48. CHAPTER FORTY-THREE
CHAPTER FORTY-THREE
VERONICA
Sebastian is so lovely. He is so, so lovely.
The laughter physically hurts. I grip my stomach, curling slightly forward as it leaves my lips. God, I feel so stupid. How did I ever think this would go differently? I’m not supposed to be in Sebastian’s world. I was never supposed to be.
All of it was a dream, an illusion so carefully crafted in my mind because I wanted to believe I could be more than just the girl from the village.
I wanted so badly for the knight to come save me from the nightmare I lived in.
Sebastian was never a knight. He’s a prince, who grew into the same heartless king as his father.
“Right, how could I forget the many letters you’ve written?” I huff out, the laughter subsiding. I run my thumb under my eyes, gathering the tears to stop them. I’m done crying. I should never have cried over this man.
Sebastian’s face contorts, his eyes searching mine.
“I was practically drowning in them,” I continue, sarcasm dripping venomously in my tone.
Even as I watch his face fall, I admire his beauty. This will be the last time.
He takes a step forward, the pads of his fingers pressing into the end of the bed as if to steady himself. “Ronnie… I wrote every day. I didn’t miss one.” Sebastian’s voice is tight, so soft. “I could only send them at the end of the week but I…” It’s the same softness of his voice as a child.
His confusion is adorable. I’m so naive.
Sebastian looks so small, all I can see is the young boy I grew up with. He tricked me then, he won’t do it a second time.
“As for me signing something, I —”
“It’s gone.” I cut him off. Our eyes lock.
“What is gone?” Sebastian pleads, stepping closer to me.
“Any chance I had at a life beyond you,” I lift my chin to stare at him, “You signed away my future.”
His fingers dig into my shoulders, palms warm against the sleeves of my dress. I sway with the shaking of my body, but I don’t look away. His expression is desperate, heartbreaking. I’m too numb to care. I can’t feel the hurt, not anymore.
“Stop speaking in fucking tongues, tell me what you mean!” Sebastian shouts, his voice cracking.
The sound of it must get Gareth’s attention, because the door swings open, my true knight standing on the other side of it.
We tilt heads to where Gareth stands. He looks furious, the blue of his eyes completely taken over by black. My protective teddy bear.
“Get your fucking hands off her!” Gareth’s voice dips in clear warning. Another laugh bubbles up from my throat, leaving my lips. Both sets of eyes are back on me, I ignore it. Hearing Gareth serious is so funny to me. I can’t take him seriously, even with everything happening right now.
I’ve lost my mind. Truly, it’s just gone.
I envy the finches outside singing. I want to be outside too, singing.
Sebastian releases his hold on me as Gareth charges towards him.
My laughter rings through my own ears, and I step toward the open windows where the finches are resting on a branch.
Anything shouted behind me falls on deaf ears, I focus on the birds.
There’s a nest on the branch, tucked up close to the thick trunk of the oak tree.
Tips of tiny beaks pop up from the mess of leaves and twigs holding the nest together.
Babies. The finches are a family.
My lips pull into a smile, and warmth blooms in my chest at the sight. I hope they are a happy family.
“I can’t have a family.” I break the laughter, my words breathy.
I turn away from the window with a frown, away from the happy finch family. Sebastian and Gareth stare at me with wide eyes and furrowed brows.
Gareth’s back is pressed to Sebastian’s front, his neck completely wrapped with Sebastian’s forearm.
His cheeks flushed, lips parting to gasp for breath.
I stare at them with a blank expression, my heart finally settling in my chest. Sebastian releases Gareth from the hold, his chest rising and falling rapidly as his gaze stays glued to me.
A grunt leaves Gareth as his knees collide with the floor, igniting a thud that vibrates beneath my bare feet.
Their ragged breathing drowns out the finches, pulling me back to reality.
“Salpingectomy.” I hate the word. It’s bitter on my tongue.
Sebastian hasn’t spoken. He just continues to stare at me. Gareth too.
I lift my hand, pressing it to my abdomen.
The fabric of the gown is soft, not quite silk but higher than cotton.
It’s comfortable, more so than the dresses I wore when I was a handmaid for Sebastian.
My lips quirk up into a small smile, chest filling with an ache so deep it blocks my airway.
I let my palm run over the fabric, warmth blooming against my skin.
“My fallopian tubes, they’re gone. Signed away by Sebastian James Baros.” I say casually, almost fondly. All of the blood in Sebastian’s face drains. He looks mortified at my words, like he didn’t already know. The fucking bastard.
I don’t flinch as the door to my room is slammed shut, Sebastian disappearing behind it.