Chapter 1 #2
“I couldn’t sleep,” I admitted, taking a sip of the honey-sweetened tea.
Ama tilted her head sympathetically at me, her thick hair slipping off her shoulder.
My own thick hair was tied back in a long braid.
Everyone said we looked so much alike. That the blood passed down from First Daughter to First Daughter for generations was strong.
We had the same golden-brown skin, deepened by the hot plains sun; high cheekbones; full lips.
The same large eyes framed by dark lashes, though my eye color was a much lighter amber, where hers was a rich chocolate.
I may have looked like her on the outside, but I had none of the power given to her by the Earth Mother.
At her full strength, she had been able to heal someone on the brink of death, from the inside out.
She could even use her abilities offensively, by causing a wave of agony over a small battalion of soldiers, enough to cripple them.
But I couldn’t even heal a scratch.
“I will admit that your power is taking longer to manifest than is common in our family,” Ama said, reaching over to touch my hand, “but earth magic has always been strong in the Sorayan line. It will come. We just need to tap into it.”
I glanced down at my cup with a frown. Ama believed that anything was possible if you just tried hard enough. And maybe she was right. Maybe I didn’t put enough effort into it.
Nonsense, Shazeera said sharply. You tried so hard to connect to your abilities last time that your nose bled with the effort.
Yes, but I didn’t pass out, so clearly I wasn’t trying hard enough, I thought back with a heavy dose of sarcasm.
Shazeera snorted beside me.
“Let’s begin,” Ama said, and with an inward sigh, I angled my body to face her.
The horsehair mantle she wore brushed against my arms as she placed her hands on mine.
It was as black as Nafalla’s mane and tail, as it had been taken from them over the years, and dark as Ama’s own hair where it wasn’t streaked with silver.
My own mantle, formed from the black hairs of Shazeera’s mane and tail, was much smaller, as I hadn’t had as many years to add to it.
“Instead of trying again to sense the protective wards, let’s try to access the healing side of your magic. ”
I shot her a confused glance. “Aren’t the wards the most important?”
“Yes, but sometimes trying a different approach can help refresh your senses.”
I nodded and tried not to argue, even though we had tried this months ago and it hadn’t helped. Nothing did.
“The pulse points are where you can connect with the rivers and streams of blood within someone, following it to its source. The blood will always reveal what needs to be mended, whether it is sickness or injury. Now find my pulse with your fingertips.”
I did as she asked. This part was easy. Anyone could feel a heartbeat in a pulse. Her wrists were warm, her heartbeat steady, as I pressed down gently with both hands.
“Close your eyes and go into the part of you that’s connected to Shazeera.”
In my mind, I reached for our bond, that gleaming chain of light that was unbreakable.
I could sense Shazeera’s emotions—hopeful and anxious that I would finally succeed.
If I went deeper, I could even sense what she physically felt.
Right now, the scent of the sage filled her nostrils, the smell so much more complex than I detected.
Beneath the typically herbal scent were notes of rich loam and spicy peppercorn.
“Are you there?”
“Yes,” I murmured, keeping my eyes closed tightly in concentration.
“I want you to reach into yourself where that same power comes from and reach for my pulse point instead.”
But when I reached for my mother’s life force, the one I should have been able to sense if I had healing abilities like her, there was only darkness.
“There’s nothing there,” I told her, barely able to keep the frustration from my voice.
“All you can do is try again,” she said gently. “Our life force shines as brightly as the sun. With your inner eye, you should be able to detect the light radiating from my bloodstream. You must reach out with the part of you that’s connected to the Earth Mother.”
Determination filled me. I wouldn’t fail this time.
I reached deep inside myself, searching for the light, and the farther I went, the more the pavilion with all its familiar scents and sounds disappeared.
Even Shazeera seemed far away. My head pounded along with my heartbeat.
This was usually the point where I pushed too hard and ended up with a nosebleed.
But I had to keep going. I couldn’t bear to let Ama down again, to see that look of disappointment on her face.
I pushed past the pressure in my head and waded through the darkness in my mind, searching for any hint of magic.
Soon, I went so far I couldn’t sense Shazeera at all. It was like suddenly not being able to feel my legs anymore. Fear grabbed hold of my chest, making it hard to breathe. Why couldn’t I sense Shazeera?
But before I could return to the surface of my mind, the darkness cleared.
I stood on top of a cliff overlooking a dark ocean, waves crashing against the rock.
Above, the clouds raced across the sky as a powerful wind howled.
The primal scene made my pulse jump. Wind danced over the water until it swirled around me, lifting my hair and whispering in my ear.
In all the years I had tried to reach for the earth magic Ama promised lay dormant within me, this had never happened.
I only ever stumbled around in the darkness of my mind, powerless.
Ever since I was little, though, I had sensed a presence in the wind, just like Ama spoke of earth magic being present in every living thing.
But I had never been able to reach inside myself and make a connection with it.
I stood frozen, unsure how to react. The whispers grew louder…
I could almost make out what it was saying.
But then a voice called out to me, pulling me back to reality.
“Zara,” Ama said, her eyes wide, “did you sense it? Could you see my life force?”
“I saw a powerful wind,” I answered without thinking, still a little dazed from the scene. My head pounded with a splitting headache at the effort of going so deep within my own mind, but at least I didn’t have a nosebleed this time. “I think it was calling me.”
She dropped her hands from mine with a frown. “Tell me what you saw.”
I described the stormy scene, but my words didn’t seem to adequately express the depth of the power I had sensed. “It seemed like a force that could make a difference in this war.”
Ama looked unimpressed. “I thought we went over this years ago. You are a First Daughter born from a First Daughter, going back generations. The power of the Earth Mother flows strongly through our veins, and it is the source of every ability I have that keeps our people safe. There may be lesser abilities in our lineage, but it is the healing and warding skills that are most needed.”
“I’ve tried—”
“Our people are dying, Zara,” Ama interrupted.
“We’ve lost over sixty percent of our population, and if it keeps going like this, our entire culture will be wiped out.
Years ago, I could keep nearly the entire grasslands covered by my wards,” she said, sweeping her hand toward the map of Equnox hanging against one wall, “hiding us from the Eagle Riders. Now, I can barely shield our camp. So when you say you’ve tried—you haven’t if you’re wasting time trying to connect with lesser magic and ignoring the defensive abilities given to us by the Earth Mother herself. ”
“You’re not listening to me, Ama,” I said, frustration gripping me so hard my eyes welled with tears. “There is no other magic within me! I’ve spent years searching for it, and this is the first time I’ve found anything at all. Only the wind.”
Ama’s eyes flashed. “It’s there! You’re my daughter, so of course you have the ability. Your people need you, Zara, and you’re letting them all down.”
I winced like she’d physically slapped me, and Shazeera stamped her hoof and tossed her mane with an indignant snort.
She may be the queen and your mother, but she’s taking it too far, Shazeera said, anger darkening her tone.
Nafalla must have heard Shazeera’s words and passed them on to Ama, because my mother whipped her head around at Shazeera.
“You should be using your bond as a tool to help her harness her earth magic, not indulging her in chasing after whispers of a lesser ability that will only end up costing lives.”
You don’t know that, Shazeera argued. What if this magic is more powerful?
Ama stilled. “I’m only going to say this once. To both of you. This magic is dangerous and better left alone. Or have you forgotten who it is that our enemy worships?”
The Zephyrians were called such because they worshipped the god of wind, Zephyr.
As far as I knew, none of them could call on the power of the wind, but that didn’t make me feel much better.
The fact that I had tapped into a power associated with Zephyr, and therefore the Zephyrians, caused a prickle of unease to race over my skin.
“There is no magic besides our own,” I said, because it was known that the Earth Mother bestowed powers only upon her Children.
“It wasn’t always this way,” Ama said. “The world was full of different types of magic once, and some of those magic lines still exist.”
My eyes widened. “What do you—”
But before I could finish my question, Nasrin, one of my mother’s handmaidens, rushed into the main area of the pavilion. “My queen,” she said breathlessly, “a warrior and her mare were attacked by an Eagle Rider. She’s dying.”
I knew then that my question would go unanswered for now because Ama would never turn anyone away who needed healing. She came gracefully to her feet and gestured for me to do the same. We hurried after Nasrin, horses at our sides.