Not Alone #2
“I heard this crow screaming your name over and over while I was scouting over the forest, so I figured he was with you and told him to come along,” Aerie said.
“You can talk to Noxie?” I handed her the clothes I had scooped up when she transformed in the woods, and she started getting dressed.
“When I’m in my vey form, yeah. I can talk to all the birds.”
I turned toward Noxie, tears still swimming in my eyes. “I’m so happy you’re here, Noxie.” The comfort that washed over me as I stroked his feathers, relishing the warmth of his life, was overwhelming.
He cocked his head to one side and gave me a caw.
“Can someone get these cuffs off me? I’d really like to talk to my Familiar.”
“Ooooh, he’s your Familiar? That’s so rare, and so badass! And it’s a bird! I knew I liked you. Dray, the key to the cuffs?”
“I left it at base. We’ll get them off when we get there.” I caught the hint of a warning in the look he gave Aerie.
My heart dropped a little. “And how long until then?”
“Between the glythyrs and our combined magic, it should take two weeks,” he said.
“Two weeks?!” Two weeks seemed like a lifetime to be on a boat, especially with these cuffs on.
“Elyssar Sea is not small.” He was so dry and brittle in his words.
If we were crossing the Elyssar Sea, then that meant we were definitely headed for Elyndor. This would be my first time off the continent of Ashenholt—this was taking freedom to a whole new level.
I could deal with two weeks.
Dray gave the order to get us ready to depart, then told me to follow him.
He took me into a large cabin off the deck.
It was bare, with only a table with a few rickety chairs at the center and a few lit candles.
There were several doors off the main cabin, and he led me through the one second from the far end.
Inside was nothing but a small bed against the wall, a small table next to it with a candle, and a dirty mirror on the wall.
“I’ll get a towel and some extra clothes from Aerie. Keep the coat. It’s cold on the water. Bathroom is right next door, last one on the left,” Dray said.
“Thanks. Should I call you Dray or Drayce?” Aerie had introduced him as Drayce, but everyone seemed to call him Dray.
He stared at me for a moment, searching my face and lingering on my scars only momentarily, his jaw tightening—not like he was repulsed, but as if he was angry. I could see conflict in his eyes. Being in this male’s presence made me nervous, and knowing he didn’t trust me didn’t help.
I thought he wouldn’t answer me, but then he said, “Drayce.”
“Well, Drayce, I’m Naci. And thanks for, you know…saving me. Even if you were rude about it.”
He just scoffed and turned toward the door.
“Hey, I know you don’t trust me, but I don’t exactly trust you either. I don’t know you, and you don’t know me.”
He stopped just before walking through the doorway to the main cabin and, without looking at me, snarled. “I didn’t live in Ashthorn or dine with the enemy. And I was certainly not engaged to one of them.”
I felt as if I’d been kicked in the gut. So that was why he didn’t trust me… Why he was looking at me with pure loathing.
“You believe all that shit they made me do and say? I was a prisoner! They used my sister to control me, and I was never engaged to Varyn.” The beast in my chest still slept with the cuffs on, so the rage boiling in my blood was all me.
Of course, he believed the propaganda… I’d become the perfect villain in the king’s story. But how dare he?
Still looking at the floor, hands balled and sharp canines on display, he said, “Varyn, huh? I know what I saw at the ball.”
My anger surged, but faltered for a moment when I realized…
“Wait, you were at the ball? It was you! You did the darkness thing and the cards.” I thought back to that night, but I hadn’t seen any of the rebels.
Had it been his voice that shouted, “We are the flames of the night” before disappearing?
The shock of the revelation quickly wore off, and I remembered to be outraged at his comments.
“Well, you clearly left early if you think I’m on their side.
You must not have seen that I killed a royal guard, burned the hand off the royal ambassador, and was cuffed before I could attempt the same with the prince.
I’m not the enemy. They killed my sister!
I wasted away in a dungeon cell across from my mother’s bones, staring at them every day.
She was one of you, and so I am, whether or not you like it or believe it.
” I was angry with him, even though I could understand the mistrust. Part of me just wanted him to believe me.
I saw the sadness flash across his face at the mention of my mother, but I didn’t care. He didn’t get to hurt more than I did over her death. So I marched past him to the door on the right and entered the bathroom before slamming the door shut.
He hadn’t said a word. Maybe this would be a long two weeks after all.
* * *
I took a makeshift bath and stayed in the bathroom as long as I could before having to go back out and see him. I couldn’t understand why, if he hated me and believed all the lies the king spread, he would lead a rescue mission to save me.
When I came out of the bathroom, dressed in Aerie’s far-too-short clothes that had been left in front of the door for me, Aerie herself was sitting at the table in the main cabin.
“So you know, not all of us believed the king’s bullshit.
Dray is just…hard-headed. He looked up to your mother and was devastated by her death.
And for what it’s worth, I know it was a long time ago now, but I’m sorry.
” Everything about her, from her tone to her face, told me she was being genuine.
I appreciated it, but didn’t have the right words to say, so I just smiled.
She stood up from the table and gave me a sad smile in return before stopping next to me. “You’re gonna love base. And personally, I can’t wait to see what you can do with your abilities. From what I heard, they are wicked cool.”
She was mischievous. I liked it.
I stayed in the main cabin, seated at the table for a long time after Aerie left. Noxie had found his way into the cabin and was on the table to my right. Just his presence was a massive comfort, even if I couldn’t talk to him for the time being.
“I suppose I can’t hide in here for two weeks. Let’s go see the Elyssar,” I said to Noxie as I stood up, and we headed for the door out to the deck.
It was definitely cold, and I had refused to put Drayce’s coat back on after I’d gotten dressed. But all thoughts of Drayce left my mind when I approached the railing and looked out to sea. The dark, nearly black water stretched out as far as the eye could see.
I laughed to myself at how literal that thought was for me and my one good eye.
Bramick came to stand next to me, resting his forearms on the railing. “You remind me a lot of Keryth.”
“Really?”
“I first saw it in your eyes. Of course, both of hers were green, but the same color as yours.”
I actually didn’t mind at all that he brought up my left eye, which was no longer green. It didn’t feel like a dig, but more like an acknowledgment that it was there and not something to be ashamed of.
And then I realized…Bramick had two different colored eyes, just like me. His were brown and blue—but he could presumably see with both—and mine were green and black now. The thought was oddly comforting.
“But after I heard your sharp tongue and sarcasm, your personality reminded me of her even more than just in appearance. I’d guess you were pretty young when she joined us. Do you remember her at all?”
“I don’t. I was a baby when she…left.”
“I can tell you about her sometime if you like, when you’re ready. There are plenty of stories of her kicking every male’s ass at base. Mine included.” He smiled at the memory. It seemed that both Drayce and Bramick had looked up to her.
“I would like that, thank you, Ponytail. I mean, Bramick! Shit, I’m sorry, that was what I called you when you were a guard. I nicknamed all the guards that way.” I didn’t get embarrassed often, but I was right then, feeling my face heat.
He just burst into laughter, making me smile sheepishly. “Ponytail, eh? What did you call him?” He pointed over his shoulder at Buzzed Head.
“Buzzed Head…”
Bramick laughed even harder. “Hey, Kaelor! Hey, c’mere real quick.”
“Oh gods, Bramick, please no.”
He ignored me. “Kaelor, guess what she called us when we were posing as guards?”
Bramick told him, and I knew my face was beet-red. They both laughed, but it didn’t make me feel bad. It made it feel like…I was in on a joke. Like I was laughing with Nella.
That’s when I realized I was actually laughing, and I had no idea how long it had been since I last laughed.
“Well, Naci, it’s nice to really meet you. You can keep calling me Buzzed Head if you want, but the name is Kaelor. At your service.” He extended a hand to me, and it took me a moment to realize he was expecting a handshake.
Men didn’t usually shake hands with me, let alone fae males.
As I grasped his hand and we shook, I was sure I felt eyes on me from behind. But when I turned around, all I found was Drayce, with his back facing me, at the helm of the ship.
As Bramick and Kaelor fell into conversation, I looked back out across the water.
It felt peaceful, as if my mother and Nella were with me.
And for the first time, thinking of them did not make me sad.
It made me smile.