Chapter 19
Chapter Nineteen
Lying in bed with Emmanuel’s arms around me, I feel safe.
That feeling tells me I’ve lost my damn mind.
There is nothing safe about this man. I can’t seem to stay away, though.
I’m drawn to him in a way I’ve never been drawn to anything in my life.
It’s both suffocating and like being able to fully breathe for the first time.
Confusing is what it is. And I have no idea what to do about it.
Which is why I’m giving him the week he so desperately wants.
After this week, I’ll return to my life in my small town, and he’ll go back to Mexico.
Sure, our paths will probably cross again.
Our best friends are married to each other.
My fingers trace over the letters that spell out my name on his arm. It’s insane that he tattooed this on him. Truth is, I secretly love it. I can’t recall a time someone has wanted to memorialize me to the point of having my name permanently on their skin.
I wonder if he has the other girl’s name on him.
The one he so clearly did not want to talk about?
I should make a point to inspect every inch of this man’s body, just to find out.
I didn’t want to press him about her, because there are plenty of things in my past that I never want to tell him either.
It would be hypocritical for me to push him to open up if I’m not prepared to do the same.
There’s also a small part of me that is jealous, no matter how stupid that is.
I close my eyes and inhale, loving the warmth that surrounds me. Emmanuel’s arms tighten around my body. He’s been asleep for the last thirty minutes. I don’t want to move, because I don’t want to wake him. Also, I like being right here. Next to him.
“No, don’t touch me!” I cry out, struggling against his hold.
A scream jolts me and my eyes pop open. I look around the room. Emmanuel is sitting next to me on the bed, his jaw tense. Something’s made him angry. I want to reach out and pull him into my arms, comfort him. But then he opens his mouth.
“Who?” he growls. His voice deep, cold. His eyes are darker than I’ve ever seen them.
“Did I fall asleep?” I ask. That never happens. We’re still on the plane, so I couldn’t have slept for long.
“Who the fuck touched you, Evie? I want a name.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I lie.
“You cried out don’t touch me. Don’t lie to me, Evie,” he says.
“Then don’t ask me questions I can’t answer.” I get out of bed and find my discarded clothes. “Were you watching me sleep? How long was I asleep?” I really don’t like people being in the room with me when I’m asleep.
“I don’t know. I woke up when you started thrashing around, crying out for someone not to fucking touch you. I got off the bed, thinking you were afraid of me, but you were asleep, Evie. Who were you dreaming about?”
“It was a nightmare, not a dream, and it wasn’t real,” I argue as I get dressed.
Emmanuel stares at me. Watching me. His jaw ticks and his eyebrows furrow.
I know he’s frustrated, but I need air. I need to get away from him before I cave and tell him everything…
before I ruin everything. I want this one week, damn it.
Just let me have this man for a week so I can look back when I’m old and say I once lived for myself.
“I need some water,” I say, walking out of the bedroom. The plane is still in the air, so it hasn’t been long.
“Ma’am, can I get you anything?” the flight staff, whose name I’ve forgotten, asks me.
“Can I get a water, please?” I reply.
“Sure, ma’am. Would you like me to bring it to the bedroom for you?” she offers.
“No, I’ll sit out here. Thank you.” I take a seat on the closest recliner. How on earth did I fall asleep?
A minute later, a body fills the seat next to mine. I don’t need to look to know it’s Emmanuel. “You know I only want to kill the people who haunt your nightmares, Evie.”
I turn to look at him. “I don’t want you to kill anyone for me, E. Let’s just forget it and enjoy the week.”
Emmanuel’s eyes scrutinize me. “If you think I’m letting it go, think again.
Someone hurt you and I will find out who it was.
You might not want me to kill them, but I promise you I’m going to.
And when I do, you’ll be able to sleep knowing they can never hurt you again. No one will ever hurt you again.”
It’s a nice thought, a lie I could easily see myself falling into. I’m not going to be that person. I’m not going to be so insanely stupid to let myself believe that he can keep me safe from the monsters in this world.
“I know violence is your thing. It’s how you run your business, but it’s not mine, E. I don’t like guns. I don’t like blood, and I don’t like the idea of people dying because of me.”
“I’m going to teach you how to fight, how to shoot, and how to use a knife. Once you’re familiar with them, you won’t fear them as much.”
That’s what he got from me saying I don’t like violence?
I shake my head. “I don’t want to be familiar with weapons, E. I just want…” I pause, because I don’t know what it is I want anymore. I was content living my boring, small-town life. I have good friends. I have a great business. I didn’t need or want anything else.
Now, there’s Emmanuel. I want him in ways I never thought I’d want someone. I also want it to be temporary. I can’t do the forever thing. I’m not girlfriend material. I can’t even fall asleep next to him without waking him with my nightmares.
“I want you to be safe. That’s all. I want to be able to protect you, Evie. I can’t fail you. I won’t fail again,” Emmanuel says.
“What do you mean again? You haven’t failed me at anything, Emmanuel.”
“I couldn’t protect you from whatever happened in your past, but I can make sure those who caused your nightmares learn their mistake,” he says. But I don’t think that’s what he meant when he said again.
“You didn’t know me in the past.”
“I should have met you sooner.” He’s serious. I can’t help but laugh.
“Yeah, okay, that’s not really how life works, E. You might be used to controlling everything that happens in the world you live in, but that’s not normal. And unless you have a time machine, not even you can change the past.”
“I could hire a team of scientists to get working on that time machine.” He smirks.
“That would be a complete waste of money. I’m sure you have more important things to spend your money on.”
“I do have a niece now.”
“You already gave her a ten-million-dollar trust. What else could you possibly give her?” I ask him.
“Whatever she wants.” He shrugs.
“So what are you planning while we’re in Vegas? You have me for one week.”
“My plan is to keep you naked and in my bed for as long as possible, stopping only for food breaks.”
“And here I was, thinking you were going to wine and dine me.” I wasn’t, but I wouldn’t say no to seeing just how Emmanuel Lopez wines and dines a lady.
“You want to go out?” He looks at me curiously. “Like on dates?”
“Well, isn’t that what people do when they’re getting to know each other?”
“I wouldn’t know. I’ve never dated anyone,” he says.
“I thought you had a teenage girlfriend.”
“We were kids, Evie. It’s not the same.” At the mention of her, Emmanuel’s whole persona changes. He looks away from me and something flickers in his eyes. Pain maybe?
Now I’m more curious about who this mystery girl is and what she did to hurt him so much. “Do you have her name on you too?” The question is out of my mouth before I can stop it.
“No, you are the only person I’ve wanted to imprint on my skin, on my soul, mi alma.”
“You don’t even know me. I still think it’s insane you did that.” I look down at his arm, and a small smile spreads across my face. “It is pretty, though.”
“It’s a reminder of what I have to lose if I fail,” he says, following my line of sight.
I don’t have it in me to tell him that he can’t fail, because I won’t be sticking around long enough for him to fuck anything up. It’s a week. What could possibly go wrong in a week?
“Are you planning on seeing your friends while we’re here?” I ask, changing the subject to something lighter.
“I’d prefer not to have to share your attention with anyone else,” he grunts.
“Okay. I haven’t told Charlotte I was coming to town. I don’t really want her to know that this is a thing. I’d rather we keep it between us.”
“You ashamed to be seen with me, mi alma?” Emmanuel quirks a brow.
“No, it’s not that. It’s just… it’s a week. We don’t need to have the world involved in what you and I do,” I explain.
Every time I mention the timeframe, Emmanuel’s jaw ticks. He doesn’t like it. But it is what it is. We live in different places. He’s a cartel boss. I’m a dress shop owner. We might be compatible in bed, but that’s where it ends.
“We will do this your way until your way doesn’t work anymore,” he says. I have no idea what he means by that. I also don’t really feel like arguing about it either, so I drop it.
I look around the plane. A girl really could get used to living in luxury. “This is a really nice jet.”
“You want one? I’ll buy you your own.” Emmanuel shrugs.
“Don’t you dare do anything stupid like that.” After seeing how generous he is with his friends and new niece, I wouldn’t put it past him. “I’m not here because you have more money than you know what to do with, E. I’m here because you have a really nice dick.” I smirk.
“My really nice dick thanks you for being here.” He laughs.