35. CHAPTER THIRTY
CHAPTER THIRTY
SEBASTIAN
Twelve Years Old
“It’s done.” I say, watching as Ronnie runs back to me.
I’ve gotten ridiculously good at making these stupid flower crowns.
Sometimes, I don’t even know why I bother, but then I see how happy Ronnie is when I give them to her.
Even now, she’s smiling ear to ear as she places the silly thing onto her head.
I’ve never seen her hair long, but she’s been growing it out from the short bob.
Her uncle said she could have it long only if she took care of it.
Ronnie swore she would. I brush it for her every night before we go to sleep.
“You’re going to break it, hold on.” I murmur, shaking my head as I shift to my knees, taking hold of the crown. Ronnie huffs but I ignore the sound, focusing on placing the crown correctly on top of her head.
The white roses are bright against her dark hair, leaves helping push them together.
I take special care when i craft her crowns, pulling the heads of the roses from their stems, stripping them of any thorns so Ronnie doesn’t get hurt.
It really only takes a few good-sized stems before I am able to form it into the shape I need.
She likes babies' breath so I make sure there are some of those in there, as well as the pink peonies.
Those are so big, they always fall out.
“Is it good?” Ronnie asks me excitedly, her dark eyes focused on me.
I raise my eyebrow at her before settling back on my haunches, nodding. Her grin widens, mine mirroring hers for a second before Ronnie launches herself at me. A grunt leaves my lips as I fall back onto the warm grass, her laughter following me the whole way down.
“I love it, I love it!” Ronnie cheers, her palms pressed against either side of my face. I purse my lips, staring up at her. The sun is so bright behind her, I have to squint. “I could kiss you!” She laughs again.
Kiss me?
I blink up at her, my nose scrunching at the thought of kissing. That’s gross. She ate cottage cheese this morning, which is just as gross. I don’t like cottage cheese. So, I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t like her kisses either.
Warmth blooms over my lips for only a second, before the weight on my chest is gone. The sun is so much brighter now, it burns my eyes, but I can’t stop staring at it.
Ronnie just kissed me.
Hesitantly, I lick my lip, bracing myself for the bitter taste of cottage cheese. My eyes widen when nothing happens.
My back leaves the grass and I sit up to watch Ronnie chase Tomato through the raspberry bushes. I lift my hand to touch my bottom lip, my heart feels like it’s about to beat right out of my chest.
Maybe…I like Ronnie kisses.
I hold myself back from spending every waking moment beside her. It’s becoming a problem, one I truly thought would be manageable, but it isn’t.
In my mind, I understand how important secrecy is. There is absolutely no room for mistakes. In my heart, I want to make up for ten years of missed time. Any care, for being caught is out the window.
It’s a war between my mind and my heart. Neither will end up the winner at the end of the blood bath.
“Sebby.” The soft call of my name is something I nearly miss.
I turn my head from the window, looking for the voice.
The voice of the girl who plagues my every thought.
Dark hair peeking out from the doorframe to my office, gives her away immediately.
The corner of my lip pulls up, while warmth spreads through my chest. Even now, she’s the oddest person I’ve ever known.
I adore her endlessly.
“I can see you, Little Dove,” I muse.
Veronica leans further, exposing her brown eyes to me.
Even from across the room, I can see the adventure sparkling curiously within them.
She’s up to something, but I know it won’t be said aloud.
There’s always been an air of mystery surrounding Veronica.
. Now it’s up to me to figure her story out.
My desk is scattered with papers of parchment, much of it untouched.
Every attempt to do work, went out the window the moment I sat in my stuffy office.
The walls are covered in floor to ceiling, dark stained oak bookshelves, adorned with volumes pushing hundreds of years old.
When I turned eighteen, this room was a gift from my father.
He pat my back and told me every good king needs a sturdy getaway.
At least the large bay window behind my velvet lined chair overlooks the garden. That is my getaway. Not some room filled with old books and maps.
I lean back in the chair, its wood creaking in protest as my elbows settle onto the armrests on either side. Veronica’s eyes narrow and I smirk, knowing her patience is limited. Whatever’s going on in that beautiful mind will have to convince me to move from my spot.
Not that it wouldn’t take much convincing… not from her.
I wait, knowing she will come back any second. Silence stretches throughout the room, counted by the soft flickers of the candle wick burning from a small silver tray upon my desk. It takes all of thirty seconds, before Veronica’s head is back into view.
Her eyebrow lifts in a question, eyes beckoning me to come impatiently.
Secrecy? Fuck secrecy.
Veronica wants to play, and quite frankly, so do I.
The chair slides easily as I push myself up; the soles of my thick leather boots thudding against the marbled floor.
She’s already out of sight, her footsteps nearly silent by the time I reach the office doorframe.
Veronica’s long hair flows effortlessly down her back, her feet bare as she runs down the hallway.
It’s late, nearly eleven in the evening and we’re in the East Wing. Most everyone will be asleep.
Her chin presses against her shoulder, the ruffled sleeve of the long cream gown moves from the motion. A smile plays on her lips, testing me.
My boots hit the ground, not wanting to make any unnecessary noise. I widen my strides, taking two steps in place of one until her chest brushes against mine. Her chin tilts and Veronica stares up at me with total adoration. It’s hard to look away, she’s mesmerizing.
From the lavender and warm vanilla scent that clings to her skin, to the lightest speckles of brown in her dark irises. I’m damned. I have been since I was young. She was always going to be my reckoning. Little did I know, she is also my salvation.
Veronica stays silent, her fingers clasping around my wrist to tug me along, as if we are still children.
There’s little light leading down the hallway, and as we descend the staircase.
Still, she moves as if from memory alone, guiding us quietly through the palace, until we’re at the side entrance, leading to the garden.
The french set of doors open with ease, Veronica runs out onto the stoned path before I can speak.
Her grip on my wrist loosens as she strays farther ahead.
It’s beginning to rain, clouds darkening in the sky, as I close the doors to follow her.
She’s completely unfazed, even when the soft mist rolls into large pearls.
Her laughter is drowned out by the hiss of the steady stream above.
Within seconds, our clothes are soaked. We aren’t even supposed to be out here right now, but how could I say no?
I’ve always followed Veronica, and I will always allow her to lead me within her chaos.
“Ronnie, Jesus,” I huff out a laugh, slicking back the wet strands of my hair until I can see again. The sight in front of me steals all air from my lungs. In the midst of the garden, no flower could ever compare to her beauty.
Veronica stalks backward, her head tossed to the sky without a care to the world.
Both arms are spread wide on either side of her petite figure as the rain falls.
She’s ethereal, the kind of beauty that one would want to put on display for the world to see.
All I want to do is hide her, keep her safe from the life I’ve come to hate.
Her chin tips down, eyes dark and wide in the light of the moon.
Color blooms on the apples of her cheeks, painting them in the faintest pink.
Veronica’s lips pull up into the softest smile I think she’s ever given me.
My chest twists with a mixture of emotions I pushed away long ago, finally rising to the surface to fight in a vicious battle.
“I love you.” The words slip from my lips before I can register them. “I know, I’m not supposed to. I know how fucked up I am for even saying it, for allowing this to continue.”
All the happiness vanishes from her soft features. Her eyes don’t leave mine, they’re wide and full of hesitation. The look is breaking me, tearing at my heart while it beats harshly against my rib cage.
“If I could rip my fucking heart out and give it to you, I would.” My voice shakes. I step closer. “If I could go back, I would have ran with you.”
A choked sound rips through Veronica. Tears mix with the rain that continues to fall upon us.
The confident, carefree girl I know isn’t standing in front of me.
No. She’s replaced with someone… I’m not familiar with.
Veronica is scared, fucking terrified. I hate myself for bringing out this side of her.
“I love you. I…” Veronica doesn’t allow me to finish, her mouth crashes into mine as she closes the distance between us.
The kiss is everything. She pushes her emotions against my lips and I swallow them eagerly.
I waste no time lifting her off of the ground, guiding her legs around my waist with ease.
Her hands grip my cheeks, not allowing us to part.
I will gladly suffocate if that is what she wants. I’d thank her in the afterlife.
Even with my eyes closed, I walk us to the gazebo in the middle of the garden.
Ivy vines wrap around the wooden white pillars, covering the roof completely.
My feet move on autopilot, navigating over the steps leading into the opening.
I’ve spent my whole life in the garden, I could walk the length of it blindfolded and still find my way out through the maze of bushes and flower patches.
I lift my hand to cradle the back of her head, tangling my fingers into the long, dark strands. The banister holds her weight as I slide her ass on top. Veronica doesn’t remove her legs from around my waist, keeping us glued together. Her fingers dig into my cheeks, our teeth clattering together.
The need for air becomes too great, making me slant my face to the side.
Her lips stay against the corner of my mouth as we both inhale deeply.
Our ragged breathing mixes, the sound quickly filling the space under the gazebo.
Neither of us speak, our hearts beating together as one.
I allow my eyelids to flutter open and I catch movement across the garden.
My fingers dig into her hair as I keep her close, not allowing Veronica to move.
“We should go back inside.” I murmur against her cheek, keeping my gaze on the faintest flicker of candlelight. Her body slumps against my own, the disappointment radiating through her, but I can’t risk either of us being seen.
By the strength of God, I pull away, easing Veronica back to her feet. She wobbles for a moment, collecting her balance before tilting her chin up to look at me. My eyes search hers and I lift my hand to brush back some of the damp strands that cling to her cheeks.
Veronica leans into my palm and I stroke her skin with my thumb gently. She’s everything to me. She always has been, even when I pushed all memories of her to the deepest, darkest pit of my heart.
I lean in, pressing my lips to her forehead tenderly. It’s a kiss of promise. A promise to get us out of this, together.