Chapter 28
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Emilie
Shit.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
“Cyrus,” Ladon said, his voice much steadier than I felt. “I was—”
“Don’t lie to me,” Cyrus interrupted. “I can see it in your face. You're more transparent than you think. You forget that I’ve known you all your life. It’s the same face you make when you’re strategizing your next battle plan. What is it, brother? Tell me the truth.”
Jade stood up and deserted her plate and glass of ale. She looked terrified, and I couldn’t blame her. I’d never seen Cyrus so upset. “I think I should go.”
Unfortunately, things were about to get much worse.
“Cyrus, please calm down,” I tried, but he put a hand up to stop me.
“Please understand that I didn’t ask for this,” Ladon said, his voice rough. “How could I have known this would happen? We were kidnapped, and Emilie was all I had. And she… she became all I needed.”
Cyrus pinched his eyes closed, and I felt the first tear stream down my face. “I don’t want to hear this.”
My hand reached for Ladon’s, and Cyrus’s eyes opened just in time to catch the movement. He glared at our combined hands and then his eyes locked with mine. “You said you needed time. That you weren’t in the right headspace for a relationship.”
I bit my tongue because there was nothing else I could do.
“Please don’t take your anger out on her,” Ladon said.
I jumped when Cyrus shouted, “I have enough anger for both of you!”
Ladon hopped out of his seat and stood with his chest inches from Cyrus’s. “Do not speak to her that way.”
I scrambled to my feet and wrapped a hand around his arm, attempting to pull him back, but he was fixed to the ground like a statue. “Ladon, please.”
“At what point did you decide to take my wife?” Cyrus demanded. “Tell me when you decided to betray your family.”
Ladon shook his head, and I could feel the anger and hurt radiating from him. Ladon adored his family and would do anything to protect them, including threatening me once upon a time. Back when he thought I was a harlot and a leech. He would never betray his family.
“Cyrus, stop,” I yelled, but his gaze remained fixed on Ladon.
“I didn’t take anything,” Ladon snapped. “And she was never your wife.”
“Oh, so that makes it okay? Since we didn’t make it to our wedding day, it’s okay for you to ruin a royal engagement and our kingdom’s alliance with Dreslen?”
“No.” His voice turned hard. “None of this is okay. Spending months in captivity wasn’t okay. Being forced to rape her wasn’t okay.”
I flinched, but neither brother paid me any attention.
“Watching her get assaulted and brutalized wasn’t okay. None of it was okay. You don’t know half of what we went through, and if you did, you wouldn’t be demanding explanations right now.”
Cyrus stammered, searching for words but coming up empty.
Ladon’s voice was softer when he said, “I love her. I love her with everything in me, and I won’t apologize for it.”
Silence stifled the room, and my heart thundered in my chest. It felt like it was on the verge of exploding. My whole body trembled while I waited for either of them to say something. I was terrified of what would come next.
Cyrus’s jaw clenched, and he straightened his jacket.
“When we return to Renoa, I want you to collect your things and leave. You can stay at Fort Malek. I know how much you love it there. I never want to see your face in my castle again. Emilie, you’re free to follow him or return to Dreslen. I don’t really care what you do.”
He walked away, taking all the oxygen in the room with him.
Ladon fell back a few steps, and I hugged him, whispering, “He didn’t mean it. He’s upset and needs some time to cool down. Your family means everything to you, and he knows that.”
Ladon shook his head. “I’ve never seen him like that.”
This wasn’t fair. Cyrus had no right to treat Ladon this way.
He hadn’t even known me when we were betrothed; it was an arranged marriage that my parents had brokered.
I meant nothing to him. Couldn’t he see that I meant everything to Ladon?
I hated that his loyalty was being questioned when he was the most devoted person I knew.
I let go of Ladon, and he sat back down on the bench seat. He stared down at his hands, his bangs shielding his eyes from me. He looked so broken. It reminded me of the first time I’d found him in the shower after Reyna had assaulted him.
That thought stiffened my spine.
No. I wouldn’t let the conversation end like this.
I gritted my teeth and stormed after Cyrus.
“Hey,” I shouted once I found him on the bow of the ship. He didn’t turn to face me, and that only pissed me off more. “What is wrong with you?”
I gained the attention of a few crew hands, but they quickly turned away, focusing on their work as if realizing this was a confrontation they didn’t want to get involved in.
Cyrus hung his head, but he didn’t say a word.
“You’re a coward,” I said. “And you’re being selfish.
Your brother loves you, and you have no idea how hard this has been for him.
You’ll never understand what we went through.
What it means to be completely broken, the pieces of your shattered heart and soul lying on the ground.
Ladon knows that feeling. I know it too.
And the fucked-up part is that all our pieces are scrambled together now.
Neither of us can live without the other. ”
Cyrus’s knuckles turned white on the rail, and I wondered if I’d struck a nerve or if he was simply tuning me out.
“How dare you stand there and act as though you have some claim on me? And to turn on him when he needs you, after everything he has done for you. He would give up his life for yours, but you can’t grant him this one happiness?”
Cyrus refused to face me.
I sighed. “I thought you were a better man than this, Cyrus.”
Accepting that he wasn’t ready to admit he was wrong, I turned around and headed back to the kitchen space, except Ladon wasn’t there anymore. He must’ve headed back to the bunk room. He hadn’t finished his sandwich or his ale.
I grabbed our food and retraced our steps from before until I found the narrow hall that connected our rooms. The ship was swaying now, and I ricocheted from side to side.
Up ahead, Jade stumbled out of our room with her bag in her hands.
She caught sight of me and said, “I offered to switch bunks with Ladon. Figured the last thing either of them wanted was to be locked in a tiny room together for the next five nights. I’d prefer if we all made it to Wyland in one piece. ”
She forced the world’s most unnatural smile, but I appreciated the effort. I doubted Cyrus would be thrilled to find Ladon sleeping in my room, but given the options, this seemed to be the best arrangement.
“You’re probably right. Thank you.”
Her smile faded. “I really am sorry. I know I haven’t been the best travel companion, but I didn’t mean to cause all this chaos. We may not be friends, but we are supposed to be allies, and I haven’t been acting like one.”
I blinked in surprise. “It’s okay. It wasn’t your fault. This has been coming for a while now. I’m only sorry it happened on a boat where none of us can escape.”
We shared a soft laugh before the air grew thick with discomfort again. I reached for the door to my room and hesitated for a second before adding, “Have a good night, Jade.”
“You too,” she replied, and disappeared into the room next to mine.
I eased the door open. “Ladon?”
He sighed, rolling onto his side on the bottom bunk. Grief was apparent in every facet of his face, from his dark eyes to the slight pout on his lips.
“Well, that could’ve gone better,” I said, attempting to ease some of the tension.
He scooted over, making room for me to join him in bed.
“I brought the rest of your sandwich.” Wrapped in a napkin, I handed the half-eaten food to him.
Ladon groaned and sat up, resting his back against the wall. He bent his knees, his forearms lying across them while he stared at the sandwich. “I’m not hungry.”
“I know,” I said, sliding across the small bed to mimic his seated position. I nuzzled against his shoulder, inhaling the scent of salt water and baked bread. “But you should still eat.”
He forced himself to take a bite, and a disgusted expression crossed his face.
“You look like a child who is being forced to eat their vegetables.”
“I’m not a fan of turkey.”
I held back a laugh. “Switch me. Mine is chicken.”
We traded and finished our meals in heavy silence. Now that the adrenaline had worn off, I was feeling the impact harder than when it had happened. And I was pretty sure Ladon was too. He was unusually quiet.
“Ladon.”
“Hmm?”
“Tell me something honest.”
He turned to face me, his eyes sparkling like precious silver. “I’m content. I’m at peace.”
I tilted my head. That seemed impossible right now.
As if he could read my mind, he continued, “Don’t get me wrong—this is awful.
I don’t know what’s going to happen… if Cyrus will forgive me or I really will be banned from my home.
I like Fort Malek, but I don’t want to be exiled and separated from my family.
I couldn’t have imagined a worse way for things to play out. ”
He reached up and brushed a loose strand of hair behind my ear. “But I truly feel content. You’re here, right next to me in this bed, and we don’t have to hide it anymore. I can touch you.”
He set his sandwich on the small nightstand protruding from the wall and took mine too, placing it next to his.
“I can kiss you.”
He grabbed my waist and pulled me into his lap, running his hands over my sides before finding the hem of my shirt.
I lifted my arms, and he pulled it off, tossing it to the side.
I inhaled sharply when his lips gently caressed the place between my breasts.
My fingers tangled in his hair, and I ran a finger down his spine.
He grabbed my ass and pressed my body into his, making me melt against him.
“I can have you.”