48. Zoe
Zoe
Something in the air at the academy has the hair on the back of my neck standing on end. I've tried to ask Ilota about it, but she's quiet. I know that her ability to talk to me is predicated on people believing her, but is my belief not enough?
Viv feels it, too.
"Something weird is going on, right?" she asks as we grab coffees from the third floor of the Hub. "It feels like there is a secret we're not in on."
I sip my latte and join her in one of the window nooks. "I feel the exact same thing. I've tried asking… my mother what is going on, but she's been silent."
Viv picks up on my coded words with no issue. "It makes me want to lock myself in my room until it passes. Like if I'm behind a door, I won't be a part of whatever is to come."
I wish I could see Cameron right now. We both agreed it's better that I not be seen going to the chapel all the time, since I'm not known to be devout. We don't think people finding out the Hierophant is giving special attention to a Beta student would go over well.
"Okay, let's talk about something else." Viv angles her body closer to mine, our knees bumping. She looks as gorgeous as always, but there is a glint to her eye that promises I'm not going to like what she has to say. "Like my brother."
My stomach drops.
"What about him?" Can she see that I'm hiding something? I don't want to keep secrets from her, but how do I explain to my best friend that her brother is fated to me? I don't want to come between them, and I don't want him to come between us.
It feels like there is no winning.
"On Saturday, he had something very interesting to share with me. I've been waiting for you to bring it up to me."
Shit, did he tell her? He must've. What else could she be talking about?
"Well, uh…" I trail off, unsure of what to say. "I can explain?"
She laughs, grabbing and squeezing my knee affectionately. "You don't have to explain. He told me you didn't know, and then you were quite busy." She waggles her eyebrows. "I want the details about that, by the way."
A knot I wasn't aware of loosens in my chest. Viv knows I'm scent-matched to her brother, and she's not mad at me? She still wants to be my friend?
"I don't want to be his match." My voice is barely above a whisper because I don't want anyone to overhear us. "He's known for a while. That's why he was so nice to me."
Though her smile is sympathetic, Viv's tone is placating. "I know that he did, and it was shitty of him to do, but my brother is a good guy, Zoe. He's a stupid boy, yes, but I don't think it was malicious."
I don't want to pick a fight with Viv by arguing over this. She's going to see the best in Ray. He's her brother. They love one another. I don't expect her to hold loyalty to me over him.
But I need to stick up for my self.
"It may not have been malicious, but he kept something major from me and used it to get closer to me.
If I had found out at the same time he did, maybe I could have forgiven him eventually, but he manipulated me.
" I run my fingers through my hair and sigh.
"I know he's your brother, Viv. And I know that Oren picked him for me for a reason.
I'm going to need him. But I don't know if I'll bond him. "
She winces. "I know. And it's not fair of me to ask this of you, but as my friend, could you please try to forgive him? I love you, Zoe. You're the best friend I've ever had. Except for Ray. I can't let you think that's who he is."
"I love you too, Viv. I have been so focused on all my shit that I haven't been a very good friend to you."
"Stop, don't worry about it. You've had a lot going on."
"Yeah, I have, but it's not a good excuse." I lean my head back against the wall and close my eyes. "I don't think Ray is a bad guy. But I don't think he would've ever come around to me if we weren't scent matches, so it's hard to believe that anything between us could be genuine."
"I get it. And I would probably be team 'fuck him but not literally' if it were anyone but Ray."
I don't blame Viv for being on Ray's side in this situation. I also don't think she means any harm by it, and she wouldn't be encouraging me to forgive just anyone. I'm sure if I tried to forgive Dominic for being such an asshole, she'd give me an earful.
"I can't believe the Archon is doing this.
" The words yank my attention from thoughts of Ray, and I peer over Viv's shoulder at the Alpha woman sitting with a friend on the couch.
"All of the high priests will be here today to do another ceremony.
It's in like half an hour. They're making all of the Betas touch the stones again. "
Time stands still.
They can't do that, can they?
The Alpha's friend voices my thoughts, and she scoffs. "Of course they can. The Arcanist and the high priests approved it."
Viv and I lock eyes, and I can practically see the fear rolling off of her. "It's a rumor."
"I don't think so. We both felt something weird. I think we found it."
She's on her feet, grabbing my hand and dragging me out of the Hub. My coffee, forgotten and cold, splashes out of my hand and onto my shirt. "We have to find Cameron. He'll know what's going on."
Once we're out of the Hub, we can see a crowd gathering around the chapel.
"Fuck, we're not getting in there." I change our direction, and now Viv is the one trailing behind. "Let's find Cliff. He'll know what to do."
We're running against the crowd, like salmon swimming upstream, as we try to find Cliff in the chaos as everyone leaves their classes and makes their way to the chapel.
"Ilota, a little help here. They're going to make me touch the stones again."
She doesn't answer.
What the fuck am I supposed to do? Will I be able to keep my dragon under wraps? I'm not that confident I can. It's a wager where the stakes are my life.
We nearly crash into Cliff, who looks just as harried as I feel. He grabs me by the cheeks and starts peppering me with kisses, like he was worried he'd never see me again.
"What are we going to do?" Viv asks. Her back is to us, as we're shoved against a wall, protecting us from the crowds jostling around. "We can't let her do this."
"I can hide. What are they going to do if they call my name and I'm not there?"
"They'll wait for you." My Beta clutches my cheeks. "I think they know about you."
I hadn't allowed myself to think about that possibility, but I know he's right. Someone knows something, and that's why they're here.
Did Warren tell someone?
Am I going to die because I denied the advances of the boy I grew up with?
I can feel the panic starting to crawl up my throat, and my breathing grows labored.
"I'm not ready to die," I whimper. "I just got you.
Things are shit with Ray, but they could get better.
I haven't bonded with Cameron. I've never met his beast." Fearful tears are falling down my cheeks, and I don't bother trying to wipe them away.
They'll be replaced immediately. "And Dominic.
He's the fucking worst. But I still had some hope, that maybe—"
"Zoe!" My name, shouted across the hall, cuts me off. I look up and see Dominic running toward me. He skids to a stop in front of me, chest heaving, eyes wild. "Zoe. We have to bond. Right now."