Chapter 18
Chapter Eighteen
~ Thane ~
I’m losing my fucking mind. Anger tears me up inside, and I struggle to keep it hidden as we stand around the thick iron table in one of the war chambers.
Queen Blake and her kings are all scrutinizing the map that’s spread across the entire span of the table’s surface.
Knox stands on my right beside Ambrose and Lankin, and Raith and Galen stand on my left beside Ravyn and Xera.
We’ve been going over the terrain of the shadow realm, covering the basics like where the Xalgrith attacks first started, the most difficult regions to defend, and the fortification of the shadow city, but I can hardly focus.
I’m supposed to be the fucking reasonable one, but when Germain threatened my mate during the shekel’s interrogation, I was so close to losing control.
So close to splattering him on the wall and damning the consequences.
I tell myself that’s because Germain has it coming.
He has always been hot headed and too quick to use his sword, even when it’s not needed.
But I’ve never had trouble tolerating him in the past. He has his place in this war, or so I reasoned.
But now, my thoughts are consumed with ways to decapitate the shadow warrior, perhaps after a lengthy torture session.
I can’t, of course, as that would anger the shadow queen and in turn, endanger Shade’s life. Krosia will be looking for any reason to end my mate’s life, and I won’t be the fool to give her one.
At the thought of my mate, desire rushes through me.
I’ve always been drawn to her, as much as I tried to deny it in the beginning, but now she consumes my every thought.
I want to be with her, making her feel safe, and burying inside her and making her cry out in ecstasy over and over…
The need to bond with Shade is an aching, persistent need that’s getting harder to ignore.
I want to be sharing her with Raith and Galen, but especially Knox.
I want to watch my two loves fall apart as we lose ourselves to the pleasure.
I want our souls connected with a bond so strong that even death could not separate us.
A shadow winds around my leg. A subtle touch, hidden by the high table, and I clear my dry throat, trying to maintain control over myself. I don’t look at Knox, but I’m grateful for his intervention. Fuck.
We can’t bond. I know that. But when Shade whimpered in pain that last time, telling us what she needed, I was almost hopeless to resist.
Only one can make you break. Beware the bond of your beloved mate.
It’s probably a good thing the oracle’s gone.
If he were still around, I might not be able to hold back my frustration.
It’s interesting how these two lines can dictate our entire lives, placing us in a form of torture.
It’s hell refusing the bond, and I can only fucking hope we can end this war, so Shade is no longer a threat.
Then I will happily lay down my sword and spend my days worshipping my mate in our bed… and in my heart.
“We have scouts all around the shadow realm,” Xera says, pulling my thoughts back to the war council. “With units ready to respond with force, but for the past few years the attacks have been growing more frequent, and we’re spread thin.”
Queen Blake frowns as she assesses the map. “And there’s no known pattern to their movements?”
“None that we can determine,” Xera replies. “The last three attacks were here,” she points to a location on the map near the rocky mountains, then moves her finger to two other spots, “here and here. They’re all remote locations that have no military significance.”
Dante crosses his arms, his tail flicking in the air beside him. “How often do they attack the shadow city?”
“Rarely,” I answer this time, mostly just to keep my head straight. “Generally, they appear in locations away from the city.”
“If this was just about seizing control of the realm, you would think tearing down the monarchy and seizing the city would be their main priority. That suggests they’re after something else. Have they been amassing near any major resources in the shadow realm?” Blake asks.
I try not to look at the demon queen, because she’s playing a dangerous game. I know she’s trying to get the other originals to slip up and give us some indication as to whether they know what Krosia’s after.
“No,” Ravyn replies, tapping her chin thoughtfully with her finger.
“That was one of my early theories. When they come, they don’t take anything back with them, and yet, this realm has a large supply of many resources including various minerals and natural gases.
It’s almost as if they come here simply to battle us, but of course, that makes no logical sense. ”
“Did questioning the zenali creature yield any information?” Lankin inquires.
She doesn’t look at me or my friends. No, she directs her gaze to Ambrose, showing where her allegiance lies.
I can’t blame her. The revelation that Shade is our mate has changed the dynamic.
By us fighting to keep Shade alive, Lankin undoubtedly sees it as a betrayal to the war effort.
It doesn’t matter if Shade is fated to us.
Blake and her mates are smart enough not to react to the question, and Blake glares at the map like she thinks it has all the answers but it’s intentionally keeping them from her.
“No, but another creature will be here tomorrow for interrogation,” Xera replies. “I’ve already checked in with Her Highness, and Jorvik and Virelle are on the hunt.”
“What creature is it this time?” Raith rumbles, annoyance flickering on his face.
He’s as pissed off about Shade’s encounter with the shekel as the rest of us.
It’s not just about hating that they’re putting Shade in danger.
But seeing that look on Shade’s face when the creature ended its own life, tugged at something inside me.
An emotion I’d buried long ago to preserve my own sanity.
When that shekel had died, my mate’s sadness was real, and for the first time in a long while, I felt… ashamed.
I tell myself that’s irrational. We’re here to help this realm, and without the shadow warriors this land would have been turned to ash long ago. But that doesn’t stop the churning questions in my thoughts. Questions that I’ve ignored for way too long.
“A wespet, if you must know,” Ambrose states.
Raith smashes his fist on the table, and the tension in the room heightens. “This is madness. There are only a handful of those ancient creatures in this realm. We can’t afford to lose any more.”
“Lose them?” Ambrose says, not an ounce of sympathy in his expression as he narrows his eyes at Raith.
“We’ve lost countless warriors over the centuries.
What’s the life of one wespet? If we don’t find an advantage soon, none of the creatures in this realm will exist. Your so-called mate will interrogate this next creature, unless of course, she is unwilling to assist in the war effort. ” He gives Raith a challenging look.
Raith opens his mouth to speak, but I beat him to it.
“Shade will question this creature,” I confirm.
“But Ambrose and Germain are not to be present during questioning. Also, it must be released after that. Shade will not partake in pointless murder.” I tell myself that part is for Shade, because that’s what we agreed, but as the words leave my mouth, something inside me lightens just a little.
Ambrose scowls. “You’ve forgotten what’s at stake. Your little mate is already messing with your decision-making capabilities. What is one life when its death can be the salvation of so many others?”
“Now that would be an interesting conversation,” Galen drawls, “if the wespet’s death was actually going to save lives.
But as I see it, there aren’t any consequences to letting the creature live.
Murdering the wespet would be needless bloodshed.
Besides, if the creatures know they’ll be returned to their homes, they might be more forthcoming with information. ”
Ambrose rests his hands on the table and gives me a challenging look. “So these are to be your terms then? If so, I shall relay them to the queen.”
Blake looks up from the map and rolls her eyes.
“Gods you’re insufferable. Here. I’ll make this easy for you.
” She levels Ambrose with a hard stare. “I have no idea what this creature is, but if it’s no threat to the war, then release it after questioning and be done with it.
It’s not hard. I’m sure Raith and the others here will see to it.
If anything, you should be grateful to have less clean up.
I share Shade’s thoughts on cruelty, and I won’t fight for those who preach peace and yet slaughter innocents. ”
“Innocents?” Ambrose splutters. “They’re creatures.” He says it like the zenali are nothing more than insignificant beings rather than the highly intelligent ancient inhabitants of the shadow realm. Inhabitants that existed here long before we did.
Blake’s gaze meets mine for a fraction of a second, just long enough for me to see she’s as pissed off about the conversation as the rest of us, despite her relaxed attitude.
“Yes, I would think needlessly slaughtering innocent creatures is below you,” Blake says, keeping her chin high.
“Now unless you want me questioning Queen Krosia as to why she permits her generals to waste time killing innocent beings while claiming she fights for peace, I suggest you get on the same page as the rest of us.”
Ambrose’s nostrils flare, but he doesn’t reply.
Truthfully, it’s Krosia who would have ordered the death of the creatures after questioning, but Krosia’s loyalties can be fickle, and if Queen Blake started questioning things, Ambrose must realize there’s no guarantee the shadow queen would defend him.