3. Chapter 3
Chapter 3
Freya
I n the week I’ve been back home, I’ve been helping Mom through her withdrawals, in between the odd shift I’ve picked up at the diner.
It’s been hell—watching her as pale as a ghost, her body trembling, and her begging me to give her drugs to help her take the pain away.
My arms are covered in bruises from her assaults, but it’s a small price to pay.
If Alec was here, he’d be helping me—this is all he ever wanted.
For Mom to recover and be her usual self again.
For us to have a fresh start.
I don’t know what the future holds for us, but this is something.
I’m praying with everything I’ve got that she can get through this.
I flip over the eggs, then the bacon sizzling in the pan.
Mom’s singing nursery rhymes, and the sound makes my ears bleed, but I don’t tell her to stop, because it’s nice to see her like this.
She hasn’t vomited once today, and last night, she slept for five hours straight without waking in a panicked fever.
Day seven, and she’s turning a corner, and I couldn’t be happier.
She’s folding our clothes, fresh from the wash, humming along to the radio.
I dish up our breakfast and pour us both a cup of coffee.
“Let’s eat out front today. The sun’s out,” she says, taking her mug and plate.
I follow her out the front and fall into one of the chairs on the small patch of dead grass.
The crisp, early morning air sends shivers down my arms.
The familiar buzz of my phone breaks through the silence.
I pull my cell out and stare at the screen.
It’s Hazen again.
All week, he, Gage, and Amirah have been bombarding my phone with messages.
They’re begging me to come back, but I’ve been too focused on Mom to leave.
I’ve been enjoying her company for the first time in years.
Still, I miss the guys.
And I hope I get to see them soon.
We eat in silence, watching the sun peek over the trailers.
“Are those boys still calling you?” Mom asks, eyeing me with a raised eyebrow.
“Yeah, they want me to visit. So does Amirah. Is it okay if I go? Will you be okay without me?”
Mom clicks her tongue and doesn’t say anything for several seconds.
“You’re a grown-ass woman, so I’m not going to tell you what you can and can’t do.” She lets out a heavy breath, placing her plate on the little table between us, and I wait for the but because I know it’s coming.
“But The Brotherhood is dangerous. They want everyone to drop to their knees, to obey their every rule, and if you don’t, we know better than anyone what those consequences are.”
“I know, Mom, but Lucas, Gage, and Hazen? They’re different. Now that they’re in charge, things will change in Daringhood. We’ll have more freedom and peace. Hazen has always said he’s not as against the Hood as his father was,” I reply, and Mom snorts.
“Honey, you’re beautiful, there’s no doubt about that—you get your good looks from your mama—but it won’t be enough to convince them to make that kind of change. They’ve been brainwashed since they were little kids to follow The Brotherhood’s guild, and there’s no undoing that.”
I lean back in my chair, bringing the mug to my lips.
I don’t want to change the guys.
They are who they are.
But I want more unity between the two towns, and I’m going to try to convince them of the same.
Dominic may have raised them, but they aren’t like him.
I wouldn’t have fallen for them if they were.
“Why didn’t you tell us about Alec’s father?” The words fall from my lips before I have a chance to overthink them.
It’s been on my mind since Nadine dropped the bomb that night a week ago.
Mom says nothing for several long seconds.
The air around us tightens and my shoulders tense as I wait for her to flip her shit.
Anytime I used to bring up personal things with her, she’d rip my head off.
She exhales, placing her mug down on the table between us.
“How’d you find out?” she asks, and I turn to face her.
She stares blankly out into the trailer park.
Do I tell her everything that happened that night, or will it just make her worry even more?
She’s got enough going on with getting clean, and I don’t want her spiraling because of this.
“Nadine told me,” I declare, giving her a crumb of what happened that night, and Mom grips the arms of her chair.
“That fucking bitch—I hate her. It wasn’t her place to tell you that,” she hisses.
“Well, you never told me or Alec,” I huff.
“I wasn’t allowed to. When they banished us, that was part of the reason. Dominic made it very clear that Alec wasn’t part of The Brotherhood anymore, even though he had Fox blood running through his veins.”
“Why didn’t you at least tell me when he went missing? Did you wonder if they’d killed him, thinking someone had spilled the truth about his father?” Dominic was the ultimate villain in Alec’s death, but surely information like that could have helped us find him.
Mom shakes her head.
“I called George—he swore it wasn’t him.” A sad sheen glasses her eyes.
“And I know he wouldn’t lie to me. We may not have made it as a couple, but once, he loved me. That’s the only reason I was allowed to leave with my life.”
“Why? Why were you asked to leave?” I know full well that we were banished because of her habit, but I want to hear it from her mouth.
To see if she takes responsibility for her actions.
“Because . . . because . . . I—” She sighs, dropping her head into her hands.
“Don’t make me say it, Freya. I know I fucked up. I’ve been fucking up every day since, and it kills me that now Alec has paid the price for my mistakes. They took him from us, just like they said they would. I want to kill that bitch—everything is her fault.”
“She’s dead,” I say, and Mom whirls around, staring at me.
She smiles, and I’m taken aback.
I haven’t seen her beam like this for years.
“Thank fuck for that, and the world is good again.” She leans back in her seat, and I don’t want to ask anything more today.
I don’t want to push her any further, because I’m afraid she’ll turn back to the one thing that fucked everything up for us.
I don’t feel good about killing Nadine.
Hell, I wish I could go back and undo what I’ve done.
But I can’t.
Besides, she ruined my family, enabled my mother’s drug habit, and took my brother from me.
Lucas shared a brother with me, and we never knew.
Lucas never had the privilege of really knowing Alec, and that’s a shame.
All because The Brotherhood believed they could do what they like, take what they like, without consequence.
Yeah.
Now that the boys are in charge, something has to change.
And if they’re not up for it, maybe I can help convince them.
Mom and I stay outside in a comfortable silence, finishing our coffees and listening to the birds sing.
Somewhere in the trailer park, a man is yelling at his son, arguing over who’ll take the trash out.
Stupid shit.
I check my phone and curse.
“I’ve gotta get to work. You good?” I ask, standing and collecting our dishes.
“Yep, I’m just going to stay out here for a bit. Think Jessie is coming over later to keep me company,” she answers, closing her eyes, and before I can think twice, I press a kiss against her cheek.
My heart thumps against my rib cage, waiting for her to shove me away, but she doesn’t.
I haven’t kissed my mother like that for years.
I move back into the house.
A tear slides down my cheek, and I quickly place the dishes into the sink, wiping the tear away.
If only Alec was here to see her.
It feels like someone reaches into my chest and pulls my heart out, squeezing it until it pops.
It’s been almost two months now since I found him, and I thought, with time, it would be less painful, but it isn’t.
Everything that’s been happening makes me wish Alec was here with me, like he should be.
Resting my arms on my knees, I lean forward, waiting for Amirah to show up.
Being around my mother this past week has reminded me how much I’ve missed her.
It’s also made me realize what our life could be like if we had more freedom—something I need to get the guys on board with.
We need change around here, and now that they are leaders, they have that kind of power.
Amirah’s pink Bentley Bacalar pulls up in front of me, and I stand up off the sidewalk in front of the diner, brushing the dirt from my ass.
Opening the passenger door, I slide in, and Amirah leans over the console, crushing me in a hug.
“I fucking missed you, girl. Next time you’re gone for a week, I’m coming to drag your ass home,” she declares, before pulling back, and I laugh.
“I missed you too.” I click my seat belt into place and fall back against the plush leather seat.
“Now, I want all the details about what you’ve been doing every hour, minute, and second since you’ve been gone,” she demands, and for the car ride back to her place, I do just that.
She pulls into her driveway and parks in the front of their house.
“Holy shit, babe. I can’t believe your mom is sober. That’s so good!”
“Yeah, I just hope it lasts this time. You know how many times she’s tried before, but she hasn’t ever gotten this far. Now that she’s through the worst of the withdrawals, hopefully she can keep going.”
I don’t think I can handle another day of cleaning up her vomit and changing the sheets from her excessive sweating.
I follow Amirah into the Ledger mansion, and she moves through the foyer, heading for the kitchen.
“My fingers are crossed, and if I can do anything to help, just let me know. That’s what best friends are for.” She wraps her arm over my shoulder, and I lean into her.
I’ve missed her this past week.
I feel closer to her than ever after the fight with Lucas.
Not being around my friends has been hard.
“I was thinking we could watch a movie, eat until our tummies are sore, then pass out?” Her face beams.
“Sounds perfect, but I do need to see the guys first to run some things past them. Is that okay?”
Amirah huffs.
“Fine, that’ll give me time to get everything ready for our slumber party.” She disappears into the pantry.
“Do you know where they are?” I ask.
“When I last saw Gage, he was in his bedroom.”
Does he know I’m here?
If he did, he’d be with me, not letting me out of sight.
It’s been a week since they walked away from me, and there’s so much I want to say but can’t.
Not yet.
I follow Amirah into the pantry.
“Can I borrow one of your dresses?”
Amirah smirks.
“What are you planning?”
“A business meeting.”
“With who and what about?”
“The guys and about the future.”
Amirah purses her lips, eyes widening.
“Fuck, yeah! Give those men some of that woman power. You’re welcome to anything in my closet.”
I head out of the kitchen and up the stairs, taking them two at a time.
The closer I get to Gage’s room, the faster my heart beats.
I pause outside it, and the faint sound of music reaches my ears.
Only the door stands between us.
I want to push it open and see him, but I’ve got a plan.
After continuing down the hall and into Amirah’s room, I close the door behind me.
Her king-size bed is neatly made with a white-and-pink comforter.
Nothing is out of place.
I open her closet and there are rows and rows of beautiful garments.
It’s like walking into a clothing store.
I spend the next several minutes scanning over everything, trying to find something that will work.
I want to look smart but sexy.
A baby-blue suit jacket hangs neatly in front of me, and I pull it out.
Bringing it closer to my body, I note that it sits mid-thigh.
This will be perfect.
I grab one of Amirah’s black lace bodices to go underneath and some knee-high black socks with heart-shaped suspenders.
My black cotton thong doesn’t really go, but it’ll do.
After dropping my clothes to the floor, I get dressed before staring at my reflection in the mirror.
I do up the buttons of the suit jacket, so I’m not completely naked from the waist down.
I don’t want to distract the guys too much.
Although this is bound to distract them just enough.
To finish off the look, I slide into a pair of Amirah’s black Prada heels.
This outfit costs as much as I make in at least six months of working at the diner.
The difference between me and my best friend is crazy, but I did live like this once.
Well, we weren’t this well-off, but we were comfortable.
We didn’t have to worry about money until we did—when my mother developed a habit and everything went to shit.
It’d be better if Mom had never developed her habit, but I’m glad I grew up over the train tracks.
Even if we live poor, anything is better than being around Dominic, fearing what he’ll do next.
I really do hate him.
Thank God he’s MIA, and I hope he stays gone.
But if I’ve learned anything from Dominic over the years, it’s that he won’t ever truly disappear.
He’s been released from jail, and he’s out there somewhere.
I won’t be able to relax until he’s dead.
I brush my fingers through my dark-brown hair, and it falls down my back in soft waves.
After grabbing my phone from my discarded jeans on the ground, I pull up a group text with Gage, Hazen, and Lucas.
My fingers pause over Lucas’s name and my chest squeezes.
The last time I saw him, he couldn’t even look at me, and I don’t blame him.
I killed his mother.
Even if it was in self-defense, I took away someone who meant so much to him, and nothing can change that.
Still, we have business to discuss.
And if I don’t put myself out there, nothing will change.
Meet me in the Ledger office in ten minutes.
Without waiting for a reply, I shove my phone into the suit jacket pocket, ready for a business meeting that will either unite us or create a divide we might never come back from.