Dating the Dealing Demon (Matchmaker Monster Romance #4)

Chapter One

CHAPTER ONE

Theo

T hink you come from a dysfunctional family?

Try growing up in a family of actual demons.

Smoke fills the air in curls and twists—not the volcanic vapors from the inferno dimensions. No, this is infinitely worse. It’s family poker night, mandated by my father’s summons.

No magic is allowed. Cheating is encouraged. Otherwise, the same rules hold here as in the human dimension. In fact, we all wear human glamours to the game since wings, horns, and tails make for a horribly tight fit around the table. Not to mention claws can be a real bitch on breakables such as the glasses for the alcohol necessary to make it through the evening without maiming each other.

Luckily, we’re at last down to me, my parents, and my two sisters after having gotten rid of the cowards and the sycophants…all except my cousin, Dupree. That weaseling little asshole remains.

Not bothering to check the cards in my hand again, I drop chips onto the jackpot and nudge my baby sister, Nic—short for Nicolette—to play rather than watch the human reality show on her phone. A few decades shy of a century, she’s the equivalent of an immortal teenager.

“Huh?” she asks, glancing around the table.

“Call, raise, or fold,” my father commands around his cigar as though he’s issuing orders at the royal court instead of presiding over game night. “Keep your head in the game, baby girl.”

“Oh.” She tosses chips toward the center, not seeming to notice when some roll my way.

I sweep the runaway chips into the jackpot. “If I have to pretend to pay attention, Nic, so do you,” I whisper. “What are you watching anyway?”

“Not what. Who.” She shoots a sly smirk my way. “Your future mate.”

My scowl would scare off a lesser demon, but not either of my little sisters. “The first thing I’ll do is force her to give up that stupid reality show.”

“Yeah, because women love to be told what to do.”

“She’ll adjust. Every royal mate eventually does. Besides, we’re fated. Val Bonetti assimilating into the demon court is meant to be.”

She snorts. “Good luck with that, Prince of Darkness. Her family makes ours look normal.”

I disagree. “You know their great-great-whatever-grandma made a deal with our mom a few centuries ago, right? They wouldn’t have become famous without our family’s magic.”

“Geez, Theo. Definitely don’t lead with that when you woo her.”

“Woo?” I scoff. “There will be no wooing. Royal alliances are business arrangements. Not romantic nonsense.”

Her gaze widens. “Wow,” she drawls. “Do your clients know their matchmaker has no heart?”

“As long as I find them the sure way to score the absolute best magical match, they don’t care. Besides, feelings muddle the process. My pragmatism makes me the best.”

“Charming.” Sarcasm drips from her tone. “No wonder you haven’t had a long-term relationship.” Ignoring me, she goes back to watching her show.

I risk her having more ammo to use in teasing when I ask, “What’s she like?”

Nic frowns, not looking up from the screen. “Who?”

I bite back my you know who response and only answer after she continues to remain silent. “Val.”

“How would I know?”

“Aren’t you the president of their little fan club here in the hell dimensions?” A fan club I hadn’t known existed until I told Nic of my fated mate’s identity. My sister had practically squealed with excitement.

“Little? We are three hundred members strong.” She huffs out a breath. “Val is a middle sibling. Popular with men but not with women—the show’s target demographic—so she doesn’t have the same rabid following as her whip-smart older sister who’s destined to take over their international beauty corporation or their glamourous youngest twin siblings. Although I would argue Val could compete with the twins’ good looks. She’s got their level of pretty or better, but sharper.”

“What do you mean?”

“The twins’ otherworldly look is almost fae or angelic, but with Val, there’s something wilder, a bit more feral about her. I figure it’s why she doesn’t get the same big sponsorship deals the twins do.” Nic hands me her phone. “See?”

Fuck . I should’ve bothered to open the investigative portfolio I ordered up on my future mate.

The woman’s a seductress from her sly gaze as it sweeps the others on set to the curves filling out her body-hugging dress that looks one tug away from an X-rated wardrobe malfunction. Please, let there be a wardrobe malfunction.

Nic takes back the phone, and I fight the instinct to yank it from her. “Anything else?” I ask, hating my voice for going gruff.

“She’s not as successful as her older sister, and she’s not nearly as talkative as either of the twins. If there’s a prop disaster or a miscommunication skit, she’s in the middle of it. The showrunners tried portraying her as a serious student and scientist intent on working in the family’s beauty company, but the press slammed it as an unbelievable gimmick. She’s got a weird obsession with neatness, but her life seems to mostly be a mess. It’s a total contradiction. Most fans complain she’s nothing more than a pretty face and occasional comedic relief. Sorry, Theo.”

“Don’t be.” I have enough to deal with as our father’s chief advisor and occasional enforcer. The last thing I need is a difficult bride. I can deal with one who likes things tidy. Hell, I value rules and order more than most since the hell dimensions stay one step away from a civil war.

My mother draws everyone’s attention when she loudly taps her cards against the table, then tosses them as if they disgust her. “Oh dear,” she says on a dramatic sigh. “It seems I’m out.” She stands, leaving her cards face down on the table. “How disappointing that I can’t stay with you all longer.” She sounds anything but disappointed.

“You could stay to keep us company,” my father suggests. “To bring me luck.”

“I would, but I have a contract to close, riches to collect for the royal coffers, and powers to gain. Theodopolis,” she calls with a narrowed stare my way. “Don’t forget what we talked about earlier.”

“I won’t.” Though I wish I could. My mother doesn’t want me matching with Val Bonetti.

Anyone but a Bonetti had been her exact words this afternoon when she’d crashed my interrogation of a troll about unsanctioned portal activity. I’m trying to protect the realms, and my mother is worried about renegotiating a centuries-old contract with a human family.

I wouldn’t have even known who Val Bonetti was if it hadn’t been for Mother’s meddling. When I’d told her that the middle Bonetti daughter was my destined mate, she said I must’ve read the signs wrong. Me—who has hundreds of successful matches to prove that I’m the best at what I do. Even better than Mother, and she’d been the world’s premier matchmaker before I got into the business.

I didn’t read the signs wrong, and I’m not refusing a fated mate. Certainly not so Mother can enjoy watching the Bonetti family suffer.

No, I’ll match with Val Bonetti.

Not for something so pointless as pleasure—or hellfire forbid—love.

Completing the bond with my fated mate is my only chance at leveling up my magic enough to lock down my claim to my father’s throne. It doesn’t matter that I’m the firstborn son. The noble families won’t follow a leader who can’t keep the hell dimensions in line. If Val Bonetti is the one woman who can give me that, I’ll match with her for what matters most in life—power.

Still watching me as if she’s assessing what I plan to do about the Bonettis, my mother teleports away.

From the seat next to the one she left vacant, my snake of a cousin flips her cards upright. I’m surprised Dupree hadn’t already cheated to know what she held. “Three sevens,” he mumbles. “She just wanted to leave the table.”

“Don’t we all,” Nic says sweetly.

“What’s that?” my father asks.

“Nothing, Daddy.”

Dupree’s turn is up next. “Care to up the bet this round, Uncle?” he asks my father. “Toss your crown into the jackpot and see?—?”

My other sister cuts him off. “Pardon the cliché, but hell really would have to freeze over before you had a chance at becoming king, Dupree.” Gilly—short for Gillayonda—shoots him a scathing glare. “Pony up your final chips, loser. Should’ve known you wouldn’t last in a game that requires any modicum of skill.”

“As opposed to luck?” Dupree says with a sneer that almost hides the shake in his hand when he pushes his few remaining chips into the pot. Almost. He’ll be out soon—forced out of our inner circle like always. “At least I have luck, Gilly darling,” he says in a too-smooth voice that contradicts his personality’s hard edges. “Unlike you who showed up to the party a year too late to inherit the throne.” He eyes me, the heir to my father’s crown.

I want to rip the pretty boy glamour off his true self, but it would do no good except to bring me joy for the brief moment it took my father to intervene on the little snake’s behalf.

“Don’t talk to me about luck.” Gilly curls her lip and gives Dupree a once-over to suggest she wouldn’t stop at peeling his glamour away. She might tear his actual skin off. This from my calm, calculating sister. “I’m still second in line above your…what is it? Eighth? Tenth?”

Their hatred of each other goes beyond rivalry. I don’t know what our cousin did to so thoroughly piss Gilly off. She gets along with everyone else. Not as well as Nic does, but no one is as beloved as Nic.

Gilly studies her cards carefully before making her play. “Your turn,” she tells our father.

He stares at her like he has no clue what she’s talking about.

Or even who his beloved daughter is.

His eyes blaze scarlet, and his human glamour shifts out of place to reveal hints of the horns beneath.

My heart pounds, the pulse echoing in my veins and dropping to pool in my gut. Dread courses through my blood.

This isn’t the first time my father has lost track of his surroundings. It happened yesterday while he welcomed a foreign dignitary to the royal court and he almost roasted a noble over a pit of hellfire before I intervened.

I brace, ready to jump in again. Interfering with anything a king does is tricky business. Taking the brunt of my father’s temper as his son is no less dangerous. Only my mother can soothe him, and she’s not here. But I won’t let him hurt Gilly or Nic. If Dupree gets caught in the crossfire, oh well.

Father drops his human glamour, snapping out his wings and knocking over chairs. A rush of flame comes from his hands, incinerating the cards he holds and rushing over the table. Glasses of whiskey explode, sending shattered shards flying and firing a blaze upward to crawl along the ceiling.

Both my sisters scramble away from the table with Dupree not far behind.

I let my glamour roll away, missing the tailored elegance of the human form as my demon self emerges from beneath, massive and monstrous. “Father! Stop.”

My shout seems to shake him from whatever stupor took over. Rage replaces his confusion.

Roaring, he tosses the table into the far wall where it splinters with a crack. At least most of the flames extinguish.

“This game’s over,” he declares on a growl and storms from the room.

Silence surrounds us, interrupted only by the occasional crackle of a spark left burning. The others tense the same as I do—probably waiting to see if he returns and finishes the tantrum he abandoned.

Gilly recovers first, straightening her blouse and tucking her hair behind her ear. “That’s one way to fold,” she says.

“I need another drink.” Dupree helps himself to the entire bottle of an expensive single malt.

Nic touches my arm. “You’re our best chance at keeping everything together.” She glances back at her phone where the reality show still plays.

The camera zooms in on Val Bonetti with her long lashes and piercing blue gaze that seems to reach through the screen to me. My fated mate, my one shot at unlocking magic powerful enough to hold the hell dimensions together, my deserved repayment for the powers my family bestowed on hers.

“I’ll fix this,” I promise my sister. “I’ll get the Bonetti woman to submit.”

“But the mating magic isn’t guaranteed unless she gives full consent to the two of you being destined for one another. Unless she loves you.”

“Love doesn’t matter. Not with a kingdom at stake.”

“Love’s all that matters,” my tender-hearted sister says. “And maybe a little bit of luck.”

She’s wrong. Only the crown matters. But I won’t waste my time debating priorities when I have more important things to do—interdimensional portals to protect, monsters to match, my father to keep from wrecking our world.

Val Bonetti is a means to end. Besides, her family owes mine for everything they have. I’m simply collecting the debt.