Chapter 9
Esme
Curled up in Vesper's lap, my back pressed against his chest, Milo feeds me bites of a turkey club sandwich.
Strangely, it was the one thing I wanted the moment we got home.
It's such a normal thing, too, sitting here eating a sandwich like I'm not technically dead, like my entire world hasn't been turned upside down in the span of a week.
But I wanted something normal, something that didn't involve existential crises or conversations about transition states or my sister killing me.
I hum as Milo brings another bite to my lips, the flavors exploding on my tongue.
Turkey, bacon, lettuce, tomato, and some kind of roasted tomato dressing, all of it perfectly balanced and delicious.
I chew slowly, savoring every last bit as Milo grins at me like I've just given him the greatest compliment in the world.
"Good?" he asks, his green eyes sparkling.
"So good," I say, swallowing. "You make the best sandwiches." My mind wanders, wondering what kind of demon he is, what he would like, and how much fun it would be to play with his tail. The moment my scent sweetens, though. I clear my throat and throw him a timid smile, the Beta’s nostrils flaring for a second before he just moves on like I wasn’t thinking about him fucking me.
Milo preens, his chest puffing out just a little. "I know."
Vesper's arms tighten around my waist, his chin resting on my shoulder as Milo continues to feed me. They didn’t really do this before, although Vesper loved holding me and I found his lap one of the best places in the world.
Maybe it’s my newly awoken Omega instincts but I like being taken care of, held, touched.
Even the brief touches Duske was giving me all afternoon have me on cloud 9.
I twist around to find Duske who’s sitting across the table, his sandwich untouched. His dark eyes are locked on my face, his expression unreadable, my cheeks heating under the weight of his stare. My scent blooms in response, his jaw tightening as he shifts backward a little.
The room gets a little darker, the shadows in the corners thickening and stretching toward us like they're alive.
The temperature drops, just slightly, but enough that a shiver runs down my spine.
Duske curses under his breath, his hands clenching into fists on the table, and then he abruptly stands up, the chair scraping against the floor.
"I need a minute," he mutters and then he heads upstairs.
I frown, watching him go, completely confused on what just happened.
"What's wrong with him?" The room returns to normal, the afternoon sunlight spilling through the windows again, like Duske took the darkness with him.
Milo just looks lost, his gaze darting between me and the stairs.
Vesper doesn't say anything, his arms still wrapped around me, and I twist in his lap to look at him. "What's going on?"
Vesper's eyes meet mine, something cautious in his expression. "Give him a minute, princess."
I shake my head, pulling away from him. "No. Something's wrong, and I want to know what it is."
I start to stand, ready to march upstairs and confront Duske, but Vesper catches my hand, pulling me back to his side. "Hey, give him a minute."
I turn to face him, searching for answers in Vesper’s expression but finding none. I can usually read him better but in this moment, he’s guarded, just leaving me more confused. "What's wrong?"
Vesper's gaze softens as he tugs me back down into his lap. "I know you felt the air get a little colder, and I'm sure you saw how everything darkened a bit just now, right?"
I nod slowly, my mind racing. "So? You're demons. I know that."
Milo lets out a surprised laugh. "I really thought there would be more of a freakout."
I sigh, leaning back against Vesper's chest. "I did have a freakout.
Remember? The first time Liora told me you guys were exorcists, I called bullshit and dragged the truth out of Vesper before clarifying it with Duske.
I thought I was going crazy, didn't talk to you guys for like three days. You thought I was broken."
Milo snorts, shaking his head. "I thought you were. Most people scream or try to tell everyone. You just shut us out."
I meet his gaze, loving the bit of shyness lingering in his eyes.
Milo thought I didn’t want to be friends with them anymore.
I just thought fate was playing a cruel joke on me.
I was already a defective Omega but then Death was going to be my friend?
Bullshit. "Because what you are didn't change that I liked you guys.
A lot. And you weren't hurting me. So now that I'm dead but somehow still here, and there are tails and darkness and one of my mates is Death?
Yeah, I'm not really freaking out about the room getting a little colder and the shadows moving. "
Milo frowns, his expression shifting to something more serious. "You can see that? You shouldn't be able to see that."
I shrug, my gaze shifting back to the stairs. "Why can't I go upstairs?"
Vesper's hand comes up to cup my cheek, gently turning my face back to his. "Because Duske is trying not to show you that side of him. Not yet. It's not the prettiest thing in the world. Most people are terrified of Death."
"I already died. How much scarier can it be?" Blacking out and falling down the top of the stairs to my death was already terrifying. I couldn’t catch myself. There was no one to hear me scream. The terror that flooded my chest for the time afterwards still haunts me even if I don’t feel the pain anymore.
Vesper gives me a look and I sigh, slumping back against him.
"Fine. I won't go upstairs and confront the moody bastard. "
The Alpha’s lips curve into a small smile, and he presses a kiss to my temple. "Let him calm down first, okay? Why don't we watch a movie or something?"
I grin, twisting in his lap to look at him properly. "Babe, are you asking to cuddle? You know I like cuddles."
Milo chuckles, the Beta pushing to his feet to grab our plates. "Your cuddles always end up as something else."
I raise an eyebrow, my grin widening. "Are you complaining, Milo?
I come back from the dead or whatever, and suddenly it's like one of the biggest things on my mind.
Like, there's the scent and wanting to be around you guys, but there's also this weird need that's just kind of sitting there, waiting to be extinguished. It's kind of annoying."
Milo's expression softens, and he leans forward, his green eyes searching my face. "Does it hurt?"
I shake my head, my hand reaching out to take his.
"Not really. Not now, anyway. I felt like I was on fire before Vesper fucked me.
" I pause, my gaze dropping to my lap as the memories of Vesper’s cock thickening inside of me move to the forefront of my mind.
I stand and glare at his cock, staring at it for a long moment before looking back up at him.
"Okay, I need a few things explained. Mainly your cock. "
Vesper's eyes widen, and he suddenly looks nervous. "Did I hurt you from before?"
I shake my head quickly, my cheeks heating at the delicious memory of being stuffed by this man. Well, demon. "No, but… you didn't have a knot. It just kind of swelled. Everywhere."
I meet his gaze, my face burning with embarrassment, and Milo bursts out laughing as Vesper answers my question. "That's what happens when we fuck, most of the demons, anyway."
I glare at him, but there's no heat behind it. "You could have warned me."
Milo leans over my back, his lips brushing against my ear.
"You liked it, didn't you?" I just nod, my breath caught in my throat, making it impossible to think. It was a glorious feeling. Vesper just stares at me, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down nervously, his cock thickening between his thighs the longer I look.
A gasp falls from my lips at a newer sensation and I look down to see a tail flicking around my legs.
But it's not Vesper's. This one is different, thinner and more angular, with a darker hue. I twist around just enough to catch Milo’s forked tongue slipping between those plump lips of his, his eyes narrowing into slits with a hue of orange flickering in them.
He clears his throat, and just like that, he's back to normal. His face returns to its human form, the tail suddenly gone like it was never there. Milo steps back, the nervousness in his expression now matching Vesper’s.
What. the. Fuck.
But also… why did I like that?
I stare at Milo, my mind racing with a thousand possibilities. "How come all of this is happening now? I've never once seen anything remotely demonic about the three of you, but one day back from the dead and everything is all weird?"
Vesper drags a hand through his hair, his shoulders falling as he leans back in the chair. "Milo mentioned something earlier. He said that maybe none of this clicked because you were human before. And now… you're kind of not, which makes you viable to be our mate, bringing out our real selves."
"But I'm just a ghost, right?" Without ghost powers.
Vesper shrugs. "I've never heard of any kind of ghost that is able to hold the transition state longer than a few minutes. What Duske did… giving you that coffee? It shouldn't have worked."
"But it did. What does that mean?"
Milo leans forward, his expression growing more serious than I've seen it in a while. His green eyes lose some of their usual sparkle, replaced with genuine concern. "No idea. That kind of power shouldn't be something we are able to wield. Which makes this really confusing."
My head is full of thoughts and chaos, questions swirling around that would make even less sense if I asked them.
Each answer they give me only leads to more questions and more uncertainty.
I'm not human anymore, but I'm not fully dead either.
I'm stuck in this weird in-between, this liminal space where the rules don't seem to apply.
And I have no idea what that means for me, for us, for any of this.
I take a deep breath, trying to center myself, and force a smile onto my face. I need a break from all of this, from the heavy conversations and the impossible choices. "Hey, how about that movie?"
Vesper snorts, the sound affectionate rather than mocking, and his hand comes up to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear.
His fingers linger against my cheek for a moment.
"You don't have to rush into all of it, princess.
However, I think Duske is going to unintentionally scare you away with all the darkness talk, but it's your choice, alright? And I'm hoping you choose us."
I meet his gaze, my heart clenching at the vulnerability in his eyes. Vesper, who's always so confident, so sure of himself, looks almost uncertain. Like he's genuinely worried I might walk away. "I already chose you guys. I chose you a long time ago."
Vesper's expression softens, the tension in his shoulders easing, the Alpha sitting up to press a gentle kiss to my lips.
It's different from the heated, desperate kisses we shared earlier.
This one is more tender, like he's trying to convey everything he can't put into words.
I melt into him, my hand coming up to cup his cheek as I kiss him back, savoring the moment.
When we pull apart, my chest is warm and full despite all the uncertainty swirling around us. Milo is watching us with that quirky grin of his, his green eyes sparkling with mischief and something softer, something that looks like relief.
"So, movie?" he asks, his teases, clearly trying to bring some levity back into the room. "What movie do you want to watch?" Milo asks, pulling me from my thoughts.
I shrug, my gaze drifting toward the stairs despite my best efforts to focus on the present moment. "I don't know. You pick."
Milo grins, his enthusiasm returning as he selects something that looks like a cheesy action movie.
The opening credits start to roll, all dramatic music and explosions, but I'm not paying attention.
My mind is still on Duske, on the way he looked at me before he left, on the darkness that swirled around him like a living thing.
On the pain I saw flickering in his eyes.
Vesper's hand squeezes my shoulder gently, pulling me back to the present, and I glance up at him. "He'll be okay. He just needs some time to process."
I nod, leaning into him and letting his steady presence ground me. "I know. I just… I don't like seeing him upset."
Vesper's lips curve into a small smile, sad but gentle. "He's not upset, princess. He's just trying to protect you."
I frown, my brows furrowing as I try to understand. "Protect me from what?"
Vesper's gaze shifts to the stairs, and there's something heavy in his expression, something weighted with knowledge and history I don't have access to. "From himself."
I open my mouth to respond, but the words die in my throat.
Because suddenly, I understand. Duske is scared of what he is, of what he represents.
He's Death, the Grim Reaper, the one who guides souls to the other side.
And he's afraid that his darkness will hurt me, that it will corrupt me somehow, that it will drive me away.
He's afraid that what he is will be too much for me to handle.
But he doesn't understand that I'm not afraid of him. I'm not afraid of any of them.
I settle back against Vesper, trying to focus on the movie playing on the screen, but my gaze keeps drifting upward.
My mind is still upstairs, still with Duske.
And I know that sooner or later, probably sooner, I'm going to have to go up there and face him.
Because I need him to understand that I'm not going anywhere.
That his darkness doesn't scare me. That I want all of him, not just the parts he thinks are acceptable.
Not now, not ever.