16. Chapter Sixteen
16
Luca
Four hours and a sizable chunk of my bank account later, I stood outside Aria's rooms at the compound, waiting for Sofia. I'd sent her on her way with the instructions to buy whatever she needed for work and something to make herself feel pretty. Aria was only too happy to help; Sofia's wardrobe had been severely depleted over the past few months thanks to her shoestring budget, and I saw the longing in her eyes when she and Aria talked clothes. It wasn't much, but if I could do this one thing for her, then it would be worth it.
I paced back and forth in the hallway, tugging at the collar of my shirt. I felt ridiculous; I hadn't dressed up like this in ages. It had been a long time since I went on a real date, and the ones I'd had with Emilia were never like this. Wining and dining, flowers and sweet-talk, and things like that had never really been our style. Then again, she'd never really looked at me like that anyway.
I'd come to the realization that my unrequited love for Emilia had never been anything more than fantasy. What I'd felt for her had always been a desire for something pure and innocent, for the emotions I thought she represented, but it had been born out of desperation to have the one thing I never felt—unconditional love. I hadn't gotten it from my parents, I hadn't felt it with my brothers here since coming to the compound all those years ago, and I certainly hadn't seen it in the dark violence of this life. For years, I'd been desperate to finally understand the concept of someone caring about you for no reason other than you were you, that what you thought or felt had any weight at all, and in some twisted way, I'd believed that the only thing I'd be able to find that with was in another desperate person just like me. That's what I'd built up a love for Emilia to be—the idea of love.
But in the end, it held very little substance.
With Sofia, it was something different. It was spontaneous and terrifying, reckless and beautiful. I'd long since stopped expecting any affection from the world, so for the love I held for Sofia to blossom and grow was nothing short of astounding. It grew because she nourished it, because she took the risk, not because I had any part to play in it. But her strength and her unapologetic lack of fear of me had begun to slowly chip away the walls surrounding my frozen heart. Although she drove me nuts, frustrated me beyond compare, I felt a closeness to her that scared the hell out of me, only because I wouldn’t be around long enough to see it through to fruition.
Standing outside Aria's doorway, heart hammering, throat dry, I almost felt like laughing. It was ridiculous; I didn't know why I was so nervous all of a sudden. This wasn't like me. Maybe it was because this was the first normal thing I'd done in well over two years. Maybe it was because I wasn't used to feeling this happy. But maybe...probably...it was just her. Everything mattered more when it was—
Sofia.
My brain froze as the door opened, halting all coherent thought. For a moment it felt like my heart simply stopped as I looked down at Sofia, standing there with a nervous smile of her own and looking like an angel come down from heaven.
My angel.
My Sofia.
She was wearing a dark blue wrap dress with pale flowers detailed on the fabric, a more modern cut but on her it looked almost vintage. The color brought out her flawless complexion, making her look like she was glowing from the inside. Her hair had been styled, and she wore makeup—not too much, but just enough to bring out the rich color of her eyes, right down to the flecks of gold around the iris. My eyes poured over her figure, heat flaring when I saw how the dress hugged her curves, her long legs accentuated by the heels she wore.
Goddamn, I had to make a conscious effort to not drop my jaw to the floor.
When I finally looked up, her eyes were sparkling with amusement. And maybe just a touch of the desire I felt reflected back at me.
"Do I...pass inspection?" she asked shyly.
Aria's head popped up behind her while I stood, speechless. "Oh, look...you broke Luca," she laughed.
Say something, you idiot!
"You're fucking gorgeous," I said, my voice husky.
Sofia blushed, and I felt my heart begin to beat again. I realized she was staring at me with the same longing, open hunger, and I wondered how we were ever going to make it through dinner.
"Mission accomplished," Aria smirked.
***
The restaurant wasn't anything that would've caught my eye before. But it had an intimate feel, small and cozy, dim light that allowed our corner table a little privacy. A small but surprisingly crowded dance floor bordered one wall. Unlike the usual places I’d frequented with the boys, which were usually fancier than necessary and made you feel like you should be in a B-list mob movie, this one was clean, casual, and...normal. As much as a place owned by criminals who would shoot you in the back in a heartbeat could be considered normal.
Part of me felt foolish for taking such a big risk. There was a danger involved in going out in public like this, for both of us. After the events two years ago that put the Moretti Crime Family firmly in the public eye, everywhere we went, we were likely to be recognized for what we were. Sal's bloodthirsty swipe through North Boston hadn't helped. It was like wearing a gigantic target on your head for everyone to see, although this seemed a little more private. But it made Sofia happy. And right now, seeing the way the low lighting from the chandeliers in the dining room reflected off her dark eyes...I would've burned down cities to see that glow. I wasn't dumb; I knew when I'd fallen hard for someone.
Sofia's fingers intertwined with mine under the table, her eyes never leaving mine. I hadn't felt a connection like this with someone in years, not since Emilia. Not that I would even try to compare what Sofia and I had with Emilia and I had. That had been naivety and misplaced desire, while this was bone deep and made my entire body vibrate when she moved. We sat like that in silence for a moment, enjoying the mutual comfort of each other's presence, holding hands across the table.
I felt her squeeze my hand, a soft smile touching her full lips. It was strange being here with her; her very presence seemed to drive away any of the confusion and anger at the predicament I found myself in. In her light, I was brought into clarity. So many months trapped in that hospital bed with nothing but the torment of the past and guilt and anger and frustration as my only companions...and yet here was the one thing I might have left that truly mattered. Her. It had always been her.
It had just taken me a year and a half to figure that out.
"This is nice," Sofia said at last, giving me a soft smile. "Thanks for bringing me here."
I squeezed her hand back, my lips turning up in a slight grin. "You're welcome."
"The food smells amazing. I'm starving."
"Yeah, me too." And for once, it was actually true.
Things with me seemed to be getting better. Sure, I still had bad days where it was hard for me to stay awake longer than five hours at a time, but I was gaining weight back, sleeping more soundly, and finding my headaches becoming less and less frequent. Whether that was due to getting my act together or a final flare before the end, I wasn't sure. Nor was I willing to venture too far down that road.
Whatever it was, I'd take it. I couldn't deny there was something about this girl that brought warmth to the coldest depths of my soul. She made everything just...easier. Less painful somehow. I felt lighter when she was near. More capable. More human.
I wasn't na?ve to think that the love of a good woman would magically fix me. That wasn't the way disability or life worked. Things would continue to decline; I didn't see myself getting much better than I currently was, and the amount of effort I had to put forward just to make it through the day wouldn't become easier as time marched on. I knew the pain in my joints, the dizzy spells, the nausea, the pounding migraines wouldn't just vanish because in the name of love.
But having Sofia around dulled those problems, made them seem more bearable, as though the happiness we shared could cancel out the bleakness. If my fate was already decided, if I was destined to die soon, I wanted to spend every last waking minute I had left loving and living.
The waiter came and left, the menus were left for us to ponder, and then finally we were alone once more.
"So, Dominic is back," Sofia began, fiddling with the tablecloth. She looked nervous.
I stiffened slightly, remembering my anger at seeing Dominic so close to her, his filthy hands wrapped around her arm like he had a right to lay claim. Like she wasn't hers. I hated how helpless I felt seeing his predatory eyes fixed on her like she was some sort of object for him to win, claim, destroy. It was so close to what had happened with Emilia that I could still taste the bile in my throat.
I let out a breath, reaching for my glass and taking a large swig. My head was beginning to pound slightly with the familiar ache of an incoming headache, but I refused to let it bother me.
"He's back, but don't worry. I'm not going to let him get close to you again."
"That's not what I--I mean, thank you, but what does that mean? Why is Dominic back, after all this time. All the problems he's caused--"
"It means Sal is more concerned with putting bodies on the streets than he is in maintaining the family's integrity." I scoffed, shaking my head. "Dominic has been gone for years now, he hasn't proven he can handle this responsibility...and Sal brings him in to..."
"To what?"
I shook my head. I didn't want to upset Sofia further; she had been through enough as it was. Telling her what Dominic was really up to would only make matters worse.
"Nothing. Forget it. Dante and I have that asshole under control," I waved my hand dismissively.
Sofia was quiet as the waiter came back with our food, sliding two steaming plates onto the table between us before leaving once more. Her brows furrowed together, and she chewed on her lip for a moment, lost in thought. I could tell there was something bothering her, some concern that nagged at her relentlessly, threatening to break through her composure. But instead of talking about it, she forced a smile instead and picked up her fork.
Then she set it down again.
"Beth's funeral is in two weeks," she said quietly.
Shit. Beth. Of course. The last few days had been so hectic that I'd forgotten completely.
"I want to go," Sofia confirmed, but her voice wavered slightly, unsure, betraying the unease just below the surface. "I don't know anything about her family, so I haven't been able to find out...I don't know, how they're doing with all this. It was just so horrible. I want to be able to do something...anything..."
Tears welled up in her eyes as she spoke, making them sparkle brightly beneath the chandelier lights above. It took every ounce of self-control I possessed not to reach across the table and wipe them away, to pull her into my arms and hold her until she forgot all about Beth and everything else that was causing her such distress right now. But instead, I settled for squeezing her hand reassuringly.
"We can go. Together."
"I know...but it doesn't seem like enough, you know? They lost their daughter. A sister. And now she's dead. Gone forever. All because..."
She broke off abruptly, swallowing hard as she wiped angrily at her cheeks, as if furious with herself for letting her emotions get the best of her again. "Have you found out anything about who...who killed her?"
I clenched my jaw as I watched her compose herself, trying not to let my anger show in front of her. I knew damn well who had murdered that poor girl that night, and I wondered if Dominic had timed it so Sofia would be the one to find her. As a final fuck you.
"Not yet, but I won't stop until they pay. Beth will get her justice."
Sofia nodded slowly, looking thoughtful once again. Finally, she smiled at me—a faint smile—and I felt the tension ebb slightly from my body.
"Okay." She nodded again before picking up her fork and poking at her salad listlessly, seemingly deep in thought. "So what are your plans now that Dominic is back? Is he taking over for the family?"
"No." My voice was hard as I picked up my own silverware. I could barely think about the idea of Dominic taking charge without feeling a snarl build up in the back of my throat. The idiot was about as stable as a hand grenade with the pin pulled; he surely wasn't smart enough to run things. He was arrogant and reckless—and in our world, those traits got people killed. Just ask Lorenzo or Angel.
Or the McTiernan Clan.
Sofia glanced up from her food, raising one eyebrow questioningly.
"Someone like Dominic can never be trusted with that kind of power. Sal knows this," I replied coolly. "Come on, let's not talk about work. Let's talk about you. How's the job hunt going?"
"Great." Her face lit up overbright as she took a sip of her wine. "I've got three interviews lined up for next week. One at a law firm downtown, another at a non-profit, and the third with a private practice."
It rang a little false in my ears, but I didn't put much stock in it. Instead, I forced a smile onto my own face. "That's wonderful. I'm proud of you, you know. You'll knock 'em dead."
A dark blush stained Sofia's cheeks, but her smile widened.
"I hope so, I'm not gonna lie."
I lifted my glass in a toast, nodding encouragingly. "Here's to knocking 'em dead."
"I missed this," I admitted quietly after a pause. "Going out...having a nice meal...feeling like I'm not hiding behind every corner waiting for an enemy to ambush me. With you, it feels like a dream, and I'm terrified I'll wake up back in that hospital bed. Or worse."
Sofia's smile grew, her fingers squeezing my hand gently. "You won't, Luca. I promise." She leaned forward, lowering her voice. "And I can give you something better than a dream."
My body tensed, a surge of lust tightening my stomach. "Is that so?" Imanaged to say, struggling to remain calm.
"Oh yeah. Much better." Her eyes twinkled mischievously, and she bit her lip as though trying to contain herself from bursting into giggles. Her joy was infectious and suddenly, I couldn't wait to be alone with her.
Suddenly, dinner seemed unimportant, and my mouth went dry at the mere thought of tasting her again. "Check please," I whispered. Sofia laughed, drawing her bottom lip between her teeth.
"Do you want dessert?"
My heart hammered wildly in my chest. "You. I want you for dessert, but not here. Not yet."
"No?"
I watched with no small amount of satisfaction as her breath caught, her pulse pounding in her throat as she swallowed. Something passed between us, something electric, and this wasn't the sexual hunger, although it was close. This was something beyond that, beyond any fleeting desire.
I tightened my grip on her hand and brushed a callused thumb over her knuckles, years of hard living meeting flawless skin.
I leaned in, just close enough so my breath stirred the whisps of hair against her temple. "I'm going to take my time with you, Sofia," I whispered softly against her ear, and she let out a small whimper.
I grazed her earlobe with my teeth, feeling her shiver in my arms. "When we do, and I assure you we will, it won't just be about scratching an itch for me...or you. I'm going to devour you, and the only thing you'll be able to do is cling to me, my name a scream on your lips when you come."
For a brief moment, her breath stuttered. "Luca—" she groaned, the tiniest sound in her throat.
I trailed a finger up her arm, her skin feverish under the silk of her dress. "I'm going to savor every moment of tasting you for the first time..."
...because it might be my last.
The heat in my belly turned sour. A headache was building, no doubt due to the music and lights, but I wasn't ready for the night to end yet. Not until I got to do one thing I always wanted to do...
"Come on." I stood and held my hand out to her, dropping it when I noticed the tremors. Shit. Why now?
"Luca?"
Instead, I circled Sofia's arm and looped it through mine, leading her away from the table, past the dance floor, and out towards a terrace I'd noticed earlier.
Sofia pulled back to study my face. "Luca, are you alright?"
I slipped on a casual smile. "Yeah. Just wanted to change the scenery."
Unconvinced, Sofia raised a dark brow, but she fell in step beside me, tightening her grip on my arm as I led her to the dance floor. I glanced down, but if she noticed it, she said nothing. She gave me a reassuring smile instead and let me lead her outside.
Out on the terrace, I was able to catch my breath. It was colder than I expected it to be out, so I shrugged off my suit jacket, draping it around Sofia's bare shoulders. Her lips turned up at the corners, and she reached for the lapels, pulling them tight.
We walked along the wrought iron railing until we found ourselves at the edge, overlooking the dark waters of the harbor below. The moon was rising, casting its silvery glow upon the gentle waves that lapped against the shore. Everything was peaceful.
Except for the wild thrashing of my heart as I took her in my arms and we began to dance.
The music was muted out on the terrace, and Sofia relaxed against me, her hand clasping mine, her head resting on my shoulder. We fell into a rhythm, moving together perfectly even though neither of us were particularly adept dancers. I spun her once, catching her easily in my arms. Sofia gave a girlish giggle, wrapping her slender arms around my neck and standing on tiptoe to whisper in my ear.
"I thought you didn't dance."
A soft chuckle rumbled through my chest, and I bent my head to brush my lips lightly over her brow, feeling her shudder as she melted into me. "I guess you bring out my hidden talents," I said with a smile, keeping her body flush to mine as I danced her in slow circles across the terrace.
Sofia hummed. "There seems to be a lot of things we bring out in each other. Things I never dreamed of...doing with someone..."
"Yeah?" I asked softly.
"Mm-hmm," she nodded against my shoulder. "Never imagined falling for someone in the lifestyle. You know. And wanting them so bad...I'd risk everything for one night with them. No matter how crazy it sounds...and knowing they might not return your feelings."
"Sofia..." I breathed, tilting her chin up with a finger and looking into those bright brown eyes that held so much emotion it made my chest ache. "If anyone here is unworthy, it's me. You deserve more than my past, more than I can offer you what's left of my lifetime--"
"What do you mean?" She frowned up at me in confusion.
"I meant...forget it," I said firmly. "Not tonight. Tonight is not for sad talk."
"But Luca, I'm serious. What did you mean?"
I looked up at the stars above, twinkling against the velvety black sky.
It would have been easy to tell her, easy to admit just how scared I was of dying alone with my greatest regrets haunting me.
It would've been so easy...and yet it somehow felt like the hardest thing I'd ever had to do.
Instead, I just held her close and danced, ignoring the pounding of the blood in my head, the way the lights seemed to flicker, the way my vision swam with each step. I needed to be close to her. Needed to be near her, to feel her heartbeat against mine. I couldn't let her go, not when all I wanted was to stay like this forever, to never let her out of my arms again. I didn't want to say anything, to even think anything that might spoil this moment we shared together. This perfect moment in time, where everything was right, where the sky wasn't falling, where people weren't dying and the noose wasn't tightening around my neck.
Just two of us dancing under the moonlight.
I wanted to live inside this moment, to never leave it. But as we continued to dance, the lights flickered brighter and my vision swam. The world began to spin around me, my limbs grew heavy and numb, and I knew what was coming. It was inevitable.
As the pain built, a dull throb in the back of my skull that radiated outward until my entire head was on fire, I tried desperately to hold on to her, to keep her with me as long as possible. Fireworks bloomed in my field of vision, and I stiffened as an odd shudder rolled through me, causing my fingers to tighten on Sofia's waist. I hated myself for this, but I didn't even have the capability to give into self-hatred right now, I was so focused on staying upright as I grasped her for support.
"Luca?"
I clenched my jaw, grinding my teeth as the dizziness turned the world sickeningly on its head. Fuck, fuck, fuck, please not now—
"Luca? Let's go home."
All I could manage was a nod, and Sofia led me off the terrace, past the dance floor and out of the restaurant without another word. In that moment, the gratitude and sheer desperation nearly sent me to my knees.
I needed her.
I needed her because I needed somebody and she was all I had left.
I couldn't lose her too.
She was everything to me...
She was everything...
I just hoped she didn't hate me when she found out the truth.
The world was spinning as we made our way to the car. My vision was in and out, dark and light and dark again, making it almost impossible to see straight. The pain in my head was blinding, causing me to stumble more than once on our way back to the car.
I thought that was going to be it for me tonight, but when Sofia opened the door, I realized that somehow I was able to stand on my own two feet again. That was the thing about my headaches, it seemed, how they came and went as they pleased. Right now, I wasn't sure if this one was passing, but it gave me enough leeway to make it up into the apartment under my own steam.
Once inside, I made a beeline for the fridge and grabbed a beer. Sofia grabbed my meds from the bathroom, and I washed them down with a deep pull from the longneck in my hand.
"Luca, are you supposed to drink with those?" Sofia asked, her brow furrowing in concern.
"It's fine," I muttered, taking another sip and hoping to God the alcohol would dull the throbbing pain in my head. In all honesty, she was right. The doc said I shouldn't drink, but I'd found that it helped stave off the migraines and shakes; this one was thankfully waning, and at this point, who the fuck cared? It wasn't like I could make my prognosis any worse.
Tonight was just another reminder of how little time I had left.
When I looked up again, Sofia was still staring at me, her expression troubled, her hands fidgeting in her lap.
"What?" I asked, setting the beer on the counter and moving towards her. I wrapped my arm around her waist, pulling her flush against my chest, and lowered my mouth to her ear. "Sofia, what's wrong? Tell me what you're thinking."
She hesitated for a moment, then finally spoke. "I'm worried about you."
"Please don't."
"Luca—"
I silenced her by pressing my lips to hers, swallowing the protest she was about to make. Her hands went up to cup both sides of my face, but when I tried to deepen the kiss, she pulled back.
"You shouldn't have pushed yourself like that. Not for me."
I gave her the best smile I could muster given the circumstances. "You're worth it."
Sofia looked away, her cheeks flushing. She cleared her throat awkwardly. Then she took me by the hand and led me out onto the balcony. The night air was cool, the stars shining overhead, and we stood together in silence for a few minutes before she turned and faced me, the look in her eyes serious.
"I don't want you to get hurt because of me," she said firmly.
I laughed a little at her fierce expression. She looked downright adorable with her eyebrows drawn together and her nose scrunched up.
"That's the last thing I'm worried about."
"Well, it's not the last thing I'm worried about," she snapped. "Luca, please promise me you'll stop putting yourself in danger. Please."
Her brown eyes were luminous as they reflected the light of the city, full of emotion I didn't deserve. My throat tightened. "No promises, sweetheart. Now come here and kiss it better."
"Is that all I am?" Sofia tried for a scowl but failed. "A distraction?"
"Baby, you're my favorite distraction."
I leaned in to kiss her, but Sofia stopped me once more. "Wait, there's something I want to ask, something we should have talked about earlier."
"What?"
Sofia took a deep breath, and when she spoke, her words were careful, measured. "I want you to tell me about Emilia."
I felt my smile fade, and I couldn't hide the shock I felt at the question. "Why?" I asked after a moment.
"Because...because it's been bugging me ever since we got together, and I think we should get everything out in the open."
"There's not much to tell. We were friends growing up. I had a crush on her. She didn't feel the same." My words were harsher, more clipped than I'd intended.
"Did you love her?" she pressed, her voice gentle.
"Doesn't matter. She loved someone else. I accepted that."
Sofia looked at me for a long moment, her eyes searching mine, her expression unreadable. "It's okay," Sofia said softly. "I'd be lying if I said I didn't wonder sometimes. You two were close."
"We were." I agreed. "But we weren't lovers, and it wasn't for a lack of trying. She just didn't want me like that. I thought it was love, but I think I was just lonely and she was kind to me."
I wasn't sure why I felt so defensive about this. Maybe because it had been such a big part of my life for so long, I didn't know who I was without that love.
"I'm sorry," she murmured. "I shouldn't have made it about me, but Emilia left me, too. But you, after everything you did for her...she broke your heart."
"It's not broken," I took her hand and placed it over my heart. "Maybe it's bruised a little, but it's still beating. It's still beating because you're here. Surviving, because of you."
Sofia's eyes filled with tears, and she blinked them back before leaning forward and kissing me.
"I'm sorry," she whispered against my lips. "I shouldn't have asked. I shouldn't have—"
"It's alright." I cut her off. "It's alright."
Sofia nodded, then buried her face in the crook of my neck.
"I don't think I ever really loved her." I felt the weight lift off my shoulders with that admission. I'd never said it out loud before. "I think I was just so hurt by what happened. It's easy to fall back into old habits, especially when they're familiar. But now that she's gone...it's almost as if I can see her clearly for the first time. I realized I loved the idea of her more than I loved her."
"Luca," Sofia began, her voice soft. "I hope you know that I would never try to replace her. She was a big part of your life, and I know you miss her--"
"I don't miss her. I think...I think that sometimes I miss that time in my life more than I miss her. I miss the person I used to be. Before this." I gestured to the ruined left side of my face.
Sofia reached up and touched the scar, trailing her fingertips along its raised edges. "This is just skin," she whispered. "You are still you, no matter what anyone else says."
I closed my eyes and leaned into her touch, letting myself feel the warmth of her fingers on my cheek. "I wouldn't go back, though. If I could get a re-do. I wouldn't go back, because then I wouldn't have you. I'd rather have now, right here with you, because even though the past is painful, things are working out exactly as they're supposed to."
She smiled, and god...I had been such an idiot for so long. How did I not see? Did it even matter at this point? No, but that didn't stop me from turning and lifting her chin with my finger, staring into the deepest, most soulful eyes I'd ever seen, bottomless and old. Old eyes for someone so young.
To me, Sofia was beautiful in ways that Emilia never could be.
My heart raced, thundering against my ribs. I felt naked, stripped bare, and for the first time in so long, it all felt right. We were the same, Sofia and I, broken and fractured and struggling to hold onto the things that mattered. Our only difference was that she hadn't dragged me down into the abyss with her. How long? How long had I kept her right here under my nose, and refused to see it? To see her for all the beautiful pieces she'd gathered over the years.
"Luca..."
I leaned in and kissed her, claiming her lips in a breathless rush. She tasted like strawberries, and champagne, sweet and gentle with a hint of vanilla, and I couldn't get enough of it. Her lips parted for me, a soft, startled moan escaping. I didn't care, and I deepened the kiss, reveling in the feeling of her. Her soft curves melting against me, her hands clinging to my shoulders as though she was afraid to let go, her lips opening eagerly beneath mine, and her tongue dancing with mine.
I couldn't believe I'd gone so long without knowing that she was right here. That I'd pushed her aside, brushed her off, ignored her for so fucking long.
And that's what fucking terrified me about her.
Because whatever this was, it held the power to destroy me.
But hell—I was a doomed man anyway. So as long as Sofia wanted me, I'd give into this thing between us and keep it going for as long as I could.
We could break the rules together. If only for a little while.
My chest tightened and I had to shift myself against the balcony to clear it, a wave of dizziness washing over me. I felt Sofia's hands on my chest, her palms flat against the fabric of my shirt as she supported me. She pulled away, her eyes wide and concerned. "Luca, are you okay? Do you need to sit down? I can—"
I shook my head, reaching out and cupping her face in my hands. In the darkness, her amber eyes were full of the same fire as mine. "You. I just need you."
I kissed her again, and this time, there was no hesitation. She melted into me, her arms winding around my neck as she pressed herself closer. Her body fit perfectly against mine, her curves fitting snugly against my hard edges, and for a moment, I let myself imagine her mine and mine alone. That we had forever together instead of months...weeks...
No. Not going down that road. Not when I had her in my arms.
I kissed her slowly. Deeply. Trailing my want for her piece by piece down the column of her throat to the little hollow where her pulse beat. It was racing, fluttering in her neck, and I nipped at the sensitive skin. She gasped, arching into me, and I groaned. I had to have her. Now. Before the pain returned, before the world crashed down around us and I lost my grip on reality. Before I forgot how good this could be.
I reached around and grasped her hips, lifting her up. She wrapped her legs around my waist as I carried her back inside, adrenaline giving me a surge of strength I hadn't felt in months. We stumbled across the apartment until we finally reached the bedroom.
"Luca?"
"I'm not fucking you on that balcony," I growled, low and possessive. "And I need to be inside you, right fucking now."