1. In my defense, I have a severe allergy to rapists. #2
Color me not surprised. “That damned ball is going to be the death of me, I swear. I am quite pleased that the ball will have the wedding ceremony, but trying to arrange a date is turning into a complete nightmare. That the brides broods were able to turn women is wonderful, but you neglected to mention that all the turnings were of elderly partners of ancient vampires, and we’re only delaying so they can attend—and three of those women are in my brood! ”
When I’d first become the matron of the brood, I hadn’t known how many of the men had mortal wives close to death. Upon finding out, I’d negotiated for the three in the most danger to undergo being turned, handled by her husband with backing from Emerick, myself, and Mistress Avalon.
The turnings had gone without incident, and the women settled into their new lives with their husbands in our brood, going to the brides broods for training.
I’d run risk of pacing holes in the floor while we had waited for each to awaken.
Per the brood’s tradition, she’d been laid to rest in our bed.
In a new twist, her husband waited at her side.
I didn’t want to imagine their fear, waiting to see if their love would continue into an eternity or if all hope would die with the setting of the sun.
“Eugene, you are going to have your work cut out for you, especially should you decide to merge your brood with young Emerick’s.
It is a good deal for you, and you will be in a position where you do the most good with the least stress.
And don’t think you can trick me. I do not know how you turned out as you did, a nurturing spirit who would rather work in the background for the better of others. Really.”
Without missing a beat, Eugene engaged our father in a staring competition and answered, “You are the reason I turned out as I did.”
My father sighed. “Do I look like a nurturing father figure who would encourage such awful things?”
“Yes,” my brothers replied.
“Nonsense. Pepper, don’t listen to these silly sons of mine. They’re insufferable, really. Take them home with you. And do have one of them carry that nasty head. Did you have to keep it?”
“Yes. This nasty head is worth three million dollars.”
Eugene whistled. “I’d be keeping the head in that case, Dad. Why is this one worth so much?”
“He’s a rapist and a serial killer,” Alisander answered. “He’s been hunting the eastern seaboard for a decade, and he has over a hundred known kills to his name, quite possibly more that we don’t know about. You would have been an ideal target for him, Pepper.”
I nodded. “That’s why I stayed up past my bedtime for a morning snack.
He never hunted near dawn or dusk, so I assumed he was finding somewhere to shelter.
Once I narrowed down his general location, I decided to have a rather disgusting breakfast. I’ll have a proper dessert to make up for that nastiness later. ”
My father sighed. “You’re never going to stop calling your husband dessert, are you?”
“I’m really not. Hey, since I have you here anyway, I have a favor to ask of you.”
My father raised a brow. “What do you need?”
“I need to find a donor car for Emerick’s daughter.
She’s a Beetle, and she’s in very sad shape.
” As hunting often involved a great deal of waiting, I kept a little card with his daughter’s vital statistics on it.
“She’s a 1938, which means she’s ridiculously rare.
His daughter was the first they ever made of her, and that means I’m absolutely fucked trying to find parts!
” I thought about flinging the bastard’s head across the park, but I resisted the urge.
“I had no idea just how insane his daughter is until I started looking for donor cars for her. Do you know what’s impossible to get?
A donor car for a 1938 Volkswagen Beetle.
Clearly, I know nothing about cars, because I thought she was cute and just needed a bath and some love from me, her new mother. My daughter is a pain in my ass!”
My father burst into laughter, stepped over, and kissed my forehead. “All right. I will see if I can find another 1938 to sacrifice to your new child. If I can’t find one, you’re actually in luck, as one of my vampires is a machinist and can make the parts you need.”
Relief washed through me. “Really?” I dug out the card detailing my daughter’s various ailments, and I handed it over.
“Here is the current diagnosis list. I had to stand there for three hours while Emerick cried over the state of our daughter. I’ll confess, I found a 1938, but she’s in good working order, and I refused to hurt her.
She is our second daughter now. That leads me to my next problem. ”
“You need someone to teach you how to drive her,” he guessed in a rather unimpressed tone.
“You can drive me home in her if you like, but if we get a single drop of blood in her interior, somebody dies. That somebody might be you. My brothers can cram in the back. We’ll emerge like vampiric clowns, defying the vehicle’s available space.”
At the rate my father kept sighing, I would drive him insane before the day was through. “Where is she parked?”
“I’m hiding her at Master Kennwick’s house in his garage. I have his number, and I even brought my phone with me. She has a full tank of gas, and she just had everything tuned and checked, so she should be good for a drive.”
“Very well, I will drive you home. Kennwick surely has a bag or box we can stuff that head in.” My father tossed Alisander a set of keys.
“You can even keep the car once we’re done tonight, but no complaining that I’m making you fetch it.
Let’s not test your sister when it’s her first time walking under the sun. ”
“Sweet. You’re okay with ditching your car?”
“I just gave your sister a Jaguar, so it’s your turn to be shown a scrap or two of parental affection. I’m going to be busy doing other things, and I won’t need some prissy little street princess. I acquired a rather nice pickup for myself.”
Both Eugene and Benoit licked their lips.
“It seems my brothers are split into two camps. The younger ones seem to like manly pickups. The older one wants prestige and horses.”
“I was a baby when he gave me my first horse, and I suffered from the need for speed ever since,” Alisander told me with a grin, and he spun the fob and keys around his finger.
“His pavement princess is currently an Alfa Romeo, and she’s basically a family car that forgot she’s a family car and tried to be a racer.
She’s a family car with racing aspirations.
I love her, and I’ll treat her better than he will. ”
I remembered the Alfa Romeo; I’d seen it a few times over the years, although I hadn’t really placed it as my father’s car. “Oh, the cherry red one that complains if he holds her back because she wants to go but it’s not really legal to drive her almost two hundred on city streets?”
“Yes, that’s her. He’s taken you out in her?”
“I’m pretty sure that bastard bought that car on my eighteenth birthday but kept it for himself.” I eyed my father.
“You have unfortunately good memory.”
I put some serious thought into throwing Brandon Smith-Howards’s head at my father.
Once again, I resisted the urge, settled with a pained sigh, and shook my head.
“You are lucky that my Jaguar has been adopted by the entire brood. They love her. You’re also lucky Emerick got me a purple Toyota to learn in, else the entire brood would be stricken with sadness.
I am not allowed to touch the Jaguar until I am proficient behind the wheel.
I’m learning in the Toyota. I broke his heart with that stunt. He’s a Honda man.”
My father laughed. “I have seen pictures of you with your Toyota. You were quite excited when you picked it up. I believe your Emerick hoped to offend me with the vehicle, but he has not yet learned I am a doting father, and that means safety comes first.”
“I am never going to get used to the idea that you’re a doting father,” I informed him.
“But I will give you a slightly better mug for driving my Beetle home, though. I want to see Emerick’s face when you pull into the parking garage and we pile out of his car’s twin like a bunch of vampiric clowns. ”
“One day, I will understand your sense of humor. Today is not that day. Eugene, take that nasty head from your sister before she tries to see if there is any blood left in it. Alisander, if you could go get the car sometime today?”
“I want to see if she tries to kill you.”
When my father glared at my brother, I laughed. “Not today. Tonight, perhaps, if he doesn’t treat my new little baby with the love and care she deserves.”