out of me at an ever-increasing pace.
I sank my fingers into the hair at his nape and pulled on the strands.
A guttural sound left him, and he pumped his fingers even faster, feverishly.
At the sound, at the realization that I had caused it, a thrill shot through me.
My aching core tightened. Squeezed. Making me more and more sensitive to his fingers.
It was almost too much. It was too much.
I jerked my legs up and around him, using the leverage to frantically thrust into his fingers.
My entire body was instinct, need, knowing exactly how to find the release it so desperately wanted.
Thorne groaned again, burying his head in the crook of my neck as he drove his fingers in and out of me like a madman.
Swimming, drowning in sensation, I tensed and tensed, so close to reaching my destination.
I didn’t know what finally pushed me over the edge. His pumping fingers, his thumb working my clit, or his mouth hot on my neck. But when I felt him press his groin against the desk edge. Felt it rock, keeping time with my own thrusts. I exploded.
Throwing my head back, I belted out my release, unable to contain the powerful wave of ecstasy blasting through me.
Thorne savagely thrust himself against the desk a few more times, then stiffened all over.
One more thrust, and he groaned into my neck, the sound so raw, so feral, that pure excitement jolted through me, prolonging my orgasm.
Pretty certain that he’d just come in his pants, I felt a wicked sense of satisfaction. Even though I hadn’t touched him, he’d found completion because of me. There was power in that, and it was a heady feeling. Addictive.
When we both finally came down, I was so spent that I could have fallen asleep right then and there.
Thorne slid his fingers out, and I immediately felt less full.
Less whole. I nearly told him to put them back in, but that would have made me sound crazy.
The moment was fading, dying, allowing reality to crowd back in.
Crap. I’d let him pleasure me again. Twice. In one day.
If I wasn’t so utterly exhausted that I could have curled up on this desk and slept forever, I’d be flogging myself.
He helped me down off the desk, allowing me a moment to resituate my clothes before heading to the door. As we left the room, neither of us said a word. What was there to say? Thanks for the mindblowing orgasm, but we can’t do that again?
Already said that. It didn’t stick.
Thorne obviously felt like he had some sort of dibs on my body.
His reaction to Riku’s move on me in the dining hall had said that much.
How I felt about that, I didn’t really know at the moment.
All I knew was that this day needed to come to an end.
Too much had happened for me to wrap my brain around it all. I needed sleep. Sleep.
We reached Jade Wing five minutes later, and I waited for him to turn and leave.
He didn’t. He walked with me all the way down the hall.
Down the crowded hall. Oh, I was definitely feeling heavy walk-of-shame vibes right now.
Everyone stopped and stared, making me think that they could see evidence of what we’d just done written all over my flushed face.
Thorne didn’t even look at them. He walked right on by, his expression unreadable. Like nothing had happened. Like he took girls into dark rooms and pleasured them senseless all the time.
Maybe he did.
Something about that bothered me, really bothered me, and I shut the thought down.
As we reached the end of the hallway, it finally dawned on me that he was making another statement. Him coming here with me was a warning, a threat to anyone who tried to mess with me again. I was pretty sure the message was received loud and clear.
Opening the door that led up to my tower, he let me go through first before following close behind.
Okay, then. He was making sure I safely reached my dorm.
But as I struggled to make it up the stairs, I started to worry that he didn’t plan on leaving at all.
Our conversation earlier today had been about me not staying in his dorm.
We’d said nothing about him staying in mine.
Crap, crap, crap.
I could barely stand when we finally made it to the top. Which was probably why I didn’t think to resist when Thorne asked, “What’s your password?”
“Sesamum, te aperi.”
He quietly scoffed, muttering, “No wonder someone got in. It’s the same as making your password ‘password.’ Make sure to change it.”
“I will.”
As he uttered the spell to unlock my door, he conjured magic to his fingertips before pushing inside. I held my breath, waiting for something terrible to happen.
“Clear,” Thorne said seconds later, coming back out with the blue orb still dancing around his fingers—the fingers that had pleasured me into oblivion twice in one day.
I looked away, making the same mistake I always did by glancing up at his face.
He was watching me, studying, searching.
He opened his mouth to say something, then seemed to change his mind and only said, “Get some sleep. You’ll sit with us at meals from now on, so I expect to see you at our table first thing in the morning. ”
He moved past me to leave, clearly not meaning to stay, and I felt panic beat at my chest.
Stay. Take me with you. Don’t leave me here all alone!
The words tumbled through my mind, but I refused, refused to voice them. Instead, I murmured after him, “They’ll call me a whore.”
He paused. Without turning around, he replied back, “Then they’ll regret it.
” I let the words sink in, let them soothe away some of my worry.
He started to move again, and so did I, already half asleep on my feet.
But only a few stairs down, Thorne paused again and said, “Oh, and, Winter? If Tanaka touches you like that again, I’ll break his fingers. ”
With that, he was gone, leaving me reeling over his sudden possessiveness. Was that what this was? Or was it something even darker?
What are you doing to me?
Ruining you . . .
. . . Ruining you like you have ruined me.